Blood Red Roses

by Semby

A look inside Giles' head between scenes in the season two episode, Passion, just before coming home to find Jenny

Title: Blood Red Roses
Author: Semby
Disclaimer: I'm still not Joss.
Summary: A look inside Giles' head between scenes in the season two episode, "Passion" (just before coming home to find Jenny)
Note: Written for the lj community 12monthsofbtvs's June challenge for Giles.
Feedback: Please. Constructive criticism welcome.

Giles walked down to his car from the Summers' house, feeling somewhat helpless in his inability to offer anything to Joyce in Buffy's defense. It was probably for the best though – Buffy was seventeen years old and could be counted on to handle these situations on her own. His contributions in these mother/daughter matters could only be, well, troublesome at best.

As he stepped into his car he nodded to himself resolutely. He had other matters to take care of tonight at any rate. Jenny had said that she would stop by once she was done with whatever project she was working on tonight, but she hadn't given him any real indication of how long it would take. He hoped that when he got home he'd still have time before she arrived to fix his hair, put on some comfortable – but not too comfortable – clothes, and exchange his glasses for contacts. Perhaps he'd also put on a record: something romantic, yet cool. She'd only said she'd come over to discuss the findings of her project, but he thought he had more than a little reason to believe that that was just her excuse for a more… social visit.

Jenny had, after all, admitted only the day prior that she had unintentionally fallen in love with him. He didn't feel it was necessary to tell her openly that he felt the same way; he knew it must have been written all over his face for months. And if she still had any doubt, well it was better to play it cool than admit it brazenly – and tonight he intended to show her fully the extent of his feelings for her anyway. If, as Jenny had coyly revealed, Buffy had indeed intervened on his behalf and told Jenny he missed her, that proved that he had her support and that there really was no further reason to hide his feelings.

Of course, when things had first fallen apart, he was hurt most at Jenny's betrayal of their trust and the fact that she had kept such a secret from him. However, there had been many nights when his initial anger had long worn off when he sat home alone cursing his loyalty to his slayer for preventing him from going back to Jenny, cursing the fact that the best relationship he'd had in more years than he could remember had reached a crashing halt when it appeared to be at its most promising. It was those nights when he couldn't fool himself into believing he was still angry; he knew he was more in love with her than ever and that the only thing keeping him from her was the betrayal he anticipated seeing across Buffy's face if he were to even try to reclaim Jenny. All of those nights he could only hope that his distance wasn't forcing her to move on and forget him, as he knew he wouldn't move on or forget her any time soon. So many nights alone hoping that it wouldn't be too late to go back to the way they were by the time the worst of the bad feelings between them had diminished.

And finally, finally, it felt like things were coming together. Tonight would be the night that the lonely nights would end; he could feel it. There would be no more sitting at home with his booze, wondering not only if she was finding comfort with other men but if she was safe from the dangers that he knew lurked around every corner in this town. No more wanting to reach for the phone to make sure that she was okay only to realize that doing so would cause far more complications than he was ready to deal with. But if tonight went well, it would never again feel wrong to call her when he was worried. It would never feel wrong to ask her to come over for awhile because he was so goddamn intolerably sick of being alone.

As he pulled into his parking spot by his house he thought again to their exchange the day before. "I didn't know I was going to fall in love with you… Oh, God - Is it too late to take that back?" He gave a happy sigh and closed his eyes peacefully for a moment, leaning back into the driver's seat. There was no reason for her to take back her declaration just as there was no longer any reason for him to hold back similar confessions brewing inside of him. The one positive in the revealing of Jenny's true origins was that it showed him that they had more in common than he had known. He too had come to Sunnydale with only his duty in mind; he hadn't expected to fall in love either. He was so indescribably glad that he had found a woman like her to show him that it was even a possibility.

Giles stepped out of the car and began the walk through his building to his door, estimating the shortest time it would take Jenny to get there and ticking off in his mind what he had to do to prepare for her arrival. His appearance, certainly, and he supposed there were a few things lying about that could use tidying… He snapped out of his musings as he reached the door and noticed the blood red rose attached to it. His face broke into a warm smile as he lifted it from the door. It seemed that fixing his hair was no longer an option but he suddenly wasn't so concerned anymore. He couldn't believe she was here already, and she'd obviously put even more thought into the occasion than he had. Perhaps she had shifted her all her efforts to a different "project" for the evening.

As he stepped into his apartment and heard the soft operatic music playing – not necessarily his first choice in genres but it was romantic nonetheless – his belief in her intentions to set the mood for romance increased even further, although he was confused to not find her waiting for him as he entered.

But then he noticed the wine and the note – Upstairs – and as he headed slowly and nervously upwards, there were the candles lining his path, and even more roses. She had obviously put a lot of thought and effort into creating the perfect setting for a tender reunion and, he could hardly dare even hope, the perfect setting for seduction.

He took one final breath on the top step before entering his bedroom, knowing that whatever she had waiting for him inside, it was sure to be an unforgettable night.