Secrets of Faith –

"I never believed you would wait for me." GSR

Disclaimer – If I owned them there would be several more digits on the end of my bank balance. Sadly they are not mine (trust me, I checked just in case). I do own a couple of seasons on DVD… but I am also reliably informed that this does not count.

Spoilers – Another one exploring the post-Butterflied idea, what could have been (or what we wish had been maybe…).

Rating - PG 13 (just because I'm paranoid.)

A/N – It's probably been done in some form or other before.. but then again hasn't everything? Blame this on the fact I had a title and just needed something to put under it! That and that I have way more spare time right now than normal, and have to find something to fill the hours. Mistakes are my pets; I like to let them roam free. Reviews: make my day.

The dark wine red of the room suddenly seemed vaguely oppressive in the darkening light. She had always found it quite inviting, a relaxing colour, and in keeping with her personality. She had walked in the apartment after a longer day than she felt she had, had in a very long time. Flopping down onto her sofa was about all she felt up to and she knew there was no way she would actually be able to sleep. Her insomnia would not be improved in the slightest by the events of the day.

Watching the interrogation of Vincent Lurie was a suitable end of a spectacularly terrible day for Sara. She had already realized she had made Catherine duly suspicious thanks to her comments after the viewing of Debbie's body, and Grissom's actions and subsequent confession had put her entirely on edge. She shivered violently and took hold of the quilt spread over her daybed before wrapping it around her shaking shoulders.

She put her entire physical reaction down to a mild case of shock. Shock at what she told herself. The entire scenario? Or Grissom's admission? A mixture of both was probably the best answer, but one that Sara was doing particularly well at denying. She refused to admit to letting Grissom get to her like that again.

She sat cross legged on the Sofa picking up a Magazine in the vain hope that it might take her mind off everything that was clouding her judgment at the moment. She simply didn't seem to be able to keep her mind on any one thing at a time and with good reason. She dropped the magazine back onto the coffee table and leaned back into the cushions of the seat closing her eyes in contemplation.

She almost wished that she had not been there to see the interrogation, that way at least she would still be in the dark. A comfortable place to be in her opinion. The fact that she wasn't worth the risk hit her hard. She had always believed that perhaps he just didn't feel the same way. Knowing that he felt the same way as her, and yet refused to take the risk was strangely more painful than simple rejection. She closed her eyes in an attempt to ward off the tears she had been holding back for a while. She prided herself on letting very little affect her, the fact he could get underneath her skin like this made her decidedly uneasy. The pricking in her eyes told her that she was fighting a losing battle and eventually she gave in to the tears, simply letting them fall.

She must have been even more tired than she had imagined as the next thing she heard was the harsh ringing of her phone from somewhere in the vicinity of her waist.

'So much for not being able to sleep.' she thought to herself. Dragging herself into consciousness, before reaching for her cell phone, and mentally preparing herself to be called back into work.

"Sidle." She answered briskly.

An unfamiliar voice replied. "Excuse me Ma'am, do you know a Mr. Grissom?"

Sara stammered out a 'yes' slightly knocked off balance at the unexpected question.

"You were the last missed call on his cell. We figured you might be able to come pick him up and take him home." Sara frowned, utterly confused, but took down the directions nonetheless. She thanked the voice distractedly and hung up. She snagged the keys to her Tahoe as she passed the table by her front door, and was out at the car within moments.

Her mind was in overdrive the entire journey. What was Grissom doing that involved needing her to pick him up? Was that not normally Catherine's jurisdiction? Sara was fairly sure he would not voluntarily have called her. It was these moments when she truly realized just how far downhill their relationship had gone. There was a time when he would not have hesitated to call her for anything. That time was long gone and it seemed was an irretrievable situation. It was way too far gone for her to try and make amends. She had already embarrassed herself enough, if he wanted to sort things out, it was damn well going to be his initiative, and not because she pushed for it. Come to think of it, why exactly had she agreed to do this anyway? Sara of course knew the answer. When you feel that way about someone you aren't about to turn down an opportunity to see them, are you? Even if they will almost certainly be less than thrilled to see you.

As she pulled over next to the bar she groaned slightly, what else could manage to make a day like this that bit worse. "Boom" as it turned out was in fact a restaurant and a bar, and luckily, surprisingly quiet for 10:30 at night. Upon entering the bar it was difficult not to notice the familiar figure slumped against the bar. She wandered over, seriously considering simply sitting down, ordering a drink and pretending she had nothing to do with him. He was nursing an empty glass which must have previously been filled with some highly intoxicating drink to have rendered him into the position which he now found himself.

She smiled grimly at the bartender and turned towards the form leaning on the bar. "What the hell have you done to yourself. I'm the one who should be drinking myself into a stupor right about now." she muttered quietly.

Sara turned back towards the apparently long suffering barman, "You think you could give me a hand getting him to the car?"

"Sure, I conned his keys before calling you. You might need them." The young man tossed her the keys before wandering around to help.

"You going to be Ok once you get him home?"

"I'm sure I'll manage something." She bit her top lip slightly and furrowed her brow looking at the apparently comatose form sprawled in the backseat of her car. She shook her head and huffed a frustrated breath, before making sure no limbs were in the way, and firmly slamming the door.