Asuka-chan in Wonderland
Chapter 4: Bunny sends in a little Mill
Asuka walked about for a bit, then discovered to her shock Rei. Rei was mumbling something in a flat voice. As she got closer, Asuka could barely make her words out. It went something like this. "The Duchess. The Duchess. Oh my dear hands. Oh my cheeks and mascara. He'll have me punished, as sure as LCL is LCL. Why did I throw them to that giant? I wonder."
If you have trouble picturing Rei worrying about something, or wondering about something, have no fear. You're not stupid. I'm in the same boat, and I'm the author. Says a lot about my intelligence level, eh? Asuka had only one retort. "Wondergirl, do you have any idea how out of character that sounds!"
Rei slowly turned to face Asuka. The German girl suddenly found she didn't like the look on the First Child's face. She took a step back uncertainly. Something was very wrong here. "Marian, what are you doing here?" The albino abruptly said. Asuka had the impression that she was acting in front of a huge audience. "Run home this instant and find me a pair of black leather gloves and a riding crop, as well as a big Japanese fan. Quickly, or I won't have time to go to the annual Miss Dominatrix contest."
"What am I, your maid! And since when did you participate in dominatrix contests! Has the whole world gone insane! (No, but you are ;)" Even as she said this, the Second Child felt strange, as if some giant hand had plucked her up and moved her around. She somehow ended up in front of a very dolly looking house. There was a silver plate with 'Rei Bunny' engraved upon it. The whole place was painted pink, had hearts painted all over it. Lol. (A slight jest, a very bad one too, about the actual Rei's total lack of feminity) Heck, there was even a little red bow here and there. (For those with the philosophical soul, this could be an allusion to Asuka's feeling that she has to grow up to be strong. I wonder if I wrote this with a subtle message in mind. Adopts pensive pose and appears to ponder it for a moment. Nah!) Feeling 'gasp!' curious, Asuka got in, and sweatdropped. The inside a rat's nest of 'girly' crap, like dolls, and tea sets. Trying not to gag in disgust, the redhead picked her way through the junk. If she found the crap that doll told her to, she might be able to get out of here. She'll probably be taking orders from Pen-Pen next. Wait, she killed that goddamned penguin already.
Just then, she noticed a distinct change in the atmosphere and shivered. The room was beginning to change. The petal pink of the walls turned into black. All the dollies and crap turned into leather whips, gloves, leotards, garters, lingerie, (O.o Rei fan boys, consider this a tribute to you) and other…stuff. On a counter, Asuka saw a glass of some weird looking red stuff. She suddenly felt thirsty and gulped it all down. She gagged. The thing tasted like blood. A strange tingling spread through her body. She was suddenly growing, and it seemed her skin wouldn't fit for quite a few moments. Her arms grew larger than trees. Her head swelled up like a hot air balloon. (An allusion to Asuka's swelled ego. Head full of hot air, get it! Ha-ha. Erm backs away slowly from the staring audience.) There wasn't any room left for her in the house. Her pinky felt especially squeezed. Asuka was forced to sit and wait the unexpected growth spurt out. Her anger meter, which had cooled to absolute zero, or close, began climbing at a steady rate. Soon, her arms and legs stuck out of the house. It was very uncomfortable. Then, she heard a certain girl's monotone outside. "Marian, Marian, I forgot to tell you to get me a leather bra. I should have a new one on my spare cage. Oh my. There's a monster in my house.
"Something wrong, Rei?" A new voice asked.
It was Kaji! Asuka's soul sang with joy. He wasn't with Misato after all. (Actually, he is, as you are in a wonderland right now. The key thing is that this is an alternated version of the real world. Misato and Kaji are probably… Well, I'm not going there, as this fic is only rated PG, and I'll keep it that way! ;)
"Yes. There is a horrible monstrous giant in my house. I think it's trying to steal my corset." The monotone replied. Asuka realized that the tight thing on her pinky was actually a lacy black corset. O.o. "Go and get it out Kaji you mill, or I'll be late to see the Duchess, and we all know how he'll react." The monotone continued.
Asuka managed to get her eye to a window. This was no small feat, considering that she was so cramped inside the house that there wasn't room to let through a mouse. To her intense shock, Kaji was dressed like, well, a mill. There was even one of those spinning things that you saw in the pictures of Scandinavia, or wherever all those mills are. "Alright, I'll climb down through the chimney and pull that monster out." Kaji assured the albino.
"I don't know. Isn't the monster a bit too big to pull out of the chimney?" Rei asked dubiously.
"Oh come on. It works in the movies." The big man said casually. He dropped what he was holding, which Asuka somehow managed to see was a watermelon. (Symbolism anyone?) Having by now figured out that food was what made her change size, she eagerly reached out and grabbed it with her car size hand. "Hey! That's mine!" Kaji yelled as he fruitlessly tried to retrieve the fruit. (Pun unintended)
It was a bit too late for that. Asuka quickly gulped down the watermelon whole and with the skin. (Don't try this at home kids!) She began shrinking at an alarming rate. In a matter of seconds, she was little more than 5 centimeters tall. "Hey!" The mini-Asuka piped. "What's the problem with this thrice cursed world!"
"Well, that problem's wrapped up." Rei calmly entered her house and took stock of the damage with a single sweep of her eye. The place looked like a cyclone had hit it. Lingerie and riding crops were everywhere. "I'll clean this up later." Ayanami said to herself as she picked out a pair of gloves and a riding crop in the mess (No small feat) and left the room.
"Well, she didn't even notice me." Asuka wondered to herself. Then again, she shouldn't be surprised. She was the height of a mouse. She quickly got up and brushed off her dress. She then scrambled out of the house. Luckily, Rei hadn't had time to close the front door, seeing as that would make her late to see her precious "Duchess." Kaji was nowhere to be found unfortunately. Cursing the day, Asuka set off towards a tall forest of strange trees. Wait, they were grass, which now looked very large to mini-Asuka. Then, she came to a mushroom. On the mushroom sprawled a very familiar person dressed like a millipede.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE!"
To Be Continued…
Note: Heh heh, left you at a cliffhanger eh? I already figured out who the millipede will be, but feel free to guess. It's a bit short this chapter, but I've got a report on virus and bacteria DNA to type. TT. The allusion to Marian, like Maid Marian from Robin Hood is a nod to Asuka's masculinity. Marian was a warrior-woman after all. Please leave some thoughts of the story, and bear with me! The next chapter will be titled "Advice from a Millipede." Thank you and review!