Author's note
I apologize for the delay! My life has been slightly hectic lately with changes at work and getting my new apartment.
This chapter was also a bit difficult--as I was typing it up, I realized the original version was a bit trite and not suiting to the series or the rest of the story. It has undergone several revisions and rewrites, leaving me with a result I am satisfied with. I hope y'all feel the same! Please read & respond!
Aurora Rae
Chapter Four
Give Love a Chance
Jerrica
Well, he made it, I thought, anticipation bubbling up again.
As soon as my door shut I was again pleasantly surprised by a passionate kiss from Rio. "You haven't kissed me like that in ages," I murmured against his shoulder. I could already feel a difference in the atmosphere now that we were without the stigma of Jem.
"Then I need to make up for lost time," my lover quipped. We sat together on the bed and he again arrested my body and soul.
I lost myself in the deliciousness of his lips, his delectable scent, and his tantalizing touch for what seemed like a blissful eternity. As we came to round another base, I realized that, as Jerrica, I did not know the reason for this special treatment and long-awaited intimacy.
"Rio," I breathed as he lightly nibbled my earlobe.
"Mmm," he moaned, moving to my collarbone.
"Why are you so... affectionate tonight? What makes tonight so special?" I asked, knowing full well but not wanting to reveal myself... yet.
"What do you mean? I love you, sweetheart." He looked hurt, which pierced my heart. He gazed directly into my eyes and placed his hands on my shoulders. "You are my world, Jerrica Benton," he whispered with intense, bare sincerity.
"Your world?" I repeated, struck by his answer. I have to admit his raw emotion scared me a little. This was the first time he had bared his soul to me. His eyes radiated blatant openness. At this very moment, it seemed that if I were to ask him anything, he would share with me in great detail, with one hundred percent honesty, anything I wanted to know.
"Rio, if I were to... tell you something," I started, not believing my words even after they left my mouth. "Something I've meant to--needed to--share with you... even if it were not so good... Honey, I love you. I love you so much. Please don't be mad, or hurt." Tears fell from my eyes, beyond my control as much as my words. "I could never hurt you," I added, my voice breaking.
He gathered me into his arms, embracing me tightly. "I know, I know," he whispered, stroking my hair. "It's time," he continued. "We have to get everything out in the open. I'm sorry, too, my love... so sorry..." He began to cry with me--silly, it seemed. We had yet to state the reason: that our emotions were so high and the secrets hidden so deep. We just wanted to be finished with the drama, so exhausted were our energy and capacity for it.
"Rio, I can sort of answer my own question, because I was with you earlier," I blurted. Stop! Warning bells went off in my mind. But I was past the point of no return.
"No, you weren't," he answered quickly. "I was with Jem," he added apologetically.
"And she broke up with you, sort of," I continued. "She didn't want to hurt our relationship."
"Okay... did you talk to her?" he asked.
"Don't you get it, you thickheaded man?" I moved away and could not look him in the eye. "Don't you ever wonder how I know what's going on with Jem all the time?" I couldn't bear my own words. So I left them to Kimber. Without transforming into Jem, I began to sing.
"Can't get my love together
No matter how I try.
Can't get my love together,
Don't know the reason why.
Can't get my love together,
Can't make the pieces fit.
Can't get my love together,
Can't make sense of it!
Why do I
Keep going in two directions at once?
It seems like I
Keep fighting a war on two different fronts!
Can't get my love together,
How I wish I could!
Can't get my love together,
But once my love's together,
I know we'll be together for good!
Can't get my love together,
But once my love's together,
I know we'll be together for good..."
"What?" Rio's eyes widened and he scooted back, sitting straight up. "But, why? Why would you keep this a secret from me? I thought you... we... I don't want to be angry, Jerrica, but tell me why!" he pleaded. Hurt and confusion were evident in his eyes. The last thing I wanted...
"I was going to, tried to, so many times. I didn't want to hurt you," I whispered. "Jem hitting on you was a mistake. It was me, and I wanted to be with you. It snowballed, and I didn't know how to tell you... I never, ever, wanted to hurt you. I wanted to... to..." marry you, I finished in my mind. But my mouth could not form the words. I reached for his hand, but he pulled it away.
"How could I be so blind? Here I am, thinking I know you. Turns out I only knew the half of it," he stated. He wasn't angry, I don't think. Usually, when his temper flared, you could see it a mile away. But he was speaking with a strange and frightening acceptance--as if he had resigned himself to the facts, but not to the explanation.
He turned back to me and looked me directly in the eye. "I could have seen Jem keeping this kind of thing up, but you?" He shook his head. "I thought you were above that sort of thing."
"Rio, wait. You don't understand." I grabbed his hand and held on for dear life. "I was afraid!"
"Afraid? Of what? Me?" he laughed mirthlessly. "What could I ever do to you? What would I ever do to you?"
"It's not that as much as... I was so afraid to lose you." I closed my eyes and braced myself for the worst. "Now, I've lost you for good."
"No," he corrected me. "You haven't lost me. I just want to know why you didn't tell me that you were Jem from the beginning. I guess I thought you trusted me more."
"I do, Rio. That's why I'm telling you now. I trust you."
He gathered me into his arms and held me. It was his way of accepting me, no matter what I'd done or what I would do in the future. And in returning his embrace, I gave all of my heart and trust to him.
Aja
Normally, I'm pretty self-controlled. I know my limits and do not cross them.
Not tonight.
Once we entered the room, Craig popped the cork and poured two glasses of the expensive French champagne. He handed me one and we both perched on my small loveseat. "To us," he toasted.
"To us," I replied as we clinked our glasses. I took a sip and savored the flavor and body of the Dom. "Better than I remember," I commented.
Craig put his arm around me and kissed the top of my head. Endearing, but it made me feel like a little girl. "I have some news," he mentioned.
"Really? What kind of news?" I asked.
"Well, I'm sick of being rootless. I've decided to leave the Bluebloods after this last leg of the tour."
I nearly choked on my champagne. "Quit? Craig, you can't do that! You love playing with them!"
"I do," he replied. "But not as much as I want to settle down. I can still drum, even if I'm not on tour. I need to find out what I'm going to do with the rest of my life."
"Oh. You don't know where your life's going?" I asked. Is this his "classy" way of telling me he doesn't want to see me anymore? I wondered.
"I have an idea," he grinned. "I just signed the papers for my new condo--two blocks from here."
"Oh, Craig!" I threw my arms around him. "You're staying? For real?"
"For real!" He flashed that handsome grin again. "To be honest, one of the biggest reasons I'm staying put is to spend more time with you." He held my chin between his thumb and forefinger and tenderly kissed me.
I returned the kiss and ran my fingernails up and down his spine. He deepened the kiss and I leaned back against the armrest, our drinks forgotten. He pressed into me and I could feel him against my thigh. He slid his hand up my shirt without reservation. Under normal circumstances, I'd be pausing the action right about now with some excuse. Instead, I leaned forward and pulled my shirt off, going with the moment and throwing caution to the wind for once.
We made love for the first time that night. I was not a virgin, but I am extremely guarded and cautious about sex. I've been hurt too many times in the past. But Craig had never and would never hurt me. I actually trusted him. I'd never experienced such electric passion before him.
As I was lying in his arms that night, Craig asked me a question. One I was definitely unprepared for. "Aja," he started, "Will you marry me?"
As I said, this was no ordinary night.
