It was early morning now, with thick swirling mist clinging to the shutters.

The Hellsing house was drafty and cold. As she crouched on her knees before the main fireplace, Integra concluded she was stupid at making fire. She was a very proud girl and had accomplished much in her life, but the fire wasn't going to happen. She struck the match again and again and tossed them onto the newspapers stuffed between the wood logs. The fire would burn the paper nicely, and just when the flames reached the wood and things looked like they going to get started, the promise would die as the flames shrank from the wood and sputtered out.

"This wood is inferior," Integra concluded, scratching her head.

"The wood is not inferior," Alucard scoffed. "You don't know what you're doing."

"You do it," she said, handing the matches to him.

"I can't make fire happen. Not in that fireplace."

"Jackass." Integra gathered her skirt up and crawled closed to the fireplace. Her small body could have easily fit inside it. She climbed up over the iron guard and placed a lit match between the logs, jamming in the wooden end quickly so the flames would not burn her tiny fingers. "Burn the wood, dammit." She sat back and watched.

Burn, burn, fizzle, dead.

Alucard and Integra both sat on the brick before the fireplace, making the same face. "Alucard, what am I doing wrong? The wood doesn't feel damp or anything. In fact, I think that same wood has been sitting in that grate for years."

"Yeah, I noticed that too."

"You'd think it would be dry enough to burn by now."

"You'd think. Maybe we should turn on the gas."

"The gas?"

Alucard nodded. "There's a little knob above the mantel. It's like a switch to make the room smell funny. But maybe the gas will help light the fire."

Integra got off her knees and glared at Alucard with indignation. "How long where you going to let me stay down there trying to set fake wood on fire when you knew damn well that this is a gas fireplace?"

"That wood's fake?"

"You're so full of shit. You knew the whole time. You don't put real wood in a gas fireplace." She searched around for the knob Alucard spoke of. She was too short to see where her hands where feeling but her fingers wrapped around a little metal handle. "Found it."

"Not that one," Alucard cautioned.

Too late. Suddenly a cascade of soot dropped from the chimney and covered the little girl in black film. The room was kicked up in a cloud of choking soot. Integra coughed and coughed. Alucard casually walked over and lifted her up by the armpits and walked several feet away from the fireplace and set her down again. "I don't think we're winning," he commented. He looked behind him. "That's a lot of soot."

Integra wiped her dirty glasses on the inside of her sleeve and put them back on. "Oh God," she moaned. "Father's going to kill me."

Alucard pretended he hadn't heard the comment and looked off in another direction. Integra quieted down solemnly, realizing herself. She looked up at Alucard, who looked like had hadn't been paying attention. She knew he'd heard. This was his way. She appreciated it. "Walter's going to have a fit," she corrected.

"Yes," Alucard agreed. "We should run away."

"Mmm. Excellent idea. Finger sandwiches sound great right now and the kitchen is far away. Let us sashay…"


The match burned her finger.

Sir Integra suddenly woke from her revere, a grown adult once more but once again crouching before the main fireplace on her knees with a match. "That's right," she mumbled, tossing aside the used match. "Gas." She got up and she was tall enough now to see properly. This time she selected the correct lever and she heard the pipes give and the spray of the invisible gas. She got back down on her knees and lit the match, holding it close to the face wood until it sparked and the logs flitted a blue flame. She closed the glass guard and sat back, admiring her handiwork. Such a simple thing to light a fire. But what an adventure it had once been.

"I need it."

Sir Integra's ears perked. She was not alone. "I heard. You can't have it," she responded.

"I still need it."

On one hand, she wanted to jump up and beat her nosferatu senseless. On the other hand, if she jumped up she'd pass out. Falling on the floor in the middle of a lecture might be somewhat distracting from the point. So instead, she just stood up slowly and seated herself in the mission armchair and folded her hands. "Fine. I'll try to invent a simple way to explaining how reality works to someone who doesn't live in the same reality as me. However, there's no other way I can say this. You can't HAVE it."

"I still NEED it." He stepped before her, most of his body silhouetted against the fire behind him. Sir Integra hadn't been certain she could climb all the stairs to her office, where she would have preferred to reprimand her servant in private. She'd situated herself in the foyer with intent on calling for him but, to her surprise, he came to before she called. It was as if he'd been expecting her sudden return. "You're wondering how I knew you came back?" He grinned. "I'm so hungry I can smell all the blood in this house. And I so love the taste of your blood most of all. I was drawn to you instantly."

Sir Integra was used to Alucard's mind-probing. She shrugged at him. "Alucard, do you remember that time when we were trying to light the fire in here? I never did figure out whether you were just messing with me or if you honestly didn't know how a gas fireplace worked."

"I don't think you understand how serious this is," Alucard cautioned. "You don't seem too concerned, but you should be."

Sir Integra sighed. There was no talking to him anymore. She looked past his body and gazed at the fire. "This situation is not serious. I am not concerned. Excuse the saying, but you can't squeeze blood from a stone." The flicker of flames made her want a cigar. She patted her pockets and then remembered she's still left them in her suitcase. Pity, the aroma of smoke really ought to be accompanied by the taste of a cigar. She sighed and looked back up at the vampire, who looked slightly irked at being ignored in the favor of a cigar she didn't even have. "You will go to sleep hungry."

"I will not." He kept shifting his weight from foot to foot, causing him to loll and bob his head like an animal peeking from a inside cage. "You are not a stone. There's still some blood left in you."

"Hmph. Not for you there isn't."

"You've already made me wait. You made me wait for months. I miss your blood." His eyes were darting up and down her body, fixated on her unseen arteries, his OTHEReyes following the pattern of her sea-green veins under her white skin. "You're the worst kind of tyrant, dangling food in front of the starving."

She raised an eyebrow. "You're hardly starving. And tyrants in glass houses and all…" Sir Integra could not identify Alucard's mood. She couldn't tell whether he was being difficult for the sake of being difficult or if he was dead serious. This was not unusual, sometimes it was impossible to predict his true motivations. Sometimes.

Alucard stepped closer to her, invading her personal space. "You wouldn't know if I WAS starving or not. I wouldn't give you time to figure it out. I would rip you to pieces, bond or no bond."

Sir Integra did not react. He wanted her to react. With authority, anger, fear, whatever. He wanted to upset her. Thus, she sat expressionless, hands folded casually in her lap, staring with heavily lidded, drowsy eyes as if his willfulness bored her.

He took another step closer, much closer then she would have liked. She didn't flinch. She was staring directly into his stomach now, her nose almost touching his clothes. His head was bowed, sniffing around her nape. He buried his mouth in her mane, his cold breath was making the hairs on her neck stand straight. He put his mouth close to her ears and said, "I can smell it."

"You can ALWAYS smell it." She wasn't nervous, as a person would be nervous when large predators circle. Integra had a different perception of Alucard then everyone else and she didn't see a predator before her, but a child shouting; "Pay attention to ME!" Walter had always warned Integra in the old days to never return Alucard's taunts or play his games. He, like most others, thought Alucard was too clever and too wicked to ever be trusted on even the most minimal levels. But she was his master. For her, the rules were different.

"Your move," he reminded her, seemingly anxious for any reaction.

"I don't feel like playing." She calmly raised her hand and placed her index finger on his mouth and applied pressure lightly, as if to push his entire body away with her finger. She had no control to make him move, whether he backed off or not was his own decision.

But he allowed himself to be pushed. He didn't step out of her personal space, but she did manage to push him up so that his face was away from her throat. "You'll go to bed hungry," she repeated resolutely.

He was looking down at her, pressing his hip into her shoulder. "I'll come to you when you're asleep and I'll wake you when it's time."

She couldn't suppress a smirk at this. "You will go to bed hungry. You will stay hungry."

"You'll have to lie very, very still. I have this…instinct to crush things that struggle. But I know you won't struggle." He put his hand against her back and further pressed his sharp hipbone against her chest.

She laughed at him. "And in your fantasy, am I wearing a little white chemise and a slender crucifix in the hopes that it will ward you off? Go to sleep Alucard. Go to sleep and dream..."

His voice was feverish; "Do you have one?"

"A chemise?"

"A crucifix."

Indignantly, "No, I don't have one."

His disappointment was brief, then he jumped right back to the matter at hand. "There's no reason why it has to hurt or be unpleasant for you. It could happen slowly, over several nights." As he spoke, the pressure of his hand increased, trying to push her chest against his body. Then his other hand slid down and cupped the back her head and tried to move her face against his stomach.

Integra chose not to resist at this moment. Alucard's physical actions where odd and his behavior was revealing more then his words. It wasn't so much affectionate behavior as some kind of territorial indicator, proving to her that her personal boundaries meant nothing to him. He was invading her space and letting his hands roam, daring her to tell him 'no'. Again, trying to stir her anger?

"A warm body," Alucard mused, enjoying his master compliancy. "This is what I remember."

"Let me ask you, Alucard, did you really have an accident or did you throw away the bag so that you could drink blood 'the old fashion' way?"

He hadn't even heard her. "Shallow bites," he emphasized, "They wouldn't hurt." His eyes were flaming. "I wouldn't even have to wake you up if you didn't want to. Just imagine it."

Integra pushed Alucard VERY gently. This was not a good time to initiate physical authority. He was too close to bloodlust and any sudden movement would register in his mind as an attempt to flee and the instinct to chase and catch and kill would overwhelm him. "This appeals to no one but you," she told him.

But the smile didn't go away. He didn't understand. He had all the psychic powers in the world, and he couldn't see the obvious. He didn't understand yet that he would never get what he wanted from her.

"Alucard, listen to me: no." Before he could reply, she leaned into him and pulled his cravat down so his eyes met hers. "No. Not tonight. Not ever. Stop wanting it. In a few days, when my strength is back, I'll give you a new bag if you still insist on it. But it WILL be a bag and you will never drink from my veins."

His smile vanished for a second. Then it returned. "But I want it my way. On my terms." He shifted his weight again, cocking his head playfully. "Don't you want me to be happy? Don't you want me to feel satisfied so that I'll be obedient and loyal?"

"No." Time to bring him off his high. She had discovered the answers she was looking for and she didn't have to play along anymore. "You will be obedient regardless of how you feel about it. That's what being a slave is all about."

He was leaning his face towards her neck again. He purred, "I'm a servant who works for blood, not a slave who works for nothing." He found the great vein and brushed his nose over it.

"You're a servant who does SLOPPY work when he actually chooses to do work AT ALL. I'm not impressed with you at all anymore. It's harder and harder for me to justify to myself the great expense of having you. And I have less and less enthusiasm to defend you from the Round Table whenever they start hinting they want me to get rid of you. Of course, you don't help yourself. You keep letting the Iscariot Priest get away so that you can have a playmate, and then that vampire tart slipped into this house under your very nose. You can't even manage to follow my most modest orders without displaying some great resistance to prove to me that you aren't 'broken'. I already know you're not broken but you spend so much time polishing that image I wonder if YOUknow it. And in the meantime, you're so preoccupied you can't do anything right. Now you can't even drink blood. What's wrong with you? That's like pissing on your boot. And then you come crawling to me, drooling all over my neck and you think I'm going to say, 'Help yourself, I can't resist your charms'?"

Alucard straightened up and took a step back to compose himself. "Insult me all you like. You couldn't run this organization without me."

She was leaning forward now, and Alucard was leaning slightly back, retreating from her space. "Actually, I could. Now run along before I starting imagining ways to downsize this organization."

"Then if I'm such liability and you don't need me, why don't lock me up? Or exterminate me along with the filth? It's because you can't…"

"You drank the blood I gave you."

"Don't change the subject."

"You did! You drank the blood bag. I think the blood all over Seres's uniform was regular donor blood from that huge spill in the freezer that she refuses to comment about. You aren't out from under my control at all, you're just playing that you are. You wanted an excuse to come sniffing around me, blame it on your hunger, but what you really wanted was to see if you could make me submit to your will. You wanted me to let you drink my blood."

Alucard was just standing there. "You're flattering yourself."

"Seres is terrible at lying," Sir Integra said. "She hasn't had as much experience at it as you."

"There was an accident."

"There was no accident. This is just another game in a series of games you play to keep yourself entertained at my expense. Just look at me." Integra raised her shaking hands. Her body was still exhausted from the previous blood letting. And of course, she had not recovered at all. "Look at what you're doing to me. This is how my father died. This is how I will die someday. This is how YOU will die." She rested in hands on her lap. "The joke is on you. If you think hurrying my death along will reap benefits for you, it will not. I don't think you understand the fate that awaits you if I die because of something you've done."

The playfulness was gone from the vampire. He didn't sway, but stood stiff. "You're poor immunity is not my doing. And it was not my idea to bind me to your family's blood. This method of control was devised by your ancestors, and I'm sure you would understand that I was quite opposed to it."

"Bullshit. You love it. The way you wait with such anticipation for my blood every year… Tell me, do you relive the murder of the virgins through the taste, or do you love to feel the leash tighten around your throat?"

"And in your fantasy, do I whimper when you force me to my knees? Do I submit bound, gagged, broken?"

Sir Integra glared. "No, Alucard. That's what happens in the real world."

They continued to stare at each other.

"So are you going to tell me what kind of accident you had with the blood bag? Or are you going to drop this pathetic story and admit you were lying to me?"

Alucard stood before her. "You use the word pathetic to describe me a lot. And in your mind, you compare me with a child."

"You are a child. You're a five hundred year old child. Someone else's child that I can't put over my knee, a child that runs wild through my house and breaks things. And yet I'm responsible for you, I have to take care of you, I have to feed you and you're all the more spoiled for it. What I wouldn't give to just leave you high on a mountain peak or push your cradle out to sea, but I can't. I'm stuck with you."

"Are you going to tell me why you keep me if you don't want me then?"

"Excuse me, Sir Integra?" Walter hadn't walked into the foyer so much as he simply APPEARED there, much like a vampire himself. Sir Integra had been so focused on the vampire, she jumped at this abrupt intrusion. Both the woman and the vampire stared at the old servant. "Ma'am," Walter pressed, looking a bit uncomfortable himself, "a moment?"

"Yes," Sir Integra stammered, feeling the dizziness go to her head. She gestured to Alucard. "Just go." But he had already gone. For a moment, she thought her fuzzy vision was playing tricks on her, but the vampire had indeed disappeared as soon as she'd been distracted.

She sighed. "Walter? Do you remember this one time when this room was full of soot?"

"I remember something like that, yes, Sir Integra."

"Did I ever tell you that was something I did?"

"No, you never did."

"Mmm." She stared at the fire. "Well, I did it. I was trying to light a fire in the fireplace and I pulled the wrong lever. Then I ran away." She smiled. "I'm sorry." She looked down at her ungloved hands, at her short fingernails. She used to bite her nails. "Alucard was there with me. He used to do things like that, just watch me do everything. I think he was insane after so many years sitting in the dark by himself, he just had to get his nose into everything I did. It was really fun back then, like I had an accomplice. It was so Bonnie and Clyde. I can't remember when he stopped."

Walter stood by and said nothing.

Sir Integra continued. "I went through this peanut butter and banana sandwich stage. I'd cut them up into little pieces. He used to eat them. He didn't like them, he just ate them because they were mine and I'd yell at him and he'd be so delighted." She looked up at Walter. "I'm sorry, what did you want?"

"Nothing, Sir Integra. I just…wanted to see if everything was okay."

Sir Integra frowned. "I was in the middle of a good lecture. I wish you hadn't interrupted."

"Your face was getting red ma'am, and I know how fragile your health is right now. I thought maybe you should rest before going at him so harshly."

"I wasn't being harsh," Sir Integra said defensively. "He must learn that he cannot behave however he wants. He must learn to obey without objection. Alucard was completely out of line last night, his behavior was inexcusable and he needed to be reprimanded and punished. This kind of conduct cannot be forgiven. You had no place to…"

Walter casually pointed in the direction in the direction Alucard had been standing. "Tell him that."

"I WAS telling him that. I could have had it all done by now, but I'll have to find him later and start all over again just to get to my point…"

"No. You were telling he was a pathetic incompetent and terrible at doing his job, but you made no mention of his actions last night. He wasn't even on the job last night and you still focused on it. And you never even touched upon the poor maid, the biggest offense of the evening." He took a breath. "And that comment about…the mountain top and pushing him out to sea…I found that quite disturbing. The imagery gave me a chill."

"So what?"

"I think he found it disturbing too."

"I want him to find it disturbing, don't you understand? I need to combat his disturbing comments about coming after me in my sleep with SOMETHING. He's not going to get away with talking to me like that. And furthermore, Walter," she seethed, putting extra emphasis on his name, "I'm not 14. I'm not looking for advice on how to control that monster anymore. I have it down. Just look how he fled."

"Ma'am? If you hate him so much, why DON'T you get rid of him? Or lock him away, as your father did?"

She looked back at the flames. "I will one day."