Hi! This is my first Fruits Basket fic. I hope you will like. (bow) I got the idea with

an anime music video. It was great. Sigh. I don't have much to say but I hope you

enjoy my Furuba: Jerry Springer Style!

Disclaimer:

Haru: Kei Hao Asakura does not own Fruits Basket (sad) or Jerry Springer (glee!).

Please do not sue her or she might hurt me.

Kei: Never Haru-chan. (hides large mallet)

Warning: OOC to the max and maybe yaoi gag. Most likely ;. ;

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Audience: A-KI-TO! A-KI-TO! A-KI-TO!

Akito: Hello, and welcome to Akito Springer. That isn't my last name, but that isn't

the point. Today on the Akito Springer show, we have cheating lovers, rivals that

have done it and cross dressing hoes. Let's welcome out first guest, Hatori Souma!

Hatori: (walks in, but does not look happy at all) Akito-sama, what am I doing here?

Akito: You're on my new show of course. Now, is there anything you have to

confess to someone that is close to you?

Hatori: (blank stare) No. May I go now?

Akito: You're no fun! Well, someone has something to tell you. Please welcome,

Shigure Souma!

Audience: WHOOO!

Shigure: I love you all! (sits next to Hatori.)

Akito: Now, Shigure-san, is there something you want to tell Hatori?

Shigure: Ha-san… I must tell you this. If I don't… I would regret it for the rest of

my life.

Hatori: (raises eyebrow) And that is?

Shigure: I… I… I HAVE BEEN SLEEPING WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND AND

LOVER AND COUSIN AYAME SOUMA!

Hatori: (blink… blink… blink…) The hell? Ayame? You…

Akito: Guards! Hold him back! Make sure he doesn't hurt Shigure-san!

Two beefy men who we shall call Guard 2 and Guard 7: YES AKITO-SAMA!

Guard 7: Please, forgive us, Hatori-san.

Guard 2: We are sorry!

Hatori: (sigh) Is Ayame here?

Akito: OH NO! Hatori! Don't hurt the one you love! But since you mentioned him,

please welcome, Ayame Souma!

Audience: (cheers and wolf whistles)

Ayame: (tosses hair and winks) Hello my dear friends!

Shigure: Ayame, my love! (runs towards him)

Ayame: Shigure! (runs)

Both: SLAM!

Akito: Umm… are you guys ok?

Shigure: Y-Yes, Akito-sama. A-Are you alright, my love?

Ayame: Y-Yes. Your voice has brought me back to life!

Akito: Hatori, what do you have to say to Ayame, your lover and cousin who has

cheated on you with your best friend and other cousin?

Hatori: (blink blink) Can I kill my self now?

Akito: OH NO! Hatori, suicide is not the answer! There you have it folks! After this

commercial break, we will see rivals who have had unprotected sex!

Audience: A-KI-TO! A-KI-TO! A-KI-TO!

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Well, that is all. Sorry it was so short. More to come if you review.

I know it was short, but I have a terrible headache and I must leave

to eat Mexican food. Yummu yummu. If you like it, please review. As long as I get

at least one review, I will continue. A rule that I go by for life! … Not really.

Anyway, hope you like it. Bai Bai! (bow)

Kei Asakura