Previously on FGF:

Harry watched as Sirius eye's twitched and a fine film of moisture appeared in them, he stated hoarsely, "You're right Moony, it is my fault." Sirius fell against the marble wall and buried his face into his hands.

After a few silent moments, the other boy whispered, "Padfoot…I didn't mean what I said, you didn't mean for this to happen. None of us did, James knows this."

The latter mumbled, "But it was the Cruciatus Curse…I can still hear his screaming in my head…."

Harry's heart gripped painfully at the sight of his godfather weeping, it was too much to witness. Remus walked over and embraced his best friend, letting him cry on his shoulder and made eye contact with feminine green orbs.

Harry felt a throb of soreness thump in his head and he squeezed his sleepy watering eyes closed for a minute, he reopened them to find the scene gone. No one but the candlelight was there to greet him.

Too exhausted to comprehend what just happened, Harry passed out.


Chapter 16: Pressure

Harry began to slowly forget what happened to him last month, his hallucination of the past ebbed out his memory. Only sometimes in the night he remembered vague details, but his sleep was not disturbed by dreams or nightmares, which meant his scar stayed dormant.

Still, he was forced to visit the hospital wing periodically to be checked upon. Even though nothing had happened since however many weeks ago, his condition was getting worse, another one of those fits could result in permanent damage; so Madam Pomfrey told him. She didn't hide any facts from him, or sugar coat any details of the severity of not telling someone if a vision or a burning of his scar occurred. Voldemort could still find a way to possess him. He promised her that she'd inform her of dreams or anything strange that was happening to him.

"Harry, are you in there?" Hermione rapped his skull and he made a face, "What?"

"I've only been calling your name for the past two minutes," she blurted out fearful, "Is it your scar?"

Harry frowned, "Stop it, I'm fine. I really hate this, I really hate everyone walking on eggshells around me and treating me like glass. I was just spacing out."

Even though it was getting to be the Christmas holidays, he was in a cranky mood. The festive surroundings of the Great Hall around them could not uplift his spirits, not even the million of plates of Christmas foods on the table in front of him. The brunette girl opened her mouth to nag when Ron came into the large room, singing with a shrill voice that sounded like nails on a chalkboard.

Several students nearby covered their ears and the red-haired boy sat down beside his friends, singing a chorus terribly off-pitch. Harry shouted over Ron's crowing, "Ron! RON! Stop it, you're giving everyone a headache!"

The other boy continued onward with his singing and Hermione reached out, pulling the earphones out of Ron's ears, "I'm afraid this is my fault."

Her boyfriend glowered, "Bloody hell, I liked that song!"

She turned to Harry, looking almost apologetic, "I'm sorry to say that I gave him his Christmas present early."

"One day early?" noted Harry annoyed.

He took a look at the sleek silver compact disk player, knowing that normal Muggle electric devices couldn't be used in Hogwarts and figured Hermione put a special enchantment on it so it could be used. Harry mentally decided to ask her about it later.

Ron snatched it back, putting the phones back in and kept on singing poorly.

After trying to ignore it, the two best friends were on their nerves edge along with everyone else within a hearing range. Harry got up to yank the earphones away but Hermione was faster, she took up some treacle fudge and shoved a rather big chuck in Ron's throat, causing his mouth to be glued shut and his screeching stopped.

The Gryffindor table laughed and Harry nodded, "Just what I was thinking Hermione." A drawling voice emerged from behind them, "Finally someone's putting Weasley in his place. Potter isn't man enough so he's got the Mudblood to do it."

Draco chuckled heartily along with his crewnies as they sat down at their House table.

Hermione declared coolly, "What I don't get is, how come yousaved Malfoy's ass and he continues to act like one? Please inform me because I'm at a loss."

The sarcastic remark made Harry stare at her strangely and she shrugged, "What?"

"Nevermind. Maybe because he'll always be a prat?"

Ron finally unlodged the fudge from his system and yelled at Malfoy, "Oh yeah, well you can---!"

Harry forced more fudge into Ron's mouth without turning around. Breakfast ended shortly and Harry left the Gryffindors to attend his new Occlumency lessons. He had received a letter earlier, addressing him to go to the dungeons where Snape's classes were held.

Harry ventured down into the darkness and went through the doors, inside sat the Potions Master; looking particularly displeased at the sight of him. Harry thought the feeling was mutual and a familiar soft voice drawled, "Don't worry, he's not teaching you. I am." He turned around to Darcie, who was wearing her standard black robe, standing on the other side of the room.

"Are you ready for your lessons?"

"You're teaching me?"

Snape rolled his dark eyes sarcastically, "Point to Gryffindor." The Black female turned to the Hogwarts professor, "Severus, I'd appreciate it if you didn't interrupt my teaching. I understand this is your classroom but you are only here to supervise. You may comment if I make a mistake, which I do not intend on doing, but otherwise, I wish you would keep your remarks to yourself."

Harry was glad to see Snape's expression turn to an nasty red.

Darcie glanced back at the boy, smiling again, "Now, do you remember what Occlumency is?" He shuffled through his thoughts and uttered, "Something about blocking other people from going through my mind, because Voldemort knows Leg…Legilimency."

Both adults twitched at the Dark Lord's name and Snape looked like he was having a hard time suppressing the urge to shout.

The woman nodded, "Good. Alright, we'll begin right away." She took out her wand and said calmly, "Be prepared, I'm going to say the spell. Use what defense you want…one…two…three. Legilimens!"

Harry saw the movie of memories play in his head.

The person who attacked him in the corridor, telling him angrily to stop messing around. His parent's ghosts in the graveyard. Sirius's face as he fell behind the Veil…STOP, STOP, STOP! he screamed in his head and soon Harry was screaming the words raw as the spell left him.

Darcie went to his side and asked, "Are you alright?" His breathing came out in short gasps and he murmured inaudibly, "You never saw that," and got to his feet weakly.

Her eyes lost their usual enthusiasm for a moment and she responded, "I think you can use a little meditation, it's a great way to clear your mind. In order for you to be able to fight the Dark Lord, you'll need a clear head." With a wave of her wand, several soft mats appeared on the floor and some light poured in from a unknown source, making everything appear soft and misty.

She seated down and Harry joined her, sitting across from her. Darcie patted a rather squashy one, "Professor, would you like to come join us?"

The Head of the Slytherin House sneered tartly, "I'd rather not, Black." Harry was thankful and she smirked, saying more encouragingly, "Oh, don't be a spoilsport Severus…No? Alright then," Darcie made a movement with her wand and tranquil music could heard all around them, "Concentrate on the music Harry, focus your mind on the music and take deep …"

He felt a little foolish but took in the deep breaths rhythmically, his limbs were relaxing, nothing was going through his head. It felt as if time hadn't passed when Harry finally heard someone called his name and he found himself standing in front of his godmother, wand raised.

"- Two - three - LEGILIMENS!"

The moment he realized he hit Hermione, her blood running down her face…Voldemort's face looming closer…Harry's mind began to empty…the dementors surrounding Ron and Hermione…Darcie was standing right there becoming clearer…Ginny's glassy eyes staring right at him, wide, blank, dead… "PROTEGO!"

The young woman had fallen back and Harry was seeing other things….a crowd of Deatheaters jostling a girl……The same girl, cradling a body of a person of her own age, sobbing and the Dark Mark burning on her arm…two dark faced people, one of them was Sirius's Mum…Harry's mother's body laying limply on the nursery floor…

Harry opened his eyes, hearing Darcie weeping, "I forgot to put them in the Pensive…I forgot…I shouldn't have let him see that!" He was leaning on the wall and stood up, seeing her crying in Snape's arms.

The Potions Master sat her down and gave Harry a glare, "You're finished Potter. Go or I'll be forced to take away House Points."

His bright green eyes watched as he took out a bottle of mild Calming Draught and Darcie howled, "HarryHarry…" Another menacing look from Snape made his legs move and he racing from the dungeon; out into the corridors.

He pushed through students who were on their way to their Common Rooms, hardly feeling any of the shoving. He sprinted down to the Head Dormitory, saying the password 'weasel tongue' and bursting through the entrance.

Harry didn't stop even when Hermione and Ron(who had a habit of being found in the Dorm) stood near the stairwell, greeting him at first.

The raven-haired boy flew into their arms, burying his face as if he was a terrified child.

His friends stared at him in shock then regained their senses after a moment, carefully guiding him to the couch. Harry told them what had happened in the Potion's classroom and they were sympathetic; didn't even complain when he wouldn't let them out of his sight. Eventually, Harry became too tired and fell asleep, leaning on Ron and stretched out on Hermione.

It was around ten when the Potter boy awoke, alone, with his back on the cushions. His friends must have decided to go to sleep in their rooms, he guessed.

Harry didn't feel sleepy at that instant and went for a stroll in the castle not caring that he didn't have his map or cloak, not caring if Mrs. Norris or Filch found him wandering.

A pair of eyes were on him.

Harry looked straight down the darken corridor and whispered, "I knew you were following me."

The hooded figure was standing a few feet behind him, Harry whirled around to face the person. It's voice growled, "What have I told you about walking around unprotected? Are you hard-of-hearing or just plain thick?"

Emotionlessly, the teenager took out his wand and threw it away, "There, I'm unarmed. Go ahead and beat me to a bloody pulp like you did last time since I clearly didn't learn my lesson." The figure didn't move, just stood there as if scrutinizing him.

"You've given up," it stated.

Harry shrugged stupidly.

"You can't," the figure stated again.

He replied carelessly, "I don't know anymore. I can't do anything right, everyone around me suffers." The hood shifted as if the outline was shaking it's head, "I can't believe how much of a imbecile you are, Harry Potter."

The raven haired boy was too quick, Harry rammed the figure against the wall aggressively, saying harshly, "Do you know what's like? Knowing that some madman is after you because of a dumb prophecy, because you're the only thing in his way? Watching people you hardly even knew die in front of your eyes? How about people you did? Trying to fight the fact that your life was a complete lie and the people you trust were leading you on while the ones you hate were right all this time?"

Harry raged on, the figure didn't even struggle, "I wish that I didn't survive the attack when I was one. I wish Quirrel had strangled me in my first year. I wish that basilisk poison in second year had killed me. I wish the dementors had just finished me off on the train in third year. I wish for a lot of things, a lot that begged for death because I believe it would be easier then living. I'm still living because everyone else needs me, Ron and Hermione need me, hell, the Slytherins need me. You think that I don't realize that I'm the last hope? God, if anyone is an imbecile, it's your clueless arse."

Harry could have shown that something resembling a smile was visible under the black hood.

The figure gently pushed Harry off and took up Harry's wand; he prepared to bolt. The mysterious person stretched out it's arm, holding out his wand for him to take it.

Harry did, warily of course, and asked, "What you do that for?"

It imitated Harry's shrug, "Dunno," and started walking away.

Before Harry's jaw could drop, it tossed back over it's shoulder, "By the way, you aren't the only one."

---

A/N: Ok, I edited this recently because I forgot to point out the electric devices don't work in Hogwarts. My apologizes, I've fixed it to seem...semi accurate.

LMDGlUVR4EVA: More like a hallucination, but good guess. ;) I've read your new story, it's keeping my attention. Keep up the good work! Well, if you look at my bio, I do say I am a R/Hr shipper, along with damn near everything else imaginable. LoL. How this story will turn out, well, you'll have to figure out. I don't wanna spoil the surprise.

Autumn-leaVez: Thank you for the review! Haha. You will see, promise.