A/N: Well... I'm late with this next chapter, as usual. I'll try to be a little more punctual in the future...that is, if you want me to continue with this fic. I've left it alone to gather dust for so long that I'm worried it's lost its momentum and people won't want to read it. (sobs) Anyway, here's Merry's chapter, so enjoy!
xxx Meriadoc Brandybuck xxx
Other names, titles, and aliases:
'Master Holbytla': Merry's name given to him in Rohan. It means 'hole-builder' in their language.
'Master Perian': As the Host of the West departs, Bergil calls Merry 'Master Perian.' 'Perian' means 'hobbit' in Sindarin.
'Esquire of Rohan': Merry becomes an esquire when he pledges his fealty to King Théoden.
'Knight of the Riddermark': Because of his valiant defense of Théoden and Éowyn, Merry was made a knight. The name was given to him by Éomer.
'Master of Buckland': When his father died in 12 F.A., Merry inherited this title.
'Meriadoc the Magnificent': A title given to Merry as Master of Buckland.
'Counsellor of the North-kingdom': In 14 F.A., King Elessar made Merry this job.
'Kalimac Brandagamba': Merry's hobbit name. (Who the hell thought this up?)
Appearance: As with most other hobbits, Merry has a head (and body, most likely) covered with golden-brown curls, that (if you haven't noticed) are often in need of a trim. But don't cut off too much; the shorter curly hair will only seem to hide his pointed ears even more than before, giving him a Princess Leah-ish look to him. Ugh... With a stronger chin and deeper voice than the other three, Merry seems to be the most 'manly' of the Fellowship's hobbits. To add to this, Merry is also the tallest of the four. (He was already taller than Pippin to begin with, and if he and Pippin gained two inches when drinking the Ent draughts, that makes him the largest of the four. Yeah, don't think about it too much; it doesn't really matter.) And, although he spends many months away from the Shire, in the rough, uncultured rest-of-Middle-earth, Merry's fingernails and hands always seem to be perfectly manicured; continuously there to swipe those honey-colored curls away from stormy-blue eyes. (Merry's a metrosexual...so what?)
Clothing: Merry seems to be a guy for fashion as well as manicures; he dresses at the peak of hobbit fashion, sporting both yellow and green. For a good majority of the time, he's wearing one of those floofy white shirts and brown breeches, both hobbit classics. (Can't go wrong with classics, folks!) And, just to make it clearer to those around him that he is indeed a hobbit, that nauseatingly yellow vest catches everyone's eye. Over that, he wears a greenish-brownish waistcoat. But alas; our eyes are still drawn to the yellow vest. Just like the rest of the Fellowship, Galadriel gives Merry one of those Elven cloaks with the leaf-shaped brooch. Later on, when he and Éowyn have snuck into the army, he dons a hobbit-sized suit of armor and a teeny-weeny helmet. He might have passed off as an overenthusiastic young man had he not left his feet and ankles bare the whole time; he looked like a silly little boy with an extremely sharp plastic sword.
Intelligence: We can all assume that Merry is generally a little smarter than the average hobbit, seeing as he's thought up enough escape routes to flee safely from Farmer Maggot and his dogs after stealing veggies with his little cousin. I'm sure he was caught once or twice, though, but cooked up a few nice lies to keep himself and Pippin from being flogged into oblivion. Even though Merry isn't exactly a genius, it was he who solved the riddle-puzzle-thing in Moria, so he's not a complete moron, either. Just don't expect any enlightening conversations about Newton's Laws of Physics anytime soon...
Personality: Merry is one of the happier characters in the series, and is almost always up for a laugh. When they are together, he and his little cousin Pippin are a pair of troublemakers as far as hobbits go, so don't take it too hard if you're the butt of a practical joke or two (or three or four or five or...). Merry shows enthusiasm beyond his small size, as Éowyn experiences when he comes close to slicing off her frock with a sword one evening, but he doesn't have quite as much respect for his superiors as he should. After all, he goes off to war when he's forbidden to because of his small stature. According to numerous fanfictions, Merry is a bit of a flirt around hobbit lasses, so be careful.
Finances: Though I'm not exactly sure what the Master of Buckland is, but it sounds like Merry will reap a nice fortune from it eventually...
Home Economics: Don't be surprised if Merry doesn't know how to cook; Sam did his cooking while the Fellowship was together, and I'll bet Éowyn fed him pretty well while off at war. If anything, he'll ask you to cook for him, and quite often might I add! Hobbits need to eat more than twice as often as humans do for them to stay relatively comfortable, so you'd better learn all the different hobbit-meals and what Merry likes for each of them if you're going to be a decent wife!
Combat: Fighting isn't usually a hobbit's strong point, but since Merry was off at war for so long, it's expected that he generally knows what he's doing with a sword. (He might not try to grab the blade instead of the hilt after all...) He does allow himself to be carried off by Orcs, but he's only about three-and-a-half feet tall, so go easy on him!
Special Skills: Merry doesn't have too many of these, considering he's just an average little hobbit. He can probably do that silent hobbit-walking thing, but then again, what hobbit can't?
Competition: There's a little hobbit-lass named Estella Bolger who might pose a slight problem in your relationship, but I suspect she'll be rather easy to pick off. (Just pour some mercury into her well, and she'll be dead in no time at all!) If you prefer a less-permanent method of getting Merry for yourself (personally, I think that killing her would be easiest; that way she'll be gone forever and you'd never have to worry about it), try cooking for him. After all, the way to a hobbit's heart is through his stomach, so just give one of Rachael Ray's cookbooks a quick glance, and Meriadoc will be yours in about half an hour! Some seem to believe Merry and Éowyn had some sort of romantic fling while off at war, but I'm not too sure about that one. And now would be a good time to mention the popularity of Merry/Pippin slash, if you haven't already noticed it, so I wouldn't completely rule out the young Took.
In-Laws: I suspectSaradoc and Esmerelda will welcome you into the Brandybuck family eventually, even though you're not a hobbit lass, though it may take some time. Merry might be able to change their minds, seeing as he's their only child, and it would be oh-so-unfortunate for them to dislike his true love. Other than his parents, lots and lots of Brandybucks I don't know too much about will be in attendance at your wedding, and when you live at Brandy Hall, they'll be there as well. As for extended family, I don't know too much about them, either. Pippin and Frodo are two of Merry's numerous cousins, so don't think you'll never see them again after the wedding.
In Bed: I don't know why, but I get the feeling that it'll involve food in one way or another. Quite possibly the deed would also take place near a kitchen, if not in it. Merry strikes me as a slightly more-experienced one when it comes to this sort of thing, seeing as he seems to have quite a few lady-friends in fics. So, since he knows what he's doing, let Merry take the initiative and give you a nice evening. He'll probably be a bit of a tease, given his playful personality, and my slightly-sick mind won't give up the possibility of Peregrin joining you once in a while, just for kicks. But probably not. Merry most likely wouldn't go for that incestuous nonsense. But you can always hope...
Bad Habits: Merry, like everyone else in Middle Earth, owns a pipe, which he uses frequently, so expect him to smell a little like pipesmoke once in a while. Seriously, though, if he doesn't stop smoking, his teeth are going to turn as yellow as his vest! Ick! Also, he and Pippin like to do go down to the Green Dragon quite a bit, so don't be offended if they don't invite you. They need their boy-time. (Which, by the way, they'll spend getting drunk, dancing on tabletops, and then staggering home leaning on each other, all the while possibly singing and/or vomiting.)
Other: Since he and his little cousin imbibed the Ent Draught, Merry is a good two inches taller than an average hobbit. (And quite possibly any hobbit.)
Conclusion: Aside from the addictions to smoking, drinking, and overeating, Merry would make a relatively good husband. He'd be open and honest with you, and I doubt
xxx Meriadoc Brandybuck xxx
A/N: Now that Merry's chapter is done, I'll probably do Pippin's next -- wherever Merry goes, Pippin is almost always right there behind him! (refrains from making a Mary Had A Little Lamb pun) Reviews are always appreciated, though not necessary this time since I was so very late.
