(A/N):

:sobs hysterically:

PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!

Blame my muse who gives me ideas that I can't just ignore if you think this fic is sucky. My muse came up with it all (and a friend of mine, IsiwaruOfCkaloatia on here, helped a lot with making the OC. I'm not good at making people…). All I did was the writing part.

Flame if you just can't control yourself, but at least include constructive criticism.

I may redeem myself with a better Cirque Du Freak fic eventually…

(Long) Songfic to Beautiful Things by Andain (it's a GREAT song, though not many people have heard it…even less actually understand it…). Lyrics in italics (obviously).

Takes place somewhere between The Vampire's Assistant and Tunnels of Blood.


Got up early, found something's missing
My only name

The evening was slowly turning into a dark night as Serena stood at the edge of a deep lake, far from her house. She left that morning and had walked all day, not heading in any particular direction, finally deciding to stop here. Her parents hadn't cared that she had left. They never did. The only times they cared about where their daughter was, they felt like contacting dead Grandma Edna or something. If it was one of those times, she had better be within her parents' yelling distance. That was all Serena was good for – contacting dead people.

Ever since she was little, Serena had nightmares where old people and sick people tried talking to her. One day she realized she could communicate with the souls of the dead whenever she wanted if she concentrated hard enough.

No one else sees, but I got stuck
And soon forever came

Lately, no one had noticed how depressed Serena was getting. Either that or they just didn't care. Both were equally possible. Serena simply did not get along with people. She ignored pretty much everyone, only interacting with the annoying people who were constantly forcing her to participate in conversations. None of them really cared about her…most of them just wanted everyone else to think they were a great person, trying to befriend an outcast like Serena, and eventually they gave up on getting her to talk.

That morning, Serena had woken up and stayed there, lying on her bed and staring at the ceiling as she thought about how pointless her life was. She was sick of people using her to talk to their dead relatives. She hated giving them the satisfaction of the knowledge that they could use her like that whenever they wanted, just like their own special phone. That's how it had been, all of her life. The only reason she did it was because if she ignored the spirits, she had very disturbing nightmares at night. Nightmares filled with horror no one else could ever imagine.

Stopped pushing on for just a second
Then, nothing's changed

Not even her family truly cared about her. That's why she was here now. That's why she was going to put an end to everything. The nightmares, the people, the spirits…all of it would be gone soon. And no one would mind in the least.

Who am I this time, where's my name?
Guess it crept away

She looked momentarily at her reflection on the smooth surface of the dark lake. This would be the last time she saw it – the too pale skin that the wannabe Goths at her school envied so much, the unnatural looking, almost scary blood-red color of the wavy hair that framed a sad looking face with amber eyes.

Serena had always despised the way she looked. She was born that way, it wasn't her fault she looked so weird. Yet people acted as if she should be blamed for her unusual appearance. These thoughts egged her on. It was better this way.

But, just in case, she whispered a silent prayer to herself.

"If it's not meant for it to end like this…if I have any chance of a decent future…send someone to stop me."

No one's calling for me at the door
And unpredictable won't bother any more
And silently, gets harder to ignore

Serena waited a full five minutes. No one came.

She decided to leave her clothes on – they would help add weight to her body – and she began to wade into the deep lake. It wasn't as deep as she would have liked, but it would do.

Once she had reached the lowest dip in the bottom of the lake she held her breath and went completely underwater. She searched the bottom for a few moments, finally finding what she was looking for – a large, heavy rock planted firm in the dirt below.

Serena took a piece of strong string out of her pocket and tied one end to her wrist and the other to the top of the rock, making sure to not give herself enough slack to reach the surface. Now all she had to do was wait. Hopefully it wouldn't be much longer…

I forgot that I might see
So many…

It was completely by chance that he had decided to go for a walk past the nearby lake. He didn't even know why he had gone for a walk in the first place – he was very tired and it was late. He stopped at the edge of the lake, gazed across to the small clump of trees on the other side, wondering what he was supposed to be doing. Whatever it was, he felt like he should be doing something.

Just when he was about to go back to the camp the Cirque Du Freak had recently set up, he glanced down at the lake and saw something that shouldn't be there. It was...no, it couldn't be…who could drown in a lake?

But it was, he was sure of it now. It was a person, floating almost on the surface but not quite reaching it.

Beautiful things…
Beautiful things

Forgetting his strong distaste for water, he quickly waded out to where the person was floating.

Take this happy ending away,
It's all the same

Serena kept her eyes tightly closed. After a few minutes, however, the darkness grew even more intense. This darkness couldn't be caused simply by her closed eyes; she knew this must be the end…she was finally going to get away from everything.

Then she stopped thinking altogether. All she registered was how wonderful this was. How completely wonderful! It was fantastic, it was –

Her brain suddenly registered a new fact – the string had broken. That was ok though, it was too late for her to come back now.

A hand grabbed hers. Not a normal hand, though. There was something different about it…Serena's brain had stopped working long ago, so she couldn't think what exactly was different about it.

God won't waste this simplicity
On possibility

Someone was leading her away, out of the lake.

Maybe she was being taken from this heartless world by someone already dead. She was finally, after all this time, crossing over permanently into the dimension she had visited so many times before for other people.

Get me up, wake me up, dreams are filling
This trace of blame

Then she lost consciousness.

Frozen still I thought I could stop
Now who's gonna wait?

Once he had dragged the girl out of the lake and they were safely on land, he put his hand under her nose. She was still breathing.

He sat down next to her on the grass, studying her, waiting for her to regain consciousness, not knowing what else to do.

Her appearance wasn't that of a normal person. Her pale skin greatly contrasted with her blood-red hair. Still, she didn't look as out of place as he did.

No one's calling for me at the door
And unpredictable won't bother any more
And silently, gets harder to ignore

Serena opened her eyes to find herself looking into a black sky, full of stars, itchy grass beneath her cold body. She began to think what a rip-off death was. She could have been in this exact position when she was alive.

Her head was pounding and she groaned. Passing on was more painful than she had expected.

Look straight ahead, there's nothing left to see
What's done is done

A weak groan roughly pulled him out of his thoughts and he looked down at down at the girl.

"Are you ok?" he asked.

The girl looked at him in surprise.

"Wha…who…are you? Am I dead?"

"No, you were drowning. I pulled you out of the lake."

The girl's surprised expression turned into an intense look of frustration as she sat up.

"I wanted to die!" she groaned.

He stared at her.

This life has got its hold on me
Just let it go, what now can never be

An unknown voice spoke in Serena's head.

Maybe this means you weren't supposed to die. You did ask for someone to stop you, remember? it said.

"Why did you want to die?" the boy asked.

"Long story," Serena said slowly. Her brain had finally started functioning normally again and she realized what was so different about the boy sitting next to her…

He was…he was…

So many…
Beautiful things

"Are those scales?" the girl asked incredulously.

"Yeah…My name is Evra, by the way."

"I'm Serena…so are you part snake or something?"

"Yeah," Evra said.

"Wow…" Serena said, forgetting completely about what had just happened. Then she remembered what was going on.

Now what do I do?

"I don't like snakes," Serena lied unconvincingly, even for someone she just met.

"Good, because I don't like redheads," Evra said.

Serena glared at him. "I despise people who save other people against their will."

"It's hard to tell the difference," Evra said. "Don't worry though, I won't bother next time."

And with that, he walked off.

Can I change my mind?

Serena didn't care…

He deserved her rudeness for saving her when she didn't want to be saved…

Right?

Did I think things through?

Serena laid back down on the grass, thinking about what had just happened. She had just had her life saved and then snapped at her rescuer. She should have been nicer…Maybe she'd go follow him and apologize.

It was once my life…
It was my life at one time

No. She wouldn't follow him. It wasn't her fault he had saved her. She had a right to be mad at him.

Still, Serena didn't go back into the lake. She wondered about Evra's question…why had she wanted to die? It seemed so extreme now. That was probably because, for the first time in her life, someone had asked if she was ok and meant it. Someone had truly cared.

I forgot that I might see
So many…
Beautiful things

Serenastayed there, lying down on the grass, staring up at the stars until she fell asleep.

She woke up confused the next day; she had to stop and think for a moment before she remembered the events of the night before.

Then it all came back to her.

She felt a wave of hatreddirected atherself for letting Evra, the first person in her life who had honestly cared about her well-being, just walk off. She slowly sat up in her stiff, sun-dried clothes, put her head against her knees,and cried.

I forgot that I might need
To find out what life could bring