Disclaimer: I do not own any DBZ characters.
REVIEWERS PLEASE READ: I think I'm going to move this story down to a PG-13 instead of R because it doesn't seem that it's that bad of a story besides cussing. I don't know review and tell me what you think...
QueenPan1295- no that's ok I'm fine...thanks for reviewing!
Jack off Jill's American Made- glad to have a new reviewer! Thanks for reviewing!
CowgirlUSA- Your welcome...SCHOOL DOES SUCK! Anyways, thank you for reviewing!
Slave-of-trunks- thanks for reviewing and you did a great job on chapter eight of your story... nice cliffhanger at the end I'm dieing to see what's next.
Chapter Eleven: Secrets of The Adolescent Road
Dear Diary,
Life? What is life? We sure as hell don't know. It's almost funny how our perfect childhood led us to this hell of being a teenager. It's almost funny. Why do we even write in you? You can't respond and you defiantly aren't our friend. Our so-called friends, also known as our shrinks, said it would help us through our confusing journey to find ourselves and found the paths that we lost so many years ago. We swear they get that shit from a fucken Dr. Phil or Opera special on T.V. Of course they supposedly love us. But when they say the word path that's when we start to think. That's when we start to reflect back on the good. Looking into the past we see pink clear skies all around us and the world was ours for the taking.
We walked along a golden path with the vibrant tulips and poppy flowers growing on the sides that warned us never to stay off the path. We were young and naive then and we had no worries or real problems. So we stayed on the golden path and ignored the dark forest that surrounded us. Then one day we stumbled off the path together and fell into the dark forest. We saw the gray paths that led others to shame and unhappiness. Everyone was hunched over and walking on the gray paths. When we turned around the golden path had disappeared and we were alone.
Our footsteps were muted as we walked through the muddy darkness of this black forest. Shadows loomed over us and had no desire to pacify us in our fear. We were truly alone and trying to find a hand that wasn't cold to the touch but none were warm or even average. It was cold, dark, and terrifying to us. The mud stopped squishing beneath our feet and we started walking on something hard. Looking down we then gasped and realized that we were on a gray path that was our own and there was no looking back to our golden days. Now they were gray and dark with no sense of escape in sight. We still walk on this path never knowing the outcome but never fearful anymore. We show no emotion to this new path. This is life and we found our epiphany of what it is. This seems to be the end but really...
It's the beginning of all beginnings...
Yours truly,
The loved but loveless
"Every memory, every thought, and every whisper of emotion we possibly had in the past are in this book." Pan said.
"Should we go back in it?" Bra suggested.
"No I'm not ready."
"Come on Pan what could it hurt."
"Well there is one entry I want to look at..."
"Which is...?"
"His entry."
Bra's eyes went wide and she shook her head.
"Pan no. That wasn't even us."
"Bra think about it. That was when he took over us. Maybe we could see what goes on in his mind."
Bra rolled her eyes imperiously at Pan. She 'obviously' had all the answers. Pan was going to enjoy proving her wrong.
"Pan get real. He only wrote that to mock us by using a diary. If I remember correctly he said that we should change our title to a whore's diary instead of diary."
"What? He took control of you guys?" asked Goten. Pan and Bra had completely forgotten about the guys in the huge bathroom. At first they sent a glare to him like he was ease-dropping but then they realized their mistake and their features softened to a look of apology.
"Well there are a couple types of control. He had control over us for nine years."
"Then there's the other type were he fully takes control of you. Where your body becomes his and your mind is his and if he loses control of your body you wake up and you know what happened."
"Well I know about the first one but what about the second one?"
"The second one has happened only twice. The first time it happened it was two weeks after you guys died. Let's just say he took us out for a joy ride."
"Yeah we know. Our T.V. wasn't broken for the first couple weeks so we saw what happened," said Spiziker.
"Then there was this other time which is what truly made us leave Vegeta."
"What happened?" asked Alabaster.
"You don't want to know." Pan said as she left the room with Bra. Everyone followed after them but the girls had other plans for them.
"Please Bra and I need to be alone." Pan pleaded.
"Don't worry we'll be fine it's just a lot for us to take in right now. We haven't been home in two years." Bra assured.
Trunks and Goten were about to protest but Pan cut them off.
"Look why don't you guys show Matt, Eric and T.J. to their rooms in the guest wing."
"The others can show them. We'd rather stay with you." Trunks said firmly.
"Trunks, Goten please we're begging you. Just let us be. It won't hurt."
"Okay," Goten sighed out, "Just be back at bed time."
"Goten I'm not your little sister anymore. I'm twenty- one I don't have a bed time."
"Yeah well think back. It should be around nine."
"Okay we promise."
With that they parted ways. Pan and Bra lay down on their old bed and sighed. The smell of old pot smoke and peaches was apparent on the comforter. It was weird combination but this was home. Home was supposed to be weird. It was at least to their old servants. No it wasn't home that was weird it was always them. They were the misfit princesses. They hated pink and despised light makeup. That was just...weird according to the people.
Flipping through the dusty ink absorbed pages we received a sense of nostalgia. We wanted to get back to earth. We had to. This way our family could be safe. What happened last time could not repeat itself.
/Flashback two years ago-
You love it don't you. The smell of blood is all around you Bra. You crave for it just like you Father.
No I don't Freeza just shut up!
Pan it's in your blood. Don't you crave their deaths?
Never!
You feel nothing you whores! You never have! What's two more deaths to you?
Shut the fuck up!
Oh so you finally have the courage to cuss. You can't do anything! Your fathers would be ashamed! Look at you both! Power levels of five. Pathetic!
Black twists of evil weaved through the twists of tissues through their minds. Pan and Bra didn't have enough time to put up a fight. Their hands grasped for the golden door knob to find escape. Freeza could detect no emotion of kill so he let loose an evil mist and fires burned away what little control they had left. From the ashes the new phoenix arose and its name was death.
The famous death smirk that Vegeta used when he used to kill for pleasure was now displayed upon the faces of Pan and Bra. Both of them let go of the door knob and took long slow strides across the room to the dresser. Pan and Bra slowly opened the dresser drawer as if they wanted to remember this beautifully planned moment forever.
After a few small creaks the drawer opened to reveal two mea t cleavers that Rosa, one of the servants, had used to beat one of the rugs out last week. Soft skin touched the cold metal of the cleavers. They picked them up and stalked down the hallway. But before leaving the room both of them wrote into their diary.
They left hallway sixty-nine and descended down the stairs to hallway fifty-nine, forty-nine, then finally...thirty-nine.
Dark echoing footsteps could be heard from their feet down the hallway. Then the hallway separated into two separate ones. At the fork Pan and Bra separated. Pan opened the door to her room and looked at the sleeping body in the large King sized bed that once was also occupied by her father. Walking over to the bed Pan froze at the body and gave a Freeza like smirk. She then raised the clever up into the air and then brought it down to the body's head. Two- inches before she reached the head Pan froze. On the nightstand was a picture of Pan when she was twelve.
The evil in her mind screamed with the growing good in her mind and Freeza's evil left. Pan woke up and stared at her mother.
'Jesus I'm a monster. I don't deserve her love.'
Pan pet the head of her mother and whispered with what little love she actually had left in her body, "I love you mommy." It came out cold but the words were somewhat true. Pan turned to leave the room running. She had to find Bra.
Pan ran into Bra back at the fork. Apparently when the evil left Pan's brain it left Bra's as well. Tonight they must leave and never come back. They had to, for the safety of their family. So right before dawn they made their escape from the castle, promising themselves that they would never return. If only promises were never broken...
/End Flashback
They almost died. That night they almost truly became cold blooded murderers. It was father like daughter for Bra. For Pan it was grandfather like granddaughter. Pan and Bra quickly erased that night from their thoughts and they moved on to the diary. Opening it up to page three- hundred and seventeen their eyes studied the page. This was the second to last entry that wasn't even theirs. The last one was describing how they never would come back.
Dear whores' diary,
This whole road to discovery seems to be full of bullshit for the little monkey children. They have no life all they are is my precious little servant that from time to time I rape. It amazes me how strong these monkey whores are. I would have expected them to die after a year. Of course the blue-haired odd one is just like her father and mother...stubborn as hell. The one with black hair had been around her grandfather and brother too long. I have a way to break these whores but I'm having too much fun as it is. The orb shall be ready when I command it to be then they will die. These monkey hands are really starting to cramp because of writing in this worthless piece of shit. Humph... These whores' dairy is just like them: shitty and worthless. This book is not worthy of my time.
Lord of Fear,
Freeza
Dear Diary,
We of course read this entry before we left. You may think that we don't know what the orb is, but we do. We just don't feel like talking about it right now. We have to leave it's too horrible to stay here anymore. Good bye dear diary and may you be cleansed of your evil sometime in the future.
Yours truly,
Pan and Bra
That was our last entry. Other entries were more dark or unexpected. We had no emotion what so ever in our adolescent years.
Dear Diary,
Smoked Pot. Slept with our boyfriends. Dumped them. End of story. Goodnight.
Yours truly,
The Monotone Girls
Ones like that were often short and others were long but with a lot of sentence fragments. Some were poems and others were gateways into our minds and we didn't even know it. Our poems showed the keys into our minds. To us they were things that would be written when we were bored.
Dear Diary,
Why?
Why do we sleep for a new day?
Why do we live just to decay?
Why do we live in a life that others hate?
Why do we crave our nightly rituals of rape?
Is it the pain we enjoy?
Or is it our nightly toy?
To be, to wish, to want,
To drown in the darkness we never feel,
To live in a world that banished a love,
And to live in the monotone emotions we grasp in our hands bloody with guilt,
Why are we dieing to live if we're just living to die?
Why are we trying to see what's not inside?
Why are we here?
We're living a lie,
Why don't we die?
Why?
Yours truly,
Drowning in 'Whys'
Disappointments are what we were. Everyone looked to us as princesses without discipline and enough attention. Our own people thought that. We're not mad at them we understood why they thought that. Parents wanted good role models for their daughters. We wore all black instead of the standard princess pink and we wore baggy clothes instead of the loose but tight clothing that showed pretty princesses' body off.
Our mothers never thought of us as disappointments. They tried to discipline but they couldn't. It was virtually impossible. We remembered when we came home or when they came home they would yell at us. Almost like a slapping in the face, trying to get their daughters back. It never worked.
/Flashback
I'll be coming home just to be alone
Cause I know that your not there and I know that you don't care,
I can hardly wait to leave this place
No matter how hard I try you're never satisfied
This is not a home I think I'm better off alone
Wall ways disappear even when you're here
This is not a home I think I'm better off alone
Home, home
This house is not a
Home
By the time you come home I'm already stoned
You turn off the TV and you scream at me
I can hardly wait till you get off my case
No matter how hard I try you're never satisfied
This is not a home I think I'm better off alone
Wall ways disappear even when you're here
This is not a home I think I'm better off alone
Home, home
This house is not a...
Home, home
This house is not a ...
Home, home
This house is not a home
I'm better off alone
No matter how hard I try you're never satisfied
This is not a home I think I'm better off alone
Home, Home
This house is not a...
Home, Home
This house is not home...
The three day's grace song ended on the cd and between songs distinct crying through the double doors could be hear. Sobs of long years of pain and loss were never pleasant ones. Two firm bumps on the other side could be heard. They had fallen on their knees now. But what would it matter to the people in the room. It didn't matter to them that the sobs were painful as far as they were concerned they were cold- heartless bitches who didn't care for others. Yet they did.
Tonight was a new moon. It was their favorite phase of the moon. Reflections of true emotions were always shown on these nights, the reflection of nothing. Tonight nothing but darkness would penetrate planet Vegeta the same could be said for lost souls.
Dear Diary,
We made them cry again. They caught us smoking pot and they screamed at us. It wasn't like they didn't know why we did it. Don't they know that the weak pathetic smiles on our face are fake? The little ones we give the media are accompanied by petroleum jelly. Now hearing them outside the doors makes us think back to when our fathers died and how broken they were. I guess we're just like our fathers now. We leave people broken on the ground in grief together. So we made someone cry and we don't care. What else is new?
Yours Truly,
Like Fathers, like Daughters
Somewhere else in the palace-
They saw it, all of it. Did they honestly think they forgot about their bond? The two dark figures ran through the halls of the castle keeping their minds closed to Pan and Bra. Their fast footsteps were not unheard by the servants. As they passed by servants gave them odd looks but they didn't care. They were so stupid for going so far away from hallway sixty-nine. They should have stayed with them.
Pan and Bra-
Dear Diary,
Adolescence is coming to an end and the others are leaving. They're leaving the gray path we came to so long ago. They thirst for more and yet we don't. Looking down on the path we see water. It begged for us in ways unimaginable. It whispered the galaxies most desirable thing in their ears but they felt none of it. Melted clocks on the branches of black trees kept on ticking. Tick... 'Your life' Tock... 'Circles'...Tick... 'The light' they whispered to us. It was time to leave. Where would we go? I guess we don't care. This area of gray blankness didn't want us anymore just like everywhere else.
In the circles of time,
Here we are stuck,
On this gray path wit out luck,
We're in the pieces that others broke
Our reflections, a broken mirror,
Living a lie stuck in other's hearts
We're standing in a mess of dark
Without the guidance of a brother
Nothing
Without a care in the world
Nothing
Without a father's comfort
Nothing
Without an uncle's tease
Nothing
Without a cousin's pleads
Nothing
Without a grandfather's advice
Nothing
Being void of emotion
Nothing
Being left alone
Nothing
Ripples of the water no longer calling our names
Nothing
Here's our epiphany,
If you read between our lines
And uncoil the truth,
We are nothing...
Yours Truly,
Nothing
"Pan!" Trunks yelled out as he burst into the room. Goten came in a second later.
"You guys what are you doing it's only six o'clock?"
Trunks didn't say anything he picked up Pan and put her over his shoulder and walked out of the room. Goten did the same but before leaving the room her closed the diary and the door.
"Trunks let me go right now!" Pan screamed in his ear as loud as she could. Trunks didn't say anything back to her as he carried her to his room. Once in his room he put her on her feet and slammed the door.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"I could ask the same question to you! Why didn't you tell me you almost killed your mom? Why are your thoughts so dark? I thought you were happy with me! Why don't you let go of the past Panny? Why can't you be happy with me and move forward with your life! Why?!"
"Dammit Trunks what the hell is wrong with you?! I can't believe you at this moment in time! I'm trying to concur my past so I can move on and be with you! You're too blind in your own damn emotions to listen to mine!"
"Well I'm sorry but you haven't been listening to mine either Pan! Do you know how many years I've contacted you through dreams? Do you? For nine years I did! Nine whole fucken years! Everyday! Do you know how hard it was for me being away from you? To always be near you but not close enough? Nine years of wondering what the hell you were doing without me? Do you want to know the truth Pan? I'm fucken scared shitless! That's right shitless! I'm scared of losing you!"
At this point Pan started to cry. She wanted her memories of those dreams back. Freeza took them from her. He had almost won and Trunks had almost lost.
"Pan I'm sorry..."
"I want to remember Trunks. I want to remember everything."
"Then let me show you Panny."
"How?"
"Like this..."
K I'M GOING TO END IT HERE. It's IMPORTANT that you answer this question. Do you want a lemon or not... I mean I might change this story down to a pg-13. I've done stuff but I'm still a virgin so...idk what do you think?
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