Game Day
Disclaimer I don't own Hellsing or anything for that matter.
It was another boring day at the ole hellsing manor. The wind blew steadily through the trees and covered up the screams from within. Just outside Sir Integra's office a young blonde vampiress stood listening to arguing inside.
Seras: Uh, master what was all that noise?
Alucard: Uh, nothing police girl don't trouble yourself.
Seras: I heard you screaming, kinda like a girl. Kinda like the time we found that porcelain doll at the bottom of the well.
ICNH: I would tell you to see the story operation payback, but that doesn't exist anymore due to some anonymous whistle blower. I see you! I see you! Don't think I don't see! Your out there laughing and lying!
Seras: soooooo what's up.
Alucard: Nothing damn it! I don't have to take this I don't know you people I'm going home!
Seras decided to walk into Integra's office to find out for herself. Inside Integra sat behind her desk riffling though paper work (as every fanfic writer knows this is all she does).
Integra: Good, it's you police girl. Needed to speak to you.
Seras: Sir, what is it?
Integra: As you know we have a standing war with those Iscariots. And if you look in the sixth manga it seems that Mr. Hirano is pissing off real Catholics like ICNH by making the KKK part of the Vatican.
Seras: (sarcastically) No shit, really?
Integra: What'd you say!
Seras: Uh I said that you should sit cause I knew a bear named Willy?
Integra: Oh so did I. So any way we're going to finish this conflict once and for all.
Seras: In a brutal blood bath of violence and gore that would make even the creators of Silent hill vomit in disgust.
Integra: No, no that's for Christmas, we'll be doing a game day. Yes a day full of events. Baseball, video games, street hockey, foot ball, magic the gathering, karaoke, and that weird little triangle and golf tee game they have at some restaurants.
Seras: Uh, no offense but why?
Integra: Damn it Seras! You just can't see the big picture, I finally get revenge on Alucard by humiliating him for that crap he pulled on me ten years ago.
Col. Sanders (Alucard's hand puppet also from operation payback) comes in and takes us back ten years to a happier time. A time where Alucard has just woken up and Integra has nearly avoided a gruesome death. A time where you can still smell the rot of the various hit men working under Sir Richard.
A young Integra looks frantically through a box of cocoa puffs.
Integra: Damn it where the hell is it?
Alucard: Hey master, look at my new official police badge!
Alucard has a glow in the dark badge pinned to his jacket. He pretends to talk into a walky-talky.
Alucard: Calling all cars calling all cars come out with your hands up!
Integra: Hey that's my official police badge give me it Alucard!
Alucard: That's officer Alucard to you.
(present)
Alucard: What! Your still mad about that.
Integra: It was my police badge and you broke it!
Seras: You guys have some seriously deep seated issues that need some heavy therapy.
Integra & Alucard: SHUT UP POLICE GIRL!