Title: Photographs, Chapter Three: Something New
Author: Mucada
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: JK's
A/N: I should start by saying that I am very New York, and some of that may rub off in my writing, although I try to conceal it, being that these characters are not from the same place as me. I have been to London though, I frequent the city actually, but I have never traveled there in the summer, so I may be off in a few places.
This chapter is a little more Remus and a little less Tonks. This story is what happened during the summer before the kids' fifth year. Nothing about it is really AU, and it is mild to moderate character development, with a chance of romance and banter later in the writing.
Summary: Chapter 3

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Once upon a time
When the world was just a pancake
Fears would arise
That if you went too far you'd fall
But with the passage of time
It all became more of a ball.
We're as sure of that
As we all once were when the world was flat

-DMB

"Where did you say you were going, Remus dear?" came Molly's voice from the hallway above. He glanced back quickly at the curtains that hid the portrait of Sirius' mother. They jerked ever so lightly, so subtly that he probably imagined it.

"Just for a walk in the park. I'll be back before dinner," was his reply. He didn't have to tell her where he was off to, but it was better to tell her now than try to explain himself to her later. She held no shame, or consideration for anyone, badgering them in front of everyone at dinner. Dumbledore had mentioned lightly that he would try to get out of the school for the day to have dinner with them, and discuss something with Remus, something Remus himself had been thinking about all week, wondering what it could be.

One month had gone by, the full moon 2 weeks gone, since Remus and Tonks talked in the kitchen about his lycanthropy. Since then, nothing was directly said about it again, even in their quiet moments at night when they listened to his old records and talked about anything they could think of. He enjoyed Tonks' company more than anyone else he knew right now: he was afraid of how to talk to Harry, who had come to Grimmauld Place 5 days ago, and Sirius was becoming restless by the days, upset that he couldn't leave the confinements of his own home. That was one of the reasons Remus failed to mention to Sirius that he was leaving this afternoon. For one, he and Tonks were meeting after her work, for a walk through Kensington Gardens, which was on the same street at the Ministry of Magic, if you could even say it was on a street. All this made Remus nervous, as he anticipated meeting her. He was unable to explain it however, since they spent a great deal of time together at the Black Manor. But the idea that this was something new was what made him feel restless.

Something new. Tonks was something new. Their sudden friendship was something he would never have expected. It was merely surprising, not strange, and as Remus walked down the street and away from the vanishing house, he began to realize how much he appreciated it. Finding friends always seemed harder as the years went by. He was unable to keep in touch with the muggles he became oddly acquainted to during his travels, because he didn't have a home, or any situated place someone could send a letter to. They were just the promises in far off lands, phone numbers written on lost pieces of paper to call when and if he ever returned, which was unlikely at this stage in his life.

And Sirius. They were at a dark moment in their relationship. Remus waited for Sirius to change, when he began thinking about him again, but he never did. He was still the young man how couldn't get his grip on anything, who was still waiting to get his life moving. It wasn't as if he was making up for the lost time in Azkaban, it was more like he pushed that entire period in his life out of the perspective, and wanted to pick up where he left off. He wanted to pick up where he and Remus left off, which was shaky to begin with, and something that Remus was unwilling and unable to do. Remus wasn't 20 years old anymore. He lived much of his life already, as far as he was concerned, and Sirius only saw Remus' movements as mere stories, not actual events that happened.

Still, Remus knew Sirius more than anyone, which helped because he hadn't changed since he returned. And besides being unable to find his balance with Sirius, he was unable to find ways to look past all that pain and anger he felt for Sirius during the time he was in Azkaban and was good as guilty as far as Remus knew or wanted to know. There were things about Sirius Remus never let go of, or wanted to forget about: things that Remus never noticed when they were young, but let come to the surface when Remus was sure he hated Sirius. This was the hardest to explain to himself. There was no feeling like it. Sometimes he felt that his life would have been better off if Sirius had always been guilty, it would have just given him that clear pain that he had grown used to dealing with. But now, if was something different, having to switch his hatred to another person, and having to take the animosity off of someone who never actually deserved it.

Then again, everyday he wished for his friends to be back: for Lily and James to have lived to see their son grow up and for Sirius to have actually lived through young adulthood. And for Peter, for Peter to not feel that his friends had little faith in him.

But nothing ever works out the way he wished it did, or he would never constantly think about what could have been.

He had subconsciously led himself into the run down underground near the street, and he stood in front of the metal turnstile, fumbling for his wallet as people walked around him. As he went through, he mapped his route in his head, gambling with his luck of actually taking the right stop. He knew the London Underground like any other muggle, but it had been years since he found himself needing to use the system, not since he had lived in the city after Hogwarts. He had then traveled for years, ran out of his small fortunes and the money Dumbledore gave him for Order business, and then was called to be a teacher at Hogwarts. After that one short year he used the money he made at Hogwarts to move to Paris –a spontaneously dangerous one- and then the Order formed again, bringing him to the Black Manor…

The compartment wasn't as crowded as he thought it would be, and the ride was neither long nor short. As Remus sat down, he quickly scanned the tube that was scattered with a few people: a few homeless looking fellows and a woman with a small child. The old train turned, and Remus watched as all the silent passengers swayed with its movement.

When he exited the station at High Street, he emerged from the Underground into strikingly different settings. The sun was sitting low on the horizon, casting its glow onto the busy street filled with tourists, people leaving work, and late shoppers and early diners. Remus didn't have to wait long before he saw Tonks walking out from an alleyway across the street, nonchalantly walking down the darker street. She stopped at the walkway with the rest of the people, waiting for the light to change. He watched her, realizing that this was the first time he ever saw her in public, walking amongst muggles and strangers alike. Not that it mattered, just something new.

When she reached his side of the street, he walked up to meet her, and she gave him and cheerful, friendly kiss on the cheek, touching her hand to his forearm.

"You made it," she said, even though she didn't sound surprised, "I wasn't sure you'd know what it looked like to get here."

"I took the tube," he said, as they walked into the nearest entrance into the Gardens. His face still tingled.

"Really?" She sounded mildly shocked.

"Preferred transportation, actually."

"You wander around the world like a muggle," she stated, her voice lowering as an entourage of middle-aged women briskly walked by, causing him to lean down to hear her, "Don't you get tired of it?"

"I just…find the satisfaction of a long journey rewarding, to say I came a long way. Sometimes magic makes us move too fast." She didn't see his way, but she was still young and didn't understand there was magic in the simple things. She probably wanted to rush through everything, like he did when the world was still newer to him. He just smiled, his fall back emotion that usually kept him out of trouble, especially with women.

As they walked, Tonks grabbed his hand at one point and held it without looking at him, only drawing his attention to one thing or another, like the moment wasn't happening. He felt sixteen again, and he wished that he didn't. She had no idea, her motions not deliberate or directed to him in the way he imagined them to be. Why was this happening now, when he felt his life was only at a standstill? He didn't expect anything new, and the new was Tonks, who came at him at high speed.

Tonks watched in fascination as two boys went past on skateboards, and she whispered excitedly, "That looks so wicked, whatever it is! We should try it sometime!" He couldn't help it, he laughed right at her, imaging Tonks, a woman who swore the umbrella stand moved each time she entered the house, keeping her balance while moving on wheels.

"What? Don't you laugh at me, Remus Lupin!" she exclaimed, swatting him on the arm.

"I'm sorry, love," he said, expecting another blow, but her attention was already adverted as they came to the Albert Memorial. She reminded him of a hummingbird. The gold statue sparkled in the sunlight, the entire structure impressive with its stone statues on either side of the throne and gold fencing.

"I'll give them credit for their lovely monuments," Tonks said with fake indifference, "but they don't move."

"Sometimes they aren't meant to. This fellow's sitting down, anyway."

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Later that evening, Remus and Tonks found themselves in one of London's many mews, leaning against the brick wall of a closed store. They peered in through the glass door. Tonks groaned as rain fell against them.

"No one's in there, we can apparate."

"The rain will clear soon," Remus said, stuffing his hands in his pockets. She watched as water ran down his lovely face, against the line between his eyebrows that formed when he brought them together in frustration.

"Who cares, let's get out of here before we get soaked through," she said, looking at him.

There was a beat before he said rather weakly, "Someone will see us."

"There is no way in hell that I'm waiting to go catch a tube," she said, knowing exactly what he was thinking. She pulled out her wand and he sighed, doing the same only after he looked around in all directions, up at the flats around them and onto the main street. People rushed about, some with umbrellas and others holding their newspapers and bags over their heads.

She imagined the warm kitchen of Grimmauld Place, Molly hopefully there cooking. With a crack she was out of the cold rain and in the kitchen. Everyone was sitting at the table like she imagined them, and they all looked up, Sirius, Molly, and Arthur all pulling their wands out at her. Within a second, Molly cast a drying spell over her and saying, "We weren't expecting you for dinner Tonks, but there's plenty here," as she prepared a plate for Tonks.

Remus arrived within a few seconds, and she gazed at him eyebrow rose, wondering what took him so long to follow her. He merely cast a drying spell over himself and offering her a faint smile that seemed to say, I don't know what you're talking about. He sat down next to her, acknowledging everyone seated at the table, stopped last at Harry and offering him a small smile. Sirius was sitting across from Tonks, and he gazed at her for a brief moment, then turning his full attention to Remus. Neither said anything as they stared at each other, like they were silently willing each other to move forward, as if by wandless magic.

Ron was talking excitedly to the twins, Ginny, Hermione, and Harry, causing Hermione to scold him, Harry to smile in mild and distracted amusement –a look shockingly similar to Remus' nonchalant gaze- and the twins and Ginny only laughed with approval. Sirius seemed to be listening in with suppressed amusement, a reminiscent gleam in his eye Tonks could only identify as subtle pride.

Molly broke the silence amongst the adults, saying, "Mad-Eye and Kingsley said they would stop by for dinner, didn't they, Arthur?" He nodded.

"Last I saw them before I left they were no where to be seen, but Moody isn't one to break promises," Tonks replied, taking more potatoes as Molly offered.

"And the Headmaster said he would be arriving as well," Arthur said, looking directly at Remus, who looked unmoved but she could feel him rippling under the surface. He took a long, silent sip from his glass of whatever gave him ease for the night. At the mention of Dumbledore, Tonks saw Harry look over to at them, and she caught his eye. It scared her how he made no indication, turning back to his friends and replying to something Hermione said.

Dinner progressed in the same fashion, and Kingsley and Moody arrived shortly, ringing the doorbell outside, which caused the portrait in the hallway to begin its tirade. When this happened, Remus sighed and stood up from his seat to let them in and silence the painting. They were all well into dessert, but Molly fixed them both with a plate of her wonderful food, only after scolding them for entering in such a way, and saying that they should have known better. Remus smiled brightly for the first time since they entered the old manor, which earned him a glare from Molly. Such a spitfire, that one.

Soon, everyone moved into one of the old sitting rooms that were already cleaned, while the kids were shooed upstairs by Molly. Remus and Tonks remained in the kitchen, sharing the one smoke left in his packet. It gave her a small thrill, passing the lit cigarette between them, and the one end that touched his mouth touched hers as well. They said nothing, and the moment felt like an old ritual even though it was something new. Remus did that to her: made everything new feel like a normal occurrence, like she was waiting for it her entire life and didn't even realize when it finally came.

The fire behind them crackled, and Tonks and Remus turned around to see Albus Dumbledore's head being licked by the flames. In no time, his entire long and brittle form folded out of the hearth. His blue eyes twinkled as always, a surprisingly strong light coming from such a lined face. He smiled tiredly at them both. When Remus stood up to shake his hand, the older man gently grabbed his shoulder, and Tonks could feel something pass through the air, but it was forgotten almost immediately.

"Miss Tonks," her old Headmaster said, as she stood up and took his hand, "I was wondering if I could have a short word with Remus alone."

"Of course," Tonks said, not shocked. She left the room and joined then rest of the adults in the cozy sitting room. She was surprised that she hadn't knocked over any furniture on her way there.

"Dumbledore's here," she told everyone as she sat and took the small glass of liquor that Sirius offered her.

"Is Remus with him or did you leave the poor man alone down there," Sirius asked brightly, obviously happy with the amount of alcohol he already consumed. It always seemed that everyone around here either spent their time smoking or drinking, but Tonks didn't even have to question why as she shot the hard liquor back, burning her throat and mouth. The pain lingered but she didn't mind.

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"How have you been, sir?" Remus asked, watching Dumbledore slowly lower himself into the nearest chair. He sighed with the effort, and with nervous movement Remus had never seen before, he looked around the dark kitchen with heavy eyes. Remus felt more anxious and restless, so he stood up and began to feed the fire behind them, giving the once dim room more light.

"I have been better, my boy," he said. Remus kept his back to him as he poked the fire.

"Can I get you anything? Something to eat, something to drink?" he asked, making his way around the table and to the counter where he began to handle the glasses in the cupboard noisily. He felt like he was in school again. How many times has he found himself alone in the headmaster's presence, most likely in trouble? He felt like he was awaiting punishment: it was like a reflex.

"Perhaps a small brandy," he said, indicating a few centimeters with his right thumb and forefinger. Remus began to fix the drink, along with a glass of water for himself. If it was something serious they were going to discuss, he would piss himself away later that night, but not in front of Dumbledore.

Remus watched as the headmaster drew out his wand and cast a silent spell over in the direction of the door. He wondered but said nothing, yet Dumbledore told him anyway: "To keep young eavesdroppers away." He smiled, light eyes twinkling.

"I wanted to confide in you, Remus, about something I don't necessarily want to leave this room."

"I'm listening, sir," he answered, staring not at the other man but at the drink he put down in front of him, the liquid dancing back and forth against the sides of the glass and reflecting the light of the fire. At once when he put it down Dumbledore picked it up and held his glass out, which Remus toasted with his own glass of water. Neither said anything, but Remus held the other man's gaze as they took small sips.

"I have been troubled lately, mostly in the mind. It's hardly a grave issue as of yet."

"Then why are you telling me?" he asked, still unsure of what they were about to discuss.

"I have no intention of troubling you, all I am asking is your word and perhaps a little comfort," he said, adding in a lower voice, "which I fear will soon be hard to come by."

"Are you talking about the Ministry, how they can't see—"

"The Ministry will realize the truth soon, Remus."

"You don't suspect that Fudge is only pretending to not believe? That he really knows about Voldemort?" Remus knew because of the situation they were all in, what Dumbledore wanted to talk about, yet he let himself be shocked if not a little burdened. He wished for a cigarette.

"No, no, he is only denying Voldemort's return. He just doesn't want to believe that this is happening again. I don't blame him. You know as well as I do."

"Yes, but—"

"We should just leave it at that. Do not fret over the Ministry; we have more important things to worry about. Politics aren't what I came to talk to you about. I have been concerned lately, about Harry."

"Haven't we all," Remus said dryly. He felt himself swallowing the rest of his water down quickly, just out of the urge to do something with his hands and mouth.

"I want you to watch him for me," Dumbledore said, tilting his head down.

"We all are, sir."

"No, I don't want you to only watch out for his wellbeing, I want you to be careful around him. I am not blaming him, but I fear that Voldemort has an influence over him." he looked up, his eyes filled with such fatigue and such anxiety, Remus felt like the only thing he wanted to do was lie down somewhere and sleep for as long as it took for him to wake up and find the war over with and Voldemort gone.

"You think Voldemort plans to use Harry against the Order?"

"I'm not sure yet, but ever since last year, I have felt uneasy around him. It has been hard for me too look him in the eye, because I get this feeling that Voldemort isn't far away. It is almost as if Voldemort is present within the boy."

Remus sighed, saying, "It may be possible. But Harry knows how to fight his demons. He's been doing it for a long time now."

"Just promise me to keep an eye on him. Look for the unexpected. He is only human after all. I think we sometimes forget that."

"He has been on the edge lately, because he couldn't leave the Dursley's." The headmaster nodded, and Remus continued, "He questions you. He blames you." Hermione had told Remus, one late night not long ago that Harry was fed up and wanted answers. She was frustrated that he was mad at her and Ron, even though it wasn't their fault. Besides other things, Remus admired her for her truthfulness with herself, as well as her faith in the Headmaster. Remus could do nothing for her, only listen as she unburdened herself onto him, pleading for him to be the one adult around here that trusted her and her friends with the business of the Order. He was sorry to have let her down, but he had as much faith in Dumbledore as she did.

"I know. I am ashamed to admit that I have been avoiding him."

"Will you see him tonight? He's upstairs," Remus said, motioning with his hand above the ceiling.

"I can't," he said, rather weakly for a man of great power.

"Alright," Remus said, a little ruffled with the other man's sudden change in heart. He stood up, and Dumbledore followed.

"I will have to say goodnight to everyone. Anyone out of the ordinary here?" he asked, making light talk as Remus collected their glasses and placed them in the sink that was already crowded with the night's dinner.

"The usual, plus Mad-Eye Moody and Kingsley Shacklebolt."

"Yes," he said rather distractedly as they walked up the stairs, "Yes, after that I must be off. The school needs its headmaster right now. You know Minerva, she's a blessing but unfortunately turns ferocious while under stress. I am already short on teachers and it would be tragic downsizing if we lost anymore."

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