A/N Thankyou to those who have already reviewed! If there is anything that cheers me up on a bad day, it's getting reviews, no matter if they are good or bad, helpful or not. You know the ones I would prefer though. This is the first chapter, the introduction of CAITLIN. I hope you have a good laugh reading it, and if you have any weird things you would like me to add into the story, please let me know. 

Ps: There was no harming of any creatures (mythical or real...we don't know) in the making of this story.

'Dad!! Give it back!' Caitlin whined, and soon began chasing her father with an imp powered chain saw. 'That's my thing!'

'No it's not, this thing belongs to Froodoo!' Panted the tall (yet smaller then his daughter) Elf lord Elroond at a fast trot.

'No it's my thing!'

'No it's not dear,'

'Yes it is, that thing belongs to me,'

'Ok,' Lord Elroond surname Spooon, stopped and straightened his glassless glasses, 'what does this thing do?'

'Ur, It turns people invisible when they put it on.'

'Put it on!? Put It On?! How can you put a thing on? It does stuff, Okay? and it is not yours. So nar!' Elroond turned and sprinted off into the distance. His grey floppy toupe (with accent) flopping with each nobly stride.

'Ooh I'm going to pound the living daylights out of him when he is senile!' Caitlin sat down heavily on the grass, at the age of 600 000 her father still was too fast for her. It was his nobly kees.

She was six foot 5 and had small horns protruding from either side of her head, just above her ears. Her long light brown hair curled slightly at the bottom, (it always did that when it rained) and her green eyes (that were outlined in heavy black eye liner) flashed an angry red. The youngest and tallest of her 12 sisters, and, 14 brothers, she was surprisingly not mentally damaged, which was usually the scenario for the youngest of an army of heavily doped up and disturbed siblings, in fact, it was the other way round. Her oldest sister Arwen thought herself to be a marshmellow, her twin brothers Aladin and Alrohoy had been missing for a few years until they were found disguised as unicorns in the local forest, Marwen, Darwen and Karwen's ears had dropped off for no apparent reason, the list was endless. Caitlin was thought to be linked with these happenings, as before she had been 'born', the Spooons had been one big happy family.

She really did have it hard; her only enjoyment in being in this Manicly happy place was beating up its Manickly happy habitants. She couldn't even do that any more, on every door in the whole of Rivendale, were security bars, made out of Mithroll. The chamber of her Mother and Father even had it, since she was 4 when she pretended to have a nightmare so as to be allowed in. Once she had tried to pop out her Mother's eyeballs with a spoon, and succeeded, it had been locked off from her forever. 'It's a good thing Elves can grow new eyeballs little missy,' stated Elroond to his daughter, shortly after the accident/experiment, 'if she had been a hooman, she would be blind!'

Caitlin thumped the tree next to her, it shook. Why hadn't she tried to pull out the teeth?! Her intentions were never bad, until now, at the age of 15, she felt like killing everyone around her with the very imp powered chainsaw in her hand. The chainsaw's humming slowed, then stopped, the blades slowed, then stopped.

'Oh bugger.' Caitlin muttered, then started fiddling around her long black, Gothic over coat. The saw had run out of imp, really, she must stop being so careless, leaving it running like that. 'ahh.' She unzipped a moving packet, and pulled out a handful of squealing, little imps, then promptly stuffed them into the small box like compartment on the side of the saw. She closed the lid, in a matter of seconds (after the small screams had subsided) there was a faint frying smell. Imp powered chainsaws had been band for years; luckily; Caitlin had found this antique one in the local museum.

She had made a few alterations since then, for one thing, it had been band because the imps often died of exhaustion from pushing the wheels round and round, now, they died from being dosed in petrol from sprinklers above, then set alight. The heat from the burning imps boiled the water that created the steam that powered the wheel that made the sharp bits turn.

Kill everyone around her? Hmmm. Her thin scarlet lips curled into a smile. One of those smiles those bad guys do in movies, when the camera zooms in on them just before they shoot the head off the good guy. She quickly turned off the 2-foot long chainsaw, and tried to hide it behind her back.

In that 13 years, Caitlin had lost her puppy fat (pity, she always liked sumo wrestling with the other children, which leads onto another story of one of her unfortunate siblings.(Let's just say she sumo sat on her over a drain grid...nasty...plastic surgery would not have sorted that one out.)) She was now very tall and slim, and Gothic. She never went outside without putting Fairy paste on, so she kept her porcelain complexion, porcelain. She had tried to dye her hair black to add to the look, but her horns got in the way so she gave up.

Caitlin walked slowly but briskly up to the centre of Rivendale; there on a platform was the bell (which you could only ring if there was danger about, it gathered everyone to that area fast) she took one high heeled boot step up on to the raised platform.

'Here it goes.' Her long fingers closed around the dangling rope thing you pull to ring the bell. She rang the bell, then screamed so as to get their attention.

'Help me! Oh help me!' Immediately a rush of Elves swarmed out of all their warm cosy little homes, like ants. They stopped suddenly, and there were a few over dramatic gasps heard from in amongst the crowd. Caitlin grinned, like a mad person, or someone who likes inflicting pain... or death on people.. (don't you just love the metaphors...). Then she pulled the chainsaw from behind her back and it started with a hrm hrrm hrrrmmmmmmm.

'Help me!' she squealed again, 'I'm going to Kill you all aha aha aha.'

A/N Like? Please review.