I decided to post another attempt... I wrote it anyway.
#3: The UPS Guy (Joe)
Joe was a UPS guy. He delivered stuff. One day he was assigned a new route, a major part of which was the Eastern Military Base.
Joe walked confidently into the military building carry a package marked "fragile" and addressed to one Col. Roy Mustang. Passing by security with ease, Joe ambled over to the lobby secretary, who readily pointed him in the right direction and advised him to give the package to Mustang and not deal with any of his officers.
Somewhat puzzled, Joe climbed the stairs to the third floor. Taking a left and then another left, he entered the correct office. He glanced at his watch. He was right on time, too.
"Excuse me," Joe announced, "I have a package for Col. Mustang.
"I'll take it," said a blond-haired man.
"Are you Col. Mustang?"
The man rolled his eyes," Yeah, sure."
"I'd really prefer to give the package to the Col. himself."
"Well," said Havoc," that's the Col. over there." he finished, pointing to a short black haired man working busily in the corner. He snickered almost inaudibly.
Joe walked over to the man's desk," Here you are Col., can you please sign for it."
The man looked up, confused. Then he blushed," Oh, I'm not Col. Mustang. The Col. is on his office," Fuery pointed to a door, "and be careful." This confused Joe.
Joe knocked on the door, only slightly annoyed.
"Come in" came a muffled reply. Joe went in. He was surprised to find a man even less productive looking than those outside (minus the not Col.) The man was leaning back on his chair with a cup of coffee in his hands and his feet on the desk.
"You look like a good impartial judge to me, what do you say?"
"Um…," said Joe.
"Hey Col. Moron, why don't you tell him what for?" asked a short boy sitting on the couch.
"Ah, yes. Fullmetal thinks that he can eat more marshmallows than I can in one minute."
Joe turned to the boy;" You're the Fullmetal Alchemist?" he inquired curiously.
"Who are you calling to short to even draw a simple transmutation circle?"
"Brother, he didn't even use a synonym to the word "short" in that sentence. He was just asking, he's never met you before," said a large suit of armor that had just entered the room. His face was obscured by bags of marshmallows. Joe was becoming a little scared.
"Sorry that you were roped into this, mister," continued the face behind the marshmallows," You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. It'll be over soon." Joe just nodded.
Ed and Roy proceeded to count out one hundred marshmallows each, in pile of ten. Joe became just a little more afraid. How much could these guys eat? The suit of armor, whose name he learned was Al, seemed unfazed by the situation.
"Okay, we're ready," said Ed, looking at Joe expectantly.
Suddenly, Joe realized what he was supposed to do. He looked at his watch, " Ready, steady, go!" The race was on. It was hard to keep a watch on the two competitors through the chaos of marshmallows in the air. They were throwing marshmallows at each other and eating at the same time. Joe did not remember that being part of the contest.
"Time, "said Joe. Roy and Ed each ate twenty. Joe had five just for fun. Al pulled out a box of toothpicks and made a marshmallow building to entertain himself.
"So who won?" demanded Ed.
"Umm," said Joe, looking at Al, who shrugged.
"I think it was a tie," Joe finished.
"He cheated," accused Ed.
"Did not"
"Did too! You were using alchemy to get rid of some of your marshmallows!"
"I most certainly did not!" insisted Roy.
"Did I?" Roy asked Joe smugly.
"If I say you won, Col., will you sign for the package?"
AN: I actually had people eat as many marshmallows as they could in a minute. I know some of thelittle thingsmay be off, like the security (or the concept of UPS in this world), but I needed some details (or an idea for a story.)
