Disclaimer: I do not own Javert. And neither does any other fanfiction writer. And yet the abuses that the poor bastard has to suffer from us are horrendous. This is a testament to the various popularly found permutations of his suffering. In pace requiescat.

Before anyone starts screeching at me for libel, I have no one specific in mind when I write this. Well, I will for one chapter… but trust me, it'll be really obvious.

The velvety (a/n: mmmm, velvet! sounds like Velveeta, i love Velveeta!) darkness of the night was strewn over with diamond (a/n: sparklez!) stars, twinkling in their eternal vigilance over the mortals below them (a/n: teh poeticness!). If they had bothered to direct their eternally vigilant (a/n: wait didn't i use those wordz already? lolzi3z) gaze towards the bridge of Ponte-Au-Change (a/n is that right? i can't spell today whoooo 2 much Cherry Coke hee hee oky i'll stop now plz review in the end, k? kthxby), they would see a tall man with a cane walking down it.

He was thinking; his face was frowning.

What he could be thinking was not hard to figure out. He had spent all his life chasing a single man, and that man had turned out to be a good man. Javert's mind was boiling. Everything that seemed right was now turned out to be wrong, and what was wrong was now right (a/n: i love that song! ok ok i'll stop now). Valjean was a criminal, a low, vile, dissolute (a/n: SAT word lol) creature without rights who deserved to be in hell for his evil deeds…

"Nom d'un chien, what is this rubbish you're talking..?"

Excuse me, Mr. Javert, kindly shut the heck up while I'm trying to write your patoot, mkay?

So he went out to the bridge and stood there. The rain-swollen waters below him raged and twirled and did other things raging waters do. (I don't know what they do, I've never seen a river with rain-swollen waters. It just sounds cool, so there.) Yes, he decided, he was going to do it. There was nothing to live for on Earth anymore. He had wasted his life. Justice, that faithful and stalwart goddess, turned out to be nothing but a will-o-the-wisp. Order was overturned and nullified by a single act of mercy towards him, an unworthy servant of the law…

"Careful there, you're actually starting to sound coherent."

Geez Louise, would you be quite there, Mr. Sarcastic? Like, I'm trying to write here. Gosh darn it. If you don't like my storie, don't be in it!

"Would that I could."

Ugh. Anyway,

Javert looked over the rails at the raging waters and took a deep breath. Then he took off his hat and put it down. Then he took a step back, then one forward, then another step back, then forward again, then he sort of squatted a little, then,… hey, wait a minute! HEY! I WASN'T DONE!

Shit.

Author's Note: Did you like it? I know it's short but I had to run feed my goldfish Fluffy. It was absolutely imperative that I post these 300 words right away for everyone's benefit, even though nothing happened in them that the reader wouldn't already know from reading the book or listening to the musical. PLEASE REVIEW! Oh, and no flames. Nice peoiple only plz! All flames will be used to roast marshmallows and back ribs (meta a/n: i'm soooo funny :))