Disclaimer: Mahahahahahahahaha! Hehehehehehehehehehe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ahem! I mean Lord of the Rings belongs to....

Pirate swinging on rope breaks through glass window and lands next to author.

"Hellu there matey. Is this where Peter Pan lives?" – Pirate

"Uh...no, I think you're in the wrong story dude." - Chtrin

"Ahh, so sorry to interrupt you miss. Bye bye then."- Pirate

Pirate swings back out and window magically fixes itself.

"So, where was I, right... Lord of the Rings is in the possession of..." - Chtrin

Tony the tiger falls from the sky.

"UMM.... can I help you?" - Chtrin

"Weeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Tony runs out door.

"Ok then...I'm just gonna do this real fast...LOTRbelongstoafellownamed...."- Chtrin

Entire fellowship appears from random entrances such as windows, fireplaces, spoons, bananas, chair cushions, and phone wires.

"Hey! When is it gonna get back to us! I need to express my Kingly Kingness of being King." - Aragorn (using their REAL names for now):

"Yeah, and I need to slap him when he starts acting stupid." -Boromir

Arwen slaps Boromir. "Hey! That's my job."

"I think...." - Pippin

"Shut up!" - All

Pippin starts to cry.

Chtrin slaps all except Pippin. "How DARE you make Pippin cry? How DARE you?"

Gandalf being all delayed, "FOOL OF A TOOK!"

"Stupid old man! slaps him REALLY hard So anyway, Lord of the Rings belongs to..." - Chtrin

"Do you have any food?" - Sam

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! I give up! On with the fic!" -Chtrin

All jump for joy.

"Is there any food?" - Merry, Pippin, and Sam

Before I start the fic I have to thank my ever faithful reviewers. In 24 hours of being posted I had 5 reviews! WHOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOO! Yippy! That makes me reallly happy especial since my last story has been posted for WEEKS and I've only gotten 2 reviews! Thank you all! I shall make it a point to read and review all of your stories if you keep reading and reviewing this one! Thankie! (This is still here b/c I still want to remember my reviewers that reviewed before I was forced to replace it).

Cation: Warning! The following contains TOTAL RANDOMNESS that DOES express the ideas off the top of the author's head.

Ok NOW really back to the fic....

Chapter 2: El Smitho's Councilio

All the hobbity little hobbits of hobbitness were about to burst with joy (literally) when they saw that Fernando was O...K. They bounced up and down on his bed which made him sick in a different way and he spend the rest of the afternoon puking all over El Smitho's elfish possessions. El Smitho came in and smiled because he loved cleaning up messes like this. He got a mop and his maids outfit and made the room all sparkly clean.

"Okie Dokie, now that my room is the cleanest in all the land we can talk about... PEANUT BUTTER!" – El Smitho

"What? No, we need to talk about..." – GoGolf

But El Smitho had already skipped off following a butterfly he thought was a flying blob of peanut butter and attempting to catch it fell over the edge and slashed in the water and

starts to swim like a frog. Awry looks embarressed and proud

"SO...that's your...father!" –Un-hooded Guy

"Umm....Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Arwy rather spontaneously jumped off hill and rolled down mountain.

"Wait Awry!" Unhooded Guy does the same.

"Ahhhhh! What are you doing here? I'm the only one who can jump off a hill and roll down a mountain at the same time!" - Arwy

Unhooded Guy looks at the sky. "I love you."

"That was rather random...but sweet."- Arwy

Unhooded Guy starts to bounce up and down. Screams. "Somebody loves me! And she's a really pretty elfin princess! WOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" – Un-hooded Guy

Lego ubertastically disturbed. "So..."

"SO she LOVES ME!"- Un-hooded Guy

"Yes, and...." – Lego

"Well, does an elfish princess love YOU?!"- Un-hooded Guy

Lego realizes that no one has ever loved him before and starts to cry.

"Awww! It's okay Lego. Lots of rabid fangirls girls you've never met before google over your hotness."- Katie

"Really?" Lego lifts head slightly, "so somebody does love me?"

"Of course Lego, I LOVE you!" -Katie

Lego puts on little red riding hood outfit and skips around. "Lalalalalalalala! Girls LOVE me! Take that Un-hooded Man!"

"Un-hooded Guy!, no man! Wait! Do you even know the girls who love you?" – Un-hooded Guy

Lego stops skipping. "Well...no...but..."

"You know me!" Katie said with a girlish smile. (shocking since she IS a girl)

"Who ARE you?" - Lego

"I am Kathleen Kuper, daughter of Dr. Kuper, and heir to my imaginary throne. Oh, and I'm her friend." Katie points to girl.

"Who's she?"- Lego

"She is Chloe, the author and ruler of all! Mahaha!" - Katie

"Umm...that wasn't me." - Katie

Chloe jumps out from behind Katie.

"Wow! That was creepy!"- Katie

"Hobbits! Hobbits! HOBBITS! Elfy!" Chloe runs from googling over hobbits to hug Lego.

Lego looks at girl hugging him. "See Un-hooded Man!"

"Un-hooded Guy!"- Un-hooded Guy

"Ok little urchin please le me alone now."- Lego

Chloe lets go and Katie hugs him.

"Ahhhhhhhh! Too many people love me!" And thus began Lego's fear of fan girls.

El Smitho was starting to gather in his marbel gazebo and found Lego there in a feedle position under one of the non comfy chairs.

"Um...Lego? What are you doing here?" – El Smitho

Lego takes thumb out of mouth. "Must...hide...from....fan girls!" He twitches, puts thumb back in mouth.

"Why don't I have rabid fan girls that make ME want to sit in a feedle position underneath a chair" Lego puts hands on hips and pouts.

Everyone comes in gazebo.

GoGolf apperates on top of Poppy, "Yes! I did it!" but obviously didn't do it right because he looks rather like gellatin in the shape of GoGolf.

"That's wonderful oldie! Now get off of me!" - Poppy

GoGolf does not get off of Poppy.

"I have a ring! A sparkly sparkly ring! Sparkle Sparkle!" Fernando bounces off gazebo.

"Okay we are here to decide what must be done with THE RING!"- El Smitho

"I say the ring is all powerful and it must be destroyed in THAT PLACE!" – Un-hooded Guy

"Yes, the fires of Mount Doom in the land of Mordor (rolls "r"in Mordor)." – El Smitho

"Why do you roll your "r"s?"- Merfy

"Well, Merfy it is because I used to be a seal and seals gofRRRRRRRRRRRRRRF!" – El Smitho

"Ohhh! Merfy pushes El Smitho.

"What was that for?" – El Smitho

"I wanted to see if you would turn back into a seal. Me likey seals!" Merfy says with girlish smile and wide eyes.

"Ah, then I understand. We seals are very loveable creatures!" – El Smitho

Bomby stares at Unhooded Guy evilly.

"Would you stop evilly staring at me?" – Un-hooded Guy

"Why should we trust a lunatic like you?"- Bomby

"This is no mere lunatic, pause this is Acorn, son of his mother and heir to the throne of..." Lego trails off because...

Bomby gets bored and snatches El Smitho's bow and shots arrows at Lego's feet causing him to trip, fall off the edge, into the water, and come back up again several times.

"Yeah! Pool Party!" Sham runs into house and comes back in a bikini and jumps off the edge.

All others shutter and are disturbed.

"Moving right along... Hey, what are you two doing here?" El Smitho spots Chloe and Katie smiling happily in the corner.

"Hehehehehe! Mahahahaha!" –Chloe

"Translation: We are here to watch over and stalk the Fellowship." – Katie

"Ah, well that's quite all right. Wait! How did you know I was going to call them the Fellowship I haven't even gotten to that part yet! Explain yourselves!" – El Smitho

"Oh..."- Chloe

"Shit!"- Katie

"Run!"- Chloe

So they ran but it turns out El Smitho has elfish summoning powers and pulls them back.

"I said EXPLAIN, not RUN didn't I? Oh my god, am I losing my voice? Nooooooooooooo! My beautiful voice!"- El Smitho

"Do you want us to EXPLAIN or not Mr. Angent man?"- Katie

"It's El Smitho!" –Can't you guess who said that?

"Okay, so we were having this OMG sleep over party and we both fell asleep and had a dream about Middle Earth and now OMG now we're here! "- Chloe

Katie does girlish thing with wrist even though she wasn't the one talking.

"Oh....um....FLOWER!"- El Smitho

"Not again."- Gimles

All look down, except hobbits who have to look up, are shocked to find the little dwarfy standing there.

"Whoa! When did you get here?"- Acorn

"I've been here the whole time, you dumb King... Elfy!" Gimles spots Lego in ball in corner of gazebo and tackles him.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Short furry dude! Help me El Smitho!"- Lego

El Smitho watches a tree as it swims through the water.

Chloe and Katie pry the dwarf off Lego, seeing as everyone else was just spacing OR staring into space.

Lego whips tape recorder out of tunic pocket. "Note to self: add dwarfs and fan girls to list of things to fear. Oh, and seashells, they are VERY scary!" Lego puts tape recorder away. "Okay so that's: light bulbs, toilet seats, photo albums, yard sticks, hole punchers, birds, itchy sweaters, rolly chairs, remote controls, fan girls, dwarfsa, and seashells." He shutters.

Fernando appears in statue form slightly to the left of the center of the gazebo (he was already there in normal/hobbit form)

"Mr. Fernando! Nooooooooo!"- Sham

"Sham, I'm right behind you."- Fernando

Sham looks around to find source of non exsistant voice.

Poppy & Merfy go to poke Lego.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Haven't you people disturbed me enough today?!"- Lego

"Actually, we're not people, we're hobbits!" Poppy goes into loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong speech about hobbits, "and the only real PEOPLE who have tortured you today are Acorn and maybe Bomby with all his shooting and all. So the answer to your question is no."

Everyone except Poppy and Bomby were asleep. Bomby had grown extra ears to listen to Poppy's hobbit story.

Bomby smiles. "Tell me MORE!"

Poppy seeeing the obsession in Bomby's eyes and knowing how it felt to be utterly obsessed with something, "Umm...let's save that for later..."

"NOOO! I MUST KNOW NOW!" Bomby's eyes grow much like Smugoals. (wow. It's shocking how many times I'll use that phrase to show how desperate/obsessed somebody is)

Poppy uses Jedi mind trick. "You do not want to hear more about hobbits."

"Yes! Yes I do!"- Bomby

Obi Wan Knobi appears in bubble bath.

"That's supposed to work on the weak minded."- Obi Wan Knobi

"Why are you in a bubble bath?"- Poppy

"I am not in a bubble bath."- Obi Wan Knobi

GoGolf wakes up. "You are not in a bubble bath." He says hypnotized.

"Wow! That was reverse!"- Jared

"How would you know stupid non jediness boy?"- Obi Wan Knobi

"Haha! I'm a Sith!" Jared puts on music and dances with lightsaber.

"Hey! I was once a non jedi, stupid human."- Acorn

"That's right!"- Merfy

Huge cat fight breaks out!

Chloe & Katie & Jared watch and eat popcorn.

"Hey, how did I get..." - Jared

Random stoppiness was on PURPOSE not due to spontaneous seals attacking me. I don't want to offend El Smitho's "people" by saying they attacked me when it was really penquins.

Okie, in case I confused you in the last chapter I shall clarify: azesxrdctfygvbuhjink

(good, ok) I did add a few character: GimlesGimli, AcornAragorn, (by the by Acorn, Hooded Guy and Unhooded Guy are all Aragorn/Strider) I know I use a lot of already over used jokes but I think that Elrond turning out to be a seal is pretty damn orginal.

Lego: puts on little red riding hood outfit and skips around Lalalalalalalala! Girls LOVE me! Take that Unhooded Man!

Un-hooded Guy: Unhooded Guy!, no man! Wait! Do you even know the girls who love you?

Lego: stops skipping Well...no...but...

Katie: You know me! girlish smile (shocking since she IS a girl)

Lego: Who ARE you?

Katie: I am Kathleen Kuperman, daughter of Dr. Kuperman, and heir to my imaginary throne. Oh, and I'm her friend. points to girl

Lego: Who's she?

Katie: She is Chloe, the author and ruler of all! Mahaha!

Katie: Umm...that wasn't me.

Chloe jumps out from behind Katie.

Katie: Wow! That was creepy!

Chloe: Hobbits! Hobbits! HOBBITS! Elfy! runs from googling over hobbits to hug Lego

Lego: looks at girl hugging him See Unhooded Man!

Unhooded Guy: Unhooded Guy!

Lego: Ok little urchin please le me alone now. Chloe lets go and Katie hugs him Ahhhhhhhh! Too many people love me!

And thus began Lego's fear of fan girls.

El Smitho was starting to gather in his marbel gazebo and found Lego there in a feedle position under one of the non comfy chairs.

El Smitho: Um...Lego? What are you doing here?

Lego: takes thumb out of mouth Must...hide...from....fan girls! twitches, puts thumb back in mouth

El Smitho: Why don't I have rabid fan girls that make ME want to sit in a feedle position underneath a chair puts hands on hips and pouts

Everyone comes in gazebo.

GoGolf: apperates on top of Poppy Yes! I did it!but obviously didn't do it right because he looks rather like gellatin in the shape of GoGolf

Poppy: That's wonderful oldie! Now get off of me!

GoGolf: does not get off of Poppy

Fernando: I have a ring! A sparkly sparkly ring! Sparkle Sparkle! bounces off gazebo

El Smitho: Okay we are here to decide what must be done with THE RING!

Unhooded Guy: I say the ring is all powerful and it must be destroyed in THAT PLACE!

El Smitho: Yes, the fires of Mount Doom in the land of Mordor (rolls "r"in Mordor)

Merfy: Why do you roll your "r"s?

El Smitho: Well, Merdy it is because I used to be a seal and seals gofRRRRRRRRRRRRRRF!

Merfy: Ohhh! pushes El Smitho

El Smitho: What was that for?

Merfy: I wanted to see if you would turn back into a seal. Me likey seals! girlish smile and wide eyes

El Smitho: Ah, then I understand. We seals are very loveable creatures!

Bomby stares at Unhooded Guy evilly.

Unhooded Guy: Would you stop evilly staring at me?

Bomby: Why should we trust a lunatic like you?

Lego: This is no mere lunatic, pause this is Acorn, son of his mother and heir to the throne of...trails off because...

Bomby gets bored and snatches El Smitho's bow and shots arrows at Lego's feet causing him to trip, fall off the edge, into the water, and come back up again several times.

Sham: Yeah! Pool Party! runs into house and comes back in a bikini and jumps off the edge

All others: shutter disturbed

El Smitho: Moving right along... Hey, what are you two doing here? spots Chloe and Katie smiling happily in the corner

Chloe: Hehehehehe! Mahahahaha!

Katie: Translation: We are here to watch over and stalk the Fellowship.

El Smitho: Ah, well that's quite all right. Wait! How did you know I was going to call them the Fellowship I haven't even gotten to that part yet! Explain yourselves!

Chloe: Oh...

Katie: Shit!

Chloe: Run!

So they ran but it turns out El Smitho has elfish summoning powers and pulls them back.

El Smitho: I said EXPLAIN, not RUN didn't I? Oh my god, am I losing my voice? Nooooooooooooo! My beautiful voice!

Katie: Do you want us to EXPLAIN or not Mr. Angent man?

El Smitho: It's El Smitho!

Chloe: Okay, so we were having this OMG sleep over party and we both fell asleep and had a dream about Middle Earth and now OMG now we're here!

Katie: does girlish thing with wrist even though she wasn't the one talking

El Smitho: Oh....um....FLOWER!

Gimles: Not again.

All: look down, except hobbits who have to look up, are shocked to find the little dwarfy standing there

Acorn: Whoa! When did you get here?

Gimles: I've been here the whole time, you dumb King... Elfy! spots Lego in ball in corner of gazebo and tackles him

Lego: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Short furry dude! Help me El Smitho!

El Smitho: watches a tree as it swims through the water

Chloe and Katie pry the dwarf off Lego, seeing as everyone else was just spacing OR staring into space.

Lego: whips tape recorder out of tunic pocket Note to self: add dwarfs and fan girls to list of things to fear. Oh, and seashells, they are VERY scary! puts tape recorder away Okay so that's: light bulbs, toilet seats, photo albums, yard sticks, hole punchers, birds, itchy sweaters, rolly chairs, remote controls, fan girls, dwarfsa, and seashells. shutters

Fernando appears in statue form slightly to the left of the center of the gazebo (he was already there in normal/hobbit form)

Sham: Mr. Fernando! Nooooooooo!

Fernando: Sham, I'm right behind you.

Sham: looks around to find source of non exsistant voice

Poppy & Merfy go to poke Lego.

Lego: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Haven't you people disturbed me enough today?!

Poppy: Actually, we're not people, we're hobbits! goes into loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong speech about hobbits and the only real PEOPLE who have tortured you today are Acorn and maybe Bomby with all his shooting and all. So the answer to your question is no.

Everyone except Poppy and Bomby were asleep. Bomby had grown extra ears to listen to Poppy's hobbit story.

Bomby: smiles Tell me MORE!

Poppy: seeeing the obsession in Bomby's eyes and knowing how it felt to be utterly obsessed with something Umm...let's save that for later...

Bomby: NOOO! I MUST KNOW NOW! eyes grow much like Smugoals (wow. It's shocking how many times I'll use that phrase to show how desperate/obsessed somebody is)

Poppy: uses Jedi mind trick You do not want to hear more about hobbits.

Bomby: Yes! Yes I do!

Obi Wan Knobi appears in bubble bath.

Obi Wan Knobi: That's supposed to work on the weak minded.

Poppy: Why are you in a bubble bath?

Obi Wan Knobi: I am not in a bubble bath.

GoGolf: wakes up You are not in a bubble bath. hypnotized

Jared: Wow! That was reverse!

Obi Wan Knobi: How would you know stupid non jediness boy?

Jared: Haha! I'm a Sith! puts on music and dances with lightsaber

Acorn: Hey! I was once a non jedi, stupid human.

Merfy: That's right!

Huge cat fight breaks out!

Chloe&Katie&Jared: watch and eat popcorn

Jared: Hey, how did I get...

Random stoppiness was on PURPOSE not due to spontaneous seals attacking me. I don't want to offend El Smitho's "people" by saying they attacked me when it was really penquins.

Okie, in case I confused you in the last chapter I shall clarify: azesxrdctfygvbuhjink

(good, ok) I did add a few character: GimlesGimli, AcornAragorn, (by the by Acorn, Hooded Guy and Unhooded Guy are all Aragorn/Strider) I know I use a lot of already over used jokes but I think that Elrond turning out to be a seal is pretty damn orginal.