By Hikaru Hayashi

I'm updating this fic because I was bored and I needed something funny to write, so yeah.

Guess what? This chapter is all original (never got this far last time before it got taken down…)

I'd like to thank everyone who's reviewed so far for keeping up with the program even though I've disappeared for months on end! Thanks a lot!

Disclaimer note: ANZU WILL DIE…We hope. Well, we can dream, right? I mean, Bakura IS capable of defeating her, right? We can only hope. Ah, shoot. I don't own them.

Chapter 8: Shadow Realm Chaos

When we last left off on When Anzu Snaps, our extremely violent former pacifist antagonist, Anzu-Battousai, had killed our beloved Pharaoh Yami. It seemed as though nobody was left that could stop her, until Thief Bakura, upon Yami's death, just happened to finally lose his cool and he prepared to face Anzu-Battousai head on as he vowed to avenge Yami and Malik.

Anzu-Battousai and Jounouchi's head trembled as the remaining Yu-Gi-Oh! cast members were surrounded by the familiar eerie darkness of the Shadow Realm. (Bum bum buuuuuuuuum!)

"Oh, boy," Anzu-Battousai muttered. "This is not gonna be pretty…"

"Darn straight!" Shouted an enraged Bakura. "You are going to pay dearly for what you've done to Malik and Yami! In fact, so dearly that you will rue the day you were even born! H-ha ha ha ha hah!"

"Um, could we just please get to the fighting already!" called the restless spirit of Yugi Mutoh. "Today, if you don't mind."

"Ah, shut up, you little rat!" Bakura growled as he pulled a revolver from his pocket (breaking his own rules, I might add) and shooting Yugi in the head.

Silence. Bakura gasped. "What? Still alive!"

"No, you dimwitted moron!" Replied an annoyed Yugi. "That's the point! I'm already dead! You can't kill me with a revolver!"

Bakura blushed as he slipped the revolver back into his pocket. "Ooh…oops. Heh heh…my mistake…"

"See, this is why I already killed him," Anzu-Battousai said, crossing her arms. "Unfortunately, that didn't seem to work, so we'll just have to put up with the annoying little punk-sucker."

"Hey! I resent that!" Yugi called angrily. "And aren't you losers supposed to be fighting anyway instead of wasting your time insulting me?"

"Who is he calling a loser?" came the voice of an unknown stranger. "He's just a much a loser as any of you pathetic morons."

"What in bloody…!" Bakura shouted, startled. "Who's there!"

"If I didn't know any better," Anzu-Battousai started, getting her giant machine gun ready for action. "I'd say it was Seto Kaiba. But I do know better because, for one, he's dead, and two, that doesn't even sound like Kaiba. So, I'm lost. "

"Of course, YOU know," Yugi shot. "YOU'RE the one who killed him! By the way, he told me to tell you how much you royally suck for killing him and Mokuba, and how you two could have had a beautiful relationship."

Anzu-Battousai's eyes grew wide as she sweat-dropped. These words came from the mouth of the former Seto Kaiba? You have got to be kidding me… she thought. I don't think so!

Ignoring Yugi's comment, she shook her head, readied her gun, and said, "But whoever this 'unknown' is, he's about to get his head blown off!"

Bakura cringed. "Hey! My realm, my rules! NO HEADS, PLEASE!"

"Yes! No heads!" came the voice of Unknown. "And, aren't you two in the middle of a grudge match? Forgive me for interrupting, but it seemed interesting; I had to watch!"

"Hey! Unknown punk! I've got a question for you!" Bakura called to their unseen visitor. "We're in the Shadow Realm! Nobody gets in or out unless I say so. So, how in Ra's name did YOU get in!"

Unknown chuckled evilly. "That's my secret…" he answered slyly.

"Now wait just a bloody minute, you slime!" Bakura shouted angrily as Anzu-Battousai snuck up on him with the same pipe she had used to kill Yami. Since they were in the Shadow Realm, Bakura sensed her coming and used his Millennium powers to block her.

It was like running smack into a wall. "Ooh…I'm dizzy…" she mumbled as she saw stars. "Hey, look! There are two Bakuras!"

"Ah, shut up." He muttered.

"I know!" Yugi piped up. "The unknown stranger! Maybe it's Shadi!"

"Hello." Shadi said, appearing from nowhere in the opposite direction.

"Smooth…" Bakura growled, sweat-dropping. "Any more brilliant ideas in that tiny little ghostly head of yours!"

"No…" Yugi muttered as he turned bright scarlet.

Shadi, dressed in white garments with a turban, looked around conspicuously. "This is not good." he said. "I'm sensing a disturbance in the Force…"

Yugi, Bakura, and Anzu-Battousai just stared at the strange man with the turban.

"O-kay, he's finally lost it…" Yugi sighed. "Kill him, Anzu!"

"With pleasure…!" Anzu-Battousai said, aiming her blaster at Shadi.

"No, wait! PLEASE!" Shadi shouted as he began to back away. "I beg of you...!…you're making a mistake! Fight the evil within you, Tea!"

"MY…NAME…IS NOT…TEA!" Anzu-Battousai shouted. "See, this is the reason I got rid of that punk Noah!"

With these words, Shadi was blown to a pulp. The only thing left of him were his charred remains, his turban, and his Millennium Key.

"Remember the name Battousai Mazaki!" Anzu-Battousai said to what was left of Shadi before cackling madly, not like he could hear anyway.

"I'll take your Millennium Key, Shadi!" Bakura said as he snatched up the Key and hung it around his next with his Ring and Yami's Puzzle.

"Hold on a second!" Ghost Yugi shouted. "When did you get the Millennium Puzzle!"

"More like, how long has he had it?" Jou's head asked.

"About twelve minutes!" Bakura said to Jounouchi's head, then turned to face Yugi in surprise. "And you! I thought you could figure everything out, Mr. King of Games!"

Yugi thought for a second. His thoughts brought him back to the moment of Yami's demise…

After determining that our poor Pharaoh was dead, Bakura threw his head back and screamed loudly:

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Jou's head cried. "No! Not Yami! No!" Yugi's ghost seemed unfazed as he watched this spectacle.

Bakura gently placed the fallen Pharaoh on the ground…then took a quick glance around to make sure no one was looking. In a hardly noticeable slight of hand, Bakura took the Millennium Puzzle from around Yami's neck and put it around his own before standing up and facing Anzu-Battousai with extreme rage.

"OH MY GOD!" Ghost Yugi shouted upon realizing this fact. "Bakura! I can't believe you did that! How cruel can you get! That's just plain messed up!"

Bakura faced him with a paranoid look. "Just about as messed up as not mourning your yami's death…" he shot back.

Ouch. These words cut through Yugi's "heart" as he realized how cruel he had been…cheering on Anzu-Battousai…shouting insults at Yami… "Oh, no!" he cried as he sank to the ground on his knees. "What have I done? How could I have been so cruel?" For the first time since he'd been a ghost, Yugi cried.

The thief rolled his eyes. "How pathetic…" he mumbled.

"Not as pathetic as you are, my dear Thief Bakura!" came Unknown's voice.

"You! In the shadows! Please shut up!" Bakura shot at Unknown.

"Oh, dreadfully sorry," Unknown said sarcastically. "Did I make the big bad tomb robber angry?"

"That's it. You're dead buster!"

"Oh, I'm so scared! The sorry, wimpy tomb robber is going to kill me. Oh, whatever shall I do!"

"That's right, punk," Bakura mumbled. "Keep talking! I'll make sure you get yours in the end."

"H-ah ha ha ha hah!" Unknown cackled.

"I can't believe you have the gall to be insulting me…on my own turf, I might add!"

"Hey, football players lose on their own field. Therefore, it's perfectly legal for me to heckle you in your own dominion!"

"Well, we'll see about that once I unmask you! Only a spineless coward would attack from the shadows!"

"Then why the blazes are you planning on fighting this deranged…ehem, "girl" in a realm of shadows, Mr. Smoke-and-Mirrors?"

Bakura was stunned as his own words were thrown back at him, hitting him like a sixteen-ton anvil. "Ouch…touché…"

Just as quickly as it had appeared, the dark mist vanished into thin air.

It was at this moment that Unknown is revealed. "Oh, snaps…!" he said angrily, wishing the shadows hadn't evaporated. (A/N: Hypocrite…)

"Aha! I should have known…!" Bakura shouted in triumph…until he noticed that Unknown's face didn't look familiar to him. "Huh…wait, just who are you, anyway?"

Yugi's ghost, Jou's head, and even Anzu-Battousai cringed at the figure before them.

"No! It can't be…!" Yugi gasped upon instantly recognizing their unknown visitor…

End Chapter Eight!

Now, I've got a game for you! I dare you to guess who "Unknown" is and put it in your review. If you get it right, I'll mention your name in my opening notes for the next chapter.

Why am I doing this? Just because I thought it was fun! (Now, let's see how many people guess wrong…heh heh…)

"Unknown" will be revealed in the next chapter. Please review. Ja ne!