...crap:

DaLuver: Your...mini-me's? Ummm...I have no comment on that... I'll try to reincorporate the skipping. And...yay...pink... Sorry, I'm slow. I'm really focusing on reading To Kill a Mockingbird...so sad... And next I have to read the Giver (I've already read it for regular school, but I have to read it again for college classes!) Yeah, this sucks.

AngelPrncss07: Yes, thank you for complimenting...my lack of sanity...? I'm used to the language, but can you imagine what 'duck on a microwave' might actually LOOK like...? gets strange look on face shakes head vigorously...Rather not...leads me to think of Snape...in a clown costume...dancing with me...in a pink dress...shudder

Piedermort: Glad to have you back! The DADA teacher is modeled after DaLuver, but I am giving it traits of some of my most insane reviewers. If you want me to do something to her or have a quote for her, I AM YOUR INSANE MAN—LADY!!!

ahem

And, yes, you do have a great ally in me. TOGETHER WE SHALL CONQUER THE WORLD WITH MY ARMY OF SQUIRRELS AND BATALLION OF HUMMINGBIRDS WITH COLORFUL FLAMING SPORKS AT THEIR USE!!!!!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

WE SHALL PREVAIL!!

MWAHAHHAHHA--choke cough

Anyway, you are right, Voldemort is no match for us!!!

Lady of the Underworld.

SillyBandit: I just thought, 'What's a random animal: Duck. Thing: microwave. (I had a TV dinner earlier)' Hence, duck on microwave.

Periwinkle Magic: Yeah, you CAN NOT spell, in fact, you suck at spelling, you're the Michael Jackson of spelling, but I won't linger on the subject. (Heh-heh I compared you to MJ!) Yeah, I start school back Sept. 1. It sucks. I hope this is 'son' 'enuff' 'four' 'u.' Of course, the story is great! I am great! (Dude, I am SOOOOOOO arrogant) Eyes close?

I waited like two minutes to write this, so if you reviewed this chappie later on, I'll respond next chapter or something.

yawn Just read or...enter threat

Draco watched in boredom as Snape listed ingredients to one potion or another on the board. Even if he screwed it up, which was highly unlikely, he was still Snape's favorite student. Though, Rory was looking good as opposition. He looked over at the brunette who was smirking as Troy looked defeated at his worm tails. Ty was looking at him around Rory. All I heard was: "...Troy, ya gotta do it..." "...made the bet..." "Eat it, eat it!!!" "...shut up..." ".....stop him?" ".....brought this upon yourself...." Then I watched as Troy hastily took three worm tails out of the jar, threw his head back, and dropped them in his mouth. Rory looked on in disgusted amusement, as Troy made a face and gulped them down quickly. This was followed by insane laughter, which got Snape's attention. "MR. JEFFERSON!!! MR. ATKINS!!!!" Snape yelled, conveniently leaving out one of his favorite students. "This behavior is un-Mr. Atkins? Mr. Atkins, are you alright?" Snape asked. Troy subsequently looked up, shook his head vigorously and dashed out of the classroom, hand over his mouth. Ty and Rory glanced at each other chuckling, the class staring at the doorway confused. Rory got up and said, "I'll go help him..." She walked out the door, but caught it before it closed behind her, poked her head in, and said, "Umm...clean up on aisle five?"

Deep inside your soul there's a hole you don't wanna see
Every single day what you say makes no sense to me

On their way to DADA class, Rory walked up to Draco and matched his pace. "Hey, Malfoy. About that date thing..." Draco's heart leaped and his stared over in her direction. A glimmer of hope shone in his eyes. This was his chance to ask her. This Saturday, when they had to go on that DADA date. "I was thinking we could go to Three Broomsticks and check out the supplies. Gryffindor try-outs are next week and I wanna be prepared. Then maybe we could grab a butter beer and some lunch?" "Umm...sounds fine to me. I'll meet you at ten at the Three Broomsticks?," Draco said, excitement entering his voice. "Sounds cool. See ya, Malfoy."

Even though I try I can't get my head around you

"Okay, pass up your papers, puppets," Rikka ordered as the students consented and did as they were told. "I'm sure many of you were wondering if this had some point to it or if it was just some crazy scheme plotted by me to drive you to the brink of insanity. I just wanted to tell you, it was a bit of both, so let's get started," Rikka announced. "As for the 'what food or drink are you?,' I made a potion to see what food or drink you actually are. We'll see you were right and I made you say what you thought of the others just for my own amusement. Okay first up! Troy Atkins?" Troy got up and walked to the front of the room. Rikka plucked a strand of his hair and threw it in the brewing potion. "Ow! Dammit! Give some warning would you?" The potion turned various colors and finally settled on bright orange. It projected an image above the cauldron. A cup of pudding floated above the boiling water. "Ohhhh...Troy here is pudding. (a/n snort) Agile, but stubborn. Evasive and funny. I like pudding," Rikka explained, scribbling on a clipboard.

Somewhere in the night there's a light in front of me
Heaven up above with a shove, I beg it's me

"Brandon Boyd?" Brandon walked up to the front. The same process followed, except with the color green. A bottle of whiskey appeared above it. "Ohhhhhh...alcohol!! Bad Brando! Bad!" she reprimanded, hitting him over the head with the clipboard. "Intoxicating, addictive, DESTROYS BRAIN CELLS, maybe we should check you out Brando, burns going down," Rikka murmured. "We're watching you, Brando! No drinking! I'll be there!" A very frightened Brandon walked away cautiously. "I'm never drinking again..."

Even though I try I fall in the river of you
You've managed to bring me down too

"Ty Jefferson?" Ty jogged up to the front, with a hair already plucked. "I don't like pain. Heh-heh." Rikka looked disappointed that she didn't get to inflict pain upon her student, but threw in the hair. It turned several colors again before changing to a vibrant royal blue. "Mmm-hmm," Rikka mumbled. "A tangerine. Looks completely safe and innocent, but once ya get down deep, its sour. Yeah, ya make people cry, but doused with the right combination of sugar, people enjoy ya. Mmmm...tangerine."

All you're faking (Get Up, Get Up, Get Up, Get Up)

"My favorite Slytherin, Drakie-poo!" Draco sauntered lazily up to the front. He handed her a platinum colored hair. "What? You didn't actually expect to touch MY BEAUTIFUL hair, did you?" Rikka sighed and threw it in the cauldron. It became a mixture of emerald green and black. A picture of a solitary cherry was projected. "A single cherry. Independent, looks delicious, but people never expect what is inside, the pit," Rikka mumbled, completely serious for once. She glanced into his eyes.

Shows you're aching (Get Up, Get Up, Get Up)

"Potter. Up here, now!" Rikka ordered, her dislike for the Wonder-(which-Gryffindor-boy-he's-dating-)Boy was evident. Potter looked up surprised and walked up to her. She roughly plucked a piece of his disgustingly unruly hair. She threw it in the potion and waited for it to turn. His was a red potion. Rikka smirked as she announced, "Milk. Goes bad easy and starts to wreak. It'll do ya over good. And some of us are lactose and tolerant." The class giggled and guffawed, Potter blushing in embarrassment.

Every single day what you say makes no sense to me

"Monica Seville!" Rikka called, as Monica jumped up and SKIPPED down the rows of desks excitedly. "Ohh!!! Ohh!! Pull my hair, pull it! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" Rikka did as she was told and pulled on of Monica's dark brown hairs, avoiding the orange highlights. The potion immediately turned pink. A hologram of a glass of pink lemonade floated above the potion. "Ohhh!!! Pink lemonade!! Well, number one, its pink, two, sweet, once you get past the sour, three, refreshing, and ultimately four, SUGAR!!!" The two girls laughed insanely together, SKIPPING around the room.

Lettin' you inside, isn't right, don't mess with me

"Blaise Zabini," Rikka called. He handed her a short strand of dark hair. Rikka tossed it in. The potion turned gray. A projection of a coconut appeared. "Coconut. Kind of unappetizing shell, but once you get inside, everything is sweet and soft. And once you get in, its pretty hard to get out, until something pulls you in another direction," Rikka said, again, unusually serious and calm.

I never really know what's really going on inside you

"Next, Auwowa!!!" Rikka called, using baby talk. Rory took a breath and walked up to the insane woman. "Here," Rory said offering a strand of dark brown hair. Rikka took it and tossed it in the liquid, which turned silver and black, swirling together. A hologram of a wave of water showed up. "Ahh...water: fluid, translucent, elusive, flowing, and free. Beautiful." Rory sat down immediately.

I can't get my head around you

"And as for me, I am any kind of chicken! BECAUSE I AM THE CHICKEN LADY!!!!!!! Oh, strike a pose!! Duck on a microwave! Prowling Hummingbird!! GIANT DANCING SQUIRREL!!!!!!"

All you're feeling (Get Up, Get Up, Get Up, Get Up)

Shows you're breathing (Get Up, Get Up, Get Up)

Draco walked into the Three Broomsticks, to see Rory already there, kneeling in front of a glass case. He looked down at his watch. He was on time. "Hey, Malfoy! Get your arse over here!" Rory yelled. Draco sauntered over to where she was kneeling and looked at what she was deliberating. It was padding. Not just any padding though. Padding made exclusively by Sky Overlord Inc. "What do you think about it? I thought I'd ask you," Rory murmured. "Great stuff. Expensive, but well worth it," Draco explained enthusiastically. "Yeah, my old stuff was getting old, dirty, and a tad sweaty," Rory wrinkled her nose. "I'll take it," Rory announced to the attendant. "That'll be 20 galleons, 2 knuts." Rory dished out twenty-one galleons. "Keep the change." "Thank you, Mam!" She then realized Draco was staring at her. "What? I told you I'm rich. I'm a Salvien!"

Deep inside your soul there's a hole you don't wanna see
Covering it up like a cut with the likes of me

After they got done with the Three Broomsticks, it was only 11:30 and neither of them were hungry so they headed down to a candy shop and bought an assortment of candy to last them all week. Rory got Troy some chocolate frogs mostly because he was scared of the things, she got Troy some gummies, and Calica some chocolate frogs. She got herself an array of chocolates and gummies, along with tooth flossing mints. She still loved the things.

You know I've really tried, I can't do anymore about you

The two finally decided to head back to a little restaurant around 12:30. Rory ordered a cheeseburger and Draco had a Delmonico steak. "Mmmm....meat," Draco mumbled. "Ugh...I swear, you boys are all the same. Food, sleep, sex, food, sleep, sex," Rory complained. "So? What's your point? It's a guy thing." Rory rolled her eyes. A comfortable silence followed.

The cut's getting deeper (Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh)
The hill's getting steeper (Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh)

Draco put down his fork and knife and swallowed his mouthful (he got the impression that Rory would be disgusted if he didn't). "Rory, I have a proposition for you," Draco started. This grabbed Rory's attention. "...Go on..." "Well, I've come to the conclusion that I really like you and I would REALLY like it if we could start over. You've gotten your revenge, that you deserved, and now, could we, you know, star fresh?" Draco asked, stumbling. He'd obviously never done this. "So...we would forget everything we've ever done to one another, forget revenge and blood, money, and houses?" "Well, um, yeah, I know it sounds hard, but I'm sur--" Rory put her finger up to his lips and held her hand out, saying, "Hi, my name is Rory, formerly Hermione Granger, and also Dawn Salvien. I'm seventeen and in Gryffindor, much to my dismay. I fight for the light army and my best friends are Ty and Calica Jefferson, Troy Atkins, Ginny Weasley, Neville Longbottom, and Luna Lovegood. And you are...?" Rory smiled gently, and in turn received one from Draco. "My name is Draco Malfoy. Seventeen and Slytherin Sex-god. Goons: Crabbe and Goyle. I have my very own fanclub, and so does my hair. (a/n INCLUDES ME!) I really like you, but I doubt I'll ever understand you."

I guess I'll never know what's really going on inside you
I can't get my head around you
I can't get my head around you
I can't get my head around you
I can't get my head around you

EVERYONE REJOICE!! I HAVE FINISHED!!!!!!!!!! Really soon too! Pretty long too. Happy Monikka? does I'm-done-god-spam-it! dance I ludge you all. NOW R&R BEFORE I ATTACK YOU WITH HUMMINGBIRD, WOODPECKERS, AND SQUIRRELS, AS WELL AS COLORFUL FLAMING SPORKS!!!!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH!!!!! (is my evil laugh overrated?)

Zanza

Lady of the Underworld, and all the rest of my freaky titles