Each individual chapter will have a different rating, different pairings, different spoilers, and a different setting and timeline. Multiple people were involved in writing this fic, I do not claim to have written anything other than my own characters. I do however claim to have come up with the plot, story idea, and organizing it all. The others who write characters in this fic are well aware that I am posting it, and contribute willingly. This fic is an ongoing project with an unknown number of parts, with alternate storyline as of the fifth laboratory incident. Enjoy!
Desperation
Rating:R (For sex, what else?)
Pairings: HavocxEd
Disclaimer: I don't own FMA.
Spoilers: Noooooone!
Setting: Central HQ.
Timeline: Smut.
It was a night attack, and the desert air had turned cold. Stars glittered, cold and uncaring, in the clear skies.
Sand crunched beneath his platoon's feet as they rushed to the site under attack. Sharp cries and gunfire only accentuated the need and haste required. Orders were given. They were to spread out in a flanking maneuver, spread their lines thin.
The veterans knew this was ridiculous, a perfect way to get all of them killed. The rookies, young, green recruits obeyed the orders to the letter, forcing the line thinly.
They rushed the hotspot, but no one really had any time to attack before gunfire tore them to shreds.
Havoc hit the sand, checking the pulse of the kid next to him. Dead as a rock.
Bullets hit him from behind, tearing through his left lung, inches from his heart. Blood bubbled up into his mouth and nose, making it nearly impossible to breathe. He'd drown in a matter of minutes.
But he wasn't going down without a fight, unlike the poor sods around him. He went for his sidearm and got two shots into an approaching attacker.
"Too late..." Knives slashed across his throat from behind, severing the main artery and vein.
He knew he was dead as soon as he felt the icy steel dig into his skin.
Havoc woke up with a strangled cry, toppling off the windowsill.
Ed woke with a start at the cry, practically jumping from his spot to Havoc's side before he was even fully aware of what he was doing.
Havoc cursed so creatively and violently (in three different languages, no less) that the paint nearly peeled from the walls.
He rubbed his shoulder, which he had banged in his undignified sprawl. "Oh, for... talk about nightmares..."
He touched the scars at his throat, just checking to see that they were closed and healed. It was stupid, he knew. But it was one of those irrational fears that every single soldier had after being wounded in combat.
"You okay?" It was a stupid question, and Ed knew it, but it was the only thing that came to mind.
Havoc baited at the sound of Ed's voice, shrinking into a defensive position. "Don't touch me!" he spat as the young man extended a hand.
Edward winced, but refused to back away, edging closer as one hand gently rested on Havoc's back. "It's just me..."
Havoc tensed at the touch of Ed's hand, vision temporarily going blood red. Slamming his fist into the wall, he snarled, "No!". But whether it was to Ed or his own... reaction he wasn't sure.
A spider web crack blossomed from the impact of his fist.
The younger boy cringed, but the hand on Havoc's back didn't leave, instead slowly rubbing. "Jean..."
"They say I'm a perfect chimera," Havoc whispered bitterly, tears beginning to fall from his richly colored eyes. "I have my memories, my heart, everything I had before. I'm nearly human. But those stupid memories... the feel of cold steel at my throat... those bullets tearing through my lung... drowning in my own blood... the sheer hopeless despair of knowing my own death was staring me in the face... no one should have to remember what it felt like to be killed.
"To make it worse... my body wants to kill anything that makes it remember..."
"I know what it feels like to die... I remember it every time I sleep... it's faded a bit... but it's still there..." Ed scooted up next to Havoc, wrapping his arms around the older man's waist. "You're right... nobody should have to know that..."
"It hasn't faded... it'll never fade, not for me." He rested his forehead against the back of his hand. "I don't want to live like this, worrying that I'm going to kill you whenever you touch me. I don't want to have to dance around your feelings to see if you're going to go into shock again."
His shoulders began to heave with sobs.
"We're alive now and that's what matters, Jean! Some twist of fate has given us another chance, why waste it?" Edward nipped lightly at Havoc's left side, where he knew the scar was. "It takes time for these things to go away... it's still relatively new..."
"So says the young man who begged me to kill him a few hours ago," he whispered sadly.
At the gentle nip, Havoc's oversensitive skin shuddered, sending a muted message of pleasure up to his brain.
"I said the same thing to Al... it just slips out... I'm not quite myself then..." Edward nipped again, a little harder this time.
"I'm assuming this is along the lines of what you wanted to do the first time you came in," he said weakly.
His entire body was screaming SEX at him.
Dammit, when did Ed figure out this is how to drive me nuts?
Ed sighed, nipping lower on Havoc's side through the thin fabric of his shirt. "I don't know what I wanted to do when I came in here the first time, honestly..." His voice was a bit dreamy.
Havoc let out a low, growling purr. He turned over, pulling Ed down for a kiss.
Ed was quick to comply, arms moving up from Havoc's waist to his neck. He tilted his head slightly, tongue slipping into the kiss not long after.
"This is what you want, right?" Havoc nuzzled Ed's neck, licking briefly at the smooth skin.
Ed shuddered at the feeling of a slightly rough tongue against his skin, moaning softly.
"Nnnngh..." Not much of a reply, but Edward managed to nod once ever so slightly.
"Oh, come on Ed," Havoc growled playfully, biting the young man's neck lightly. He licked the tiny marks. "Don't make me do all the work again... you're old enough to play..."
He kissed Ed, teasingly and lightly.
Ed's eyes opened partially to glance down at Havoc, and he dipped his head to return the older man's teasing gesture, lips and tongue trailing along his jaw line and down his neck, nipping at the diagonal slash scars lightly as he shifted his position to straddle Havoc's waist.
The braided alchemist sighed against the Lieutenant's neck, nuzzling his head there. "Not going to make me leave your shirt on, are you?" the boy mumbled against the crook of Havoc's neck.
Defensive instinct? Hello? Where did you go?
Out to Lunch.
...figures.
"Why would I do a thing like that? You've seen me... you didn't run this time... all's right with the world..." He lidded his eyes, the blue-green seeming even more intense than usual. Reaching up, he began to unbutton the shirt.
"Nnn..." Ed traced the vein in Havoc's neck with the tip of his tongue, hands sliding beneath his shirt and over his shoulders to expose the skin under fabric. Light nips and licks trailed down, along his collarbone slowly, following down with each release of a button.
"Ahhh..." Havoc arched up into the youth's touch, purring deep in his throat.
Affection, desire, want, need, trust... all those and more shone in burning blue-green eyes.
Golden eyes flicked up to look at Havoc's face as Ed's tongue slowly traced the center line down between firm abs, dipping into the curve of his navel to curl back out and up again. Fingers glided over dampened skin with a feather light touch, down Havoc's sides, and Edward brushed his lips over a pert nipple, teeth grazing gently against skin.
"Nnnngg..." Try as he might, he couldn't form coherent words, much less coherent thought. His massively oversensitive body luxuriated in the sensuous treatment, but it was wreaking havoc on his ability to think.
Edward sat up then, after pushing Havoc's shirt down around his elbows, and stretched out of his own shirt, tossing it aside. His hands rested for only a moment on the older man's shoulders before trailing down to rub all the way down his sides as Ed leaned over again, capturing his mouth with his own. Hands running along well-muscled arms, Ed didn't even notice when he slid one leg in between Havoc's thighs during the kiss.
A soft whimpering moan escaped Havoc's throat, even as his hands twined possessively through Ed's hair.
A sparkle of lavender flitted across golden irises, quickly hidden behind closed eyes, Ed's control slipping for a fraction of a second upon hearing those sounds as his hips rocked slightly, eliciting moans from both parties and breaking the kiss, though their mouths were still close enough to almost touch.
Havoc circled his arms around Ed's neck, gently biting into his shoulder. "Mine..." he whispered.
Edward groaned slightly and nibbled on Havoc's ear. "Nnn...yeah..." he purred, nipping not quite so lightly just beneath his ear, hands sliding down Havoc's body, thumbs hooking under the waistband of military pants and tugging lightly.
Havoc let his head fall back, a soft sound sighing out.
Whatever you want... and I'll just ask you for more...
Ed slid backwards slightly, sitting on Jean's knees, (Hmm...oddly familiar, isn't it?) and lightly brushing his right hand across the fabric of his pants, undoing the clasp and zipper in one swift movement.
He reached back then, tugging off his and Havoc's boots and tossing them aside before leaning back down and tugging again at the pants, nipping affectionately at Havoc's hipbone. Ed's tongue traveled back from there up his abdomen, distracting while he removed the other's pants.
Slightly cool automail fingers danced back up Havoc's left leg, along the underside of a calf, towards the inside of a bare thigh, cutting off before it got too close, teasingly. Edward moved down again, pausing to nibble just below Havoc's navel as his braid fell over his shoulder, the tip of it brushing right there.
Havoc arched at the teasing touch, baring long sharp teeth at the pleasure of it.
"Goddamn... little... gopher..." he managed. Barely.
"Don't see you doing anything about it..." Ed purred in response, violet flecked golden eyes taking in the lean, tanned body beneath him, tongue darting out to lick at his lips in anticipation at how utterly edible Jean looked right now... gods!
His human hand reached up, trailing ever so lightly down Havoc's side, following the subtle arch of his back. Automail fingers slid back upwards, settling at the small of Havoc's back, gently supporting his hips just slightly off the floor as his other hand dipped beneath the last thing that kept Jean from open air.
Lithe fingers ghosted tauntingly close, only to flit away again before reaching their supposed target, moving back to tug down lightly on the fabric to reveal another inch of tanned skin. Eyes half closed, Ed ran his tongue along the top of Havoc's hipbone, absently tugging the fabric down further as his eyes closed completely and he simply relished in the taste of Havoc's skin.
Havoc's breathing hitched, then nearly stopped altogether. Several incoherent thoughts swirled around his head, culminating in a helpless, breathy squeak.
It had been three years. Three long, very frustrating years.
Golden eyes peered lazily up through thick lashes and a sparse veil of scattered blond strands, a grin coming to Ed's face. Tugging the fabric down from around Jean's waist, he adjusted his position again, now straddling just above the other man's waist.
Edward smirked to himself as he leaned back to finish removing the garment, a firm, warm hardness pressing against his lower back due to his own movements. He tossed the article aside carelessly and sat back up, grinning down at Jean and scooting back just far enough for taut leather to brush against what his back had just seconds before and he groaned just slightly, increasingly aware of just how tight that leather was.
Two neurons managed to fire through the haze and Havoc's eyes snapped open. The blue-green in his eyes was only a thin ring around infinite black.
"Dammit Ed," he growled weakly, pulling the young man up for a fierce, possessive kiss. "If you want to screw me senseless, just do it! It's been three fucking years!" He bit into Ed's shoulder, not even bothering to be careful about his teeth, and moved his hips up.
Ed issued a sharp cry, pleasure mixed with pain as he felt sharp teeth pierce skin. He pulled back, vaguely registering the pain as teeth were not so gently removed from his shoulder, and he winced only shortly before unfastening his own pants and pulling them off.
There was a slight pause and Ed's eyelids fluttered momentarily as he felt the rush of air. Then he was pulling Havoc towards him, upright, kissing him like it was the first time and similarly the last.
He parted from Havoc's lips after a moment, panting, as he rolled off of the older man's lap to support his back against the wall, head tilted to the side slightly to look at the slightly feline, more than a hundred percent luscious, tanned body next to him.
"Equivalent... trade ... huh, Jean...?" A grin slid onto Edward's face as he absently licked his fingers to catch the faint hint of salt and the musky scent of arousal, looking at Havoc expectantly.
Havoc slithered up to Ed, facing him with a highly predatory look in his eyes. "Shove the whole alchemy bit," he advised, tongue running over the younger man's lower lip.
He dipped his head, licking away the little dribbles of blood running from the two marks in Ed's shoulder. As he did that, he ran his claws down from the teen's opposite shoulder to below his hip – lightly, not even leaving a mark on smooth skin.
"Force of-nnnh-habit..." Ed hissed in a breath, only to have it catch sharply at the sensation of claws raking down bare skin, arching into the touch as it went lower.
The golden braid that was normally so tidy had all but fallen apart now, wispy strands cascading down around his face, tickling his shoulders. Human hand twined fingers into short, tawny hair, automail tracing Havoc's spine as Edward dipped his head to bite gently at the elder's neck, licking over the slightly reddened flesh to soothe irritation away.
The more he felt these human sensations, the more Ed felt alive... and the more he was reminded that it had been three years... and that three years was a really, really long time... and oh god it felt so good to be held again like this!
Havoc purred happily at the hand running down his spine; he was human enough to know what the touch signified, but he was feline enough to enjoy being petted. Even if it wasn't exactly like being petted like a housecat...
He tucked his head into the curve of Ed's neck and shoulder, breathing deeply of the boy's unique scent.
Ed swallowed hard, tilting his head back against the wall. He shifted his position slightly, letting out a faint whimper as the hand on Havoc's head applied a gentle pressure urging him lower. The younger boy was doing all he could to be patient, but the aching in his groin was wearing his patience very thin.
Havoc ignored Ed's insistent urging, responding to a dim feeling of revenge. He kissed his way up the side of the boy's neck, then licking along Ed's jaw. "Magic word?"
"Nnnnnrghh!" Frustrated slightly, and reminiscent of a certain very very long train ride, Ed dipped his head to reach Havoc's lips, claiming them roughly before pulling away. "I'm a lot more skilled in the art of temptation now than I was then, Jean... I could do so many things to make you beg it's not even funny... but your old tactics won't work quite as well anymore, care to try something a bit more... bold?" Throughout his little speech, Ed's voice remained surprisingly calm, though tempting and coy.
Cool automail brushed lightly against the inside of Havoc's thigh, and then higher, a teasingly light touch that was gone in an instant. "Soo...do you want me or not, Jean...?" Ed purred.
Havoc grinned, rather cattishly. "You flatter yourself, Ed." His hand mimicked what the boy's did seconds earlier, though his stayed just a few moments longer. "I highly doubt that you could make me lose control..." He leaned closer. "As for wanting you... well..." His lips caught Ed's lightly and sweetly, a drastic departure from their earlier kisses.
Ed moaned softly against Havoc's lips, willpower all but melting away under the lingering touch.
"I'm-ah- not...nnnh...flattering myself-dammit- Jean..." Really, he wasn't...he could do those things if he wanted to...it was just that right now...he didn't really care...
"I'll take your word for it..." Havoc murmured, nipping lightly at the side of his neck. "But by all means, you're welcome to prove it."
Another brushing touch, and a hand running up the boy's back. But this time, he kept his hand there.
Edward reflexively arched his back away from the slightly cool touch, breath hitching in his throat as his skin rubbed against Havoc's other hand. "Jean, please..." He whispered breathily, more strongly reinforcing the plea with a downward push against the other man's head, automail fingers rubbing slowly up and down his spine.
The blond alchemist let out a slight whimper, barely rocking his hips.
Havoc's purr doubled in intensity, and it kept going as he obeyed Ed's silent plea. And it didn't let up.
Ed gasped and moaned slowly when Havoc complied, fingers further tangling themselves in his hair as his hips jerked forward of their own volition. "Nnnnngh... Jeannn..."
Havoc nipped the inside of the younger man's thigh lightly. His eyebrows lifted humorously. "You called?"
Edward shifted his hips just slightly, gritting his teeth to keep from thrusting forward when Havoc's cheek lightly pressed against that spot...damn it was hard not to just move and give up control to desire. "Please..." He said it again, voice barely in check and pleading with need and want.
Havoc lightly trailed fingertips (with the claws sheathed) down Ed's leg. "What about me?" he said, teasing. Honestly, he fully intended to give Ed what he wanted, but he didn't see why he should make it easy.
Shuddering at the lightness of the touch and the taunting tone in Havoc's voice, Ed swallowed forcefully and collected himself momentarily.
"You don't think... I wouldn't have already... thought about-" he hissed slightly, "-that... do you, Jean?" The younger's lips quirked into an awkward grin, as gold eyes gazed down listlessly at blue-green.
Havoc yawned slightly, a cat's way of showing disbelief. "I'm sure... Tell me, do you honestly have two functioning brain cells to rub together right now?"
Lazily, one claw slid out of a pad, and he gently tickled Ed's hip with it, keeping the skin unbroken. "And if you don't answer correctly..." he let the sentence hang, semi-ominously.
"Nnnnrrrgh..." Ed tried to be coherent... really... he just didn't do a very good job at it.
Instead of trying again, he simple let out a whimper.
"Good boy," Havoc purred, obviously amused. Having got the correct answer, he proceeded to fulfill Ed's... desires...
Any coherence that Ed had been trying to maintain simply melted away, lost in Havoc's mouth. He moaned, fingers tightening their grip in the other man's hair, subtle applications of pressure guiding his movements.
It wasn't long before Ed momentarily lost control and thrust into Jean's throat.
... follow your bliss, Ed.
There was a brief moment of searing clarity as sharp teeth grazed oversensitive skin and Edward yelped, reflexively yanking back on Jean's hair to pull his head back up.
Realizing his roughness, the young alchemist released his firm grip, gently massaging Jean's scalp with his fingertips as he used his automail hand to lift the man's chin. Head spinning with the even more demanding rush of desire, Ed leaned down and kissed Havoc passionately.
This time, he didn't just taste like cigarettes...
Pulling away and panting slightly, he managed to force out the words. "Turn around..."
Havoc shook his head minutely, trying to work out the strain involved in the abrupt whiplash. He obeyed Ed's order out of habit – he mind felt so fuzzy that it was doubtful he could think for himself.
With carefully controlled movements, Ed nudged Havoc forward onto his hands' support, rubbing his fingertips over the other man's shoulders and down his back, hands settling to hold his hips.
Pushing himself up onto his knees, Edward sidled up behind Jean, pressing into him as slowly as he could force himself to, so as to decrease the amount of pain it would cause. Hands gripped Havoc's hips tighter, biting his lower lip to keep from crying out at the sensation of being buried in such a tight heat that it made his head spin with giddiness and pleasure.
Havoc wiggled a bit at the half-remembered sensation. He hissed a bit, unused to the pain and wishing Ed would move his left hand just a few more inches to the right...
Swallowing hard, his entire body trembling faintly with anticipation, Ed pulled back out slowly, not quite all the way.
After pausing just a moment hovering on the edge, he entered again, fully this time, gradually setting an excruciatingly slow rhythm, groaning slightly. It was torturously slow, but remembering vaguely what happened the last time he caused Havoc pain, Ed opted to give the man time to relax before fucking him senseless.Please review, constructive criticism and questions appreciated, flames will be deflected back at you by Roy. n.n;
