Chapter 4
On my way to the third day of filming, I still don't know how to behave. We kissed, that's for sure. No, scratch that, we had a grope fest. Before that, he had a whole speech that led me to believe that he likes me. I mean, yeah, I'm trying to tell myself 'anyone can talk' but the truth is that he speaks beautifully so I tend to believe him…
Now what? Are we dating? Are we an item? Should I go kiss him once I see him? Should I ignore him? Should I act like we're good friends that don't kiss…?
"Joey?"
There's Jen, my other enemy in the show. She's actually pretty nice, although I didn't get to talk to her much due to my heavy stalking of another co-worker. But she seems nice and I need someone to talk to.
"Hey Jen"
"You look a bit… far away…"
"Yeah… see… I have a tiny problem…"
"Want to talk about it?"
She's perceptive. She's really perceptive. Should I talk to her? I don't know her. She could be a real bitch. But she's got a great smile and that, according to my code, means she's nice. And I really need someone to talk to.
"See there's this guy…"
"Pacey"
"Uh…. Is it that obvious?"
"You two kind of sniffle around each other, yeah…"
I'm looking at her for any signs of irony. Nope, none of that. She's got a nice friendly smile and my walls are cracking.
"See, we went out last night."
"That's great. How did it go?"
"It was weird… I mean, I wanted to impress him but kept saying stupid stuff… and he…"
"He did the same."
"Exactly."
"But did you feel right with him?"
"Yes, I felt great with him! I mean, he's a really great guy… But…"
"But you're not sure he felt the same…"
"I don't know… I'm pretty sure he did feel something since we kind of kissed in the end…"
Jen smiled.
"Cool. So what's the problem?"
"See… we were interrupted by Dawson and… we didn't get to talk about it… and I don't know where we stand…"
"So basically you're wondering if you should kiss him this morning once you get to the studio."
"Yeah" I blush but I also have a huge grin on my face.
"Do you want to kiss him?"
"Yeah!" I say a bit too enthusiastically.
Jen laughs.
"Then maybe you should."
"Yeah, but I'm not sure we're actually… together…"
"Well he kissed you for a reason. If you're not together yet I think it's pretty obvious that you both want to be…"
That sounds good. Okay, so I felt something alike myself, but hearing from someone else that Pacey wants to be with me feels good. I really like Jen, I think she's my new best friend.
"I don't want to rush things" I say hoping that she'll argue with me and give me a really good reason to kiss him. Well, besides the obvious, the fact that I really want to…
"You should do what it feels right. There are couples that get married after ten days and last a lifetime. Rushing things means hurrying into doing things you don't want to do… but if it feels right, you should do it."
I turn a happy face towards her. "Yeah I should kiss him. I'll do that"
"You look really happy"
"I am. I never liked anyone as much as I like him… I feel like…"
"You're going to explode of happiness?"
"Yes! Does that sound stupid? I want to shout to the world that I like Pacey Witter!"
"It doesn't sound stupid. That's how I felt when I first met my boyfriend"
I'm so happy that she has a boyfriend that she likes. I mean, everyone should be happy, the world is a beautiful place.
"Tell me about your boyfriend"
"He's a prick" she says but she smiles. Is that some sort of teasing they do with each other?
"…but you mean that in a good way?"
"Yes, definitely in a good way" she laughs and she gets a happy look herself. You can tell she's really in love with him.
"How did you guys meet?"
"We met in the senior year of high school. He transferred from New York"
"Where are you from by the way?"
"I'm from Boston. You?"
"Boston too… wow!"
"Yeah…"
"So tell me more about… your boyfriend."
"His name is Drue. I liked him the first time I saw him but I thought he was a prick."
"Why?"
"He's the kind of guy that makes fun of everyone. It took me a while to realize that he means well and that he's not after hurting anybody. He just wants to have fun, you know."
"Pacey makes fun of everyone too"
She laughs: "Yes, he does."
"So what happened?"
"Basically we made fun of each other for a while and suddenly he asked me out. I wanted to say no but I couldn't… he was just too cute for words"
I think of Pacey again. He's cute too. Oh, get a grip. Stop thinking about him. Listen to Jen. Become normal again.
"…and?"
"And we've been going out ever since. He's still a prick but he's my prick."
That sounds so sweet. I want Pacey to be my prick.
We reach the set. I'm nervous. Maybe I shouldn't kiss Pacey. Maybe I should watch out for his reaction.
Or maybe I should just wait for him since he obviously isn't here….
He's half an hour late. Where is he?
Nigel seems a bit nervous himself:
"Where is Witter?"
"He had a late night, maybe he slept in" Dawson says and grins at me. It's a friendly grin but I don't like what it's implying. I wish Pacey were here.
He shows up almost the next moment. Yeah, he slept in, I can tell he didn't even wash his face. His eyes are half closed.
"Where have you been, Witter?"
"I'm sorry, I couldn't sleep until morning and I couldn't wake up…" he mumbles.
"Fine, just don't let it happen again. Being an actor is a job like any other, you have to turn up in time if you want to get paid."
He nods and looks so lost and so cute that I get all warm and fuzzy.
"Go brush your hair and let's shoot this. The movie scene. You're all in Colby's room." Nigel starts to explain.
I have to sit next to Dawson, Jen sits on the other side of Dawson and Pacey is in the exact opposite corner. Why is Petey isolated? He's supposed to be Colby's best friend, but Colby always ditches him and leaves him in the sides. That's unfair to say the least.
Our eyes meet and he smiles. He managed to arrange a bit of his hair but it's still messed up. Of course messed-up-hair-Pacey means cute Pacey and I can't help smile back.
"And… action!"
There we go. I start begging for Colby's attention, Colby is wrapped up in Amy and Petey is trying to get noticed but fails miserably. That's what the scene is all about. Then Petey leaves to find someone who actually talks to him. Stupid Colby!
We film this a dozen times and I'm getting sick of it, I didn't even get a chance to say a word to Pacey. Sam is making fun at Petey and I wink at him at some point while saying my lines. That was the best communication we've had.
"Okay, guys, you got to change for the next scene"
I head towards the cabins slowly. My good mood from this morning has completely evaporated. I am totally and utterly frustrated, just like my character, actually. I should get an Oscar for this part since I should be able to play it so well.
Oh wait, they don't give Oscars for TV shows. Bummer.
Now I really know there's no point for this.
A pair of arms squeeze me from behind and my sense of purpose is back.
"Hey Potter, where you off to?"
"I… I don't know…" I say, totally enraptured in the sense of him holding me.
"Well, before you get there, do I get to kiss the most beautiful girl on the set?"
No need to ask me twice. A kiss with Pacey Witter is a must in order for my day to go well.
I smile at him and he kisses me and the grope fest is back.
"Joey?"
The unfortunate to interrupt us this time is Jen.
"Sorry…" she grins "… I thought you should know that everyone's looking for you. We have a scene to tape"
"Right."
One small peck on Pacey's lips, strong resistance towards the temptation to go back to grope-mode and off to the cabins I am.
No need to analyze everything. My life is good.
