Disclaimer: I don't own anything
AN: There's not much Clana in this one, but it was needed to move the story along. Sorry for the wait, and without any further adieu...on with the story!
Mrs. Kent had cried herself to sleep on the couch in the living room. When she woke up, she was a little confused, but then the events of the previous day crashed down on her. She was too weak and tired to do anything but just lay there. After a little while, she realized Clark had never come home. She went up to his room to check once more, and then headed outside towards the loft. When she arrived at the top of the loft, she was surprised to find Clark asleep with his head on Lana's lap, and Lana with her head against the back of the couch She smiled, then walked back down the stairs to the house. When she walked in the kitchen the phone started to ring.
"Hello?"
"Hi, Mrs. Kent, it's Chloe. I was wondering if Clark ever came home, and if you have seen Lana, she didn't come home or call last night."
"Oh, hello Chloe, well I just saw them, they must have been talking and fallen asleep in the loft. Would you like me to get Lana?"
"Oh no, that's alright. I'll just talk to her when she gets home, thanks Mrs. Kent."
Lana woke up with Clark's head still on her lap. She looked down at him and smiled, he looked so much more peaceful when he slept. She lifted his head so she could get up, then put a pillow where she had previously been, and he didn't even stir from his slumber. She stood up and stretched, her neck was pretty sore from the position she had slept in, but it was worth it if Clark felt better. She walked down the steps of the loft and towards the house. She looked through the screen door, to Mrs. Kent who was slumped in her chair with her arms on the table and her head on her arms. Lana knocked softly on the doorframe. Mrs. Kent looked up and gave Lana a weak smile.
"Hey Mrs. Kent, how are you holding up?"
"I really don't know. It just hasn't sunk in yet, that he's not coming back…" Lana walked over and gave Mrs. Kent a hug.
"How is Clark? Is he alright?" Mrs. Kent asked.
"He…well….he was kind of rambling last night about how it was his fault, and it didn't make any sense, 'cause how could it be his fault?"
Mrs. Kent looked down, she knew why Clark felt guilty, but she couldn't tell Lana that. "I think that he's just….overwhelmed, right now."
"Yeah, I guess. Right now he's sound asleep; he said he hadn't slept for a few days, so he'll probably be out for a while. Is there anything I can do for you Mrs. Kent?"
"I don't think so, Lana. Oh by the way, Chloe called and was looking for you."
"Oh, okay, thanks Mrs. Kent. Are you sure there's nothing I can do?"
"Of course, you just go on home and get some rest."
"Alright, goodbye Mrs. Kent."
"Goodbye Lana."
As Lana drove home, she couldn't help think about what Clark had said. He said it was his fault, and it had something to do with his secret. He said that it was his fault about what happened to my parents, and his dad, and Pete, what was he talking about? And then when I asked Mrs. Kent, she wouldn't look me in the eye. Lana pulled into the Sullivan's driveway, and turned off the car. Her mind was still asking questions that remained unanswered as she got out and walked up to the door.
"Lana! Where have you been?"
"Oh I'm so sorry Chloe, I forgot to call. I went to look for Clark, and after driving around for a while, I went to the loft. He was there, then we talked, and he didn't want to be alone, so I stayed with him, and I must have fallen asleep."
"It's alright; I was just worried is all. How's Clark doing?"
"I don't know; he was still sleeping when I left. He keeps on saying that it's his fault."
"Well you know Clark, whenever something bad happens, he blames himself."
"But why is he so guilty, I mean it's not like it actually was his fault."
"I think its how Clark deals with anything that goes wrong. He feels like he has to save everyone and everything and if he doesn't he thinks that he failed, therefore it's his fault."
"I just don't understand…"
"I don't think we ever will, Lana."
"Well I'm still pretty tired, I'm gonna go to bed."
"Alright."
Mrs. Kent heard a car pulling up her driveway, so she looked out the window. It was Lex; he stepped out of his car and up the porch steps.
"Mrs. Kent, I came as soon as I heard. I've been in Metropolis for a conference all week. I'm so sorry, if there's anything I can do to help, I'd be happy to." He looked around and didn't see Clark anywhere, "Where's Clark? Is he alright?"
"Well, he's asleep in the loft. I don't really know, I haven't gotten a chance to talk to him yet. But from what Lana said, I don't think he's doing alright, I think he a little depressed."
"I'm sure that can only be normal for what he's going through. And how are you handling it?"
"I'm still not sure. I'm still waiting for Jonathon to walk through the door and tell me it's going to be alright." Her eyes were now starting to tear up, and Lex closed the gap to give her a much needed hug.
"Mrs. Kent have you taken care of the funeral arrangements?"
"No, I haven't really done anything, since…" she trailed off.
Lex just waved his hand and said "I understand, don't worry about it; I'll take care of everything."
"Oh Lex, you don't have to."
"It's the least I can do. You and Mr. Kent were more like parents to me than my own." Just then his cell phone rang. "I'm sorry Mrs. Kent, I'll be one second."
She put up her hand and said "No, just take your time."
Lex put the phone to his ear, and started to walk away. Mrs. Kent watched for a second, and then turned to go back inside.
Lex walked back in and said "I'm sorry about this Mrs. Kent, I need to go take care of something. Call me if you need anything, and I'll take care of all of the funeral arrangements."
"Thank you Lex, good bye."
Mrs. Kent watched Lex pull out of the driveway, then walked over to the loft. She walked up the stairs and looked at her son, sleeping on the couch. He always looked so innocent in his sleep. How am I going to do this alone Jonathon? How am I going to be able to take care of him by myself? As she watched him these thoughts and questions went through her mind. All of a sudden, Clark's face contorted into a frown, he started thrashing in his sleep, and yelling.
"No! No! I don't want to be alone! No!"
Mrs. Kent reached over to him and gently shook him, his eyes shot open, he looked around for a second, but once he saw his mother he began to relax.
"Are you okay Clark? You were sleeping then you started to yell, it looked like you were having a nightmare."
"I'm alright." He sat up and looked at his mother; her eyes were still puffy and red. "Mom, I'm so sorry I didn't come home, I just…I was so mad, and I was running, and then I didn't know how late it was, then Lana came, and we talked and I must have fallen asleep, I'm sorry I made you worry…"He was rambling, so he just trailed off.
"It's alright Clark. Don't worry about anything." She reached over and brushed his hair out of his eyes, he looked at her and she began to cry. He stood up and let her cry on his shoulder. He didn't let himself cry because he wanted to stay strong for his mother, so he just held her and rubbed her back until she calmed down.
Once she had calmed down, she asked "Did you have a nightmare?"
Clark was silent for a moment, then whispered "Yeah."
"You haven't had a nightmare like that since you were a little boy. You used to come running into our room, and you father would pick you up and wipe away your tears, then put you in the bed between us."
"I miss him, mom."
"I do too, sweetie."
"What are we gonna do without him?"
"We're going to keep on living. That's what he'd want us to do." There was a moment of reflection and silence, but then Mrs. Kent got up and said. "C'mon, let's go inside, you get cleaned up and I'll make breakfast."
Clark took his mother's hand and got up. They walked out of the loft together and up to the house. Clark left his mother and went up to his room, grabbed some clean clothes and took a shower. Once he came downstairs and started eating, he realized just how hungry he was.
Clark and his mother spent the day reminiscing about Jonathon; reliving childhood memories, and thinking back on what a great father and husband he had been. They had their share of laughs and tears.
Martha was in the middle of telling a story about her first date with Jonathon, when the phone started to ring. Martha got up to answer it.
Clark sat and thought while his mother was on the phone. He was thinking about what would happen without his father. It was his senior year, he was supposed to go to Metropolis University with Pete, Chloe, and Lana, but how could he leave his mother now? The farm needed to be maintained, they had so many hospital bills, and he couldn't leave her now, she would be all alone. He made his decision, he wouldn't leave until the bills were settled, the farm was taken care of, and he was sure his mother was alright. He decided that he would tell his mother, but not now, for now he would keep this to himself.
His mother hung up the phone and walked over to him. "That was Lex. He set up the funeral for us. It's going to be tomorrow." Clark only nodded. The silence hung in the air, then Clark broke it by saying "I'm gonna go do the chores; no one's done them for a few days." Martha nodded and watched her son leave.
Alright, it's time for everyone's favorite part of fan fiction...Reviewing!
