Note- anyone who wishes to call Lauren 'Laurie' may do so, Jack does after all, and sorry I haven't written since last summer, school sucks and took up all my writing time.

"Jacky remember that time we tied you to the top of my car and we drove down the side of the mountain at, like, ninety miles on hour?" Lauren, who now had pants on, asked Jack.

Red started laughing in disbelief.

"Red, Laurie was my main man a few years ago. He got me my first beer." Jack did a fake sniffle and wiped an invisible tear from his cheek. Red didn't look pleased.

"Oh man, remember that time we dyed the ice rink at the mall red with Jell-O powder? No one had any idea how it happened, and it was red for weeks." Jack and Lauren started cracking up.

As soon as he said that the doorbell rang, Hart and Mitchell stood at the door, with beer. I opened the door and looked at them with disgust. "Don't worry sweetheart we don't only supply drinks." Hart said. He was obviously already drunk.

"What?" I asked confused

He laughed and patted my butt as he walked in. I didn't want to cause a scene so I just ignored it.

"Beer!" All the boys yelled,disappointing their girlfriends.

Red and Bookworm sat on the bottom step of my staircase. "This is disgusting." Bookworm said aloud.

"They're acting like animals." Red replied as David sat down next to her.

We all looked at him. "I don't drink." He replied slightly embarrassed.

We nodded.

"Yeah!" all the boys yelled as Mush stripped off his T-shirt and slip-and-slidded down my kitchen floor with dish soap as his lubricant.

"Jack, your next!" Lauren yelled.

Jack stood, thinking as much as a drunk teenager could. "Pile up all the empty beer cans you can and I'm gonna ram 'um with my head!"

All the boys yelled in agreement. They piled up all the empty beer cans they could find, which were very abundant in my home. After they had built the tower, Jack ran, he slipped, and he slid. He did end up ramming all the beer cans, and making them fall all over the fall, but in the excitement, he forgot to stop himself and he slid headfirst into the kitchen island.

"Jack-man? You okay?" Lauren yelled stupidly, as the boys crowed around Jack and Lauren.

"Wait, everyone move away, my dads a doctor." Mush said while pushing his way through the crowd of boys.

"Doesn't your dad work Hooters?" Race asked.

"No, that's my mom," he answered quickly. He then tried to push up his sleeved and was surprised to find that they weren't there, since he wasn't wearing a shirt. "Okay, who stole my shirt while I wasn't looking?" Mush yelled, obviously agitated that his shirt was missing.

All the boys looked at each other waiting for someone to give him his shirt back.

"Just check him, man," A random boy said.

Mush went back to his patient. He cleared his throat and opened Jacks mouth. He looked inside and gagged at the smell of Jacks breath. He quickly closed Jacks mouth and moved to his ear. "JACK!" Much yelled in Jacks ear, Jack didn't move. Mush looked up sadly. "He's dead."

All the boys stood around sadly for a moment. No one was sure what to do.

"Wait, if we stay here we're going to be pinned for his murder and then they'll…" Lauren thought for a moment, "Chop off our heads!" this sent all the boys in panic mode.

They ran around the room like chickens with their heads cut off thinking of something to do. "I say we flee the country," Some boy suggested. "And head for Canada!" another boy added.

"To the Batmobile," Lauren rallied.

"You've got a Batmobile?" Some boy said astonished.

"No, but I have the keys to my mothers mini-van! Go!"

All the boys ran into the garage. To their surprise, the van was not there nor was the garage door opener.

Earlier that night

"I wonder what they'll do when they get bored here." Bookworm said bored herself.

Red spaced out, thinking of the horrible things that could happen to the boys if they left the house in their current state. She gasped, "we have to stop them from leaving. They'll die if we don't."

"What?" David asked.

"Never mind," she replied. "Here's the plan."

Red had David drive the van out of the garage, and Bookworm get the garage door opener and hide it. She had the front and back door barricaded, and made sure the security system would beep like crazy if any of the doors, leading to the outside world, had been opened.

Back to the story

By the time, the drunken boys figured out that there was no car in the garage David had locked the garage door, leading to the inside of the house, with all the boys in there. Red had figured they were safest in the garage.

I walked into my living room observing all the destruction that had been bestowed upon my home. I walked in to the kitchen and the first thing I noticed was an unconscience boy on the floor. "Umm, Red, you might want to see this." I yelled.

"Mary mother of Jesus!" She yelled.

"Christian Bale is in that movie," Bookworm exclaimed.

"Please stay focused," Red said exasperated.

Red dragged Jack to the living room and laid him on the couch. She had a wet washcloth to get all the soap off him, and was doing so when he woke up.

"Am I in Heaven?" he asked innocently. "Hell-o," Jack said once taking a look a Red.

"No," She replied angrily. "Now that you're awake, you're going in the room with all the other stupid boys."

"Are there strippers in there?" He questioned.

"What do you think about?" Red rhetorically asked herself.

She led Jack to the garage and locked him in.

In the garage

"Ahh, it's the undead!" Race screamed.

All the boys then tried to run from Jack, the undead/zombie, but it was a small garage. They soon realized he was a good undead/zombie. And changed his name to Neo, because Spot thought that if he were a zombie he would want his title to be 'Neo the Undead.'

Out of the garage

"Whose are theses?" Red asked holding up a pair of Ralf Lauren tighty-whities with one end of a spatula.

"Ewww," Bookworm added disgusted.

I looked at them for a moment. "Wait, there's a name sewn in. David?"

Red gasped. "Those are yours? Are you going commando?"

"No!" He yelled. "It's obvious someone has been stealing and wearing my underwear. Give those back." With that he snatched them off the spatula and went to put them in the backpack he brought with him.

"Okay," Red said turning back around to the slip and slide mess. "Trina, are you gonna clean this up?"

"I haven't decided yet." I replied.

Back in the Garage

"Neo the Undead," Lauren called.

"What?" Neo or Jack answered obviously annoyed.

"Tell us what the underworld is like." He said.

"If I must," Neo or Jack sighed. "Well, first there's undead registration, to see if you have what it takes to be undead. Naturally I got in right away."

"Do you have to pay to be undead?" Race asked.

Neo or Jack smirked. "Actually there was this majorly hot beer slut who was totally into and I didn't want to leave her all alone in the Underworld, so they had to pay me to become undead. Every minute I'm down here I'm making one hundred undead credits."

"Ohh," all the boys nodded in understanding. "Are there lots of beer sluts there?" Spot nonchalantly asked.

"Everywhere, man. And you should see these girls, their…"

Sorry about the many errors. It's late and I'm tired.

I hope you liked it.

Rachel