Dragging Hiei along behind her, Alexis stormed down the street, tears filling her eyes. She wiped at them occasionally, but mainly occupied herself with stomping on the sidewalk and holding onto Hiei's wrist.

"How could you do that to me, Love?" she sobbed. Hiei cocked his head.

"Eh?"

"How could you tear my heart into little pieces and throw them down on the floor?"

Hiei shrugged. "Did I really?"

Alexis turned on him fiercely. "Yes!" she cried, grabbing hold of his shoulders. She leaned over to whisper in his ear.

"This is the part where you kiss me and pledge your profound apologies and undying affection."

"But I hate you."

"You're doing it wrong."

"Right, because I hate you."

"No," she said, backing up a bit, "you love me, remember? And we're going to get married? What are you, under some evil witch's spell or something?"

"Not that I know of."

Why it was just now starting to register that Hiei was not saying "I love you," he wasn't sure, but better late than never. He just hoped the girl didn't drag him off on some silly trek to "cure him" of his "madness."

"We've got to go to Genkai's temple to cure you of this madness!"

Hiei found himself dragged off a few degrees to the left of Genkai's temple. Another ten minutes or so in this direction, and it would be difficult to find his way there without jumping through trees to get a bird's eye view. He jerked back on his wrist, effectively catching the girl's attention.

"What is it?" she asked sweetly, stopping and turning back to Hiei. He felt his eye twitching.

"Genkai's temple is that way," he said, pointing. Alexis turned her head and nodded.

"I know. This way is faster."

"No, this way is overgrown with—"

"Hurry up, Hiei, I can't drag you all the way there!"

Hiei glared ahead at nothing in particular. Her sole intent seemed to be to drag him all the way there; he gladly would have walked.

Regardless of methods and their effectiveness (or lack thereof), the pair did reach Genkai's temple and they did stop at the base of the stairs. Alexis looked up at them with something akin to fright.

"What is your problem?" Hiei snarled, wrenching his hand from her slack grip and rubbing his wrist. She turned to him, smiling.

"Nothing at all! Let's go, it's getting dark."

"It's barely eleven o'clock!"

"No time for specifics, sweetie, come along!"

"Do it for the fox, do it for the fox…"

Twenty minutes later, Hiei had nearly fallen asleep waiting and Alexis had barely dragged herself all the way up to the actual temple gate. The demon rolled his eyes and walked towards the door, Alexis at his heels with a sudden second wind.

"Come on, Love!" she cried, dragging him inside. How did she do that? She had just been on the verge of passing out, hadn't she? How weird…

Only three people were inside the temple, being that Kurama was at home and Yuusuke was helping Keiko at the ramen shop: Genkai, Yukina, and Kuwabara. The former busied herself with a small herb garden as the latter two sat on the floor, chatting amicably.

Alexis recoiled in disgust at the sight of one of the temple's occupants, though it was unclear which one. She shoved Hiei before her and tried to duck behind him.

"Hello, Hiei," Yukina said sweetly. "Who's that?"

Hiei dragged Alexis out from behind him and stood her in the corner. That didn't last long, but at least she wasn't clinging to him anymore. On the contrary, she bowed deeply to Yukina and knelt before the girl, taking her hands.

"Hello, Miss Yukina," she said in simpering tones. "My name is Yohaim Alexis Fernando Reinhardt Wyferon Versailles de Granvirias, but you can call me Alexis, okay? I am honored to make your acquaintance."

Hiei seethed. This girl would potentially infect his sister! Absolutely not allowed.

Kuwabara seemed more perplexed than anything else, but subtly elbowed Alexis out of the way. Taking Yukina's hand, he turned to the intrusion and extended his own hand to shake hers.

"Hello, Miss de Granvirias. My name is—"

"Kuwabara Kazuma," Alexis interrupted through gritted teeth. "I'm aware. Don't touch me, I'd rather not catch your ugly."

Kuwabara blinked and withdrew the offer, his eyes narrowed. Catch his ugly? He had never heard that one before…

Yukina looked confused and offended at the remark. Kuwabara was her best friend, after all. People could not just come to the temple and insult him for no reason!

"Excuse me, Miss de Granvirias," she said, expertly maintaining a control over her emotions, "but may I ask your business here? After all, young girls do not arrive at this temple simply to insult my friends and leave without further notice." Self-satisfied and pointedly not showing it, she turned to Hiei and smiled cheerfully. "Hello, Hiei! It's lovely to see you again—may I ask to what pleasure we owe this visit?"

"She dragged me here, somehow," Hiei explained, pointing to Alexis. "I would stay clear of her if I were you. I think her mind is faulty, but she seems to have strange abilities."

"Oh!" Yukina said, startled. "Are they dangerous? Are you hurt?"

Hiei waved off her concern. "No, not exactly. They aren't physically harmful, per say, but she has got it into her head that she is a demon, as well as a powerful detective for the Spirit World. Her 'power,' so to speak, is some sort of unbreakable grip with which to drag me all over the city, and she seems to be able to change the time of day with little effort."

"A time traveler? Oh, my, that's dangerous…"

"I don't think so, but I am convinced that she's certifiably insane and operating with the aid of another realm separate from our own."

"Have you asked Koenma to investigate?"

"We—" he said bitterly, gesturing to Alexis, "—have been down to see him, but he didn't seem to be able to do much. From what I gathered, he is largely unfamiliar with her sort, and I would rather not see him again for a probably fruitless request."

"Oh, dear…"

Hiei nodded, purposefully excluding Alexis from the conversation. She butted in, as she tended to do, taking Hiei's hands and gazing up at him with lovesick eyes.

"Are you feeling better, my love?" she asked in a sugary, patronizing voice. Kuwabara was caught between laughter and fright, and Yukina was absolutely bewildered.

"I still hate you, if that's what you mean," Hiei said sourly, trying to shake her off of him.

"Yukina!" Alexis said suddenly, turning to the petite ice maiden. "Hiei needs your help. He's under some sort of witch's spell so that he thinks he hates me! Can you free him from it?"

Yukina blinked and looked at Hiei. He shook his head tiredly and she looked back at Alexis.

"Miss de Granvirias, he doesn't seem to think he's under any spell at all."

"Of course he doesn't!" Alexis cried, sobbing. "It's the power of that damn witch! He thinks he hates me…she's trying to break us apart so our love won't become the seventh Silver Key that will open the door to Paradise!"

Hiei raised one eyebrow. That was new. He hadn't even known that Alexis thought the "witch" was any more than a bored sorceress.

"Seventh…?" Kuwabara said carefully, trying to figure out what that meant.

"Don't talk to me, Stupid," Alexis snapped, turning to Kuwabara for a moment. She turned back to Yukina, her eyes wide and teary again.

"Can you help him?"

Yukina delicately tilted her head.

"…what was that about a silver key?"

Alexis shook her head, seemingly frustrated. "Oh…never mind," she said bitterly. "Genkai, can you heal my beloved?"

Genkai turned from her herbs and flowers and nodded. "Of course. Where is he?"

"Why…right here!" Alexis said, gesturing to Hiei. Genkai shook her head.

"Really, Granvirias, where is he?"

"My name is Alexis!"

"Uh huh. Never mind then, I won't heal him."

"But he's suffering from a witch's spell!" Alexis sobbed—screamed, really, would be the word for it, but Genkai merely turned back to her plants and whistled a merry tune.

And why not? She didn't have any problems involved weird girls from other dimensions.

Sniffling and rubbing her nose in what she hoped was a pitiful-slash-beautiful way, Alexis grabbed Hiei's shoulder and pulled him out the temple door. She didn't need this—these people were clearly not going to help her, and she didn't know how much longer she could hang around Kuwabara before she caught his infectious stupidity.

"We'll find someone to fix you, my love, don't worry. Chrysanthemum won't stop our love from becoming the seventh Silver Key—we'll get into Paradise and lock her out, and everything will be fine."

With tremendous strength, willpower, and luck, Hiei wrenched his hand from Alexis' grip and punched her in the jaw.

"You get this straight," Hiei snarled in an uncharacteristic display of rage. "I don't know how you got here. As far as I know, you appeared out of nowhere and started yipping about some 'BSS' and 'infliction'—"

"'BFF,'" Alexis correctly meekly, "and 'fanfiction.'"

"Whatever! Then you drag me out of the tree I'm sitting in a start romping all over Tokyo to find my teammates, all the while making up more and more ridiculous stories about our nonexistent love life! Who in all of the hells is 'Chrysanthemum'? And what the hell are these Silver Keys you keep talking about?"

"They're—"

"It was a rhetorical question!"

Alexis nodded, her eyes downcast.

"You're not a demon, and the mix you invented is not stable enough to support life! You are not Kurama's sister, fire demons do not form bonds based on their similar energies, Spirit World has never employed you, you have never met Sensui or Hagiri, Kuwabara is not infectious, my sister is not weak or weak minded, and above all, I! Hate! You!"

"Right, because of the witch's—"

"There is no witch!"

"Then you…you tricked me?"

"I never mentioned a witch!"

Alexis looked down sadly and shook her head.

"Hiei…if you'd just been nice to me, like I read in fanfiction, and gave me presents and pretty dresses…we could have been happy together."

"That doesn't sound a little one-sided to you?" Kurama said, appearing out of nowhere. Or…walking up the stairs, but it's not important.

"No!" Alexis cried, turning around, which was a little pointless, seeing as how Kurama and Hiei were standing next to each other in front of her. "No, Kurama, we could be happy as a couple because Hiei loves me! I know he does! This is my world, too, and we're all interlocked in a web of destiny! You just…don't understand!"

Sobbing into her hands, Alexis ran down the stairs, wailing all the way. Aside from the crying, she seemed fine enough…

…until she reached the last twenty or so steps, tripped over her own ungraceful feet, and plummeted to the ground, blood spotting her forehead.

Kurama looked to his casual lover.

"Should we see if she's still alive?"

Hiei looked back and smirked devilishly.

"It would be a crime not to, wouldn't it?"

Tracing his fingers suggestively up Hiei's neck, Kurama shrugged.

"As long as there's a body to be found, I guess we could be charged with manslaughter two…"

Hiei put out his hand, called up some friendly black fire, and torched Alexis' body.

"Body?"

Kurama smiled.

"Commence casual sex."

Hiei grinned deviously.

"Let's."

and thus, the nightmare ends