A/N: This chapter is dedicated to my best friend, who had the courage to tell me about her own assault and to "keep on keepin on".
Chapter 10
Alex's Apartment
Casey awoke in Alex's arms, her head resting on Alex's shoulder. Not willing to get up and break the embrace, Casey allowed her mind to wander to the events of the night before. She was right where she wanted to be. She thought of how much fun she had with Alex. And that kiss… Casey absentmindedly began interlacing her fingers with Alex's hand, which was lying across her own.
"Good morning Counselor."
Casey jumped at the unexpected sound of Alex's voice in her ear.
"Sorry," Alex apologized, playing with Casey's hair. "Did you sleep alright?"
Casey smiled. "I slept wonderfully. How about you? You can't have been too comfortable with me blocking all your oxygen supply."
Alex chuckled, sending a vibration through Casey's body.
"Casey, can I ask you something?"
Casey nodded. "Why I just didn't tell you myself?"
"I know you, Casey, you aren't shy."
Casey sagged into Alex, knowing that she had to share everything with her.
"I've always fallen for the wrong girl; gorgeous, smart, talented, but always straight. I never had… gaydar I suppose you could call it. Some were flattered when they eventually found out, some were freaked, and some never even knew. But any way you sliced it, I never got the girl."
Casey paused to reposition herself so that she was looking at Alex.
"There was one girl that was different. She was my first-and only- girlfriend. I thought I was in love, she meant everything to me. And then I caught her in bed with a guy. A guy, who since high school, had been her boyfriend."
Alex's eyes wide, she squeezed Casey's hand, encouraging her to finish her story.
"So we got into a huge argument. I asked her whys he had even bothered with me if she had a boyfriend all along."
Casey was in tears but shrugged away from Alex when she tried to hug her.
"No, I have to finish."
Alex nodded, and returned to holding Casey's hands.
"The sex. She had been videotaping our sex. Her and her boyfriend… they had been using it for their… own personal enjoyment!"
Casey was almost hysterical, but Alex knew she had to finish now or she might never. Casey wiped away her tears with the sleeve of her shirt and took a deep breath.
"I flipped. I started yelling, saying I would tell all our friends what they were doing, that they would be hated all throughout the school. As I turned to leave though, they said there was no way that would happen, and that they would find a way to scare me into keeping quiet. They raped me Alex. They said it was the best sex they had ever had…"
At this point, Alex was in tears as well.
"I got away, told the police, pressed charges, and it went to court. But they got away with it. A police technicality… a technicality!"
Casey had wrapped herself up in a ball at this point, but when Alex got up from the couch to hug her, she didn't resist.
"That's why I couldn't handle prosecuting sex crimes at first. Every case brought the memories flooding back. After a while though, I realized this was what I was meant to do."
Casey looked directly at Alex.
"And also why I was afraid to be in another relationship. I was so afraid of getting hurt again… I wouldn't be able to handle another failed relationship."
Alex took Casey's hand in her own again.
"I will never, ever hurt you. I know that me saying it can't mean much to you…but I'll prove it to you. No matter how long it takes, I will show you whatever you need."
Casey felt completely safe. For the first time in a long time, Casey felt safe in someone else's arms. She leaned into Alex, and they spent the rest of the morning on the couch, learning more about each other.
