Falling Away

chapter fifteen: darling, you've grown tired of me

A/N: Thanks for all of your reviews. Appreciate it.

Oh, and you know, I'm totally going to Hell.

I turn 14 on the 28th!

Merry Christmas!

---

"Um, hello? Is anyone there?"

Mia literally felt as if she couldn't breathe. The voice on the other end was a pretty, girlish voice with the slightest French accent that sounded as if it belonged to a supermodel, or someone who had the looks of Heidi Klum at least. She sounded young, maybe nineteen or twenty. "Hello?…Bonjour? I know someone's there. I can hear you breathing." Speak…no, don't speak, hang up, damn it!…HANG UP!…

"Erm, hello," Mia managed to say, the phone held tightly to her ear, her lips practically kissing the mouthpiece. "Is Adam…I mean, can I…" Mia stopped speaking, her eyes wide. She didn't know what to say.

"Can you what?" the supermodel with the light French accent said in a somewhat bored voice.

"Is Adam there? Can I speak to him?" Mia said, breathing loudly.

"Uh huh, he's in the bathroom. We're at a cotillion right now," The girl said coolly. "Who is this, anyway? I'm Andrea Monticelli. You may have heard of me. I used to model for Gucci. Adam's my date, I hope you know. We're just having the most fabulous time together," She added, extra emphasis on 'together.' Mia suddenly felt like screaming what she was thinking at that moment…"LET ME TALK TO ADAM, YOU EVIL, SKANKY BITCH!" She refrained from doing so but felt her face grow hot with anger.

"Well, Andrea, this is Princess Mia of Genovia," Mia hissed. " And Adam is my boyfriend and he loves me. So, could you please let me talk to him?"

Mia heard someone talk in the background. Adam. "Andrea…What do you think you're doing on my cell phone? Could you please give me that? Who are you talking to? Please don't tell me you're making long-distance calls to Egypt."

She heard what must've been Adam attempting to take his cellphone from Andrea while Andrea struggled to hold onto it. She was unsuccessful. The next voice she heard was Adam's, talking into the phone.

"Hello? Who is this?"

"Adam. It's me…Mia," Mia said, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

"Mia! Oh my God. Hey! How are you?" Adam exclaimed, suddenly sounding jubilant, which made Mia's heart skip.

"I'm great. Wonderful. Great. Um, how about you?"

"Oh, I'm doing well. I'm at this cotillion though and it's really, extremely boring," Adam said with a laugh. He added with an audible whisper, "My date's a complete snob as well."

"Your…Your date?" So, what Andrea had said had been true.

"Yeah, my day—OH! No, no…Mia, we only went together as friends. Hell, not even as friends so much as acquaintances. Our families thought it'd be just dandy if we came together. And trust me, you do not want to defy my mother when she has that death glare on her face." He laughed lightly which couldn't help but make Mia smile.

"How…how is your mother?" Mia asked quietly. Adam suddenly stopped laughing and there was an awkward pause. Mia wanted to die right there and then. Mia could hear Andrea muttering in rapid French, an annoyed tone to her voice.

"She's not doing well," Adam said, his voice suddenly taking on a serious tone. Mia knew how he must've looked at that moment, his eyes probably dropping, his mouth a thin, pursed line. "Sh-She's gotten worse since I've arrived." There was another brief pause and Mia closed her eyes, wanting to be there to hold Adam's hand and comfort him.

---

But then she remembered what she needed to tell him. And she was pretty sure she would blurt it out if she were actually with him. "AdamIcheaonyouwiMichaZ," Mia mumbled.

"Uh…What?" Adam said, sounding bemused.

"Nothing. I mean, it's not nothing. Just nothing important. Well, uh, I miss you," Mia said, not stopping to breathe for air. Adam coughed and Mia just knew he had a smile on his face at that moment.

"Well, I'm thinking it's not nothing," Adam said crisply. "So, why don't you just tell me what it is? It couldn't be something as horrible as having to suffer through this cotillion, is it?" When Mia didn't speak, Adam knew it was serious. And he knew it was something much worse than the cotillion. So much worse.

"…Mia?" He managed to say.

"I…" Mia said, softly clearing her throat. "I cheated on you."

"What? Did you…Did…What?" Adam said, sounding amazingly less upset than how she thought he would be. But she felt sad all the same.

"Adam…I cheated on you."

"You…you did?" Adam said, sounding completely in disbelief. Mia felt tears slowly building up in her gray eyes. When Mia didn't speak, Adam chose to continue.

"W-With who?" Adam said, his voice cracking like a thirteen-year-old boy's. He himself, Mia noticed, sounded close to tears as well. Should I tell him? Mia thought to herself, her lips pursed.

"Michael," Mia said, her voice a loud whisper.

"Michael who?" Adam inquired almost sharply.

"Z," Mia murmured.

"Z? What do you mean, Z?" Adam said, sounding confused.

"Michael…Z…I cheated on you with Michael…Z," Mia said, tears pouring down her cheeks. Adam felt as if she had taken his heart out and stepped on it repeatedly, it hurt so bad. He had never been cheated on before and had never cheated on anyone. He was a person with principles. And he had thought that Mia had been too.

"Michael Z? What? How?…"

"We used to date. Back in high school. He…he was my first love."

It suddenly all sunk in.

He wouldn't want her back. How could he want her back after this?

"Mia," Adam said in a new, calmer voice. "I can forgive you for cheating on me, as long as you promise not to do it ever again. But…I can't…I can't forgive you if you say…you say you don't love me anymore. Tell me that you love me. Please, Mia…Tell me you love me…" She felt her throat choking up, her mascara running freely down her cheeks.

She couldn't say it. Because she didn't. Not fully anyway.

Was she still in love with Michael Moscovitz? The same man that had broken her heart six years before?

"I…"

"Do you love me?" Adam whispered.

"I…I don't love you," Mia said awkwardly, her nails digging into her thighs.

"You…you don't," Adam said in a flat voice.

"No…Adam…I am so sorry," Mia said, breathing heavily. "But I don't love you…I thought I did…I tried to believe that I loved you…but I don't…I can't…" She began sobbing, the loud, chokey sobs she despised so much.

"Mia. Please stop crying. It's okay," Adam said soothingly. That was Adam…always seeing the positive side in situations, even ones that ripped up his heart.

"No, it's not!" Mia yelled, albeit softly. "It's not okay! I cheated on you, Adam! I cheated on you with your fucking role model! It's not fucking okay!" Mia rarely swore, and never to Adam. He seemed taken back, by the way it was completely silent on the phone, with the exception of Mia's sobs.

After a few minutes, it was just completely awkward.

"So," Adam said softly. "What happens now?"

"I'll…I'll give you back your ring," Mia said gently.

"No, no. Keep it," Adam said. "Keep it and remember me, okay? And not in a bad way."

"You're not a bad person, Adam," Mia said. "You are one of the kindest, funniest people I know. I'll miss you."

"You make it sound like I'm dying," Adam said, chuckling lightly.

"I would hope not," Mia said.

"Well, I'll miss you too, Mia. I'll miss you so much."

---

The Journal of Amelia Mignonette Grimaldi Thermopolis Renaldo

I did it. I told him. And now I'm completely sure that Satan is going to have dibs on me when I die. I still can't believe it. I cheated on Adam with Michael. And for some reason, now I don't regret it. Not one single bit. Because you know what?

I'm still in love with him. Not Adam. Michael. Always Michael.

But, somehow, I have a feeling that everything's more complicated than it seems.

---

It had taken him nearly two hours to find it but once he was there, he knew it hadn't been a waste of time. Michael stood in front of the small blue house with the unique parrot mailbox and felt instantly comforted. It smelled of pine outside, the air smelling strangely of cinnamon and cloves. He slowly walked to the front door, hesitant to knock. He saw a light on inside and knew that she was in there.

He knocked on the door, a small breeze flowing by. It took less than five seconds for the door to open.

"Um…hello. Wait…Michael? Michael with the friends from the Bluebird Lounge?" Jessica said, a smile on her face.

"Uh, yes. Michael with the friends from the Bluebird Lounge," Michael said awkwardly. "Wow. This is odd. I shouldn't have come. Sorry to have bothered you." He was about to turn around to leave when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned and was face-to-face with Jessica.

"Don't leave," Jessica said kindly. "Come in and I'll make you tea or hot chocolate or something." Michael grinned.

"OK."

---

"So, why didn't you tell me you were in this uber-famous band?" Jessica questioned over a cup of hot tea.

"Well, I guess it was because—Hey, wait. How did you know that?"

"I don't live under a rock, Michael. I was minding my own business, standing in line at the grocery store when I saw the latest issue of Spin. And who should be on it but you? And that girl that was making out with that trashy guy. So, I bought the magazine and read the article. How was I to know that a random hot guy I met at a bar would turn out to be the lead singer for this world-famous rock band? Seriously. It doesn't happen every day."

"Ha, I guess not," Michael said, sipping his tea.

"So, why'd you choose to come over to my humble abode anyway? I can't imagine it's because you wanted to check out my parrot mailbox and steal my tea," She said, smiling.

"I wanted to take you up on your offer to hang out. And I needed to talk to someone," Michael said, adding, "And you're the only person I could think of."

"Oh, I'm touched. Over all of your close friends, you choose a complete stranger to share your thoughts with."

"Well. Yes. I guess so," Michael said, not catching her sarcasm.

"Happy New Year," Jessica said absentmindedly, stirring more sugar into her tea.

"What a way to start out the year," Michael said bitterly, drinking his tea slowly. "I succeeded in helping my ex-girlfriend cheat on her boyfriend."

"Oh. Wow," Jessica said, suddenly taking an interest. "This isn't the girl from the Bluebird—"

"No, no. It's another girl," Michael said. "We used to date when I was a senior in high school. Then I, uh, sort of dumped her after we had sex for the first time."

"You didn't," Jessica said, her mouth dropping open. Michael shyly nodded his head.

"My God, I'm such an idiot," Michael said. "Even more so now, it seems. And now I have no idea what to do. I think that I still love her, even after these six years apart. I love her even more now. But she has a boyfriend. Of course she does. And I have a…Shayne. A Shayne. But not really. I don't even like her. Not like that. It feels like high school all over again." He began rubbing his temples, a headache slowly forming.

"What do I do?"

"Well," Jessica said. "Does this girl know that you still love her?"

"No," Michael said almost immediately. "But she gives me these looks. You know what I'm talking about, right?"

"Only too well. What can you do? Well, first of all: Tell her that you still love her."

"It's more complicated than that," Michael said sadly.

Jessica sighed softly. "It always is."