Ch.6 Wonderful

Rating: R (This is a really dark chapter. Really strong language, violence, and (just for lack of a better word) dark in general, so be warned!)

"Where the hell have you been you little bastard?!" Rick's mother was sprawled out on the couch, probably drunk and high as usual.

"I tripped, fell into the pond." He put his dry backpack onto the table and began walking upstairs.

"Watch the carpet! You're getting it all wet!"

"I'm fine mother," he whispered, his voice emotionless, though she wouldn't have heard him anyway.

Closing the bathroom door behind him, Rick shed his jacket. He propped himself up on the sink and looked into the mirror. Seeing himself soaking wet, his anger bubbled to the surface. Shrieking in anger, he slammed the insides of his fist against his reflection.

Enough shards of glass remained that Rick could still see his distorted reflection. Then, he looked at his hands. Blood was dripping, drop by drop, into the sink. Suddenly, he fell to the floor crying. He was so tired of everything. He wrapped his hands in a washcloth.

He looked downstairs. Sure enough, his mother had finally passed out cold. A determined look on his face, he went into the hall closet. After a few minutes of scrounging around, he had found what he was looking for, his father's old hand pistol. He had no idea why his mother had kept it after he died, but she had.

Slowly, he touched the cool metal with his hand.

I close my eyes when I get too sad
I think thoughts that I know are bad
Close my eyes and I count to ten
Hope it's over when I open them
I want the things that I had before
Like a Star Wars poster on my bedroom door
I wish I could count to ten
Make everything be wonderful again

He closed his eyes as he remembered the song that he had declared as his motto when he was younger. It was called "Wonderful". Very ironic uh?

Hold my mom and I hold my dad
Can't figure out why they get so mad
I them scream, I hear them fight
They say bad words that make me wanna cry

In between lyrics, one of his more suppressed memories came back.

A much younger Rick arrives home to find his parents arguing in the kitchen. Not old enough to realize to stay away, he stands in the doorway.

Mr. Murry is in another one of his fits. "How could you do this to your family?! Spending all our money on those fucking drugs! That was supposed to last us all month!!" He gets right up in his wife's face.

"Don't pull that shit with me! Who spent all the money on beer and his hookers last week?!" She screams at him.

His face turns beat red and he loses it. He slaps Mrs. Murry with the back of his hand. He starts to beat her. "Never speak to me like that ever again you bitch!!" A horrified Rick attempts to step in.

"No! Daddy stop!" He steps in between his parents.

"Get the fuck out of the way!!" Mr. Murry shoves him into the living room, causing him to land on the back of his head.

"Don't touch him you asshole!" Out of Rick's sight, Mrs. Murry screams in defense of her son.

"Shut the fuck up!" Mr. Murry grabs a dining room chair. He walks out of sight and the next thing Rick hears is the screams of his mother and the sickening sound of wood on flesh.

Close my eyes when I go to bed
And I dream of angels who make me smile
I feel better when I hear them say
Everything will be wonderful someday

Rick runs, horror-stricken, up to his room. With the lights turned off, he crawls under the covers. He shakes as he prays for his mother's fate not to become his own.

At least a half an hour later, light pours into his room from the hallway. He peeks out from the covers and to his terror, sees his father with a belt.

Promises mean everything when you're little and the world's so big
I just don't understand how, you can smile with all those tears in your eyes
And tell me everything is wonderful now
Na na na na na na
Na na na na na na
Na na na na na na
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now

Rick, now battered and bloody, still lays unmoving under his covers. Tears are streaming down his face as the pain ripples over his body.

"Ricky?" He hears his mother's voice and can tell she is crying as well. "I'm sorry about your father honey. You know how stressed he is. He's warned you time and time again…" She sighs and stands in the doorway. "Things will get better."

Go to school and I run and play
I tell the kids that it's all okay
I laugh a lot so my friends won't know
When the bell rings I just don't wanna go

"Rick?" One of the boy's few friends runs up to him the next day at school. "Why do you have bruises all over your face?"

"I lost my balance and fell down the stairs." He carefully repeats the lie his mother rehearsed with him.

"Let's go play basketball!" The child completely forgets any of his concerns.

"I'm going to go inside." Rick can barely move much less play any sports. The library is much safer to him.

Go to my room and I close my eyes
I make believe that I have a new life
I don't believe you when you say
Everything will be wonderful someday
Promises mean everything when you're little and the world is so big
I just don't understand how, you can smile with all those tears in your eyes
When you tell me everything is wonderful now

As Rick sits in his room, horrible images about his father run through his mind, his father's dead body in the middle of a car wreck, his father six feet under, his father's remains after being eaten by maggots and worms…

"Ricky?" His mother walks into the room. "It's your father. He was in a car wreck." Rick swore a smile crossed her face as she said the last part, "He didn't make it." He knew he was right when she spoke again. "Everything will be wonderful now!"

Na na na na na na
No
Na na na na na na
No
I don't wanna hear you tell me
Everything is wonderful now
Na na na na na na
No
Na na na na na na
No
I don't wanna hear you tell me
Everything is wonderful now
I don't wanna hear you say
That I will understand someday
No (no) no (no) no (no) no
I don't wanna hear you say
Hope has gone in a different way
No (no) no (no) no (no) no

That was the happiest moment of Rick's life, second, if at all, only to the day he had laid eyes on Terri McGregor.

He loved spending time with them, Terri and her father. They were such a perfect, happy, normal family. They were everything he had ever wanted out of his own life.

"Maybe I should just make everyone happy and get this over with now. Save Spinner the trouble." He looked at the gun. Deciding to get it all out, he wrote his last thoughts.

Suddenly, he felt as if he had an epiphany. "Why hurt myself?" His face was emotionless. "I'll give them their own medicine." He put the gun in his backpack.

I don't wanna meet your friend
I don't wanna start over again
I just want my life to be the same
Just like it used to be
Somedays I hate everything
I hate everything
Everyone and everything
Please don't tell me
Everything is wonderful now
Na na na na na na
No
Na na na na na na
Please don' t tell me
Everything is wonderful now
Na na na na na na
Please don't tell me
Everything is wonderful now
Na na na na na na
I don't wanna hear you tell me
Everything is wonderful now
No
Please don't tell me
Everything is wonderful now
Na na na na na na
Na na na na na na
Oooo yeah yeah
Everything is wonderful now

Rick walked into the bathroom, calmly bandaged his hands, and cleaned the sink.

See? I told you it was really dark. I just didn't see Rick coming from a family that didn't make the Osbournes look like the Brady Bunch.