A/N: Greetings, people, and welcome to another installment of this...story...thing. Thank you for all of the wonderful reviews I got. It really made me work faster. Someone pointed out that chapter 2 ended in an unfinished sentence. Well I fixed that so thanks for pointing out that error! I added a disclaimer, too. And I brought up my Spanish grade! Woo-hoo!

Disclaimer: Hahahahahahahaha! Like I really own South Park!


"Dammit!" Stan cursed at the game screen. Kyle and Kenny were over at his house playing his Ocamma Game Sphere. He had lost another life and Kenny was winning. Kenny was laughing at him.

"You suck, dude," he giggled. Stan glared and was about to reply when the doorbell rang. Before Stan could even get up to answer it, Cartman walked in.

"You know, you could've waited for me to actually answer the door fatass," Stan told him. Cartman frowned.

"Ay, I'm not fat. I'm big boned!" he said as he wiped some taco crumbs off of his face. From across the room, Kyle rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, whatever. What do you want Cartman?" Stan asked. Cartman cleared his throat in a business like way.

"Well," he said, "how would you guys like the opportunity to win 1,000 dollars. Each." Stan and Kenny's eyes got wide. Kyle's eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"And what would we have to do to get the money?" he asked. Cartman smiled. He had been preparing for this.

"All you guys would have to do is join a certain club and help me win a certain award." Kyle still wasn't convinced.

"And what," he asked, "is this club called?" Cartman's smile never left his face.

"The Girl scouts," Cartman answered simply. His friends just sat there in complete silence for a few moments before breaking out in laughter.

"You have got to be kidding me," Stan choked out. Kenny and Kyle had calmed down, but their shoulders were still shaking with suppressed giggles.

"Fine, if you guys don't want one thousand dollars then I'll just go ask someone else," Cartman replied. This was a bluff, of course. Cartman needed Stan, Kyle, and Kenny or he would never be able to convince Butters to come.

"Sure I want the money, but not that much," said Stan. Kyle nodded in agreement. Kenny, however, was looking at his hands.

"I'll do it," Kenny said quietly. Stan and Kyle spun around and stared at their friend. Cartman grinned.

"I need the money," Kenny explained. "The school fined me $957.86 that time a beam fell on my head. I still need to pay them back." Stan looked back at Cartman.

"I'm still not joining," he said. Suddenly, a piece of Stan's roof fell down and crushed Kenny, taking the Game Sphere with it.

"Oh my God! They killed Kenny! You bastard!" Kyle yelled to the ceiling. Stan was staring open-mouthed at the demolished game.

"M-my Game Sphere," stuttered Stan. Cartman snorted.

"Well, well. Looks like somebody's going to need to buy a new Ocamma Game Sphere, and replace part of his parent's roof. I believe that will cost quite a bit of money," Cartman said happily. Stan sighed.

"Okay, I'll join." Stan turned to look at Kyle. "Well," he said.

"Well what?" replied Kyle. Stan looked at him like he was an idiot. Kyle frowned.

"Fine. I'll join, too. Not like I have anything better to do," said Kyle. Cartman smiled. He had actually convinced his friends to go.

"Great. Now we just need your parents to sign this piece of paper saying that you can go." He held up a piece of paper. "Stan, where are your parents?" Stan pointed upstairs. Cartman grabbed his wrist and drug him to his parents room. There were loud groans and moaning coming from inside of the room. Cartman opened the door.

Inside, Mr. Marsh was trying to move the dresser. By the looks of it, he wasn't making any progress. Mrs. Marsh was watching him with amusement. Cartman cleared his throat. Mrs. Marsh looked over.

"Hello boys. Is there anything I can do for you?" she asked smiling. Stan looked at her.

"I-I want to join the Girl Scouts," he told her. Mrs. Marsh's mouth dropped open. Mr. Marsh stopped moving the dresser and stared at his son.

"You what?" he asked. Stan was blushing.

"I want to join the Girl Scouts," Stan repeated himself. Mrs. Marsh smiled weakly.

"I guess if you really want to you can-" She was cut off by Mr. Marsh.

"No, Stan, you can not join the Girl Scouts. If you really want to be a scout so much, just join the boy scouts." He started to move the dresser again. Mrs. Marsh frowned and turned to her son.

"Is it allowed?" she whispered to Stan. Stan nodded. "Then you can. If you're absolutely sure that you want to," she added.

"He needs permission," Cartman told her. "So sign this." He handed her the paper and a pencil. She scribbled down her name and returned the paper to Cartman. Stan looked nervously to his father. Mrs. Marsh looked at him, too. She smiled encouraging at Stan.

"Don't worry, I'll deal with your father," She told him. Stan smiled.

"Thanks, Mom," Stan said to his mother. He kissed her on the cheek and Cartman and him left the room. As they shut the door, Stan heard a loud "thunk" and Mr.Marsh yell.


Kyle and Kenny, who had somehow re-appeared, were quietly listening downstairs. They were trying to hear what was going on up there. Kyle was extremely nervous about telling his mother. He hated to admit it, but Cartman was right. His mother was a bitch. Kenny's parents wouldn't mind. They could care less about what Kenny did in his spare time. As Kyle was thinking all of this, Stan and Cartman had come back downstairs.

"How'd it go?" Kenny asked. Kyle jerked his head up and watched his best friend. Cartman held up the piece of paper with Mrs. Marsh's signature on it. Stan was staring at his feet, blushing furiously.

"Next stop, Jew boy's house," Cartman said happily. Kyle didn't even bother to reply. His mind was full of the horrible images of his mother, and what she would do to him when he asked her. He gulped, and followed his friends outside into the freezing snow.


What do you think? Will poor Kyle be able to stand up to the raving bitch that is his mother? We'll find out next chapter, so stay tuned! I'll work as fast as I can. Review, or my donkey, he will be sad!