Disclaimer: I don't own Xenosaga.

Luna: YAY! More reviews! Sorry for the slow update…I'll try to update quicker.

Chapter 3: Jin shops! For 2 seconds!

Jin hated this time of year. Specifically because it was Shion's birthday. She was picky about all her gifts, especially when Jin was the buyer.

For example, one year Jin bought her a juicer. And Shion said, " So your saying I'm fat and should make shakes with vegetables so I lose weight, huh? Gee, thanks."

Another year Jin bought her a silver bracelet and Shion's comment was, " I'm only worth silver to you, is that it? You allowed Feb, Celiecy ,Cathe and Mom to die, and you can't even get me a decent gift!"

So Jin decided to get her a special book. Totally forgetting that Shion wasn't a big of fan of books and how he couldn't read good.

Since it was his store, Jin didn't have to pay. A money saver as well as a convenience.

One book that caught his eye had the 'curry' in the title. Jin, of course, couldn't read the rest of the title to know what it said. Because the book's title said : ' 100 recipes on how you can make your curry tasteful and look less like mud.'

Poor, stupid Jin.

Meanwhile…

" Hey, KOS-MOS, isn't the most cutest, fluffiest stuffed animal you ever did see?" asked MOMO, clutching the stuffed animal, assuring that if it was alive, it would've suffocated by now.

" That's the 15.4th time you said that, therefore it can't be anymore, therefore it can't be anymore 'cuter and fluffier' than the other 15 you said that to," said KOS-MOS, " Cuteness is irreverent."

" But I named him Mr. Muffin and he's so LOVEABLE!" cried MOMO.

" Our objective is to search for a bunny stuffed animal for Shion's birthday," said KOS-MOS, " Cuteness doesn't matter."

MOMO shoved the stuffed dog into KOS-MOS's face, saying, " AWW! You hurt his feelings!"

" Stuffed animals have no emotions, therefore I could not of hurt what doesn't exist," stated KOS-MOS, trying to push away the acclaimed Mr. Muffin.

But MOMO was persistent. Very persistent.

" Come on, give Mr. Muffin a hug! You know you want to!" said MOMO, shoving the stuffed creature in her face even more.

KOS-MOS didn't understand. There was no logical explanation for MOMO' s behavior. And for the first time, she felt a tiny spark of anger.

In a fluid motion, she scooped up Mr. Muffin and ripped its head off.

" I suggest that you remain silent unless you wish to meet a similar fate to that of Mr. Muffin," said KOS-MOS, calmly.

MOMO only nodded, traumatized.

Back to Canaan…

" I think…I should get Shion something else," said Allen.

" You really think so?" asked Canaan, rolling his eyes.

" Maybe…Luna!" shouted Allen, figuring that the weird disembodied voice was real, too.

" What?" I asked, " You rang?"

" Yeah, um, what do you think I should get Shion?" asked Allen.

" Hm. This is a crazy notion, but maybe you should ask her?" I suggested.

" What, are you insane?" asked Allen, " Ask her? Ha! Big help you are."

" Gee, sorry. Hi Canaan!" I said, and waved.

Canaan looked around frantically to see the speaker, but couldn't find me. Ah, the quirks of being invisible… Canaan shook his pretty head and made his way to the men's department store.

" What are we here for?" asked Allen.

" Shion said that as part of her 'present', I have to wear something different to her party," said Canaan, " That way I don't have to get her an actual gift."

" Right…" said Allen, but followed him anyway because he had nothing better to do with his time.

The 2 men searched for a new outfit for what seemed like an eternity. Everything was either 'too baggy' or 'too short' or 'too colorful' or 'too morbid'. I helpfully suggested he wear a fish net tank top or just go shirtless, but he freaked out asking if I was Albedo.

Then, Canaan finally saw it.

An outfit that was made for him.

It looked exactly like his uniform except one, tiny detail. The zipper and cufflinks were gold. He immediately bought it.

" That's exactly like your old outfit!" said Allen, exasperated.

Canaan pointed to the zipper.

" Well, that changes everything," said Allen, with a sigh.

Canaan grabbed some socks on his way out, completing his gift for Shion.

On the way out, Allen bumped into KOS-MOS and MOMO. MOMO was being unusually quiet, and Allen knew better than to ask why.

" Hello, Allen and Canaan," said KOS-MOS, " Have your attempts at finding presents for Shion fruitful?"

" I guess so," said Allen.

" Why does one have a birthday?" she asked.

" To mark when you were born and age. Except Realians. They don't have birthdays."

MOMO and Canaan glared at him.

" Then…I cannot have one?"

" Nope, sorry. And what are you two complaining about?" asked Allen, " You want to get old, wrinkled, become senile, wear human diapers and die cold and alone? Most people wish they never age!"

" Huh. Has a point," said Canaan, " Never realized how mad at the world you are, though."

" But…I want to be a big girl!" complained MOMO.

" As Allen would state, 'too bad'" said KOS-MOS, " Besides, 75 year old Realians are highly ineffective."

" But-" she began.

" Mr. Muffin!"

MOMO shrunk back in fear.

Luna: Next Chappie: Shion's SURPRISE!