FlipWise: thanks for reviewing :)
glad you like it so far :)
oh, really? I didn't know that :(
I just have chosen the name 'cause I like it
well, no, I haven't seen this movie
it isn't a horror movie, is it?
krista: thank you for your review :)
well, here we go... ;)
11. A decision is fixed
While Betty and Caroline led Ponyboy to the door Mike pushed Selena back into her room and locked her in it.
After that he walked away very furious. He decided to take Selena to task afterwards and to punish her for her behaviour.
But he shouldn't come to it any more...
When Mike locked Selena in her room she started crying.
"Oh, Pony, forgive me... I only caused ya trouble. I ain't a good company for ya. Ya deserved someone better than me, a whore..."
She took a sheet of paper and began to write something.
Her last words, a farewell letter; dedicate to the man - the first love of her life - who disappointed and mortified her so much and didn't return her love.
While she wrote her memories came back.
She went through her past a secondtime: she saw how she met Mike and fell in love with him; how he changed, started to beat her and didn't return her love; how he turned her into his whore; how she did more and more the job that she hated and loathed so much, and really became lonely this way.
And she probably would have spend her whole life that lonely and cheerless until she met Ponyboy, who finally gave her life a meaning again.
Her high spirits returned with him, she took him into her heart right away and treated him as if he would be her own son, and just as much she loved him.
She thought about how Mike tried to end this affectionate relation by all means and finally succeed in it!
Selena knew that the friendship to Pony was condemned to go wrong from the beginning.
Because she placed her tarot-cards on that day Pony came to her the first time, and she always believed in them so far.
One of the cards came true just in this moment: the lovers!
So there was no reason for her, not to believe in the truth of these cards any more. It even confirmed her in it. Selena finally found with Pony someone, who really understands her.
But after Ponyboy was gone on that day, she finished placing the cards.
And right after 'the lovers' came 'the death'.
She was so shocked about it that she swore herself to place never ever again the cards after that.
And from there on she also knew that there was no use to keep on meeting with Pony.
This relation wouldn't have a happy end!
But she couldn't do anything against her feelings for him and so she allowed that he still visited her.
A mistake, as she found out now.
She really shouldn't have involved him in that.
He just didn't deserve such a thing.
She wouldn't cause him even more trouble.
He had enough to fight with his life as a Greaser, who just lost his parents short time ago, and he was constantly subjected to the scorn of his environment - above all of the scorn of the Socs.
There he definitely didn't need the company of a whore into the bargain.
And all that only intensified her intention to kill herself.
So she kept on writing her letter...
