Note: I do not own any of these characters. They are the property of Gregory Maguire.
A boy of sixteen years old sat huddled in the dark closet.
"Sweet Oz...Liir," Elphaba exclaimed softly.
He had lost a lot of weight but overall looked healthy. He slowly stood and walked past her into the room. He stared at Fiyero, Boq, and Glinda. There was something familiar about his face, but Glinda couldn't figure out what. She studied him and slowly it dawned on her.
"Fiyero, he looks just like you," she commented.
Elphaba groaned. She turned to face her friends but couldn't look Fiyero in the eye.
"Could you excuse us for a little while?" Fiyero asked Boq and Glinda.
Boq nodded and attempted to drag Glinda out of the room. She reluctantly followed. Fiyero exhaled slowly before facing Elphaba and Liir.
"Is there something you'd like to tell me?" he asked her.
She couldn't answer. The hurt in his eyes made it difficult for her to find the right words, to explain why she hadn't told him.
"Fiyero I...," she began, fumbling with her emotions. She walked over to Liir and put her hands on his shoulders. He flinched slightly, unused to being touched. Elphaba winced. She had been like that once. "This is your son."
Fiyero pushed back his blonde hair. "And when were you planning on telling me about our son?" he inquired with a slight edge to his voice.
"I didn't tell you about Liir because I thought he had been taken by the Gale Force and killed. You had already lost three children. I didn't want to add another death to that list."
Fiyero sighed. "Did Sarima know?"
Elphaba shook her head. "She never gave me the chance. I felt she had a right to know, but she was too distraught over your death. Well, when we thought you were dead."
"You're my father?" Liir had spoken for the first time, startling them both.
"Yes. And I'm sorry I couldn't be a part of your life until now," he said, truly meaning it.
"And Nor, Manek, and Irji were my siblings?"
Elphaba nodded.
"Why didn't you tell me?" he demanded, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. Elphaba struggled to hold back her own.
"You were so young, and I didn't think you would fully understand. I couldn't even tell Sarima. How could I have told you?" she answered.
"You could have at least told me you were my mother. Manek had to enlighten me to that fact," he remarked sarcastically.
"I know I have never been particularly maternal toward you Liir, but I never neglected your basic needs. I was a very sick woman at the time. I never meant to harm you." Elphaba told him, her voice straining with emotion.
Liir could only glare at her, the glare was all too familiar. "Well you have neglected a very crucial need. True, I had food to eat, clothing to wear, and a place to live. But I didn't have love. I was treated like a necessary evil. Only dealt with because I was there, and you couldn't get rid of me. Why couldn't you love me?" he demanded as tears welled up in his eyes.
Elphaba hung her head. "I couldn't even love myself then," she responded in a barely audible whisper. "All my life I had been hated. No one loved me so how could I love back? But I am learning and it's all because of your father."
She held Fiyero's hand tightly in hers. Liir crossed his arms and shifted nervously. He had never liked seeing his mother sad. She hadn't been terrible. He could have been completely ignored.
"I'm sorry Mom."
It was the first time he had addressed her as such and was surprised at the ease with which it was said. Elphaba's face reflected her shock. She was rendered speechless for a moment.
"It's ok. You have every right to be angry," she said. "I promise to try to be a better mother from now on because I do love you. I just needed to learn how to show it."
She looked Fiyero in the eye and said, "I owe you an apology for not telling you about Liir. It was a very confusing time for me. I was in a daze for most of it. It didn't even matter because I thought you had been killed and..."
She would have continued if Fiyero hadn't brought his mouth down roughly on hers. When he finally ended the kiss Elphaba sighed.
"I was babbling again, wasn't I?"
"Yes, you were," Fiyero chuckled softly.
"As long as I'm in a repentant mood I want to make a quick stop before we leave," said Elphaba. She opened the door into the hallway. Glinda nearly toppled onto the floor at the unexpected action.
"I tried to keep her away Elphie," said Boq. Elphaba could only glare at her bubbly, blonde friend.
"I was going to find out anyway. I figured I would save you the trouble of repeating it," she responded huffily. Elphaba softened at her friend's indignant face. She rubbed her temple with her hand.
"Well, I guess I won't have to introduce our son then," she said.
"I know who you are Miss Glinda but I don't know who he is," Liir said, indicating Boq.
"My name is Boq. Your parents and I went to school together," He shook the boy's hand.
"Now that we're all acquainted we should get going. You can all go ahead. There's something I have to do first," Elphaba said.
She turned and reentered the room. In the far corner was a small staircase which she quickly descended. At the bottom of the stairs was another door. Elphaba ducked into the small chapel that lay behind it and knelt in front of the altar. For a while she was simply still, appreciating the tranquility. She was never one to pray but her years at the mauntery had taught her as much. This time would be different. This time she wouldn't be reciting from memory, she would be speaking from her heart. After taking a deep breath she began.
"Thank you to whatever being or spirit is watching over my pathetic existence. Thank you for keeping the few friends that I have safe. I am more grateful than words can express that Fiyero and Liir are alive. I don't know what I would have done without them." She paused to collect her thoughts. "If you can hear me Nessa, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for disappearing and leaving you alone at Shiz. I wasn't a very good sister in that regard, and I regret that more than you could ever know. If I could live my life over again I would change so many things. Every decision I've made has ended in disaster although, I think my luck is changing. I miss you terribly. You should be here right now. That wretched farm girl almost ruined everything that I care about. But she also made me realize that I had to deal with my grief. That's why I'm talking to you now. You must be thrilled that I'm finally in a chapel of my own free will."
Elphaba smiled a little before her eyes started to fill up with painful tears. She broke down as the heaving sobs racked her body. She was almost about to wipe the offending moisture off her face when she felt a hand on her shoulder.
"Here, use this," Fiyero said softly.
He handed her a handkerchief. She accepted it with a small smile before burying her face into his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her tightly and rubbed her back soothingly.
"So much for that," Fiyero laughed softly.
They sat for a while in silence, gently rocking back and forth. Eventually, her crying stopped, and her breathing evened out.
"Better?" asked Fiyero.
Elphaba nodded and wiped the last of the liquid assassins from her eyes. "This was Irji's favorite place. The whole time I lived here he would be here most of the time. I never understood why he loved it so much until now. It's so beautiful."
He nodded in agreement. Fiyero had always enjoyed being there just before dawn. He loved to watch the colored light from the stained glass creep across the stone floor, bringing it to life. Elphaba rose and started toward the door.
"Are you sure you're ok?" Fiyero asked.
"I'm fine now," she responded before returning to him. She kissed him sweetly. "Let's go join the others," she said. They left the chapel and ascended the stairs.
Thanks again to sweet saturn for beta reading!!
