Chapter 13 – A Painful Choice

The Li mansion was above elegant. It was spectacular. Tomoyo Daidouji and her mother, Sonomi, sat in the first floor living room, waiting for the Li women. Staying in the place she knew she would spend the rest of her life in made Tomoyo uncomfortable and nervous. She didn't know what it was about the extravagant home, but she didn't want to live here.

"Tomoyo? Are you all right, my dear?" Sonomi asked, concern creasing her forehead.

She nodded silently.

"I wonder what's taking them so long…"

"Mother," Tomoyo spoke up softly. "Syaoran's not here, am I correct?"

"Yes. As far as I know, he's still in Japan."

"Then what are we doing here?" she couldn't help but ask. "Couldn't we visit when he returns?"

"Tomoyo," Sonomi began, but was cut off by the entrance of the enchanting sisters.

The Daidouji women stood in respect and as the sisters arrived in front, they bowed to each other.

"It's wonderful to see you, Sheifa, Feimei, Fanren, Fuutie," Sonomi greeted.

Tomoyo sent a small, bashful smile to the women, who smiled just as little. "And you, Mrs. Daidouji," Sheifa greeted. "Please, sit."

"Thank you."

As the conversation began of the arranged marriage, Tomoyo looked away in trouble. She didn't want to be in this marriage. It wasn't because of Syaoran; she was sure he would be a wonderful man. It was that she felt trapped in a world her mother had created just for her and she couldn't get out. She never lived independently and would never know how. Tomoyo sighed in her seat.

"May I take a break?" She asked.

Five pairs of eyes glanced up at her in question.

"Are you sure you're feeling ok, dear? You look pale," Sonomi murmured.

"I…I need air," she replied bashfully.

"Very well."

The Li women nodded in understanding, gentle smiles settling on their faces.

> > > >

The Li family was compassionate, understanding, and all in all wonderful. Tomoyo would be very lucky to marry into such a family. But… it just wasn't she wanted. She exited the mansion and found her way out to the clean scent of the trees and sea. She found a lone place underneath a cherry blossom tree. Tomoyo touched the soft petals with gentleness and felt the tears threatening to slip beneath her eyelids. She swiped the tear that released in haste. Before long, however, the tears wouldn't stop and all she could do was sob in silence. A strong hand settled on her shoulder. She gasped in terror, her body stiffening in response. She turned and met the surprisingly warmest blue eyes she'd ever seen. She blinked. A feeling of nostalgiawashed over her.Tomoyo frowned, her gaze immediately shifting away.

"Who-who are you?" She asked, stepping back.

He ignored her question and moved forward. "Who made you cry?"

Who was this man? Tomoyo's lavender eyes shook in confusion. "Who are you?" She repeated, retreating yet another step.

Before she could go any further, the man grabbed her wrist and pulled her in his arms.

"No!" She tried to fight back, shaking her head vigorously, her gaze directed at his chest. "No, please!" She begged.

"Tomoyo," he began, holding her steadily. "Listen to me."

"Please don't hurt me!"

"I'm not going to hurt you," he muttered almost angrily. "It's me! Don't you remember?"

"What?" She blinked and slowly looked up. "Am I supposed to know y…" Tomoyo's breath caught in her throat as realization very slowly began to sink in. She stared into his eyes for the longest time and with a fleeting gasp, she remembered who he was.

"Finally…" His dark gaze shook her through the bones.

With a shaking sob, Tomoyo jumped in his arms once more, burying herself even deeper in his arms. "You idiot!" she cried. "How could you do that to me? You scared me so much! Why couldn't you just tell me who you were!" She punched at his chest and finally just buried her face on the nape of his neck. "I missed you so much, Eriol!"

> > > >

Feimei placed four glasses of lemonade on the counter and rested on one stool. She waited until the three had stopped pacing around like lunatics and finally sat on their chairs. With a patient sigh, she let Sheifa ramble on and whine about how the Daidoujis had planned to stay in their mansion until Syaoran returned. Of course it was a good reason to be mad, but nothing could be solved that way. Feimei gently tapped the countertop with her fingers, and finally Sheifa heard the annoying sound and glared at her sister.

"My goodness, Sheifa," Feimei said. "What does it take for you to realize nothing's going to be solved by you whining?"

"Sorry," Sheifa dropped on the empty stool and took a large gulp of her lemonade. "But I hate this. This is not fair. Mother should be here, talking to them and entertaining them and telling them to go back to China and never come back! They're forcing Syaoran into something he doesn't want to be in and it is just not fair!"

"We know," Feimei placed a hand over Sheifa's. "But the only thing we can do is to get Syaoran back here now."

"He's supposed to come back next week anyway, isn't he?" Fuutie asked.

"True, but do we really want them staying here for more than 7 days? I mean seriously," Feimei countered.

"I don't know what you have against them. I personally think Tomoyo's a nice, sweet girl," Fanren mentioned.

"We think so too. It's Sonomi we're talking about, Fanren."

She glanced at the window. "I saw her outside with a man earlier today when I was in the kitchen. She looked happy to see him."

Fuutie twirled the glass around and watched the ice drop. "Well…do you want to call him now and see if he agrees to come home tonight or tomorrow?"

"I think that's the best thing to do."

> > > >

His cell rang two hours after he came to work. Syaoran hadn't done a lot for the Li Corporation in weeks and before he needed to return to Hong Kong, he wanted the business sharp and exactly in perfect shape. He put the pen down and took his cell phone from his pocket. Walking across the floor and heading to the balcony, he flipped it open.

"Hello?"

"Syaoran, it's Feimei," the warm voice replied. "How are you?"

He knew that whenever one of them called, there was news of the marriage situation. "What's going on?" He asked abruptly. "Did they ask for us to get married now or what?"

"Uh…not exactly," she murmured. "You see, we need you to come back now."

He stiffened, gripping the balcony railing a little tighter. "Why?"

"Sonomi and Tomoyo are staying in the mansion until you come back here and…we thought that…if you returned tonight or tomorrow at least, we'd get this marriage business dealt with."

"I have one more week, don't I?" Syaoran interrupted.

Feimei hesitated, biting her lip as the quiet seconds passed. "Yes."

"Then no."

"But Syaoran…!"

"I don't even know what's going to happen with me and Sakura, Fei. I can't just leave."

"If you come back here and get things straightened out, you might even be able to stay there!"

"I bet you just want them out of here."

"Look," Feimei touched her forehead and closed her eyes for a moment. "I met Tomoyo and…and she seems like such a nice lady. Now, if you could just-"

"I don't care if she's the goddamn Queen of England," Syaoran interrupted, feeling anger and frustration boil up. "I don't want her."

"I'm not telling you to go ahead with the marriage!" Feimei argued. "I was—am—going to suggest that if you come back and somehow befriend her to make her mother believe that you're falling in love, you could make a deal with her and help her find someone to marry. She does not want to be in this marriage too, Syaoran. Do you understand?"

Slowly he'd understood, but he didn't want to go back. Not when everything was going well here. Syaoran let go of the railing and walked back in the building, watching his co-workers do their job. He sighed. "I get what you're saying, Feimei. Now understand me. I need this last week with Sakura. I just…I don't know what's…I don't want to leave."

"I'm going to call again in two days, ok? I'll talk to you later."

"Fine."

> > > >

It was rainy and gloomy the following day, and that didn't help Syaoran's mood a bit. He stood up in anxiety and paced the small living room as he waited for Sakura's appearance. All he could think of was how to tell her of his going back home. She knew he'd be leaving sometime soon. Syaoran knew it too. But that didn't do anything to stop that thing that started between them. Syaoran stood rigidly by the balcony door, staring at the building straight in his view, his mind blank of anything but her.

Sakura entered the room with gentle footsteps, her gaze moving to Syaoran's stiff back facing her. She sighed to herself, a small smile on her face at the sight of him. He truly was a handsome man. A fluttering feeling quivered in her stomach as she walked over to him and put a hand on his shoulder. He turned in surprise at her touch, and at once, their eyes met and stayed. Sakura felt her pulse jumpat the base of her neck and put a hand over her heart in an impulsive move. Sakura felt his strong arms wrap around her. Her smile shook as she placed her arms around his neck.

Her mouth opened as if to say something, but at the sight of those heart-shaped lips opened just for him, Syaoran caught her lips in his and kissed her like he'd done that first time in the car. The last thing Sakura had seen were his chestnut eyes gazing at her with intensity and unresolved passion. She softly moaned as his tongue lightly touched her lips, begging for entrance. Sakura opened her mouth for him and let her hands rest at the ends of his soft hair, liking the feeling of them between her fingers. His hands had roamed, gently caressing the sides of her body, firmly holding her in place.

Once they'd pulled away, both were out of breath and quite shocked at this powerful thing that had just happened. Syaoran rested his forehead against hers, watching her regulate her own breathing. He tightened his hold on her and pulled her closer to him, feeling their bodies touch ever so intimately. He buried his head on the nape of her neck and placed butterfly kisses on the side of her face. She laughed gently and rested her head on his shoulder.

"What was that?" She murmured near his ear.

"I don't know," he responded, finishing with a gentle kiss on the side of her forehead. "But I liked it a lot."

She laughed. "So did I."

The sound of her laughter made something bump inside him and he didn't know if that feeling was something he was ready to accept. Abruptly, he raised his head and pulled away from their embrace. "I have to tell you something."

Feeling the cold wrap around her from his abrupt change of mood, Sakura wrapped her arms around herself and stared at him, trying to read his eyes. She couldn't get anything. With a small nod, she followed him to her couch and they rested side by side, facing each other. She was confused and didn't know what to do, but wait for his explanation. However, there was a feeling of warning ringing in her mind. Sakura desperately wished to have that wall around her once more, but he'd taken it down so brutally that night he'd kissed her for the first time in years. Now she had no protection against whatever he was going to say. She blinked and firmly directed her gaze to him.

"I have to go back." The hollow words punctured the stone-dead silence in the air.

Sakura caught the words. Back, not home. "To…to Hong Kong?" She very well knew the answer, but she couldn't ask that question. Not when her heart was pounding in an erratic rhythm and her breathing was not so normal anymore.

He nodded. "Feimei called last night…and uh, something just came up and I need to go back and fix it." Very cautiously, he watched her, looking to see what her reaction would be. Most unfortunately, it was what he expected. A flicker of pain flashed in her eyes before being replaced by understanding and acceptance.

"Oh. Ok, then," she murmured. Raising her eyes to his, she asked, "When are you coming back?"

Syaoran looked away, troubled and clearly so unsure. "I don't know if I can."

Sakura blinked. She felt a painful throb of her heart that mixed with the sudden tears that blurred her sight. She blinked once more, taking in the blow, and while doing so, her hands had reached up and profusely wiped away the tears. Syaoran's arms had suddenly held her, and rather than fleeing, she allowed herself to lean just a little."Well." She started, but that didn't help. Her emotions were seeping out of her eyes in delicate tears that she fought to hide from him. She wouldn't show how much it hurt her to hear that. Sakura covered her face with her hands as Syaoran took her in his arms and sat her on his lap. Her sobs were silent, as if she was trying to hide them from him, and that thought only tore him further apart.

As her tears subsided and she found control of her feelings, Sakura pulled away as much as Syaoran would let her. "This is it then?" She whispered, looking up and meeting his gaze.

He swallowed with difficulty and involuntarily held her tighter. "No." Syaoran spoke in a desperate tone.

"Then what?" Sakura's breathing had calmed, but her shoulders still heaved. "If you-you don't even know if you're coming back, then…then there's no point in this."

"I want to come back, Sakura. Believe me. I'd rather..." he sighed, trying to make her understand. "I'd rather stay here."

"Then why can't you come back?" She fought to understand. "If it's just-just…something, then you can come back. Can't you?"

He looked away now, his jaws tightening at the prospect of him having to tell her the truth. "It's…it's not just something."

"Then what?" She repeated, searching his eyes. "Syaoran, tell me so I can understand. Please. I need to know where this is going."

"I can't tell you," he interrupted, his body stiffening. "I'm not going to hurt you more than I already have."

Her pulse skipped a beat. "What does that mean?" She let him stand up and walk away from her. "What does that mean, Syaoran?" She stood up and stared at his back.

He put a hand on the balcony door and stared out at the dark day. "Sakura," he started.

"Tell me." She interrupted in a hurt tone. "You owe me the truth, Syaoran. You've already hurt me a lot. I doubt anything could make me feel worse."

His whole body had seemed to turn to stone in guilt. The heart in his chest turned slightly hard. Syaoran turned slowly and met her eyes through the cold air between them, and surprisingly got his voice to sound deathly distant. "I can't."

Sakura walked straight to him and slapped him hard. Angry, unshed tears filled her eyes as her whole body shook. Her bottom lip thrust out as she firmly glared at him. "You have the audacity to kiss me like that and then break my heart and except to walk away without an explanation?"

His eyes flitted to her trembling mouth and back to her eyes, feeling an invisible knife pierce his skin slowly. It took him longer than expected to get his words out. Syaoran sighed and battled his inner self, taking in Sakura's pained expression, knowing he was hurting himself in the process. "Remember that friend I told you about? The one…" he stopped and looked away. "The one in the arranged marriage?"

She didn't speak,knowing that if she opened her mouth, there would be nothing to come out.

He looked back at her again, determined to face her pain to hurt himself. "There's no friend."

She frowned, utterly confused now.

"I'm the one getting married."

> > > >

To be continued…