Disclaimer: Arsenal, Man U, Chelsea... who do I support? The Winning Team!
Sorry for the late update, lot's of factors: Homework, Brother, Sister, You know the drill, So I'll make this chapter special! By the way thanks to my Reviewers: ReddisRose and...Erm...You know who you are!
ReddisRose:By the way, technically Tom and Jerry isn't a Loony Toons production, but i'll write it if you suggest two suitible characters.
It was a great idea!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Jamie: Don't fret, Pyro. You look adorable! (Looks to camera) But not as much as me! (Push Me would now like to plug how much Push Me loves Jamie. Plug
Over.)
Pyro: (Looks down at Marty Martian costume) I am not going on like this! I look like an idiot!
Jamie:What's new? Now get on there and perform, there's a whole two people watching! (Points at Reviewers).
Pyro:(Looks at reviewers and waves. WAVE BACK! DO AS I COMMAND!)
Jamie: Yeah, see. So get on there and act!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bobby Duck-Pyro Martian
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Scene opens on a high-tech room with Bobby walking towards A finger scannerlooking extremely heroic with his chest stuck out.He places his finger on the scanner)
Scanner: Who are You?
(Bobby ices scanner and smashes the scanner)
Bobby:Bi-atch. Don't no-one want beef wit' Bobby! Nooo!'Specially no punk-ass computer...
Xavier: Bobby! (Professor wheels on and hugs Bobby calming him) it's Ok. The Scanner is gone now. Sssshhh.
Bobby:>sniff...sniff Thank you.
Xavier:No problem. Now, why I summoned you here.I summoned you because...because...hold the cue cards closer please. Ah, yes. The Institute is low on "In" clothes and no doubt Kitty will soon be heading to the mall to aquire new clothes. We need you to scout ahead and claim the Area as the X-men's.
Bobby:Fear not. I will complete this mission, forI am: (Camera pans out to massive picture of Bobby standing in front of a glacier with a dramatic pose.)
BobbyDrake, In the 21st and 5 centuary! (Clumsily trips over Prof X leg which he seems to stick out on purpose)
Bobby: You tripped me!
Xavier: (Rolls eyes) Yes Bobby. I'm so sure a paralysed 50 year old tripped you. Now go! The X-Van awaits!
Bobby: You'reDispicable... (Ice slides off)
Xavier: (To camera) Little does anyone know, I'm not paralysed, just lazy! (Little Britain spring to mind)
(Cut to garage. Bobby gets into X-van, starts the engine and begins to drive off. He is about half-way through the journey when he realises he's lost)
Jamie: (Holding an Icecream to look cute,His entry is met with a Jerry Springer style cheer and he smiles and poses behind Bobby. Bobby never notices)
>Lick Whatcha doin'?
Bobby: Whoa! (Has to jerk steering weel away from oncoming truck, oddly enough, seemed to be heading straight for him)
Gambit: (In the truck) Damn! Remy miss...
Bobby: Jamie, you scared me! What are you doing here?
Jamie:(Shrug) Making sure you don't screw up, you screw up!
Bobby: Oh no! You're not stealing the spotlight off me this time! (Swings fist, only to have it hit a forcefield around Jamie) What the...?
Jamie: I know, Push Me gave me scary new powers, so as much as you get blown to hell in this, I don't get a scratch!
Bobby: Can you control these powers?
Jamie: No. HE gave me them. The guy upstairs.
Bobby: God?
Jamie: No. Push Me.
(Please note: Push Me does notwish to cause contraversy, and would like to point out that he is way below God, but higher than You! Thank You!)
Jamie: Anyway you do realise, the mall is the other way?
Bobby: Of course I do!
(One Messy U-turn later theyarrive at the mall and Bobby runs out and sticks a flag in the ground)
Bobby: I claim this area in the name of the X-me...
( He is cut off as a silver orb flies over his head, the wind knocking him, and his flag, to the ground. pyro steps out, looking like he's gonna kill Push Me, and sort of "Marty Martians'' over to Bobby.((You know the walk! It's the one where you have the strange music in the background!)))
Pyro: Everyone here's dead. Everyone readin' this Fanfic is dead, and especially Push Me, the bastard...I mean,(Sticks flag into ground), I claim this planet in thename of the Acolytes. Isn't that lovely?(Looks at Bobby on floor) 'choo doin' down there?
Bobby:I fell over, and I'm sorry to say (looks to camera) andI mean really sorry! (back to Pyro) that I've already claimed this area and it's not big enough for both of
us!
Pyro:(Pulls out Disintergration Ray) Oh, I do believe you are right!
Bobby: (To camera) Little does he know I'm wearing my disintergration proof vest.(To Pyro) You may fire when ready!
(Pyro pulls the trigger and a ray hits Bobby, who disintergrates instantly. The intact vest lies on his ashes. Little Jamie runs out and we clearly see him holding a "Reintergrating Ray." He zaps Bobby who appears again in front of him.)
Bobby: whowhatwhere?(Sees Jamie) Oh you, eh? I had him right where I want him, and you interfere. Get back to the van!
(Jamie gives a mock saluit and returns to the van. Bobby sees Pyro walking back to his orb. He runs up behind him.)
Bobby:Ha! Got the slip on you with my Disintergration Ray! And brother, when it disintergrates, it disintergrates!
(He pulls the trigger and the gun...well...Disintergrates. Bobby stares at his hand where the gun was.)
Bobby: Well... waddaya know! It... It disintergrated. Pile of cheap crap!
Pyro: Actually, Mate. It looks like it was sabotaged.Knowanyonewho would have done that
Bobby: JAMIE!
(We cut to Bobby and Pyro in there respective...Vehicles?No...Modes of transport. Swish! Staring at each other through windows. ((Do thoes orbs have windows?))
Bobby reaches for a gun marked "Ultimatum sender" and fires it at Pyro.The bulletstops just short of Pyro and splits open to reveal the message:
Surrender, or be frozen and
shattered into 1,362,99743,032
Ice Shards!
Pyro grabs a gun marked "Ultimatum responder" ((Where do they get this crap?)) and fires it at Bobby. it stops just short of him, opens, andanother bullet comes out and hits Bobby squarely between the eyes. We cut to Pyro as Bobby's respond to the respond arrives.A bullet opens to reveal the word: )
Ouch!
(We see Bobby tuning a small tv in to the same frequency as the mall security cameras)
Bobby: Now, let's see what the little Aussie is up to.
(After a lot of Static, we see Pyro appear on camera. He pointsa gun at the camera and fires, the bullet coming out of the Tv camera and hitting him in the face. While Bobby blows a gasket, we see Jamie nonchalauntly walking across the parking lot, with a lit dynamite stick in his hand, wrapped in a ribbon. He knocks on the door and hands it to Pyro.)
Jamie: Happy birthday, youthing from anotherplanet, you. (He trots off, Ice cream sill intact)
Pyro: Thanks, but Australia isn't actually on another planet. You see...
BANG!
(We cut back to Bobby, still pissed, by the Ultimatum incident.)
Bobby: That's it! The last straw!
( He runs to a button marked "Really cool explosive stuff" and presses it. A ring of Rockets surrounds Pyro's orb, and we see Pyro run to a button marked"Equally cool Explosive stuff,"and a ring of Fosters surrounds the X-Van.We see both laughing and pressing the "FIRE" button at the same time as each of their weapons explode, and the screen goes black.)
(Cut to final scene with Bobby and Pyro, Bruised and cut standing on a tiny fragment of what's left of the mall above a crater. Jamie is fine.)
Bobby: I told youit wasn't big enough for us both, so off you go! (Pushes him into the crater). So once again the day is saved by:
BobbyDrake, in the21st and 5, Centuary!
Jamie: Big deal...
Now picture Merrie Melodies Music and Logan saying"That's all, Bub!"
Jamie: Cut! OK, great show people! Now go see how far Remy took that Truck, we need him for the next scene!
Bobby: (To Pyro)After all we the pain we went through together, Ijust wanna say: I love you, man.
Pyro:Eugh! Gross! You stay away from me mate, or find out what happenswhen you melt an ice-lolly from the inside!
(ANSWERS ON A POSTCARD, PLEASE)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Next up, Remy LePew chases the wrong chick! Read and review for the chance to win... Erm... Jamie! Yeah, Jamie!
