Disclaimer: Again, I don't own Napoleon Dynamite or LOTR. And so I don't have to do this for every chapter, this applies to the rest of the story.
Chapter Two: A Nice Pickle We've Landed Ourselves In, Mr. Frodo!
"Napoleon!" Uncle Rico called as he wandered through the house, chewing on a piece of beef jerky. "Napoleon! Go feed Tina!"
He come to Napoleon's door and heard a tape playing on Napoleon's television: "Welcome to D-Qwon's dance grooves, are you ready to get your groove on?"
"Yes," he heard two small voices answer.
"Alright then, let's get started!"
"Napoleon?" Uncle Rico said and pushed open the door, but when he saw the two hobbits standing in front of the T.V., trying to get their groove on, he stopped. "Hey! What do you kids think you're doing here?"
Frodo stopped trying to moonwalk and stared at Uncle Rico. He was looking quite ridiculous anyway. "We're not 'kids,'" he replied. "We're hobbits from the Shire. I am Frodo, son of Drogo and this," he pointed to his companion, who was busy doing disco moves (but failing miserably), "this is Samwise Gamgee, my gardener."
"You kids are something else," Uncle Rico said shaking his head and taking another bite of jerky. "Well, since I can't find Napoleon, why don't you go feed Tina?"
Sam held out the tray of tater tot casserole as Frodo scooped up a big glob of it in a large, black spoon. As Frodo held it up towards the llama, Sam curiously sniffed the strange food he held in his hands. "Taters?" he wondered. "They smell like taters."
He then took a huge handful of the stuff and bit into it. He chewed it for a moment, trying to figure out what in the world it was. Upon swallowing, he still didn't know what it was, but he decided that he liked it anyway. He took another bite.
"Tina, eat the food," said Frodo, holding the spoon high over his head.
The llama snorted and backed away.
"Tina!" Frodo shouted. "Tina, eat. Food. Eat the FOOD!"
The llama turned its head away, tugging at the rope that tied it to the fence. "Accursed creature!" Frodo cried, hopping madly. A bit of the casserole fell off the spoon and landed in a big, messy glop amongst his curls. Sigh. It was going to take him hours to get all that out. Ten rounds of the bath song ought to be enough. Maybe. On second thought, better make it twelve.
Outraged, he threw the spoon to the ground and stalked off, muttering, "I'll warrant that not even your old Gaffer could feed this wretched beast!"
"You're probably right," Sam sighed, setting down the tray and following after his master (but not before he took another bite of the casserole). "It's hopeless."
Then Uncle Rico stepped outside holding a football, a camera, and a tripod in his hands. "What do you two think you're doing? I told you to feed Tina. Now go do it or your—I mean, Napoleon's grandma won't be happy when she comes back."
Sam sat down, blushing and muttering. "A nice pickle we have landed ourselves in, Mr. Frodo!" he said, shaking his head.
"And stop the whole 'Lord of the Rings' bit!" Uncle Rico called as he threw the football at the camera. "You're not fooling anyone!"
A/N: Oh dear! Frodo and Sam in Idaho? Ah, this should get interesting. Very interesting...
Sorry the chapter was so short, but I'm doing it in a different style than the Napoleon and Pedro chapters. See, those chapters will be done similar to LOTR chapters (but not nearly as long, thank goodness) and the Frodo and Sam chapters will be done in random scenes like in the Napoleon Dynamite movie. It should be great fun!
And what are Napoleon and Pedro up to in Middle-earth anyway? Hee hee...you'll just have to wait and see! But here's a hint, they start to confuse even Gandalf to the point of insanity. Oh yes, it shall be jolly good fun!
By the way, thank you to all my reviewers so far:
Master Akane: Yes, I shall update soon. Is now good?
therealariel: No, Frodo and Sam don't like it very much in Idaho so far. They especially hate feeding that dang llama!
ArcticWolfe: Your name sounds familiar. Any relation to ArcticWolves on the Baten Kaitos forums?
homeschool chic: I'm updating now! Gosh! And I caught you a delicious bass.
Lirimaer Elearie: Wow. So many compliments in one review! And I hope you're not one of those people that's only seen the movies...jk :D
Earendil Eldar: Yes, I was very surprised too that no one else has done this crossover yet. I looked through many pages of LOTR humor and didn't see it anywhere. Idiots!
Rhapsody: Oh yes, Napoleon at the Council of Elrond! Couldn't you just see him driving the elves completely mad ! LOL! Nice name by the way. Are you a music-type person like me?
And on that note, if you didn't see your name here and you posted a review before I updated, I probably didn't see it (you know how long it can take for those things to show up sometimes) and I will get to you when I can.
