WOOT! I'm back! Thanks so much to all my reviewers! Especially everyone
who gave me ideas! I really couldn't keep this up without all of you
helping me!
To SilverDragon: XD I love that fic! Everyone that enjoys random comedy and doesn't mind a little . . . PG-ness (and I don't understand why you're reading this if you don't) should go read "The Adventures of Captain Obvious" by Megami Fairy!
Well today I'm goin to work off an idea sent in by SilverDragon: Hikaris and Yamis! Since there are only four spots for the show however, I have to skip doing one pair. And since I've only ever seen a picture of Yami Marik once, I'm going to use the ones I know best. Today's introductions will be each characters answer to the question: how do you feel about your Abiou.
Sam: hey, how come you use almost all of their ideas by barely any of mine?
Cpegasus: cause most of your ideas suck. That's why.
Sam: *pout* humph
Disclaimer:
Mokuba: Cpegasus does not own Yu-gi-oh, Kenshin, Who's Line, Fear Factor, most of her ideas, or anything except herself and Sam.
Sam: HEY!
Mokuba: I'm just reading what she told me to! *shows Sam a notecard in his hand*
Cpegasus: very good Mokuba, here ya go ^^ *gives him a lollypop just slightly larger than his head*
Sam: Hikari . . .
Cpegasus: ^^""" eep! That's all folks, enjoy the show! *runs away* *********************************************************
Welcome once again to Who's Line is it Anyway let's meet tonight's contestants!
First, "He's really awesome!" Yugi Moto!
*Yugi comes out. Fangirls scream. Yugi smiles, and sits down. *
Next up, "Well, he's a good kid, but he's a little naïve at times . . . " Yami Yugi!
*Yami walks on. More fangirls scream. SilverDragon fights to get out of her seat, but is held back by a penguin armed with a ray gun. SilverDragon sits down, looking warily at the penguin* (a/n: XD please don't ask about the penguins . . . I'll tell you later . . . )
Thirdly, "is 'pure evil' strong enough to describe him?" Ryou Bakura!
*Ryou comes out. Fangirls scream. He smiles and sits down, looking a little flustered at all his applause. This makes the fangirls scream more*
And finally, "Wimp. I'd kill him if I didn't need his body," Yami Bakura!
*Yami Bakura comes out to cheers from his fangirls and jeers from Ryou fangirls. He mockingly makes an elegant bow, sending several fangirls into hysteria, causing quite a few to faint, and making the rest scream even louder. Cpegasus is covering her ears to the noise. Sam presses a large button with a picture of a chicken on it. Loud clucking fills the room, silencing everyone*
Cpegasus: whew, thanks. I'm your host Cpegasus; come on down and let's have some fun!
*Cpegasus runs to her comfy chair*
Cpegasus: welcome once again to Who's Line is it Anyway, the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter!
Sam: that's right, the points are like the message on videos that tell you the film has been reformatted to fit your screen, they don't matter!
Cpegasus: tonight's first game is Weird Newscasters! Yami, you're our news anchor. Bakura's your co-anchor, and he's a mime.
Bakura: remind me why I submitted to this torture?
Cpegasus: because I'm not beating you up right now for hurting Pegasus! That's why!
Bakura: -_-' fine . . .
Sam: Yugi, you're our weatherman, and you're an arachnophobic (sp) who keeps seeing spiders everywhere.
Yugi: beautiful.
Cpegasus: and Ryou, you're doing sports as Kenshin Himura! *Light laughter from those who watch Kenshin*
Sam: that should be interesting.
Bakura: 'should be' doesn't mean 'is'
Ryou: *realizing that he is surrounded by armed Rabid Fangirls* you just shut up.
Bakura: *threateningly starts to walk towards Ryou* *soft and dangerous* what was that?
Ryou: *gulps* nothing Sir.
Bakura: that's what I thought.
Ryou Fangirls: *start throwing rocks and garbage at Bakura*
Bakura: *ducks*
Bakura Fangirls: *start throwing rocks and garbage at Ryou Fangirls*
All Fangirls: *turn into giant dust-cloud fight*
Cpegasus: *sweatdrop* so Yami, start when you hear the music.
Yami Fangirls' Spokesperson: SHUT UP! YAMI'S STARTING!
All Fangirls: *speed back to their seats to watch the show. A halo appears over each of their heads*
Sam: . . . okaaaaaaaay then . . .
SFX: *news music*
Yami: hello there, I'm God. *laughter from those who know that Pharaohs were actually considered gods, scorn from those who don't and are angry that Cpegasus would bring religion into her fic* Today's news, an idiot Tomb-Robber was caught trying to break into my treasure vault today, he was publicly tortured.
Bakura: *growls*
Yami: and now I turn things over to my co-anchor, Idiot. *laughter from Yami and Ryou fangirls, shouting and jeers from Bakura fangirls* Idiot? What's happening?
Cpegasus: you're having WAY too much fun with this.
Yami: I know ^_^
Bakura: *growls, then does mime gestures for being stuck in a box*
Yami: lovely. And now, it's time for the weather with Yugi. Can we expect clear skies tonight?
Sam: *raises an eyebrow* this really doesn't sound like Yami somehow . . .
Cpegasus: *shrug* what're ya gonna do?
Yugi: Well God, tonight we should see mostly clear skies with a high of - AAAAHHHH! SPIDER! SPIDER RIGHT THERE! RIGHT THERE! *points at a random spot on the ground that very obviously doesn't have a spider* GET IT AWAY GET IT AWAY GET IT AWAAY!!
Yami: so, there's your weather, high of spider.
Yugi: WHERE!?
Yami: and finally, sports with Himura Kenshin.
Ryou: ^^ thank you God. Today the Cardinals defeated the Yankees at their home game, that they did. ^^ The football scores were - *breaks off and pretends to be swordfighting with someone. When he's finished, he looks at the audience* ^^" . . . oro?
Yami: . . . right. Well that looks like all for tonight, tune in again. I command you!
SFX: buzzzzzzz
Sam: . . . that was pointless.
Cpegasus: isn't this all? Alright, 100 points to Yugi and 70 to Ryou.
Yami and Bakura fangirls: HEY!
Cpegasus: *cringe* and 2 each for Yami and Bakura.
Yami and Bakura fangirls: HEY!!
Sam: we gave them points, you can't complain.
Yami and Bakura fangirls: aw . . .
Cpegasus: our next game is Scenes from a Hat! And unless you all have an IQ lower than a potato, you know how it works by now.
Some Random Person in the Audience: how does it work?
Rest of audience: *sweatdrop*
Sam: . . . right. *holds up a very large Witch's hat and pulls out a piece of paper* tonight's first topic is: how to get fired from your job.
Yugi: oh, you wanted that done TODAY? I'm sorry, I thought you meant NEXT year!
Bakura: give me a raise or I kill you.
Ryou: oh, I'm sorry sir, I didn't hear that ultra-important announcement, I was playing Pokemon!
Audience: *collective shudder* the ultimate evil
Cpegasus: *sweatdrop* shut up.
Yugi: *drags Yami up with him*
Yami: *pretends to drink something*
Yugi: what are you doing?
Yami: . . . drinking my Pepsi?
Yugi: this is the Coke factory. *laughter*
Sam: What Santa does when it's not Christmas (thanks to The-Fiend-Tamer)
Ryou: *holding hands up like binoculars* man, spying on little kids is HARD!
Yugi: *holds arm out and makes the motion for clicking a remote control* ALRIGHT! Celebrity Fear Factor! My favorite!
Bakura: F*&%ING LITTLE KIDS! I HATE THEM SO MUCH! *laughter*
Sam: *pulls a paper* *gulp* oh dear lord . . . reasons why Pegasus rules.
Yugi: O.O'
Bakura: I suppose having an item for me to steal is a good thing . . .
Yami: you are NOT making me answer that
Ryou: . . . I don't know you guys . . . er . . . he DID kind of invent the game Yami solves all his problems with . . .
CPegasus: THANK YOU RYOU!!!!!! In addition to creating the game, he's also smart and funny and sweet and caring and a really awesome artist and . . .
Yami: Yugi?
Yugi: yes?
Yami: what would you do if I had to kill myself due to the rant of an insane fangirl?
Yugi: something drastic, I'm sure.
Yami: damn.
CPegasus: *keeps ranting*
Sam: Hikari?
CPegasus: *gibbering madly*
Sam: Hikari?
CPegasus: ^_____________^
Sam: CPEGASUS! BACK TO EARTH IF YOU DON'T MIND!
CPegasus: you're no fun, you know that?
Sam: *sigh* next topic: Scenes that would make . . . *trails off and stops*
CPegasus: what does it say?
Sam: *gulp* scenes that would make the authoress mad
CPegasus: 0.0 *gulp*
Sam: *thinking quickly, presses the buzzer to end game* that's enough!
CPegasus: 100 points to Ryou. *whew* well it's time for a commercial break now, but we'll be right back!
(A commercial, stolen from Sheep in the Big City)
*we see a guy standing in front of a bunch of barking dogs*
Guy: hello, I'm Bob, and I'm running for the position of city dogcatcher. I believe I am the best candidate for the job, as my opponent is a ham sandwich.
*shot of a ham sandwich*
Ham Sandwich: I am not a ham sandwich, I am a sandwich made from turkey, cheese, balonga (sp), and yes, a little bit of ham.
*Back to Bob*
Bob: as you can clearly see, my opponent is indeed a Ham Sandwich. So vote for me for City Dogcatcher.
Disclaimer Voice: paid for by the Bob is not a Ham Sandwich committee
(and now, back to our regularly scheduled nonsense)
CPegasus: welcome back to Who's Line is it Anyway, the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter!
Sam: that's right, the points are really a lot like Funny Bunny, they really don't matter.
Kaiba: *in audience* thank god one of them has sense!
CPegasus: *halfhearted death glare at Sam, and a full on death glare at Kaiba* our next game is Questions Only! Yugi and Ryou, we're gonna give you a scene to act out completely in questions. If one of you says anything that isn't a question, you're replaced by Yami. The next person to get out is replaced by Bakura. Then Ryou, then Yugi, and back around until I call time.
Sam: you're scene is: you're at auditions for the school play. And start!
Ryou: are you trying out too?
Yugi: what does it look like I'm doing here?
Ryou: what play is it?
Yugi: didn't you see all the signs around school?
Ryou: well did you?
Yugi: . . . yes *buzz*
*Yugi sits down and Yami comes up in his place*
Yami: what part do you want?
Ryou: why?
Yami: do you want the same part as me?
Ryou: how could I know that if I don't know what you want?
Yami: don't you know what I want?
Ryou: what part did you want?
Yami: why don't you know?
Ryou: should I?
Yami: can't you read minds or something?
Ryou: and I can do that if you can't?
Yami: . . . aw *&%# this. *buzz*
CPegasus: I'm sorry, that is not a question.
*Yami sits down and Bakura stands up*
Bakura: what the hell am I doing here?
Ryou: don't you know?
Bakura: well do you?
Ryou: shouldn't you know why you're here?
Bakura: didn't I ask you that?
Ryou: should I know why you're here if you don't?
Bakura: YES! YES YOU SHOULD! *buzz*
CPegasus: that's not a question either.
*Bakura sits down and Yugi comes back up*
Yugi: didn't I see you here before?
Ryou: do you have déjà vu or something? *laughter*
Yugi: . . . dammit he's too good! *Buzz*
Sam: and let's leave it there.
CPegasus: whoa! Go Ryou! *Ryou fangirls cheer*
Sam: 1000 points to Ryou and that's final! *glares at Bakura, Yugi and Yami fangirls who are about to start protesting. They stop*
CPegasus: I forget what our next game is called so I'll call it commercial! I have here a large cardboard box filled with all kinds of random things. Yami and Bakura have to make up an infomercial using as many items from the box as they can. Now, I need something for them to sell.
Audience: music video! Bicycle!
The Only Non-Fangirl Member of the Audience: fangirl repellent!
CPegasus: oh I like that one!
Sam: okay you two, you're selling Fangirl Repellent with these items now start!
Yami: has this ever happened to you?
*Bakura is standing in the middle of the stage, where he is attacked by rabid Bakura Fangirls*
Yami: then you need this unique Fangirl Repellent! *CPegasus sends Bakura fangirls back to their seats* With only a few common household items, you can keep the fangirls away! *reaches into the box and pulls out a rubber chicken* *stares at it* . . . um . . .
Bakura: gimme that you stupid Pharaoh. *grabs the chicken away from Yami and faces the camera* now the trick with this rubber chicken is that women - as a general rule - don't like dead chickens. So you hold this in front of their face and say, "hey, look at this dead chicken!" they'll run away screaming every time and never bother you again. *laughter*
Yami: *mutters* show-off
Bakura: *reaches into the box and grabs a ball of yarn* . . .
Yami: *grabs it* now fangirls are a lot like cats. In fact, in rare instances, you'll find one who turns into a half-cat half-human creature on a regular basis. *using the all-powerful Millennium Puzzle, which has every possible power he'll ever need as a convenient plot point, Yami brings Botan (from Yu Yu Hakusho) to the stage*
Botan: *blink blink*
Yami: *hands her the yarn*
Botan: *immediately becomes cat-like and starts playing with the yarn* meow! ^.^
Yami: on these occasions, a ball of yarn is the perfect distraction while you run for your life. *laughter*
Botan: *still a cat* can I keep this?
CPegasus: yes.
Botan: =^.^= *disappears*
Yami: *grabs a blank CD from the box*
Bakura: our next item is a blank CD. You put on this CD recordings of you singing terribly *coughPharaohcough* you then play this CD at your approaching fangirl, and they should choose a new topic of interest quickly. But make sure not to let this fall into the wrong hands: it could be a powerful blackmail weapon *laughter as Yami grabs the CD back from Bakura and pockets it. He then grabs a cell phone from the box*
Yami: this is your ultimate weapon of destruction: the fangirl's phone. What you do is you booby-trap the phone so all it does is play a recording of your voice. It doesn't matter what you say, you can insult them and it'll still work. This way, whenever the fangirl tries to use her phone, she faints with happiness at hearing your voice, rendering her harmless. *laughter*
*buzzz*
Sam: and that's a wrap.
CPegasus: XD nice job guys. 500 points each.
Sam: and now it's time for a commercial break! We'll be back with the winner right after this!
(A commercial)
CPegasus: welcome back to the show! Tonight's winner is Ryou Bakura! *Ryou sits in the comfy chair, surrounded by fangirls and looking a bit nervous*
Sam: our last game is Party Quirks! CPegasus is hosting a party, and the other three are her guests. The catch is-
Audience: we know already!
Sam: oh. alright, go ahead and start.
CPegasus: *mimes setting up for a party* wow, this'll be one cool party for the chess club! *laughter*
SFX: ding-dong
*CPegasus opens the door to see Yami there*
Yami: *sugar-high person* HI! I want sugar! Sugarsugarsugarsugarsugar!!!!!!!
CPegasus: . . .
Yami: *walks inside the 'door' and starts jumping around*
SFX: ding-dong
*CPegasus opens the door again, this time to Yugi*
Yugi: *Kaiba* Joey's a dog. Yugi stinks and shouldn't have beaten me. I hate Pegasus
CPegasus: EW! Go away Kaiba! *buzz* *Yugi sits down*
Yami: SSSSSUUUUUGGGGGAAAARRR!!!!!
SFX: ding-dong. Ding-dong. Ding-dong-ding-dong-ding-
CPegasus: I'M COMING ALREADY!
*CPegasus opens the door to see Bakura*
Bakura: *fangirl* OOH! My bishie! *jumps around, though you can tell he's disgusted with himself* my bishie!
CPegasus: *to Yami* hey sugar-high guy, did you invite the crazed fangirl? *buzz* *buzz* *Bakura and Yami sit down. Sam presses the big buzzer to end the game*
Sam: good job hikari.
CPegasus: ^^ thanks! That's our show, see you again!
***
A/n: thanks again to everyone who sent me ideas. Special thanks to Bakurakrazie; who gave me the quirks for Party Quirks!
Now, it's time to shamelessly advertise!
First, if you are a humor person, read "Typical" and "There's Nothing on TV! ARGH!" both by jeti. Then go to fictionpress.net (or is it .com? I have no idea . . .) and read "The Story of Small Little Princess Girl," and "Randomnesses! Run Away!" also both by jeti! Then you can come back to ff.net and find "They're Coming to Take Me Away, Ha Ha!" by Serendipity.
If you prefer more serious fiction, then read "Suzanne and Alfonze" by jeti on fictionpress. And if you think you can stand my fangirl gibberish, I beg you to read and review for my big long Mary-Sue fic, "Who Ever Said Love Was Easy?" parts 1 and 2 finished, part 3 in the process of going up, part 4 and a background to come! It's well-written! I swear!
To SilverDragon: XD I love that fic! Everyone that enjoys random comedy and doesn't mind a little . . . PG-ness (and I don't understand why you're reading this if you don't) should go read "The Adventures of Captain Obvious" by Megami Fairy!
Well today I'm goin to work off an idea sent in by SilverDragon: Hikaris and Yamis! Since there are only four spots for the show however, I have to skip doing one pair. And since I've only ever seen a picture of Yami Marik once, I'm going to use the ones I know best. Today's introductions will be each characters answer to the question: how do you feel about your Abiou.
Sam: hey, how come you use almost all of their ideas by barely any of mine?
Cpegasus: cause most of your ideas suck. That's why.
Sam: *pout* humph
Disclaimer:
Mokuba: Cpegasus does not own Yu-gi-oh, Kenshin, Who's Line, Fear Factor, most of her ideas, or anything except herself and Sam.
Sam: HEY!
Mokuba: I'm just reading what she told me to! *shows Sam a notecard in his hand*
Cpegasus: very good Mokuba, here ya go ^^ *gives him a lollypop just slightly larger than his head*
Sam: Hikari . . .
Cpegasus: ^^""" eep! That's all folks, enjoy the show! *runs away* *********************************************************
Welcome once again to Who's Line is it Anyway let's meet tonight's contestants!
First, "He's really awesome!" Yugi Moto!
*Yugi comes out. Fangirls scream. Yugi smiles, and sits down. *
Next up, "Well, he's a good kid, but he's a little naïve at times . . . " Yami Yugi!
*Yami walks on. More fangirls scream. SilverDragon fights to get out of her seat, but is held back by a penguin armed with a ray gun. SilverDragon sits down, looking warily at the penguin* (a/n: XD please don't ask about the penguins . . . I'll tell you later . . . )
Thirdly, "is 'pure evil' strong enough to describe him?" Ryou Bakura!
*Ryou comes out. Fangirls scream. He smiles and sits down, looking a little flustered at all his applause. This makes the fangirls scream more*
And finally, "Wimp. I'd kill him if I didn't need his body," Yami Bakura!
*Yami Bakura comes out to cheers from his fangirls and jeers from Ryou fangirls. He mockingly makes an elegant bow, sending several fangirls into hysteria, causing quite a few to faint, and making the rest scream even louder. Cpegasus is covering her ears to the noise. Sam presses a large button with a picture of a chicken on it. Loud clucking fills the room, silencing everyone*
Cpegasus: whew, thanks. I'm your host Cpegasus; come on down and let's have some fun!
*Cpegasus runs to her comfy chair*
Cpegasus: welcome once again to Who's Line is it Anyway, the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter!
Sam: that's right, the points are like the message on videos that tell you the film has been reformatted to fit your screen, they don't matter!
Cpegasus: tonight's first game is Weird Newscasters! Yami, you're our news anchor. Bakura's your co-anchor, and he's a mime.
Bakura: remind me why I submitted to this torture?
Cpegasus: because I'm not beating you up right now for hurting Pegasus! That's why!
Bakura: -_-' fine . . .
Sam: Yugi, you're our weatherman, and you're an arachnophobic (sp) who keeps seeing spiders everywhere.
Yugi: beautiful.
Cpegasus: and Ryou, you're doing sports as Kenshin Himura! *Light laughter from those who watch Kenshin*
Sam: that should be interesting.
Bakura: 'should be' doesn't mean 'is'
Ryou: *realizing that he is surrounded by armed Rabid Fangirls* you just shut up.
Bakura: *threateningly starts to walk towards Ryou* *soft and dangerous* what was that?
Ryou: *gulps* nothing Sir.
Bakura: that's what I thought.
Ryou Fangirls: *start throwing rocks and garbage at Bakura*
Bakura: *ducks*
Bakura Fangirls: *start throwing rocks and garbage at Ryou Fangirls*
All Fangirls: *turn into giant dust-cloud fight*
Cpegasus: *sweatdrop* so Yami, start when you hear the music.
Yami Fangirls' Spokesperson: SHUT UP! YAMI'S STARTING!
All Fangirls: *speed back to their seats to watch the show. A halo appears over each of their heads*
Sam: . . . okaaaaaaaay then . . .
SFX: *news music*
Yami: hello there, I'm God. *laughter from those who know that Pharaohs were actually considered gods, scorn from those who don't and are angry that Cpegasus would bring religion into her fic* Today's news, an idiot Tomb-Robber was caught trying to break into my treasure vault today, he was publicly tortured.
Bakura: *growls*
Yami: and now I turn things over to my co-anchor, Idiot. *laughter from Yami and Ryou fangirls, shouting and jeers from Bakura fangirls* Idiot? What's happening?
Cpegasus: you're having WAY too much fun with this.
Yami: I know ^_^
Bakura: *growls, then does mime gestures for being stuck in a box*
Yami: lovely. And now, it's time for the weather with Yugi. Can we expect clear skies tonight?
Sam: *raises an eyebrow* this really doesn't sound like Yami somehow . . .
Cpegasus: *shrug* what're ya gonna do?
Yugi: Well God, tonight we should see mostly clear skies with a high of - AAAAHHHH! SPIDER! SPIDER RIGHT THERE! RIGHT THERE! *points at a random spot on the ground that very obviously doesn't have a spider* GET IT AWAY GET IT AWAY GET IT AWAAY!!
Yami: so, there's your weather, high of spider.
Yugi: WHERE!?
Yami: and finally, sports with Himura Kenshin.
Ryou: ^^ thank you God. Today the Cardinals defeated the Yankees at their home game, that they did. ^^ The football scores were - *breaks off and pretends to be swordfighting with someone. When he's finished, he looks at the audience* ^^" . . . oro?
Yami: . . . right. Well that looks like all for tonight, tune in again. I command you!
SFX: buzzzzzzz
Sam: . . . that was pointless.
Cpegasus: isn't this all? Alright, 100 points to Yugi and 70 to Ryou.
Yami and Bakura fangirls: HEY!
Cpegasus: *cringe* and 2 each for Yami and Bakura.
Yami and Bakura fangirls: HEY!!
Sam: we gave them points, you can't complain.
Yami and Bakura fangirls: aw . . .
Cpegasus: our next game is Scenes from a Hat! And unless you all have an IQ lower than a potato, you know how it works by now.
Some Random Person in the Audience: how does it work?
Rest of audience: *sweatdrop*
Sam: . . . right. *holds up a very large Witch's hat and pulls out a piece of paper* tonight's first topic is: how to get fired from your job.
Yugi: oh, you wanted that done TODAY? I'm sorry, I thought you meant NEXT year!
Bakura: give me a raise or I kill you.
Ryou: oh, I'm sorry sir, I didn't hear that ultra-important announcement, I was playing Pokemon!
Audience: *collective shudder* the ultimate evil
Cpegasus: *sweatdrop* shut up.
Yugi: *drags Yami up with him*
Yami: *pretends to drink something*
Yugi: what are you doing?
Yami: . . . drinking my Pepsi?
Yugi: this is the Coke factory. *laughter*
Sam: What Santa does when it's not Christmas (thanks to The-Fiend-Tamer)
Ryou: *holding hands up like binoculars* man, spying on little kids is HARD!
Yugi: *holds arm out and makes the motion for clicking a remote control* ALRIGHT! Celebrity Fear Factor! My favorite!
Bakura: F*&%ING LITTLE KIDS! I HATE THEM SO MUCH! *laughter*
Sam: *pulls a paper* *gulp* oh dear lord . . . reasons why Pegasus rules.
Yugi: O.O'
Bakura: I suppose having an item for me to steal is a good thing . . .
Yami: you are NOT making me answer that
Ryou: . . . I don't know you guys . . . er . . . he DID kind of invent the game Yami solves all his problems with . . .
CPegasus: THANK YOU RYOU!!!!!! In addition to creating the game, he's also smart and funny and sweet and caring and a really awesome artist and . . .
Yami: Yugi?
Yugi: yes?
Yami: what would you do if I had to kill myself due to the rant of an insane fangirl?
Yugi: something drastic, I'm sure.
Yami: damn.
CPegasus: *keeps ranting*
Sam: Hikari?
CPegasus: *gibbering madly*
Sam: Hikari?
CPegasus: ^_____________^
Sam: CPEGASUS! BACK TO EARTH IF YOU DON'T MIND!
CPegasus: you're no fun, you know that?
Sam: *sigh* next topic: Scenes that would make . . . *trails off and stops*
CPegasus: what does it say?
Sam: *gulp* scenes that would make the authoress mad
CPegasus: 0.0 *gulp*
Sam: *thinking quickly, presses the buzzer to end game* that's enough!
CPegasus: 100 points to Ryou. *whew* well it's time for a commercial break now, but we'll be right back!
(A commercial, stolen from Sheep in the Big City)
*we see a guy standing in front of a bunch of barking dogs*
Guy: hello, I'm Bob, and I'm running for the position of city dogcatcher. I believe I am the best candidate for the job, as my opponent is a ham sandwich.
*shot of a ham sandwich*
Ham Sandwich: I am not a ham sandwich, I am a sandwich made from turkey, cheese, balonga (sp), and yes, a little bit of ham.
*Back to Bob*
Bob: as you can clearly see, my opponent is indeed a Ham Sandwich. So vote for me for City Dogcatcher.
Disclaimer Voice: paid for by the Bob is not a Ham Sandwich committee
(and now, back to our regularly scheduled nonsense)
CPegasus: welcome back to Who's Line is it Anyway, the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter!
Sam: that's right, the points are really a lot like Funny Bunny, they really don't matter.
Kaiba: *in audience* thank god one of them has sense!
CPegasus: *halfhearted death glare at Sam, and a full on death glare at Kaiba* our next game is Questions Only! Yugi and Ryou, we're gonna give you a scene to act out completely in questions. If one of you says anything that isn't a question, you're replaced by Yami. The next person to get out is replaced by Bakura. Then Ryou, then Yugi, and back around until I call time.
Sam: you're scene is: you're at auditions for the school play. And start!
Ryou: are you trying out too?
Yugi: what does it look like I'm doing here?
Ryou: what play is it?
Yugi: didn't you see all the signs around school?
Ryou: well did you?
Yugi: . . . yes *buzz*
*Yugi sits down and Yami comes up in his place*
Yami: what part do you want?
Ryou: why?
Yami: do you want the same part as me?
Ryou: how could I know that if I don't know what you want?
Yami: don't you know what I want?
Ryou: what part did you want?
Yami: why don't you know?
Ryou: should I?
Yami: can't you read minds or something?
Ryou: and I can do that if you can't?
Yami: . . . aw *&%# this. *buzz*
CPegasus: I'm sorry, that is not a question.
*Yami sits down and Bakura stands up*
Bakura: what the hell am I doing here?
Ryou: don't you know?
Bakura: well do you?
Ryou: shouldn't you know why you're here?
Bakura: didn't I ask you that?
Ryou: should I know why you're here if you don't?
Bakura: YES! YES YOU SHOULD! *buzz*
CPegasus: that's not a question either.
*Bakura sits down and Yugi comes back up*
Yugi: didn't I see you here before?
Ryou: do you have déjà vu or something? *laughter*
Yugi: . . . dammit he's too good! *Buzz*
Sam: and let's leave it there.
CPegasus: whoa! Go Ryou! *Ryou fangirls cheer*
Sam: 1000 points to Ryou and that's final! *glares at Bakura, Yugi and Yami fangirls who are about to start protesting. They stop*
CPegasus: I forget what our next game is called so I'll call it commercial! I have here a large cardboard box filled with all kinds of random things. Yami and Bakura have to make up an infomercial using as many items from the box as they can. Now, I need something for them to sell.
Audience: music video! Bicycle!
The Only Non-Fangirl Member of the Audience: fangirl repellent!
CPegasus: oh I like that one!
Sam: okay you two, you're selling Fangirl Repellent with these items now start!
Yami: has this ever happened to you?
*Bakura is standing in the middle of the stage, where he is attacked by rabid Bakura Fangirls*
Yami: then you need this unique Fangirl Repellent! *CPegasus sends Bakura fangirls back to their seats* With only a few common household items, you can keep the fangirls away! *reaches into the box and pulls out a rubber chicken* *stares at it* . . . um . . .
Bakura: gimme that you stupid Pharaoh. *grabs the chicken away from Yami and faces the camera* now the trick with this rubber chicken is that women - as a general rule - don't like dead chickens. So you hold this in front of their face and say, "hey, look at this dead chicken!" they'll run away screaming every time and never bother you again. *laughter*
Yami: *mutters* show-off
Bakura: *reaches into the box and grabs a ball of yarn* . . .
Yami: *grabs it* now fangirls are a lot like cats. In fact, in rare instances, you'll find one who turns into a half-cat half-human creature on a regular basis. *using the all-powerful Millennium Puzzle, which has every possible power he'll ever need as a convenient plot point, Yami brings Botan (from Yu Yu Hakusho) to the stage*
Botan: *blink blink*
Yami: *hands her the yarn*
Botan: *immediately becomes cat-like and starts playing with the yarn* meow! ^.^
Yami: on these occasions, a ball of yarn is the perfect distraction while you run for your life. *laughter*
Botan: *still a cat* can I keep this?
CPegasus: yes.
Botan: =^.^= *disappears*
Yami: *grabs a blank CD from the box*
Bakura: our next item is a blank CD. You put on this CD recordings of you singing terribly *coughPharaohcough* you then play this CD at your approaching fangirl, and they should choose a new topic of interest quickly. But make sure not to let this fall into the wrong hands: it could be a powerful blackmail weapon *laughter as Yami grabs the CD back from Bakura and pockets it. He then grabs a cell phone from the box*
Yami: this is your ultimate weapon of destruction: the fangirl's phone. What you do is you booby-trap the phone so all it does is play a recording of your voice. It doesn't matter what you say, you can insult them and it'll still work. This way, whenever the fangirl tries to use her phone, she faints with happiness at hearing your voice, rendering her harmless. *laughter*
*buzzz*
Sam: and that's a wrap.
CPegasus: XD nice job guys. 500 points each.
Sam: and now it's time for a commercial break! We'll be back with the winner right after this!
(A commercial)
CPegasus: welcome back to the show! Tonight's winner is Ryou Bakura! *Ryou sits in the comfy chair, surrounded by fangirls and looking a bit nervous*
Sam: our last game is Party Quirks! CPegasus is hosting a party, and the other three are her guests. The catch is-
Audience: we know already!
Sam: oh. alright, go ahead and start.
CPegasus: *mimes setting up for a party* wow, this'll be one cool party for the chess club! *laughter*
SFX: ding-dong
*CPegasus opens the door to see Yami there*
Yami: *sugar-high person* HI! I want sugar! Sugarsugarsugarsugarsugar!!!!!!!
CPegasus: . . .
Yami: *walks inside the 'door' and starts jumping around*
SFX: ding-dong
*CPegasus opens the door again, this time to Yugi*
Yugi: *Kaiba* Joey's a dog. Yugi stinks and shouldn't have beaten me. I hate Pegasus
CPegasus: EW! Go away Kaiba! *buzz* *Yugi sits down*
Yami: SSSSSUUUUUGGGGGAAAARRR!!!!!
SFX: ding-dong. Ding-dong. Ding-dong-ding-dong-ding-
CPegasus: I'M COMING ALREADY!
*CPegasus opens the door to see Bakura*
Bakura: *fangirl* OOH! My bishie! *jumps around, though you can tell he's disgusted with himself* my bishie!
CPegasus: *to Yami* hey sugar-high guy, did you invite the crazed fangirl? *buzz* *buzz* *Bakura and Yami sit down. Sam presses the big buzzer to end the game*
Sam: good job hikari.
CPegasus: ^^ thanks! That's our show, see you again!
***
A/n: thanks again to everyone who sent me ideas. Special thanks to Bakurakrazie; who gave me the quirks for Party Quirks!
Now, it's time to shamelessly advertise!
First, if you are a humor person, read "Typical" and "There's Nothing on TV! ARGH!" both by jeti. Then go to fictionpress.net (or is it .com? I have no idea . . .) and read "The Story of Small Little Princess Girl," and "Randomnesses! Run Away!" also both by jeti! Then you can come back to ff.net and find "They're Coming to Take Me Away, Ha Ha!" by Serendipity.
If you prefer more serious fiction, then read "Suzanne and Alfonze" by jeti on fictionpress. And if you think you can stand my fangirl gibberish, I beg you to read and review for my big long Mary-Sue fic, "Who Ever Said Love Was Easy?" parts 1 and 2 finished, part 3 in the process of going up, part 4 and a background to come! It's well-written! I swear!