Chapter Two

"Out of the hospital, I see," Bill said as Sirius steadily walked into the Gryffindor Common Room a week later. He nodded slowly.

"Where's... Herm... what's her name?"

"Yes?" Hermione's head popped out over her book. Sirius looked at her warily.

"Professor Dumbledore said that you could explain to me what's going on..."

"Oh, yes. Hold on. RON! HARRY! Just a moment. Make yourself comfortable." Ron and Harry, the James look-a-like, came thrashing down the stairs noisily.

"Whaddya want?" Ron asked, then his eyes brightened. "Sirius!"

"Hullo," Sirius replied glumly. "Why does everyone know my name..."

"I have an idea," Charlie said, coming down the stairs. "Just so Sirius doesn't feel so left out, why don't we introduce ourselves to him?"

"I already know her." Sirius pointed to Hermione. "And him." He pointed to Bill. "...But he's much bigger than when he was as a first year..."

"Charlie Weasley. I'm Bill's younger brother."

"Ron Weasley. Bill's... uh, Bill's... wait, hold on. There's Charlie, Percy, Fred, George... oh, right. I'm Bill's fifth youngest brother, since Fred was born five minutes before George was, an-"

"Harry Potter," Harry interrupted, lightly pushing Ron out of the way. "I'm... an only child... James' and Lily's son." Sirius nodded. He'd already figured that one out.

"Who's that?" Sirius inquired, looking at the staircase.

"Oh, that's just Percy. He doesn't matter," Ron said matter-of-factly. Percy scowled at him and strode up to Sirius.

"Percy Weasley." He stuck out a hand and briskly shook Sirius' hand. "Third eldest."

"...Who would come first? Charlie or Percy?"

"Charlie," Charlie said proudly, prodding a thumb at his chest. "That prat doesn't deserve my spot." He spoke as if Percy wasn't even there. Percy, who had gone a bit more laid-back, punched his older brother on the shoulder and immediately held his knuckles in pain.

"Ouch..."

"Wow. So... who are Fred and George?"

"US!" Fred cried out, scaring everyone for he and George had been hiding behind the couch.

"Gred and Forge," George said.

"At your service," Fred continued.

"As usual."

"Yes... yes, we are."

"Ruggedly handsome-"

"And loved by all-"

"We, together, are... Gred..."

"...And... Forge... yeah. Anyway, hello!" Throughout their whole speech, Sirius stared blankly at them.

"...I never would have thought Molly and Arthur made these," he finally said after about ten seconds of silence. "So, is that everybody?"

"Yes. Toffee?" Fred held out a brightly covered wrapper. Sirius looked at it for a second, then smirked.

"I'm not stupid. That thing's been tampered with." He took the candy and tossed it into the fireplace, where it grew into flames with a big BANG. Fred and George exchanged glanes, threw themselves down at Sirius' feet and bowed.

"How, O, Mighty Padfoot, did thou know it hath been tampered...eth with...eth?" George questioned in very bad old-English.

"I didn't," Sirius shrugged. "Just chuck something into the fire if you think it's untrustworthy. Should make a loud sound, depending on what it is."

"Sirius! Good lad!" Arthur Weasley bellowed, sauntering into the room. Sirius looked up at him questioningly.

"...Sirius, meet... Arthur Weasley..." Hermione said. Sirius' eyebrows shot up.

"You're..."

"Older?"

"Bald!" Then Sirius clamped a hand over his mouth. "Sorry."

"Well, I am forty-nine..." Sirius nodded quickly.

"Very good point. If it's only August, why are you all here?" Everyone in the room looked to each other.

"Be...cause... we're here to help Albus prepare," Arthur said. "Quickly, now. Harry will show you to your dorm, Harry? Ah, there's a good boy." Sirius, Ron and Harry made their way up the stairs; Sirius' eyes lingering on Hermione.

"So... James and Lily's..." Sirius said slowly, laying down on his bed. Harry nodded.

"Yeah. So, while you're here, the students will be coming on September 1st, as usual... and you'll be needing a new name."

"...What's wrong with mine? Am I famous now, or something?"

"Famous for the wrong thing..." Ron muttered under his breath. Unfortunately, Sirius had heard him.

"...Who did I kidnap? Who did I moleste? Who did I rape? Who did I-"

"You didn't do any of those things!" Harry shouted. "I'm sure that Dumbledore will tell you in time. It's not my place to tell you."

"You're Harry's godfather!" Ron piped up. Harry stomped his foot onto Ron's.

"I'm his what?" Harry sighed.

"You're my godfather." He shrugged.

"Wow... this is... way too much for one day... can I sleep?"

"Go right ahead," Ron said, waving his hand as he grabbed Pigwidgeon out of the air. "Stupid owl..." Sirius fell asleep, hoping for the sixth time that week that it was all a dream.


"This blows." Sirius, Ron, Harry, Hermione and the rest of the school were in the Great Hall ten days later.

"Shh, Steven," Ron whispered.

"And I don't like that name!"

"Shh!" Hermione hushed.

"Shh!" Sirius mocked, putting a finger to his lips in exasperation. "Welcoming feasts weren't this boring... whoa! Whoooooa! It's Malfoy!" Ginny pulled Sirius back down onto the bench.

"That's his son. Don't point, it's rude."

"Ewww, Lucy had a son? With who?"

"Your cousin," Hermione whispered in Sirius' ear. Sirius' eyes grew wide.

"Ew, Tonks? But-"

"No!" Hermione, Ron, Harry and Ginny hissed.

"Silence!" All of them turned around to a very angry Severus Snape. "Now, if you don't mind... Black... Professor Dumbledore is trying to speak." He turned on his heel and stalked back to the Staff Table.

"...Who the hell died and made him Severus Snape?" Sirius growled viciously.

Ginny wasgazing off at the Slytherin table. Hermione nudged her. "What?"

"Stop staring at Blaise," she whispered so only she could hear. Ginny rolled her eyes.

"One last announcement! We have a new student in our midst,a seventh-year-Gryffindor. Steven Blaque, if you please?"

"Who's Steven?" Sirius questioned.

"You!" Ginny said.

"Oh." Sirius stood up. "Hello, I'm Steven Blaque. Yes, that's me. I'm from..." he leaned down to whisper to Hermione. "Where am I from again?"

"Durmstrang."

"Durmstrang! Yes, I am from Durmstrang..." He sat back down again. "That was thoroughly embarassing. I'm never doing that again. I'm an idiot who doesn't know my own name."

"...All right, now... Tuck In!"

"Awesome." Ron reached for the chicken.


A/N: That one's slightly longer than last chappie!

Thanks to...

-rockpapersirius
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