Disclaimer: The following fanfiction has been posted for only for pure entertainment purposes only. I, Kato Shingetsu, being of sane mind and able to type hereby state that I do not own the following: Kingdom Hearts, Yu Yu Hakusho, Invader Zim, or Red Vs Blue (which is a parody of Halo). Neopets account holder SailorVenusrz owns Mika. Fanficiton authoress Arienna DyBane owns Shikou. Neopets account holder CallMeDarkfire owns Darkfire. I own Holly.
The muses (Ben, Jimmy and Stephen) are here because I made them!(XP)
Chapter Notices: if you have not played Kingdom Hearts, do so...get to the part where you fight Sephiroth- AND PRAY TO GOD YOU WIN! (XP)
Chapter 4: Red Vs Blue Jimmy Style!
Back in Traverse Town:
Stephen was working on the final calculations of his space warp machine. Jimmy, however, was distracted. With a pair of binoculars, Jimmy was spying on Sora and Holly.
" What the hell is Holly doing with Sora?" Jimmy thought
While Sora went to go get some drinks, Holly caught sight of Jimmy. Holly took out a sheet of paper from her purse and wrote "GET ME OUT OF HERE!" on it. Holly showed it to Jimmy, who smiled and nodded.
Sora was walking back to the table when he saw Holly's sign.
" What the-?" Sora said. Before he could read it, Holly crumbled the paper up and threw it in the mailbox nearby.
" . uhh...Hi!" Holly said while smiling
" uhh...hi?" Sora repeated.
Just then, Jimmy snuck up behind Sora and bopped him on the head. Sora fell to the ground, out cold.
" God bless you Jimmy" Holly said
Five minutes later, Stephen, Jimmy, and Holly were standing on the platform of Stephen's warp device.
" Ok folks we'll be aiming for the Hallow Bastion" Stephen said.
Stephen pressed the red button and- ZOOOP!
Jimmy was the first to open his eyes when the teleportation process was finished.
" Uh one problem genius" Jimmy said
" What?" Stephen asked
The three were not at the Hallow Bastion. They ended up at the Olympus Coliseum.
"...Oops.." Stephen mumbled
" Oops! OOPS!" Jimmy shouted, " That's what you have to say? You mess up the whole teleporting deal and all ya have to say is OOPS!"
" Ohmigawd!" Holly said with stars for eyes, " It's Cloud! ."
Jimmy and Stephen had the anime sweat drops on their forehead because of Holly's valley girl take-off accent (a/n: I created Holly...I wouldn't make her have a valley girl accent...Chicago style accents where it's at!)
The three walked up to Cloud as he was signing up for the Platinum Match.
" I dunno..." Stephen commented, " I preferred your old costume better...and doesn't that red claw belong to Vincent?"
" Who are you people?" Cloud asked
Jimmy, being the simple-minded fool that he is, blinked twice at Cloud and bopped him on the head. Cloud was knocked out by a simpleton's marginal attack (hey..wouldn't be the first time)
" I'm takin' on Sephiroth biatch!" Jimmy shouted and signed up.
LATER (At the none existent but existent in this story Olympus Coliseum Inn)
The three were trying to spy on Sephiroth. They learned that he had a room on the second floor. So they went back outside and saw that the second floor window was about five feet higher then them. Somebody needed to get on somebody else's shoulders.
" Jimmy!" Stephen said, " Get over here and give me a boost"
" Okay!" Jimmy said and came over, " You are a good person, and people say nice things about you"
" Not a morale boost, you idiot" Stephen said, " A physical one! I need to see what's in that window."
" That window is very high" Jimmy said, " I don't think you're tall enough"
Stephen gave out a sigh, " Come here" he said and gave Jimmy a physical boost, " Now tell me what you see"
" I see...a room" Jimmy said
" And? What's in it?" Stephen asked
" There are some walls...and some ceilings" Jimmy said, " Wait, just one ceiling"
" What's making all that racket?" Stephen demanded
Jimmy looked in and saw Sephiroth, who was bobbing up and down. That's right folks, the almighty former General was sugar high.
" Kill them all! Kill them all! Kill them all" Sephiroth said.
" What was that?" Stephen asked
" Your not going to like this Stephen" Jimmy said
Sephiroth looked out the window and saw Jimmy and screamed...a very high pitched scream I might add.
" AHHHHH!" Jimmy shouted.
Stephen lost his balance and fell backwards, " owwww"
Jimmy falls right on top of Holly, " uhhhh" is all Jimmy could say.
" O LEECH!" Holly shouted and gave Jimmy the SLAP OF DOOM.
Jimmy flew into the air and landed two feet away from Holly. He now hand a large, red handprint on his face.
" The pain was worth it..." Jimmy said simply.
LATER:
The platinum match was about to begin. Jimmy slowly walked into the arena.
" So who are you for Holly?" Stephen asked the now calm telekinetic.
" Since it's Jimmy of all people, I hope Sephiroth decapitates him" Holly answered.
Sephiroth teleported in and the music started.
" Ok Jimmy" Jimmy said to himself, " nothing to worry about just-"
At this point, Sephiroth swung his Masamune sword at Jimmy. Jimmy lost 40hp.
" OWWW!" was all that Jimmy could say, " That's it! I'll have to transform into my demonic self by thinking of mean things!"
While Jimmy dodged the attacks that Sephiroth sent out, he thought of mean things.
" Like...milk..no, no! Kitten's with spikes on their backs" Jimmy said, " Now I am thinking of ReD bUlL!...ROOOOOOAAAAARRRRRRRRRR!"
Jimmy jumped in the air, landed on the ground 20 feet away and slowly stood while saying-
" My name is Jimmy, and I HATE BABIES!" he shouted.
" What the hell?" Sephiroth thought
Jimmy went into berserk mode and started to charge at Sephiroth to wail on him.
" Wow..." Stephen said, " It's always the stupid ones that go crazy"
" Aw that's just rude" Holly said.
Just then, a black clad person teleported into the seating area.
"...damn it!" he shouted, " This isn't the Makai!"
Twas Darkfire, a friend of Holly's.
" Hey there Holly" Darkfire said and sat down next to her.
" I stand corrected" Holly said, rethinking of all the idiotic things that Darkfire had done in the past.
Back in the match, Sephiroth was about to go for his Sin Harvest Angel attack. But Jimmy ran up and slugged Sephiroth in the stomach.
" Oh yeah! I gotta show you guys what I found in this one shop" Darkfire said and took out a glowing remote control.
Darkfire pointed the remote control at the battle and pressed the "Volume Down" button.
Sephiroth began to say "Sin harv-" but then was cut off because of the volume.
Jimmy began to laugh but there was also no audio for him. Sephiroth only smirked and walked slowly over to Jimmy, sword in hand.
" GAH! Gimme that!" Holly said and snatched the remote control out of Darkfire's hand. She pressed the pause button. Good thing Holly did because Sephiroth was now frozen in an attacking stance.
" Now's your chance Jimmy! HIT HIM!" Stephen shouted.
" I can't" Jimmy said, " I don't have a weapon!"
Holly sighed at Jimmy's stupidity and pressed the "weapon" button on the remote control. A rocket launcher appeared in front of Jimmy.
" SWEET!" Jimmy shouted and excepted the rocket launcher.
" That's it Holly" Darkfire said, " Your having way to much fun with the remote"
Darkfire went to grab the remote control but Holly blocked him. The two started to fight over the remote control and things got somewhat freaky. Jimmy and Sephiroth started to turn green, then blue. The volume went to a mega-ultra loud, then (thankfully back to normal). At one point there was a picture in picture basket ball game in the left bottom corner of the arena. Finally, the two in the arena were stuck on SAP.
" Mi nombre es Jimmy!" Jimmy shouted (a/n: That's all I know...gomen)
Finally, on accident, Darkfire pressed the erase button and Holly kinda disappeared.
" Qué!" Jimmy shouted.
Sephiroth then bashed Jimmy in the head. " Idiot were no longer in SAP!" he said.
" -.-...I hate you" Jimmy said
Meanwhile on Agrabah
Yusuke, Hiei and Shikou were sitting outside, trying to lay low from the locals.
" It's...to...hot" Shikou managed to say, and summoned a snowcone. " yum blueberry!"
" How come you didn't do that twenty minutes ago?" Yusuke asked
" Cause..." Shikou said, " Twenty minutes ago I was buys counting all the fuzzy things floating around"
Just then, a huge gummi ship landed five feet away from them, crushing the Agrabah palace.
" oops" Mika said
" See! I told you I should of droved" Kurama said
" Yeah right, " Let's go through the story line"" Mika said, " I got other things to be-"
" ARE YOU TWO DONE YET!" Yusuke shouted.
" NO!" The two shouted back.
After another 30 minutes of bickering, Kuwabara finally raised his IQ by six and a half points and asked. " What happened to that other ship...you know the S.S. Minnow Johnson?"
Well, I'll tell you...
Back at the S.S. Minnow Johnson, the authoress and muse were still trying to get away from the rubber piggie plushys.
" Ok the other ship's going somewhere else" Kato said
" Quick turn on the hyper drive" Ben said
" No!" Kato said, " We need something faster. We'll go into.. LUDICROUS SPEED!"
"...Sw33t!" Ben said, his l33t skillz coming back to him.
Kato opened the case for the LUDICROUS SPEED button.
" 1...2...5-" Kato said
" 3 Kato, 3" Ben corrected Kato.
" Right...3" Kato said and slammed her fist down on the red button.
The ship started to go so fast, it's turned random colors.
" WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" The two screamed then paused for a breath, " -AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
Then, thank God, the ship ran out of fuel and crash landed in front of the Hallow Bastion.
Kato crawled out of the ship, " LAND!" Kato shouted and kissed the ground, half crying, half laughing.
" Can we do that again?" Ben said as he came out of the trashed ship...and yes he still was drinking a Mt. Dew.
XPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXPXP
POLL: Who is your favorite non-copyrighted character?
Kato, Ben, Jimmy, Stephen, Holly, Mika, or Darkfire.
Vote: I will have the results for the next chapter!
