Star Trek Voyager characters are the property of Paramount Pictures.

CHAPTER THIRTY SEVEN

PROVIDENCE

Part One

Music, laughter and chatter filled a small hall in Bloomington Community center as friends and family gathered to celebrate Silvie and Stevie's first birthday. Pink and blue balloons hung from the ceiling and a sparkling silver and gold banner reading "Happy First Birthday Silvia & Silvesta" glittered on the wall. There were two long tables of food at one side of the room and chairs and tables at the other for those who wanted to sit, and Harry and his band were playing cheerful music in a brightly lit corner as people continued to arrive.

Gretchen and Edward proudly showed off Silvie and Stevie while Kathryn walked through the crowd, welcoming everyone tother for those who wanted to sit, and Harry and his band were playing cheerful music in a brightly lit corner as people continued to arrive.

Gretchen and Edward proudly showed off Silvie and Stevie while Kathryn walked through the crowd, welcoming everyone to the party and embracing old friends. Almost all the former members of Voyager's crew were present, and Kathryn was overjoyed at seeing them all again. Even Tuvok and his wife were present, having made their way from Vulcan especially for the occasion.

"B'Elanna," Kathryn cried when she saw her former Chief Engineer enter the hall with Admiral Paris and his wife.

"Captain..." B'Elanna smiled as Kathryn bridged the gap between them. "I mean Admiral..."

Kathryn took the younger woman in her arms and embraced her warmly. "It's so good to see you. So good..." This was the first time she had seen B'Elanna since they had returned. She, Tom and Miral were now living on Boreth.

"You too..."

Kathryn drew away. "How is your mother? It's so wonderful that you found her."

"She's very well, thank you," B'Elanna replied. "But we didn't bring her with us. She wanted to stay on Boreth."

Kathryn looked around. "And just where are Tom and Miral?"

"On their way, Admiral. They..."

Just as she spoke, Tom came in with Miral.

"Right on cue, Mr Paris," Kathryn smiled.

"Miral had a call of nature just before we were about to come in," Tom explained. He took Kathryn's hand in his and shook it. "Good to see you again, Admiral."

"You too, Tom," Kathryn smiled. She put her hand to Miral's cheek. "And you little lady." She turned to B'Elanna. "Isn't it amazing how fast they grow?"

"Not fast enough," Tom teased.

"How are you both finding life on Boreth?"

"Great," B'Elanna replied. "But we won't be staying on there indefinitely. We feel that Earth can offer Miral more opportunities, so we plan to return before she starts school." She paused, and hesitated with the next words. "I don't suppose you've heard anything from Chakotay?"

Kathryn lowered her eyes at the sound of his name. "Nothing," she replied.

"It haunts me what happened," B'Elanna said quietly. "I can't help think we should have found another way. Leaving him like that it... it seems so wrong..."

Kathryn made no reply. She just turned in the direction of the food and gestured to the tables in the distance. "There's a buffet prepared with all kinds of food so please, help yourselves. Excuse me..."

With that she left, leaving B'Elanna to regret her words, and disappeared into the crowd. Tears momentarily blurred her vision, but she fought to suppress them.

"Admiral..."

It was the Doctor. Kathryn turned to him. "Doctor..."

"I was just having a most pleasant discussion with your Aunt Martha when the answer to our spider problem came to me."

His words unintentionally lifted her melancholy and she couldn't help smile. "It couldn't have been all that pleasant a conversation if your mind was wandering, Doctor."

"No," he said, anxious to correct a wrong impression. "That's not what I meant. It was something she said about holograms that got me thinking..." He paused. "I'm sure we can use a combination of holographic technology and living mammal tissue and fluid to allow the spiders to reproduce."

Kathryn considered this. "It sounds theoretically possible." She paused. "But I'm still not sure it would be wise to allow the spiders to reproduce. They killed Garl and put several people in hospital. We're extremely lucky none of them got into our habitat. If they had, they could have killed thousands."

"But they are a unique lifeform," the Doctor replied. "We can't just let them die. So long as they reproduce in a controlled environment, they will be no danger to anyone."

"Well," Kathryn replied. "All I can say is that your idea sounds good in theory. It won't, of course, be up to me whether or not you'll get permission to experiment as it's not my field."

The Doctor was about to respond when Kathryn's attention was taken by someone approaching her.

"Seven," Kathryn said happily when she saw the former drone. "I'm glad you could make it..."

Seven was dressed in a blue catsuit, but was wearing a smart black jacket over it. Her aunt, Irene, was beside her, dressed in a very bright floral dress and a pink hat.

"Anneka," Irene said, "she is called Anneka now." The woman reached into a pink bag she was holding and pulled out two small boxes. "For Silvia and Silvesta," she said kindly. "Just something little to mark the occasion."

Kathryn took the gifts. "Thank you very much." She then turned to Seven. "I haven't seen you since we got back. I've missed you..."

"Anneka has been very busy," Irene answered. "And I thought it would be good for her to cut all ties with the Voyager crew for a while. The poor dear has had nothing but space and starships since she was a little girl. It's time she learned there is more to life."

Kathryn knew the woman meant well, but she couldn't help feel rather angry at those words. Seven had been part of much more than just a crew, and had made good friends on Voyager who really cared about her.

"She can do that without severing all contact with her friends," Kathryn replied, her tone sharper than she intended. "I care about Seven, Anneka, as do others..." She turned to Seven. "You must come to stay with me for a few days. I once promised you a tour of my hometown and I always keep my promises."

"I would like that," Seven replied.

Irene began to protest. "It really isn't a good for you too..."

Kathryn interrupted. "Your niece will never find her true self if you stifle her."

"I only have Anneka's best interests at heart," Irene replied, her tone a little subdued. "She has been through a horrific ordeal in her life and I want her to recover as much of her humanity as is possible. She is Anneka Hanson, not Seven of Nine. I don't want her to keep returning to an environment where she is Seven of Nine again."

At this, Kathryn's manner softened. "I understand. But she has never been a Borg drone to me, she has always been Anneka Hanson." She smiled. "I will be only too glad to welcome Anneka Hanson into my home."

"In that case," Irene smiled, "I will be happy for Anneka to come and stay with you. But we're going away in a couple of weeks time to stay with some relatives in Denmark. We won't be back for a couple of months."

Kathryn smiled. "My invitation has no time limit."

"Perhaps I can come at the end of summer," Seven said. "I won't be starting medical school until September."

Seven's words took Kathryn by surprise. "I didn't know you were going to medical school. What made you decide to become a doctor?"

"Many reasons," Seven replied. "If I wish to return to Starfleet in the future, I can serve as a physician on a ship. If I don't want to return to Starfleet, I can pursue a career in medicine elsewhere." She paused. "I also believe that going to medical school will help my personal growth."

Suddenly, the sound of silver on glass cut across the room and everyone turned towards the origin of the sound. It was coming from Reg Barclay.

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls," he smiled. "Now that the last guest has arrived, let's all sing happy birthday to Silvia Rennay and Silvesta Kolopak as Roxa brings out their birthday cake."

Harry began an introduction to "Happy Birthday" on his saxophone, and then everyone began to sing. Silver doors at the rear of the hall opened, and Roxa came through them pushing a silver trolley which had the birthday cake on top. It was a large white cake, in the shape of a star, and was beautifully decorated with pink and blue icing.

As the crowd finished singing, Reg Barclay addressed the crowd again. "Where are the birthday babes?"

Gretchen and Edward stepped forward with Silvie and Stevie.

Reg scoured the crowd. "And where is the proud mother?"

"Right here," Kathryn said, raising her hand.

Reg put his hand to his brow, pretending not to find her. "Ah, I see you," he smiled, gesturing with his hand to her location, just to make sure everyone knew where she was. He then fell serious.

"While we are all here today to celebrate Silvia and Silvesta's first birthday, I'm sure that as we celebrate, we all think of the one who should be here celebrating with us."

Kathryn lowered her eyes. She knew it was inevitable that people were going to talk about Chakotay, especially at events like this, but she found it so difficult. Every time she thought about him so far away and so alone, the pain was overbearing.

"I mean, of course, their father, known to most of you as Commander Chakotay. If it wasn't for his noble sacrifice, then none of us would be here today." He held up the glass in his hands. "Let's make a toast. To Commander Chakotay."

Those in the crowd with glasses in their hands held them up. "Commander Chakotay."

"Now," Reg continued. "For the cutting of the cake..."

Gretchen and Edward made their way over to the cake, Silvie and Stevie in their arms. They both picked up a silver knife and, on the count of three, dug it deep into the cake.

The crowd cheered, and Harry once again played Happy Birthday on his saxophone.

As chatter once more filled the air, Kathryn quickly escaped to the kitchen, needing to be alone. She put down the gifts Seven's aunt had given her on a table, and then leant against it as she wept painfully. The tribute Reg had made to Chakotay had been wonderful, but oh had hurt so much...

The door behind her opened, and Kathryn hastily put her hand to her cheek, not wanting anyone to see her tears.

"Admiral?"

The voice was B'Elanna's.

Kathryn turned to her. "B'Elanna..." She paused. "I'm sorry, I just..."

"No," B'Elanna said, bridging the gap between them. "It hurt me too."

Kathryn looked up at the half-Klingon and saw tears in her eyes too.

"When I think of him all alone out there..."

"I know..." B'Elanna put her hand on Kathryn's shoulder. "I'm sorry for what I said just now. It was very inconsiderate."

"You just want him home," Kathryn said quietly. "And he will come home. I just know that he will."

B'Elanna nodded and then drew her former captain and friend close.


When all the guests had left the party, Roxa, Phoebe and Gretchen began to clear up, glad of the offered help from Ella and Celes. Edward sat in watch over Silvie and Stevie while Kathryn cleared up in the kitchen. Vixi and Heidi played outside and Kathryn watched them a moment from the kitchen window as she rinsed a cloth in the sink.

The door suddenly opened and Justin came in. Kathryn turned to him. "You'll have to bring Heidi to stay for a weekend. She and Vixi seem to have struck up a good friendship."

"That would be good," Justin said, walking over to her. He hesitated a moment and seemed uncomfortable. "Can we talk?"

"Sure," Kathryn said, putting down the cloth in her hand. "What is it?"

Justin was a moment in replying. "It's Ella," he said quietly. "I want to ask her to marry me."

"I see," Kathryn replied. Then she smiled warmly. "Then aren't you talking to the wrong person?"

Justin lowered his eyes. "I just don't know if I should... I mean should ask her..."

"Why not?"

"Because of all that she's been through. She's blossomed so much since we've been together. I don't want to ruin things by making her feel she's being pressurized. I only want to make things better... want to show her how committed I am. But I don't know how she feels about marriage. I don't know whether part of her comfortability around me is because she knows I respect her religious desire to wait until marriage for intimacy. If I ask her to marry me, then I might make her retreat into herself again, because it will be taking our relationship to a different dimension." He paused. "And maybe I shouldn't even be talking about this with you. I just don't know who else to talk too..."

Kathryn reached out and took his hand in hers. "We're friends, Justin. You can talk to me about anything."

Justin squeezed her hand. "Thank you."

As she let go of his hand, Kathryn spoke. "Would you like me to have a word with Ella, try to find out how she feels at the thought of marriage?"

Justin smiled. "I'd like that very much."

"Then I will as soon as the opportunity presents itself." She then looked at Justin sadly. "But are you sure you want to marry her? It's only a few months since you wanted me to leave Chakotay and marry you. It would be cruel too..." She paused, searched for the words... "propose marriage to her if you really want someone else."

Justin lowered his eyes and fidgeted with his fingers.

"A part of me will always love you, Kath," he said quietly. "But you were right when you said that what we had belonged to yesterday. Too many years have passed, and too much has changed, for us to ever rekindle what we had then. Your heart is Chakotay's now and I know that you will never give up waiting for him to come home, even if you have to wait for the rest of your life." He paused. "I love Ella, I really do. And I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I know she's younger than me and we come from different backgrounds, but those things don't seem to matter. She makes me happy and I think I make her happy too."

Kathryn smiled. "I think you do." She then laughed softly.

Justin questioned. "What is it?"

"I'm just thinking what you said to me about Chakotay, how different you thought we were, how it wouldn't work..."

Justin smiled too. "So I did." He then fell serious. "Experience can change us. Although, the differences between Ella and I are nothing compared to the differences between you and Chakotay..." He paused. "I just hope that I can be all that Ella needs. She's so fragile and I know only too well how much the wounds she bears need love to heal.

Kathryn took his hand again. "I'm sure you'll be everything she needs and more. You're a good man, Justin. She'll be as lucky to have you as you'll be to have her."


The sun was hot and dazzling. Arlei raised her hand to her brow to shield her sensitive violet eyes from the rays and approached Chakotay. He was busy carving a second eagle out of a unique golden wood he had discovered on this uninhabited planet. He and Arlei had decided to make camp on the planet as they waited for the wormhole to stabilize enough for them to travel through it. They had been on the planet now for over three weeks and while it was a true paradise, full of all kinds of wonders, they were both eager to continue their journey.

Chakotay saw her approach and held up the eagle. "Almost done..."

"They're wonderful, Chakotay," Arlei said, truly impressed by his craftsmanship. "Really wonderful."

"I know Silvie and Stevie are too young to appreciate them now, but one day they will." He paused. "It's their first birthday today. I can't help wonder what they're doing. I'm sure that Kathryn will have made a party for them." He lowered the eagle to the ground. "I just wish I could be there..."

"Well," Arlei smiled, "perhaps you can be sooner than you think. The wormhole's stabilized."

Chakotay looked up at her and smiled. "Then we'd better pack up and leave for it as soon as we can!"


The wormhole glowed in the distance, an array of blue and while light. Chakotay looked at it through the viewscreen and hoped it was still stable enough for them to enter it. He was detecting some unwanted fluctuations. He spoke to Arlei over the comm system. When she had first arrived, they had thought about traveling together in her shuttle, which was slightly more advanced than the Delta Flyer and had more living space, including two bunk bedrooms, but in the end they had decided it would be better to keep both ships in the event of coming into contact with a hostile species. Two ships would offer greater defence than one.

"I'm detecting fluctuations. Is it safe to go in?"

Arlei responded. "There is gathering disturbance but it shouldn't be severe enough yet to be a danger to us if we go in now. We might experience some turbulence, but nothing more."

Chakotay absorbed this. "Then let's do it. Let's go in." He worked his console. "See you in the Delta Quadrant."

Arlei's voice smiled. "See you there, partner."

Communication terminated and the flyer quickly soared to maximum warp and entered the wormhole. Lights flashed before him, and the flyer began to rock from side to side.

Then the turbulence stopped and Chakotay found himself in open space, nothing to see but stars and white specks of asteroids. He checked sensors and found that Arlei was close by.

Arlei's voice sounded. "Arlei to Chakotay. Everything went to plan my end. There's no damage to my vessel. What's your status?"

"The same," Chakotay replied. "It was a bumpy ride but no damage to the flyer."

"Shall we go on as planned to the second wormhole or do you want to wait a while? If you thought the last ride was bumpy, this one's going to be ten times worse."

"Let's go on," Chakotay answered. "The sooner we're out of here, the better. The presence of the Voril in this region makes me uncomfortable."


Silvie and Stevie lay fast asleep in their cot, the excitement of the day having exhausted them. Kathryn watched them sleep for a while, and then made her way downstairs. To her surprise, she found Ella sitting in the living room alone. The young woman got to her feet when she saw Kathryn enter.

"Ella," Kathryn said as the doors closed behind her, "I thought you'd left with Celes."

"I told her to go on without me. I was hoping I could talk to you about something."

"Of course," Kathryn said, gesturing to the couch. "Please, sit..."

Ella sat again and Kathryn sat in a comfortable armchair beside her.

"It's about Justin," she began hesitantly. "I think he's going to propose to me. He's been talking about marriage a lot lately and I just get that impression."

Kathryn smiled. "And how would you feel if he did...propose...?"

"I don't know," Ella replied. "I think happy, but scared too..."

"About what in particular?"

"About not being enough for him but at the same time being too much..."

"I felt the same way with Chakotay," Kathryn said gently. "But all my fears were needless. His love, and mine for him, dissolved them."

Tears welled in Ella's eyes. "But I'm not as strong as you. You're amazingly strong and courageous."

Kathryn got up now, went to sit beside her, and took Ella's hands in hers. "You're just as strong as me, Ella. And you're just as courageous. Look at what you've been through. It took immense courage to go back to Starfleet. Some people held captive with me never did..."

A tear ran down Ella's cheek. "I can only ever wish to be as strong as you. I'm not. I get so scared."

Kathryn squeezed her hands. "And you think I don't? There were times in the Delta Quadrant when I was really terrified. But bravery doesn't lie in having no fear, it lies in being afraid but doing something regardless. Without fear, there can be no courage. If we're not scared, we can't be brave."

"I never thought of it like that," Ella replied. She then looked up at her former captain. "Where there really times when you were scared?"

"Absolutely." She paused. "Everyone gets scared. And you have more reasons than most."

"Do you think I would be a good wife to him?"

"I know you would be," Kathryn smiled, "and a wonderful mother to little Heidi."

At the mention of the child's name, Ella smiled. "I have come to love her so much... both of them..."

"Then I think you have your answer," Kathryn said kindly.

Ella nodded and smiled. "I think I do." She then got to her feet. "I won't keep you. Thank you for listening."

Kathryn got to her feet. "There's no need to leave so soon. There's plenty of cake left over. How about we have a slice with a cup of tea?"

"I would love too," Ella replied, "but I promised Celes I wouldn't be long. We're going to an opera at nine."

"Lovely," Kathryn said kindly. She put her hand on Ella's shoulder. "Let's go to the transporter room."

She began to walk to the transporter room and Ella followed.


After Ella had left, Kathryn went back into the living room and opened a channel to Justin's home. Heidi answered the incoming hail, all dressed for bed in a pretty pink pyjamas. The doll Seven had given her was in her arms, and the little girl smiled when she recognised the face before her.

"Hello, Kathryn."

Kathryn smiled at her. "Hello, Miss Tighe."

"Are Silvie and Stevie in bed?"

"Fast asleep," Kathryn replied. "And looks like you're ready for bed yourself."

Heidi nodded.

"I like your pjyamas."

Heidi looked down at them proudly. "Grandma gave them to me."

Kathryn heard Justin's voice in the background. "Heidi, who are you..." Then she saw him on the viewscreen. "Kathryn."

Kathryn smiled. "I just wanted to let you know that if you put a certain question to a certain lady, the answer is most likely to be positive."

Justin's eyes lit up and then his whole face lit up with a smile. "Thank you, Kath. Thank you so much..."

"You're welcome. " She saw that Justin was holding a children's book in his hands. "Bedtime reading?"

Justin held up the book. "Dorothy and the Wizard of OZ." He then raised his daughter into his arms. "You're enjoying it, aren't you, honey?"

Heidi nodded. "Dorothy's been taken by wind to a land where there are witches and fairies and talking animals."

Kathryn smiled. "Then I'll let you both continue the adventure. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Kath," Justin replied. "And thank you again." He turned to Heidi. "Say goodnight to Kathryn."

"Goodnight, Kathryn."

"Goodnight, sweetheart."

Kathryn then terminated the connection and the screen faded.


The second wormhole was now in sight, a speck of blue in the distance, but growing larger by the second. Chakotay was just about to contact Arlei when she contacted him.

"The wormhole is fairly stable," she said, "but the turbulence will be worse than I thought. While my ship should get through it no problem, I don't recommend you fly faster than warp 3."

"Acknowledged," Chakotay replied.

"It's also possible that when we come out of it, the force will catapult us light years apart. To prevent that, I suggest we enter side by side and mutually tractor each other. That will give us greater stability and increase our likelihood of ending up in the same place."

"Good thinking. I'll align my ship with yours."

He worked the helm and in minutes the two ships were side by side. He then activated a tractor beam.

"Tractoring now," he said, and watched on screen as the tractor beam attached to Arlei's ship.

"Likewise," Arlei's voice said.

On the same screen, Chakotay saw Arlei's tractor beam attach to his ship.

"Looks like we're set," he said. "On the count of five we'll enter at warp 3." He then began to count. "One, two, three, four...five..."

On five, both ships slowly moved towards the wormhole, then gathered speed and disappeared inside.


The ride was rough and Chakotay was violently jostled in his seat. But the tractor beams did their job and held the two ships together as they ploughed through the pulsating wormhole. Chakotay was glad when the blue swirls on the screen before him changed into white streaming stars and the nauseous rocking ended. Wiping his brow, he established a link with Arlei and began to disengage the tractor.

"Disengaging tractor," he said, "slowing to impulse."

"Doing the same," Arlei replied.

"Looks like we've made it somewhere," he said, working his console. "Let's see where exactly..."

He did a quick analysis of their location and his stomach sank when he saw where they were.

"I don't believe it," he said anxiously.

Arlei questioned. "What's wrong?"

"We're in the heart of Cardassian space."

"Those you were fighting against in the Maquis?"

"That's them," Chakotay answered. "There's several Cardassian vessels in the vicinity. If we can detect them, then they've probably detected us." He got to his feet. "We'll have to abandon the flyer. Only your vessel has a cloak and we're going to need one."

A beep suddenly sounded. "Incoming transmission."

It had to be from the Cardassians. "They've found us," he said. "Transport me to your ship and then bring the cloak online..."

A violent jolt suddenly shook the flyer.

"I'm under attack," Arlei said, "trying to..."

Chakotay then felt the familiar tingle of transportation and dematerialized. When he rematerialized, he expected to find himself in Arlei's shuttle, but to his horror he found himself face to face with two aggressive looking male Cardassians. One of them spoke, his voice as harsh as his countenance.

"What is your purpose in our space?"

Chakotay answered as calmly as he could. "Just passing through on my way to the Federation."

Another Cardassian male stepped out from the shadows and glared at Chakotay, phaser at the ready. "Not so tough now are you, Maquis Warrior?"

"Marolak," Chakotay said bitterly.

The man stepped closer and put his phaser to Chakotay's chest. "For months you and your vagabonds terrorized me without mercy, destroying my ships and killing my men. But looks like the time has come for me to make you pay." He punched Chakotay hard in the stomach, making him keel over in agony. "And make you pay I will, Maquis."

He was about to kick Chakotay when one of the other men seized him. "No. We don't want to antagonize the Federation by harming him."

Moralak freed himself from the man's grasp. "You think anyone will care about him? He's nothing but vermin Maquis..."

"There was another ship. He wasn't alone..."

"I don't give a damn whether there was a whole fleet, Karlik! He's going to get what's coming to him..."

The other man spoke now. "But at the expense of yourself? You'll be killed if you act unofficially and antagonize the Federation. Haven't you suffered enough? Haven't we all?"

"I'm not letting him get away with what he did, Lorik!"

Chakotay tried to get to his feet, but Moralak viciously knocked him down. "I'm going to revenged on you, Maquis, I swear it..."

"This isn't the way," Lorik continued, "send him to Vorlita. That way you'll be above reproach..."

"No," Moralak cried. "No I..." He then stopped and laughed coldly. "Yes. Yes, that's it. We'll send him to Vorlita."

Karlik spoke. "But Vorlita's a prison. What grounds do we have?"

"Acts of violence against Cardassians," Moralak replied. "No one will question that. He has a history." He kicked Chakotay violently in the shin. "And the Federation will no more want to antagonize the situation than our superiors. They won't make a war over the death of a Maquis traitor." He turned to Lorik. "Open a channel to Vorlita. Tell them we have a prisoner they are to take especial delight in torturing." He picked Chakotay up with his strong arms and got him against the wall. "By the time they've finished with you, you're going to wish you were never born." He seized Chakotay's head and slammed it hard against the wall. A blackness fell before Chakotay's eyes, and he drifted into unconsciousness...

END OF PART ONE