Safe Haven – Part 3
For the first time in the three months that had passed since he had taken a bullet to the chest, Paco Beltrán Valencia was scared for his life.
"What the fuck do you mean, she faked her death?" Jason Morgan was beyond irate, beyond furious, beyond all those colorful adjectives that were meant to describe anger but didn't even come close to the raw, turbulent power of whatever was coursing through his veins at the moment. "She has no reason to fake her death – she's a goddamn kid! She paints and makes brownies and works at the hospital! Who in their goddamn mind would want to fucking kill her?"
George opened his mouth, but a warning glare from Paco had him snapping it shut. Jason may have asked the question, but the answer would land them all in even more hot water. Right now, the enforcer just wanted to destroy things – as the poor wooden chairs now heaped in the corner could testify.
"And how the hell am I just finding out about this now? Where was my god damn phone call? Why didn't anyone call me when she needed me? She didn't have to do this!"
Trey shuffled his feet and looked away as his friend stopped, staring at the havoc he had wreaked in the room. A tortured sigh trembled through his chest as he watched Elizabeth sleep on the monitors a few paces away, and Jason sat down slowly on the corner of his desk when his knees threatened to give way.
Paco glanced at each of his friends in turn, and judging from their returned looks, it was obvious that they wanted him to take the lead. He was the one to handle this best – George's innocent yammering, Trey's sardonic remarks, Seth's quick quips, none of them would do right now. What Jason needed was the solid truth; good, clean answers to the horrible, twisted mess.
Jason's voice was low and strained, his back ramrod straight as he stared at the monitor where Elizabeth was mumbling something in her sleep. "Why did she do this?"
His steps were heavy as he ascended the steps, and Jason's entire body felt like lead. Head still swimming from the lengthy and roundabout explanation Paco had given him, the enforcer was just doing his best to put one foot in front of the other and somehow remember how to keep his balance at the same time. It had come as quite a shock to him to learn what Elizabeth had risked to save the Spencers and Cassidines; he didn't think that they were worth her life by any means, but she seemed to. And she was always as stubborn as a mule when it came to helping those she cared for – it was why she had stuck by his side for so long when he sure as hell hadn't been worthy. He couldn't see her drinking poison and crumpling unconscious to the ground, and this was one of the few moments in his life when Jason Morgan was thankful for the fact that his visual perception had been impaired by the accident. Because he never wanted to see something like that; he'd rather be blind than to ever lay eyes on her lifeless body. And knowing that his sweet, beautiful Elizabeth had knocked on Death's door and managed to run away made him want to do nothing more than sit by her side and watch over her. It was a bit too little a bit too late, but it was all that he could offer her.
Her lashes were fluttering when he entered the sunny room, her lips parted on some unspoken word. Chocolate bronze hair streaming over the soft blue pillow, her pale porcelain skin basked in the healthy glow of the afternoon sun, she looked more like a fallen angel than the young woman he had grown so accustomed to leaving and returning to.
But seeing her, so peaceful and defenseless and innocent, only served as an invitation for his anger to come barreling back through his veins. What had she been thinking? Had she been thinking at all? Clearly not – otherwise, she never would have taken such a stupid risk.
"They're not worth it," he growled, grabbing a wooden chair sitting alongside the desk in the corner and pulling it up to her bedside. Jason flipped it around easily and straddled it, crossing his arms over the backrest and glaring pensively at her angelic form. "Damn it, Elizabeth, they're not worth it – no one's worth your…your…"
Your life. No one's worth your life.
"No one's worth what you mean to me," he whispered harshly, unconsciously grinding his chin into the knuckles of his right hand as he rested his head on his fingers. "How could you do this, Elizabeth?" An answer didn't seem possible, even if Elizabeth was awake. An answer didn't seem to exist. Anger made his stomach clench painfully, his heart constrict, his throat tighten. And Elizabeth smiled innocently in her sleep.
Knuckles white from gripping the chair so hard, Jason narrowed his eyes accusingly at her. "You almost died."
There. He had said it. How could he have thought it wouldn't hurt so much to put that realization into words? The words were painful; poison-coated barbs that pierced their way through his heart. Shaking his head, Jason refused to succumb to the images of that threatened to flood his mind; images of Elizabeth's cold, lifeless body lying at the feet of Helena Cassidine.
"You almost died. How could you…Don't you know…Damn it, Elizabeth!"
Her fingers curled, as if she was trying to grasp something in her dream, then relaxed once more.
"Wake up so I can yell at you," he muttered under his breath, shifting his long legs around the legs of the hard wooden chair. "This is a first, huh? Me talking, you sleeping? Too bad for you – you'd probably say you've never heard me talk this much."
Her raven lashes fluttered.
Jason sat still and watched her, willing her in his mind to wake up. Jesus Christ, this was their reunion. Stranded on Sonny's island in the bumfuck Pacific, with a deadly poison swimming through her bloodstream. Stupid woman.
"How do you get yourself mixed up in this?" he demanded, bristling when she slept peacefully on. Damn her for being so unconcerned when all he wanted to do was put his fist through the wall. "What happened to going to PCU and painting? Why did you jump in the middle of all this? And what about…" His throat tightened on the next unsavory word. "Lucky. What about him? Where was he when you were getting yourself killed?"
The words were no sooner out of his mouth than he recoiled, feeling as if something had hit him straight in his stomach. "You…You died for him, didn't you?" She didn't move. "Yeah, I know how that goes. You…you love him. You'd do anything for him."
Jason's brow crumpled as he rested his forehead against the back of his hands on the chair. "But, God, Elizabeth – poison? You let Nikolas poison you? Trey told me about that strain – one drop too much and I…I never would have seen you again, Elizabeth." The thought was too much for him and he peeked out at her, still silent under the powder blue sheets. She looked much smaller to him now, much more fragile, as if the sea of pale blue linen was threatening to drown her. "How did I not know?"
There was a time when he knew everything about her. He had but to look at her face, look directly into those sparkling sapphire orbs and he knew what was on her mind before she even said anything. Those were the days he loved best; when no words were needed. Today was not one of those days – words were needed. He needed her to get up and speak more than he needed anything else. It didn't matter that she'd get up and tell him that she was fine, that this was something she had to do, that she loved Lucky and would be going back to him as soon as the danger passed. It just didn't matter. The only thing he wanted was for her to say something, anything.
"You could have come to me or Sonny," he whispered. His hand moved, as of its own volition, and hesitantly made its way toward her temple. Jason stroked the downy strands of chocolate, memorizing their texture, not wanting to draw his hand away and break his only connection with her. "I would have done anything to help, Elizabeth, you know that. You know me. There's nothing I wouldn't give you if you asked for it."
The corner of her mouth twitched and she let out a soft moan, rubbing her cheek on the pillow.
Jason's hand abandoned her hair and traveled down to her hand. It was small, just as dainty and soft as it had been the last time he had captured it in his. His rough thumb stroked the rose-petal skin, sweeping large, tender, and slightly hesitant strokes across her hand and twining her fingers with his. They fit perfectly, as they always had. For reasons he had yet to put into words, holding her, just this small part of her, filled him with unimaginable content. The only downside was his realization that if she had been awake, he wouldn't be able to do this.
"I didn't know," he whispered, squeezing lightly. "I didn't know, Elizabeth. I didn't know what you were fighting. If I had, I…I would have come back. I would have come back to you. It…It doesn't matter – none of it matters. It's okay that you didn't come away with me. I don't blame you, Elizabeth. I never did. I..It wasn't right of me to ask. But it doesn't change anything – it doesn't change how I…how I feel about you."
He pushed his chair closer with his muscular legs, bringing her hand up to his lips and feathering a butterfly kiss over her knuckles. "If you needed me, nothing could have kept me away. I…I know you don't like the word, but I would have saved you, Elizabeth. You didn't have to do the saving yourself."
If he wasn't mistaken, her hand twitched in his grasp and Jason boldly kissed the back of it. "I just turned my back for a minute, and I come back and see…this." His blue eyes raked a reluctantly admiring gaze over her. "If you were awake, you'd go off on me for saying this, but…I didn't know you had it in you to do something like this, Elizabeth. Standing up against Helena Cassidine is…" He almost couldn't finish his sentence. "I'm supposed to be the one in the line of fire; when did you join me? And how did I not know?"
Jason shook his head sadly. "I wasn't there for you when you needed me. I wanted to help so badly, Elizabeth. I…I was listening to Paco tell me everything about what you did and…I…it was like watching one of those scary movies Emily likes. The ones that don't make any sense, and you know it's not real but you're scared anyway. The worst part was that this was real and I…I left. If I had stayed, if I had taken my head out of my ass for just two seconds…" He stopped, his lips still hovering over the back of her hand, and shook his head ruefully. "I never think in ifs. But you already knew that. I never did a lot of things, Elizabeth. Neither did you. But we're both here. We're both in this."
Her full lips parted, offering him a teasing glimpse of her pink tongue, and Elizabeth's brows furrowed. The hand still in his twitched, her delicate fingers moving against his long, rough ones. "I don't know what will happen from here, Elizabeth. I don't know how long you're going to stay, and I don't know how you're going to go back home." But he did know who she'd be going back home to, and that thought made his stomach clench painfully once more.
But at least Lucky wasn't here right now – this moment was all his.
"But I'll be here for you if you need me." A muscle in his jaw ticked when she stretched slightly, her lashes fluttering lightly. "I'll never forget how I felt when Sonny called me and told me that he'd sent you to his island for protection. That was all he said – he just told me to get my ass back here as fast I could. Do you…do you remember finding me when I got shot?" It was a stupid question, and he berated himself like he imagined Elizabeth would if she had heard him. "You know how you had to pick me up, how I couldn't walk on my own? Getting shot…it knocked the breath out of me, Elizabeth. It just cut through my knees and made it impossible to move or stand independently. It was…just like that when he called. I couldn't think of anything else – I just knew I had to get to you. I'm here, Elizabeth. I'm ready to do whatever you need me to do." He swallowed thickly when her hand slipped from his grasp. "If you'll let me help."
His fingers grazed her temples once more, missing the warmth of her hand in his. She muttered something and turned her face into his touch until his palm was cupping her cheek, his thumb tracing the line of her delicate jaw.
"Nothing's gonna happen to you, Elizabeth," he whispered, his eyes desperately seeking out every detail of her innocent face. "Not while I'm around. Y-You've been through so much, baby." His mouth twitched as he thought of the way she'd blush if she heard him calling her that. "I'm going to keep you safe, Elizabeth, I promise. You mean more to me than anything else in the world, and I'm not going to let you get hurt again. And that's a promise, angel. This time, I get to watch over you."
She let out a soft moan, a muffled mmphth, and wriggled slightly, gradually coming out of her heavy slumber. He watched silently, still as a sentinel, as her eyes darted around the room, apprehensive at first but slowly recognizing the environment.
His hand was still feathering over her cheek, and Jason's heart fluttered when she raised hers to cover his. Her eyes, wide and startlingly blue, met his and he almost forgot to breathe.
Seas of sapphire revealed her surprise that he was actually physically here, with her, and she braved a tremulous smile as Jason's own eyes softened. Fingers twining with his, she cleared her throat softly, a rustling noise in the otherwise quiet room.
"Hey."
