Part 25 – A Dark Turn

Two weeks later

With a loud sound, the curtains and windows were opened. Some mumbled sounds of protest could be heard from the bed Irina was lying in.

"Good Morning, Milady," Sarah cheered happily, leaning out of the window and breathing in the fresh air of the city – which actually smelt a little rotten. But the young maid was too excited to care for the bad smell. Irina, on the contrary, pulled the sheets over her head and turned to her side. A few seconds later, Sarah pulled the blanket away from her.

"Sarah!" Irina exclaimed slightly outraged, sitting upright in her bed, her hair all tangled.

"I'm sorry, Milady, but the lord gave me permission to get you out of bed with all means necessary – even if that meant that I have to steal your sheets."

"He didn't say that!" Irina contradicted angrily, trying to grab the girl.

"Yes he did! He wants to go to the city with you in order to fetch the dress you ordered a few days ago. You have to try it on and alterations have to be made, so you look absolutely perfect for your audience tomorrow." Sarah chattered, putting the sheets down on the armchair that was the farthest distance from the bed. Irina growled, and covered her eyes with her hands.

She was not an early riser, in fact, getting up early ruined her mood for the whole day. And if she was awakened by having her blanket stolen, her level of aggression was at its highest. With a deep sigh she fell back onto the mattress and curled up, hugging her legs. She had just closed her eyes and dozed off again, when Sarah slammed the door loudly, starting a loud cheerful singing. It was too much for Irina, and she sat up after a while and started yelling at the girl.

"SARAH! Would you just shut your mouth and leave this room? Give me another hour or I swear, I am going to..." she burst out.

Sarah smiled. "Oh, the lord predicted that you would react that way, and he said that you should fight with him if you have any complaints."

Irina breathed in deeply. That was typical for Jack. Surely, he would have no problems at all if she came to him and yelled at him for waking her up that early after he had kept her awake during half of the night. He would simply tell her that she needed her dress, and therefore, it was necessary for her to get up. And damned, she knew he was right and that all yelling was futile.

With the darkest expression she was capable of, she got up and sat down in front of the mirror, taking her hairbrush. Still singing, Sarah came to her and took the brush out of her hand, starting to comb Irina's hair. The procedure was regularly interrupted by Irina's angry outcries when Sarah pulled too harshly. The maid ignored her. She knew that she wasn't doing anything wrong, but that Irina was angry and outraged and most likely tired. So she tried to cheer the woman up by telling her how wonderful London was and what she had the fortune to see – a fortune Irina didn't appreciate as much as Sarah.

While the maid was still young and excited, Irina already felt bored by the behavior at court. Nothing happened, the meeting in the tearoom in the afternoon was the climax of the day. During the last few days, she had only seen Jack when they were out visiting London. Here in the royal palace, he barely had time for her, since he had to talk to other counselors and people he knew. It was impossible to go anywhere without Jack meeting somebody he knew.

Yet she tried to see the things positively and not show her feelings, although she had asked herself more than once whether she was totally out of her mind.

Thirty minutes later, Irina knocked at the door to the room Jack was sleeping in. It was custom that a couple didn't share a room – a fact which Irina found rather disturbing since she missed Jack's warmth when she woke up. At night he returned to his own room in order to prevent rumors or disgracing Irina's honor. He knew that the people were already talking about her and her origin.

When Irina entered Jack's room, he was already smiling at her. Obviously he was in a very cheerful mood today. He saw her dark expression and opened his mouth to tease her, but she lifted her hand.

"Don't!" she warned sharply and sat down at the small table, where breakfast had been prepared for them. Jack raised his eyebrows, but didn't comment. He sat down opposite to her, while a young maid served them tea. After she was done, Jack told her to leave them alone, and the maid hurried out of the room.

"Are you feeling alright?"

"Am I feeling alright? I don't know... should I feel alright when I am forced to get up after only five hours of sleep? Just so we are clear, I will not allow you entrance to my room tonight." Irina ranted and took an apple from the plate with fruits. "And stop grinning."

"I'm sorry..." Jack said honestly. "But you're just so sweet when you are angry."

Just having opened her mouth to continue her ranting, she did not know what to respond to such a charming compliment. Her cheeks blushed slightly, and Jack noted it, but didn't say anything. He knew better than to tempt her further. Although he himself enjoyed the small quarrels and fights they had from time to time, he didn't want the whole court witness it. And even less did he want Irina to be the subject of more rumors than she needed to be. So he left her alone for the time she needed to calm down. He knew that her mood would soon improve if she had eaten something and drunk some tea.

"Jack..." Irina indeed addressed him around fifteen minutes later. He lifted his eyes from the newspaper he was reading and lowered his cup of tea.

"Mmm?"

"If we are in the city today, can we go to the park that we discovered three days ago? I mean, after we have the dress, of course."

He smiled softly, feeling warmth running through his body. God, how much he loved this woman.

"Yes, of course. We can eat dinner in a small pension and spend the afternoon in the park."

Irina's face lightened up, and she smiled at him. Jack knew how much she liked the city, and he himself was glad for every second that he didn't have to spend in the palace. He wanted to spend time with her and that was impossible when being here, since wherever they went, he met a person he had to talk to out of courtesy. And although Irina had not said a word in complaint, he knew that it bothered her to just stand there and smile while he was talking to a person she didn't even know.
The more he had observed her at court, how she tried to adapt to the manners that were requested, the more he was convinced that she didn't belong here. Not that she behaved inappropriately, on the contrary. She behaved like a perfect lady – but that also meant that she didn't show her fiery temperament anymore. And that was exactly what he loved so much about her. He missed her snappy comments and the way she yelled at him when he had said something wrong. She was just not herself when being at court. He knew how much she despised the behavior, and yet she was showing it herself now - so as not to dishonor him.

The day before she had even taken an insult against the Russian part of her family with merely a courteous smile. Jack appreciated the gesture, but enough was enough. Of course he knew that there was no other way for Irina to behave, but he was determined to put an end to this as soon as Irina was officially his wife. He would retire from active duty. Considering everything that he had done for this country, he had every right to, and he felt that this was just the right moment. He wanted to start a family with Irina, and his child should have its mother's spirit, not the false attitude that was manner at court.

Thoughtfully, he observed Irina finishing her breakfast. Instead of worrying about her behavior, he should worry about other things first. He still hadn't talked to her. Yet, he had to tell her about the information he had received in the queen's letter before she had the audience the next day. Otherwise, Irina would learn the truth about the raid on their house twenty-five years ago from her...

When they left the palace forty minutes later, both felt as if a weight was lifted from them, improving their mood. Irina even made some teasing comments when they were in the tailor's store, and she was standing on a chair while a few younger women hurried around her, correcting the cut here and there.

When they returned to the palace in the late afternoon, they had spent a pleasurable, refreshing day out, both being rather cheerful. Retiring to their rooms, they dressed for the evening soiree that was going to take place – as it did every evening. Irina sighed when she looked at her face in the mirror while Sarah did her hair.

Another evening filled with boring conversations and information that didn't interest her in the least was lying before her. She would have to listen to rumors and gossip about absent ladies for hours. Sighing deeply, she leaned back.

"Sarah, why am I doing this?" she murmured, and the young maid laughed.

"Because you love him. You look so beautiful, Milady... you can compete with all those ladies down there combined."

"Yes... but I don't even want to compete with them actually..." she murmured. "And the thought that the rest of my life is going to be like this scares me."

"But it won't." Sarah continued to chatter happily. "You won't live here all the time. You will be at Bristow manor, and soon you will get pregnant, and then you will not feel bored anymore. You will start a family."

Irina sat up so abruptly that Sarah accidentally poked her with the hairpin. "I'm sorry!" she cried out in shock, but Irina just stared at her in the mirror. Pregnant... family... the words resounded in her head and caused a certain nausea to build up inside her. Surely she should have thought of that before. She could be already pregnant – but what if she was? Her future was still uncertain... she was still uncertain. She loved Jack, that was unquestionable, but suddenly the possibility that she was pregnant was so close. Was she ready to settle down and start a family yet?

"Milady, are you alright?"

"What? Yes... sure... go on please, Jack is certainly already waiting for me." She murmured absently. She would love to have Jack's children of course, but she didn't want her children to grow into the life she was leading right now – having to listen to gossip nobody was really interested in, and bowing in front of the government.

When she went downstairs twenty minutes later, she looked so stunningly beautiful, that Jack stared at her for ten seconds, until he remembered that he was expected to offer his arm to her. Irina didn't even realize his fascination. She had only smiled at him very shortly.
After the audience tomorrow she would speak with Jack about her concerns. She trusted him, and if what he said were true, that he loved her, he would understand her fears and give her time.

"Are you alright?" Jack asked quietly into her ear when they entered the huge ballroom.

"Yes, of course." Irina nodded and forced herself to smile at some ladies she had met two nights before. "I just... feel homesick I think."

He looked at her concerned and then bent to her to place a tender kiss on her ear. "I promise, we will leave as soon as possible."

She smiled at him faintly and pressed his hand. "Thank you." Then she loosened from him to greet the women. Jack looked after her tenderly and went on to a group of men who were members of the council.

Time seemed to pass by even slower that night. Every time Irina's eyes wandered to the large clock at the wall, she wondered how it could be that only a few minutes had passed. When the dance floor was opened, she danced courteously with the lords who asked her to. She had looked out for Jack, but he seemed to have vanished – most likely he was engaged in a political discussion with a group of men in one of the parlors.
That was not unusual. Most of the ladies didn't see their own husband once at parties like this – a possibility which most of them took to pursue flirtations or even more, start an affair. Maybe she would have to do that in order to gain Jack's attention. She smiled at that thought, a smile that her dance partner mistook for a flirtatious gesture, reducing the distance between them. Irina was happy when the orchestra stopped playing for a moment, so she had an excuse to leave the floor in order to get rid of the man.

A little lost, she strolled through the people who were having conversations at the edge of the floor. Desperately she scanned the room for Jack, but even if he were present, there were so many people in the room that it was almost impossible for her to spot him.

Instead of Jack, she suddenly spotted Arvin Sloane five meters away from her. He was overlooking the dancing couples, standing there as if he were not involved in the party in any way. Irina turned around slowly, trying to retire unnoticed, but it was too late. By chance, Arvin saw her, and when she heard him call her name, she knew it would be insulting not to stop and greet him. Therefore she turned and smiled courteously.

"Lord Sloane... what a pleasure to meet you here!"

He took her hand and placed a soft kiss on her knuckles, his eyes never leaving hers. The way he was looking at her made her feel cheap, and so she did her best to excuse herself as fast as possible.

"I'm sorry, but I was just looking for my husband. He must be here somewhere, and I should rather..."

"Oh, I just met him five minutes ago. He seemed to be actively involved in a discussion about the latest tax reductions. You should rather not disturb him now."

"Oh..." Irina murmured. "Well... I..."

"Shall we dance?" Sloane asked, offering his hand to her. Irina looked around in a last desperate attempt to find an excuse.

"I'd rather not..." she started, but Arvin interrupted her softly.

"Don't tell me that the most beautiful woman at the party tonight, insults me by refusing to dance with me." He pulled Irina softly onto the dance floor and ignored her initial resistance. Irina followed him. She knew that he was right. It would be insulting to not dance with him, and every insult she committed would reflect negatively on Jack. Arvin was a powerful man at court, and besides, he was one of Jack's friends; therefore, she forced herself to be kind. Silently, she prayed for the orchestra to pause again soon.

Arvin Sloane started a leisurely chat with her, which Irina only took part in if absolutely necessary. She did what etiquette required her to do, but not more. Avoiding looking into his eyes directly, she scanned the room for a sign of Jack.

"You know Milady that you have my greatest respect for your decision?"

"What decision?" Irina asked absently.

"The decision to stay with your husband, despite his involvement with your past. After all, it must have been a shock to you." Arvin continued, and now Irina looked at him in confusion.

"Milord, I don't know what you are talking about."

"You don't have to worry. The queen filled me in confidentially. I know about the circumstances. I was aware that Jack's father had always used his own methods and even sometime committed crimes in the name of the kingdom. I knew that those methods were the reason for his final execution – but I would have never thought that he would go so far as to start an unsanctioned raid on your house."

Irina stared at Arvin Sloane, the meaning of his words seeming so unreasonable to her that she didn't know what to say.

"Yet, I admire that you still have the strength to stay with your husband after you learned that his family destroyed yours. There are not many wives who would act that way – especially when offered the chance to annul the marriage."

"Wait..." Irina murmured, her feet refusing to follow the dance steps any longer, and she accidentally stepped on Arvin's feet. "Jack's father... raided our house and killed my mother?" She stared at him, her mind working frantically. The picture! The picture in the attic room she had seen... the portrait of Jack's father! Now she knew why she had recognized him. Although the man in the portrait was a little older, the similarities were undeniable.

"Oh my god..." she whispered, and suddenly the room started to spin in front of her eyes. Her heart broke, and her whole future seemed to be lost suddenly. Everyone had been right: Katya, Elena, her father. All of them had told her to never trust a British soldier. Yet she had done so – even more, she had given him her heart.

Her eyes started to burn, and she felt nauseous all of a sudden. Arvin Sloane prevented her from stumbling at the last moment.

"Milady, I am sorry... I didn't know that you were unaware of the circumstances. Jack told me..."

But Irina didn't listen to him anymore. She freed herself from him, turned around and hurried away from the dancing couples. Her vision became blurred when she fought her way through the people. She felt paralyzed. Jack had known the truth all along – maybe even since the beginning. Her mind even went so far as to assume that their first meeting in the woods had not been a coincidence. Everything had been a lie. Tears filled her eyes, although she tried desperately to maintain her countenance.

"Irina!"

She stopped and saw Jack coming towards her. The smile on his face faded when he looked into her eyes and saw the tears standing there. Concerned, he handed her a white handkerchief. "Are you alright?"

The shock almost paralyzed him when she slapped the white cloth out of his hand, the expression in her eyes now changing to hate and rage.

"Don't you ever talk to me again!" she hissed, turned around and rushed passed a group of young women, which were eyeing them obviously curious, out of the hall. Jack stared after her, apologized absently to a man who had just moved towards him to engage him in a conversation, and followed Irina quickly. The corridors of the palace suddenly became unbearably long to him. Her behavior was a puzzle to him. What had happened that she was that upset?

Finally, he reached Irina's room. Trying the handle, he found the door locked.

"Irina..." Jack asked loudly, since he was the only person in the corridor at the moment. No answer. "Irina, open the door." He waited for another twenty seconds, but when there was still no sign that Irina was going to comply with his wish, he became slightly irritated. "Open the door." His request was sharper now, accompanied with a knock at the door.

Finally he heard the lock being disengaged and the door opened. Irina looked at him, knowing that a scene on the floor would only ignite rumors among the nobility. She pulled Jack inside and slammed the door shut, her eyes blazing with anger and deep hurt.

"Let me make this clear, Lord Bristow." She hissed coldly with a good amount of sarcasm in her voice. "You can no longer consider me your wife, you damned English bastard."

Jack stared at her open-mouthed, totally unprepared for her hostile attack, before anger waved over him.

"Irina, have you lost your mind?" He asked, grabbing her wrist.

"Yes!" she snapped back. "I have lost my mind, otherwise I would have never trusted you. When did you plan to tell me about your involvement with the raid on our house?"

Jack gave a deep sigh, letting go of Irina's hand. "How did you..."

"So it is true." She murmured, almost indifferently. Deep inside she had still tried to convince herself that everything was just a big misunderstanding, that Jack had no idea about all of this. Only her eyes betrayed the deep pain she felt inside. "It is true, you knew all along." Her voice became a whisper, and she let herself sink onto her bed. "Oh god, how could I be so stupid..."

"Irina, I planned to tell you..." Jack explained softly and went to his knees in front of her. "I wanted to speak with you tonight after the party. I..."

"Don't you lie to me!" She pushed him away. "I hate you! I even defended you in front of my sister. I told her you were different from the men who raided our house... when actually you were one of them!" She pounced on him, desperately starting to pummel his chest and easing the rage and pain she felt inside a little. Jack tried to catch her wrists, but her deep sadness and her fury gave her immense power. When he realized that she was determined to seriously hurt him, he yelled at her to stop and listen to him, warning her to stop beating him, but she didn't even react. She seemed ready to kill.

Jack had never been violent against a woman, and especially he had never imagined being violent against Irina. But what happened during the next seconds was beyond his control. When her fist hit his face painfully, he saw his only chance to free himself from her attack by grabbing her and slamming her against the bed. Irina cried out when her back hit the hard wood painfully, the shock at Jack's strength standing in her wide eyes. When Jack moved towards her a little, she at first expected him to beat her and shielded her face with her hands, until she noticed the concern standing in his eyes – fear to have seriously hurt her. All she could do was stare at him. Slowly she regained her self-control. Jack was looking at her, his lip bleeding, while his hand felt for the swell.

Still totally stunned by her own reaction, Irina lifted her trembling hand, wanting to reach out and touch him, but the knowledge of who he was held her back. She felt the stitching pain in her back and stretched with a slight moan.

"Are you alright?" Jack asked concerned and crawled to her, wanting to help her up. "I am sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. I didn't want to hurt you, sweetheart."

Irina ignored his hand, and lifted without his assistance. "Please go." She then requested.

"Irina..."

"Damned bastard! Go." She snapped more emphatically, her head turning and her eyes boring into him. "I don't ever want to talk to you again!"

Irritation took over his concern. Yes, he had lied to her. And he surely hadn't wanted to hurt her. He had just wanted to make her stop her irrational attack. But she hadn't even given him the possibility to explain. Knowing that she would be outraged if she learned the truth, he had wanted to wait for the right moment. Whom had she heard the truth from?

"Maybe it's better to continue this conversation in the morning, when you are in a rational mood again." He said coldly. "Good night."

Without looking at her, he turned to leave the room, slamming the door shut soundly behind him. Only two seconds later, he heard the shattering sound of porcelain and prayed silently that Irina wouldn't destroy more than he was able to pay for.

Tears were standing in Irina's eyes as she looked at the closed door, then at the shattered vase on the ground right next to the door. No, she would not cry. Determined, she wiped the tears away with the back of her hand, only to have new tears form immediately in her eyes. She started to tremble.

The truth about what she had learned was so ironic that, if being in another situation, she would have simply laughed. Jack, the person she had trusted the most, was her worst enemy and belonged to the family her father had sworn to kill. Her father had never told his daughters the names of their mother's murderers, but more than once the sisters had witnessed him vowing that he was going to destroy that family as much as his own family had been destroyed.

Thinking about everything that had happened, the idea that Jack had planned all of this seemed a quite reasonable explanation. He had kissed her the first night that they had met. He had searched for her throughout the country. He had been the one posing as her fiancé in front of Cuvee, provoking their marriage. And it was he who had seduced her in the first place.

Craftily, he had gained her trust. And she had acted like a naive girl and fallen in love with him. Despite everything she knew, everything her father and sisters had told her, she had given in to Jack. Part of her had wanted to believe in his love. But as she thought about the situation now, it had been too perfect to be true. Jack had been too patient. He had been willing to do everything for her – he had even bared the constant insults of her sister. What was his plan? Had he just been using her to destroy the terrorist group?

"Oh wait," Irina murmured, clenching her hands to fists. "You are going to regret this, Jack Bristow. You will not play with me ever again..."

She stared at her hands, her vision becoming blurred. Hot tears fell down onto her dress, while deep inside she fought the desperate feeling of heartbreak. He had broken her. But she would not give up as defeated. Her hopes for a future with Jack were shattered, her female dream of the deep love that might be fulfilled, burst. All that she had left now was her rage – the rage she had felt all her life and that had kept her alive. She was sure it would rescue her again...