Disclaimer: I do not own LOST
Author's Note: Again, uneventful chapter. But I love to develop the relationships on the island.
Warning: Slight sexual references and innuendos…
I dedicate this chapter to all my friends who I am going to miss like hell now that school is over and to the ladies of LOST who rock every Wednesday night.
Thanks for the reviews! I'm glad people are still reading after all this time…
Chapter 16: Mothers, Lovers, Sisters, Friends
Eve is perhaps the most intriguing character in history and lore. Her consumption of a simple fruit is pinpointed as the reason for all the evil in the world, the Fall of Man. She was tempted by pride and greed and fooled by a serpent with empty promises. She gave the fruit to Adam and all you-know-what broke lose.
If the stories hold true then Eve is in fact the most important person in human history. Again, the most intriguing. And it is a trait that she handed down to the future members of her sex. Women are intriguing…
And willful and stubborn and vivacious. Women are beautiful. They live on their emotions and then try to deny it. Women watch each other with keen, unescaping eyes.
When a woman dresses up nine times out of ten she really dresses up for other women. She seeks the approval of her own sex. She watched warily to make sure other women do not step too far into her life. They can be catty and cruel to each other. When women fight… well, there's nothing nastier…
Which might explain why Shannon and Kate were standing on the beach in the middle of the night screaming irrationally at each other.
"Is he tucked away all safe and sound?"
Kate heard the unreasonable anger in Shannon's voice and rolled her eyes. "Yes." This wasn't a conversation she wanted to have at that moment.
"Well good for you. I guess you can sleep soundly tonight."
"Shannon, I still have a son out there too. I'm not going to be sleeping soundly."
"Well, at least you have one kid. My only daughter is still missing."
"So I'm not allowed to be upset? I've got one kid back so the other doesn't matter? I'm still worried sick!"
Shannon bit her tongue and narrowed her eyes, "You have no idea what I'm feeling right now. My life is out there is the jungle."
"Your life? What about my life? At least you have someone to share this with. You have Sayid. I don't have anyone."
"Oh please, don't play the pity card with me. I'm not going to fall all over myself trying to make you happy like everyone else on this island does."
Kate could feel her face redden, "Why the hell are you taking this out on me? It's not my fault that the kids are missing."
"I just think it's a little strange that only two came back and conveniently can't remember what happened."
"You're blaming Hunter for this!"
"What it I am! He's always been a trouble maker!"
Both women's voices had escalated and neither noticed the stares their direction from people around the camp. Sun came running up the beach and jumped between them.
"This is not the time to be yelling at each other like this," she said quietly.
Shannon folded her arms over her chest in defiance. "She started it."
Kate rolled her eyes, "Oh my God. How old are you?"
Sun let out a breath, "Listen, you're both in pain. Please do not direct your anger at each other."
Shannon and Kate continued to glare at each other and Sun let out a sigh of frustration. She grabbed each of their arms and led them away from the crowd. The three women walked in silence around the cove. In the darkness they found their way to some large rocks set near the trees.
"What are we doing here?"
Sun sat down and directed the other women to do the same. They each sighed and took a seat away from each other.
"I haven't seen you two fight like this in a long time."
"Yeah well, extreme times make you realize why you don't like certain people."
Kate snorted, "I thought extreme times were supposed to bring people together."
Shannon shrugged, "Whatever."
Sun smiled slowly, "Don't you remember the truce that you made? About eighteen years ago? You agreed to be friends. You agreed to help each other out. We stick together. As women."
Kate shook her head, "You know, it's a good thing that we have you around Sun. Always trying to make peace."
"I don't like to see you fight. You are my friends."
She didn't say a word but suddenly Shannon dropped her head to her hands. Through the darkness Sun and Kate could make out her shaking shoulders and the distinct sound of crying.
Breaking down her resolve, Kate's shoulder's sagged and she inched closer to Shannon. Her breath caught as she reached her arm around Shannon's shoulders. When the younger woman laid her head on her shoulder Kate couldn't help the tears the began to fall down her own cheeks.
Sun watched in silence as the two women held each other in the darkness.
"My back hurts."
"Yes, you told me that."
"My feet hurt."
"It would be good if you went to lie down."
"I'm bored."
Sayid looked up from his work with a hint of frustration crossing his features, "What do you want me to do?"
Shannon stuck out her lower lip, "Fix it."
Sayid laughed and stood up to kiss her on the forehead, "Unfortunately there is no cure." He looked down at her stomach and touched her tenderly. A smile touched his lips, "She's kicking."
"Yeah, that's annoying too." Shannon narrowed her eyes, "And what makes you think it's a girl?"
"She's already got her mother's attitude."
"Cute."
Sayid kissed her again and sat back down.
Shannon watched him for a moment and realized that he wasn't going to do any more for her. She sighed and turned to walk down the beach. Her feet ached so took off her shoes and walked at the edge of the water. She could hear people laughing and talking around the camp and she suddenly felt a surge of loneliness. Sayid didn't mean to ignore her. She knew they couldn't spend everyone moment together. But in the two years that they had been on the island she had yet to make another friend.
Her walk led her around the cove out of sight of everyone else. At first she didn't notice the other figure that had sought refuge back there. Kate sat with her back against one of the rocks, her legs stretched out in front of her.
Shannon startled and then turned to leave, "Sorry, I didn't think anyone would be over here."
Kate shrugged and waved her back over, "It's okay. Stay. I wouldn't mind the company."
Shannon looked down the beach and considered leaving but she recognized the need in Kate's voice. She nodded and joined her in the sand, sitting against the rock in the same fashion.
They sat there in silence for while each thinking about the irony of the two of them sitting there in understanding with each other. From day one the two women had clashed in everything they did. Neither of them hid the fact that they didn't like each other. And it didn't help matters that Sayid and Sawyer could barely stand to be within two feet of each other. Over the past two years they had basically stayed clear of each other.
But now as they sat there against that rock something changed.
After while Kate looked over at Shannon.
"Your feet hurt?"
Shannon nodded and tilted her head toward Kate, "Your back hurt?"
"Yup." Kate ran her hand over her stomach, "And God could I kill for a pint of rocky road."
Shannon laughed, "No, all I want is something with cinnamon on it. A cinnamon bun, or a graham cracker."
"Anything but mango and fish."
Shannon made a face, "I could strangle myself for not taking advantage of food when I had the chance."
Kate laughed.
Over the next few weeks Shannon and Kate found themselves meeting often in the same spot. Sometimes they would sit and talk about the foods that they missed, how much their feet hurt or the different irritating quirks of the island. Other times they would sit there in silence just staring out at the water in thought.
They never talked about anything of particular importance and they seemed to understand when the other needed the silence.
One day while they sat there Claire and Sun happened to stumble upon them while out on a walk with Adam.
"Is this an exclusive club?"
Kate smiled, "Not really. We just needed to get away."
Sun smiled, "It is nice to get away from all the men."
"We do seem to be slightly out numbered here don't we?"
Shannon shrugged, "I don't see why you're complaining. Surrounded by attractive men on a tropical island. Most women wouldn't be complaining."
Claire pointed at both Kate and Shannon's stomachs, "Yeah, but look where is gets you."
"That is true."
Claire and Sun sat down in the sand and Claire set Adam on his shaky feet. The four women watched him walk unsteadily through the sand. Kate shook her head and looked at Claire with admiration.
"I don't know how you do it."
Claire shrugged, "I didn't think I would be able to do it either. But somehow you do it. You just have to."
"I never saw myself as a mother."
Everyone looked over at Shannon as she spoke.
"I never liked kids. I never liked being one myself. I never liked my mother much. So I never really saw myself in this position." She looked down and smiled a little bit sadly, "So, I don't really know if I'm going to be good at it."
Kate looked over at her, "None of us saw ourselves in this position. I never saw myself as a mother. I never liked my mother much. But I also never saw myself on this island. I never saw the past two years… I guess there are some things in life that you just don't expect. But that doesn't make them bad."
"It is a gift."
Claire, Shannon and Kate all turned their heads to look at Sun. She did not return their looks and kept her gaze steady on Adam.
"A baby is a gift. Jin and I…we wanted a child. We wanted…but I couldn't… we couldn't…" Sun finally turned to look at the three other women. "A baby is a gift. Unexpected or not."
Shannon ran her hand over her stomach. She could feel the baby kicking. Her daughter. Her gift.
"I miss Claire."
Kate smiled sadly and nodded in agreement with Shannon. "No one could ever make me laugh like her."
" She would know what to do right now. She would know how to feel. She would pull something out of astrology and somehow it would all make sense."
Sun shook her head, "She would be hurting too right now."
"I know that. But just to have her here would make everything a little less horrible."
Kate looked down at her feet. "Every time we lose someone, the whole island just goes upside down. Nothing seems right anymore."
Sun reached out and held her hand, forced her to look into her eyes, "Which is why it is important that we go through this together. That we stick together. No matter what."
Shannon laughed suddenly, "I had friends. Back in L.A. We would go clubbing together, pick up guys, shopping… I called them my friends. But in a split second I would have turned on them… for a guy, for a piece of gossip. I never actually had friends. I can't image going through the events of this island with them. They wouldn't have supported me." She shrugged, "I wouldn't have supported them."
"I never really had girlfriends," Kate grinned, "No time for that when you're fugitive."
Shannon and Sun smiled. Kate had told them many years ago about her past and the reason that she was on the island. The conversation that had started out between Kate and Shannon as meaningless pregnancy talk had evolved over the years. As Sun had explained the pain of not being able to have a child, Kate had slowly divulged the details of her childhood and life as an outlaw. Claire, Sun and Shannon had listened quietly as she told them about her abusive father and the death of her parents, the way she had gotten sucked into a way of life that had seemed so easy at first.
The women listened and then leaned on each other. Shannon began to explain the details of her relationship with Boone and the way that she had treated him. Claire explained how she had run away from her parents when they disapproved of her boyfriend. In turn to have him leave her when she was five months pregnant.
And slowly the women realized that each had their own problems. None was particularly bigger than the other. And they bonded over the knowledge that others suffered. That they could suffer and heal together.
Not that their conversations were entirely serious.
"Exactly how good is Sawyer in bed, Kate?
Kate tore her eyes away from James to gape at Shannon, "Excuse me?"
Shannon shrugged and threw her hands up in defense, "What? It's just that when I first saw Sawyer I thought that he was probably pretty damn good in bed."
Kate continued to stare at her in shock until Claire piped up, "I don't know. I kinda thought Sayid would be the best."
Now it was Shannon's turn to gape, "You thought what?"
Claire grinned cheekily, "Oh come on, you know. Rough hands and all."
Kate laughed and looked over at Sun who was blushing and looking away. Kate bit her lip and cocked her head, "When then Charlie must be a disappointment."
"Ohhhh!" Shannon snorted and Claire narrowed her eyes, "What's that's supposed to mean?"
"Nothing. It's just that up against Sawyer or Sayid, Charlie's a little…"
"A little what!"
Kate shrugged, "A little puny." She grinned.
Claire glared at her and them smiled smugly, "Well then, I guess it good that it's quality and not quantity that matters."
Kate and Shannon laughed and Sun stood up with a bright red face. Claire looked up at her with a sigh.
"Oh come on Sun… don't you have anything to say about Jin?"
It was a well known fact that the two had been attempting to rekindle their broken relationship.
Suddenly Sun got a sly smile on her face. She smirked slightly at the other women, "With Jin, its quality and quantity." She smiled again and walked away leaving Claire, Shannon and Kate in silent shock.
One year later
"Okay, so we've been here for what, four years now? No rescue, no sign to point to the fact that we're still on planet earth in the same dimension. So what do we do?"
Shannon turned around in the sand to glance back at Claire, "What do you mean?"
Claire shrugged, "I mean that we've started our own civilization." She waved in the direction of the camp where more permanent huts had sprung over the years, "We have a migration pattern for god sake."
She was referring to the fact that during most of the year everyone lived on or close to the beach. During monsoon season everyone migrated toward the caves where it was warmer and dryer.
"We have families and tradition. Nadia, James and Adam, they're growing up in a completely different culture that we used to know. Even if we did get rescued, sometimes I wonder if it would be good for them."
Kate squinted into the sun, "What are you getting at?"
"I don't know. I just… I just feel like I want Adam to feel something of what we used to know." Claire picked at the sand at her feet.
"And what exactly is it that you want Adam to know?"
Claire smiled and looked a little foolish, "Marriage. I want Adam to understand it. I want him to know what it means to be a family. And I know it's stupid because Charlie and I are happier unmarried than my parents ever were married. But I still can't help but wish that there was some way…"
Sun smiled, "There is a way. You said it yourself. It is a completely different culture. We can make it our own. We can make a marriage on this island real."
Shannon sat up suddenly, her interest in a good party suddenly peaked, "Yeah, you could have Jack do the ceremony, because lets face it, it makes the most sense for him to do it. You could make a ring with shells or something…"
Claire laughed, "I guess the only thing that's missing it the groom to ask me."
Kate's eyebrows went up, "Hey, maybe in this culture, the woman asks the man."
"Maybe that's true… So you gonna ask Sawyer?"
"Yeah, right."
Shannon shook her head, "I don't know Kate, I think you should ask him."
"Okay, fine." Kate smiled smugly, "But only if you ask Sayid."
"I'm not going to ask Sayid to marry me."
"Why not?"
Shannon glared at the other women, "It would be going against his culture. I don't think women ask men to marry them in Iraq."
"Like we said, we're not in Iraq. We're on the island."
Shannon didn't say anything as she mulled the idea around in her head of asking Sayid to marry her. Claire and Kate turned to Sun who shook her head, "No, no. I am already married."
"Oh, come on. You guys can renew your vows."
"I don't think we've come to that, we're still trying to work things out."
Shannon rolled her eyes, "Good lord, you've been 'working things out' for the past three years. You do things a little slower in Korea don't you?"
Sun was silent but a hint of a smile crossed her face at the thought of remarrying her husband. She and Jin had come a long way since the crash. Maybe, just maybe…
"Maybe we're just being silly. I mean there are more important things to be worrying about on this island. Maybe it shouldn't matter so much." Kate shrugged and looked around at the other women.
But Claire shook her head, "No, I think you were right the first time. If we're stuck on this island we should make the best of it. We can't just sit around and wait for something that may never come. Besides, I love Charlie. If we were off this island we would probably already be married."
Shannon looked down sadly, "Yeah, but if we were never on this island, you wouldn't even know Charlie. I wouldn't know Sayid. Because lets face it, a spoiled snob from L.A. and a former Iraqi soldier? They probably wouldn't meet under normal circumstances."
"But you did meet." Sun chose her words carefully, "Destiny or fate brought us here to this island. It brought you together. It brought us all together. It is not silly to think about marriage."
The other women smiled and together they began making plans for the best wedding possible on a deserted island. And as the weeks went on the four women all found ways to ask their respective partners to marry them. Claire was the boldest, dropping to her knees in front of Charlie after dinner one night. Charlie had appeared slightly embarrassed at first but had eventually beamed brightly and said yes.
Kate wasn't sure how to ask Sawyer. She knew he loved her but the word 'marriage' changed the whole dynamic of their relationship. One night after they had put James to bed and were lying in their shelter together Kate had turned to him.
"So, Charlie and Claire are getting married."
"That's the word on the dirt path."
Kate shrugged nonchalantly, "I was thinking that we should probably get married too. You know, for James and everything."
Sawyer sat up on his elbows and looked down at her, "Are you asking me or telling me that we're getting married?"
Kate smiled, "Telling."
Sawyer grinned and bent down to kiss her, "Now that's my kind of woman."
Shannon had a completely different tactic all together. After news spread of the double wedding she began dropping ever so subtle hints. About how nice it was that the two couples were getting married. How James and Adam were lucky to have their parents care so much about them. If there was one thing that Shannon knew what to do it was how to get a guy to do what you wanted him to do. But Sayid was different. He had no reaction to any of her comments and Shannon was beginning to get a little frustrated.
One morning, with Nadia cradled in her arms she marched up to Sayid with tears in her eyes.
"So, do Nadia and I mean nothing to you?"
Sayid looked up at her in shock and confusion, "Why would you think that?"
"You've been ignoring me."
"How have I been doing that?"
"I've been dropping hints for weeks now about getting married and you blow them all off. So what, is this just some meaningless fling?"
With a slightly irritated scowl Sayid stood up and caressed his wife's face, "You know that you and Nadia matter to me. I do not like to have my feelings second guessed." He smiled suddenly, "And I have noticed the hints. I was just trying to make it a little difficult for you. Wait for you to ask me. Besides…" He reached into his pocket and pulled something out. Shannon gasped quietly when she saw the tiny ring made out of glass, "I was waiting to finish this."
Shannon smiled with tears in her eyes, "You want me to ask you?"
Sayid shrugged, "Well, we are both very stubborn. One of us has to ask."
Shannon grinned and let Sayid slip the ring onto her left hand. He reached out then and ran his hand through Nadia's curls and smiled up at Shannon.
"So Sayid, will you marry me?"
Sun had been afraid to ask Jin if he wanted to renew their wedding vows. Their relationship had changed over the past four years and they had been trying to take it slow. Trying to get to know each other again. But she wasn't sure if Jin would want to be involved in the ceremony. He surprised her though one morning while they were taking a walk through her ever growing garden.
"Charlie has told me about the wedding ceremony."
Sun nodded, "Yes, Jack is marrying them. It should be beautiful."
"Jack is not a real priest."
"But it will still be real." She reached out and gently slipped her hand into his. He looked away and Sun continued, "I think it will be good. For them to commit themselves to each other. They will still promise trust and love."
Jin nodded, "I remember our wedding. You were the most beautiful person I had ever seen." He paused as if trying to think of something to say, "It would be nice to go back to that day."
Sun smiled as she realized what he was trying to ask, "We do not have to go back. We can go forward. Renew those vows."
Jin nodded, "Yes that would be nice."
The wedding took place a week later with Jack officiating. They held it on the bluff over looking the water. All four couples looked beautiful, the brides wearing grungy and worn dresses that didn't fit properly and the men, all clean shaven in the cleanest clothes that they could find. Everyone on the island was in attendance as the four very different couples committed themselves to each other.
There was no cake. No florist and no photographer but even Shannon admitted that it was the most beautiful wedding she had ever gone to.
They were happy. As they danced around in the sand to the sounds of Charlie's guitar there were no thoughts of monsters or polar bears. No one thought about their lives before the island. Because in that moment in time it didn't really matter anymore.
But reality set in soon after. Jin died only a month later. Sawyer, five months after him.
Shannon and Claire watched in horror as their friends lost the men they loved, lost the lives that they had worked so hard for. And through it all the four women managed to cling to each other. They guided Kate back from seclusion after losing Sawyer. They helped Sun see the beauty in what she and Jin had shared. They sobbed in grief with Shannon after losing her son in childbirth.
They experienced their lives together and watched their children grow together. Shannon and Kate continued to fight and Sun continued to attempt at peace and Claire always managed to find a way to laugh through it all.
In the fifteenth year on the island everything changed and the laughter was silenced. Shannon, Kate and Sun had been shocked at the death of their friend, unable to comprehend that they would never see Claire's infectious smile again.
But they braved on knowing that Claire would have wanted them to, that it was what women had to do. They took her children under their wings when Charlie disappeared and they slowly learned to laugh again. Shannon and Kate resumed their bickering and Sun continued to make peace.
"Nadia… she's special." Shannon bit her lip and tried to remember what Sayid had said the day before. "She's special."
"All the children are special Shannon."
She shook her head, "No, I mean she's… different." The word almost caught in her throat and it sounded strangled when it came out.
Kate and Sun both looked slightly uncomfortable. It was the one unspoken subject. The one thing that everyone noticed but avoided talking about.
But Kate finally nodded, "She's not that different Shannon."
"Oh yeah!" Shannon stood up and began pacing, "I died Kate. I died and she brought me back. We all know that."
Kate nodded every harder, "Yeah, we know that Shannon, but Nadia is not that different. We all know that too."
Sun looked up, "Claire spoke about it once. About a psychic. He seemed to know that Adam was going to be different."
"She told me too." Kate closed her eyes, "But all the children… things happen when they're around. James… he knew. He knew that something was wrong with Sawyer. He seemed to know the night before. I couldn't understand at the time why he was clinging so tightly to his dad when we put him to bed that night. He seemed so scared that he would never see his father again. He was only three years old. But he knew."
Shannon and Sun responded in silence. They all knew of different events that had happened over the past twenty years. James' uncanny way of knowing when something was going to happen. When it would rain or when a storm was coming in. Or Nadia's apparent ability to heal. The way she would pick up a dead bird only to have it fly off happily only moments later. Or Adam's connection with the island. The way he seemed to be the only one able to control it all. Whenever he was sick as a child the sky would fill with dark rain clouds and pour until he was healthy again. He was always able to find fruit when they went picking. And it was always perfectly ripe. He seemed to always be able to find his way through the jungle. Which was why it was so worrisome when he went missing. Adam had never been lost on the island.
"This island did something to them. To all the children born here."
Sun looked thoughtful for a moment, "I don't know. What about Walt? He wasn't born on the island."
"I don't know. None of it makes any sense."
"Maybe Locke is right. Maybe we've been asking ourselves the wrong questions all this time."
"Oh please!" Shannon threw her hands up in irritation, "What are we supposed to do? Asking questions doesn't get us off this island or make life any easier."
"But think about it. We've been here for twenty years and we've never even been around the entire island. We're too scared to venture far away but it's kept us from figuring out what it is we're scared of. Maybe the answers are out there."
"Well you know what Kate? Some of us aren't interested in finding answers. Some of us just want to survive."
"There's more to life than just surviving."
Sun sighed as the other two women began arguing again, "Right now, maybe we should just worry about bringing the children home. And we have to assume then that whatever makes these children special is helping them survive out there."
Kate sighed wearily, "I know they're out there. And I know that they're okay."
Sun smiled encouragingly, "And they will take care of each other."
They all suddenly remembered the animosity that James and Adam felt for each other.
"I hope you're right."
"Hey ladies?"
They looked up as Charlie rounded the corner.
"Hey Charlie."
"Am I interrupting something?"
"No, is something wrong?"
"It's just that the sun's about to come up and Jack wants Locke to take us to the hatch as soon as possible. You want to come?"
They women looked at each other and nodded. They stood up and brushed the sand off their legs, Shannon muttering something to herself about seeing what it was her brother died for.
The three women followed Charlie back to camp walking side by side in silence.
Thanks for reading!
