Isn't he dead yet?! - by Kloudy Reignfall
Summary: James and Sirius are reunited at the gates of Heaven, but it's not quite like old times yet. They begin to wonder if Remus is ever going to hurry up and die.
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Damn you if you thought I did.
Warnings: Slight (for now) slash implications.
OMG I cannot believe I got so many reviews for this damn thing!!! That is fricking awesome!!! You all make me so happy! ::sob:: Anyway, since I realized that this is now the only story I have with less than two chapters I decided to write another and post it so that they're all at least almost even. :-D Hope you like it! (Btw it was written totally spur-of-the-moment, so it's a little crazy…)
Replies to Reviewers:
DarkLadyOfRavenclaw: Thanks for being my first review!!!
Barbarataku: I made someone cry at work? Hehe.
KaliedescopeCat: Sorry, I have no idea who the Gatekeeper is supposed to be. I'm not religious, but Gabriel sounds like one of those religious names.
Nikki and Sage: Hi guys! I miss you! Hope you like it! (Oh, can't wait til xmas, maybe we can finish our Random Volleyball story!)
Sumrandumperson: Hey, you're smart! You guessed exactly what's gonna happen! Yay for smart readers! Lol
And to the rest of you: Thank you so much for the review, but I can't write a reply to all of them…
READ IT!
Chapter 2 - Still the beginning of Forever
"PRONGS! What are you doing here?!"
James just blinked at his friend. "I'd dead, you idiot! Why else would I be here?"
Sirius just shrugged. "Maybe you were just visiting?"
Prongs shook his head and smiled. "Just get over here."
Sirius looked at the gates that separated the two best friends. They were big. And shiny. He liked shiny things. But they didn't look like they were moving. So he turned to the gatekeeper dude that was still standing behind him.
"Hey, guy. Wanna open these things for me?"
Gabriel glared. "Not until you apologize."
Ok, now Sirius was confused. Why should he apologize? He wasn't the one that tried to molest somebody!
"Apologize to the lord for your sinful behavior," Gabriel said, having read Sirius's thoughts.
He didn't wanna get into another fight with this creepy guy, so he just did what he was told. He got on his hands and knees and did one of those waving bow things, like a peasant at the feet of a king. "Oh, forgive me father for I have sinned!!!"
You had to be pretty deaf or stupid not to hear the sarcasm in his voice, and Gabriel didn't hear it, so he must have been one or the other.
Gabriel looked "at the camera" (which is to say, straight at us. No, we are not filming a movie!) and frowned.
"I'd appreciate if you took that back, young lady. Don't you know it's a sin to bad-mouth the lord's gatekeeper?"
Author girl stuck her tongue out at Gabriel. "I don't give a flying fuck! Go the Hell away, bastard!"
Gabriel looked indignant, but he just crossed his arms and got on with the story. He looked at Sirius, who was trying his very hardest to appear innocent, at least until he got past these large shiny barriers that were the gates of Heaven. Then he could act like he wanted. So Gabriel nodded and the gates swung slowly open. Almost nervously, Sirius took a deep breathe and stepped forward, through the golden gates.
A blinding white light flashed as he passed through, and when he opened his eyes he saw ---
"New York? What the fuck is this?"
James, standing right beside him, flung his arms wide. "Welcome to Heaven!"
Sirius took a look at James's face. "Oh my God, they've brainwashed you! Get away from me, Zombie!"
Prongs doubled over with laughter. "Hahaha! I'm not brainwashed, dipshit! I'm just really happy to see you!"
"Whew! Well, if that's the case…" Padfoot made a flying leap at his friend and glomped him to death. Well, not to death, ya know. He was already dead. "Ahhh!" he cried. "Prongsy, I've missed you so much!"
James grinned, very pleased. "I've missed you too!" Hmm, this was an interesting position they were in, Sirius with his legs wrapped around James, sobbing happily into his shoulder. It was almost tempting… But he restrained himself and set Paddy down on the pavement.
Sirius wiped his eyes and looked around. It really looked like they were standing in New York City. What the Hell was up with that? He turned to James for an explanation.
James looked around at the city. "Oh, this is just Downtown Heaven. It's where most of the people live most of the time. Upper Heaven is more the place for vacations and all the rich folks and angels."
Sirius just blinked stupidly. James laughed at that expression. It'd been such a long time since he'd be able to see that in person. "Oh, let me show you around!" he said to his friend.
The two walked around town for a while. James showed Sirius the parts of town where the streets were paved with gold, and he showed him the huge fountains of wine. They passed the giant superstore where you could buy things like Love and Happiness while shopping for your groceries. (Sirius was really tempted by the Freedom and Passion, but James reminded him that he didn't have any money.)
As they were walking, Sirius spotted two giant towers. "Whoa, what are those?" he asked, although he thought he knew the answer.
"What? Oh, you mean the Trade Towers? Ha, what? Did you think only humans went to Heaven?" James laughed and they continued on their merry way.
Eventually they came to a building that was just like most of the others (pretty rundown, but still sturdy looking), but which they stopped outside. Sirius looked expectantly at James, who grinned happily. "Well, this is home!"
Sirius suppressed the urge to say his opinion, which was something along the lines of "What?! You live in this shit hole? You gotta be kiddin' me!", and shrugged, following him inside.
They climbed up a flight of stairs and came out into a hallway, which was full of identical wooden doors. Some people's heads poked out--- young children, middle aged people, and old women in curlers. They waved friendlily at James and his new guest and then pulled their heads back inside. This slightly unnerved Sirius, but he spoke nothing of it.
Finally they came to the door at the end. It wasn't locked apparently, because James just strolled right in. Paddy followed.
It was a normal apartment. Kinda small, kinda dark because the shades were drawn over the big sliding glass door that led out onto the balcony. James walked over to them and pulled them back, revealing a balcony that looked out over a beautiful scene: a vast expanse of clouds through which Sirius could see bits of what might have been England.
He was entranced, but the spell was broken when Prongs laid a hand on his shoulder. He jumped a little bit at the contact, but his mind was pulled back to earth. …I take that back. His mind was pulled back into the clouds.
He looked around for a minute and then a question popped into his mind. "Hey, James, where's Lily?"
James scratched his head. "Oh, well she moved in with some beautiful angel in Upper Heaven. We've been apart for a couple of years now, but she still comes down to visit me sometimes." His voice was heavy with hatred. Spiteful much?
Sirius moved to his best friend's side and gave him a big hug, more serious and nothing like the glomp from before. "I'm sorry.
He laughed, trying to play it off as nothing. Actually, their separation didn't bother him that much, but he did miss Lily sometimes. But he had an idea that cheered him up. "Hey, Sirius, come with me." He pulled his friend by the wrist into the hallway of his little apartment.
Sirius slowed down apprehensively as he saw they were heading for the bathroom. "Um, what are we doing in here…?" he asked, a little freaked out. Too many weird memories of things that had happened in bathrooms…
Prongs scoffed. "Geez, it's nothing like that, you pervert!" He knew exactly what Padfoot had been thinking. "I have something to show you." He got on his hands and knees by the bathtub, leaving the toilet for Sirius to sit on.
So Sirius sat, wondering what the hell was going on with his friend. James reached over and twisted the knobs, the faucet filling the porcelain tub with cold water. Then when it was more than halfway full, he turned off the faucet and grabbed a little cloth bag of powder from behind Sirius. James took some in his hands and sprinkled it across the surface of the water, watching it dissolve into the liquid.
"Now," he said, turning to Sirius, "Who do you want to see?"
Paddy gasped with excitement. So this was how people in Heaven watched over their loved ones. He thought for a minute, and then said, "Definitely Harry."
Prongs smiled. "Yeah, he's my favorite to watch."
The surface of the water began to swirl and then a scene appeared within it.
The bedroom was furnished in beautiful deep greens and rich mahoganies. A blonde haired boy was sitting on the four-poster bed, looking at himself in a hand mirror. Then a knock came at the door.
"Who is it?" the blonde called.
The door cracked and Harry Potter slipped through, closing it carefully behind him. He looked at the blonde boy and sniffled. "Draco…" he cried pitifully.
In an instant Draco was across the room comforting the black-haired one. He pulled him over to the bed. "Shh… What's wrong, love?" he cooed.
"I… I just can't handle it anymore. I miss Sirius!"
Draco hugged Harry closer. "It'll be alright, okay? Everything will be fine."
Harry sniffled into Draco's shoulder a little more. "Yeah, I know. I'm just … lonely."
The blonde nuzzled Harry and moved his mouth down to the other boy's lips. They began to kiss passionately, and maneuvered themselves into a better position on the bed, the blonde haired boy leaning over the brunette.
James and Sirius watched the bathtub with wide eyes, occasionally muttering things like, "Wow", "Ooh," and "How do they…?"
Sirius, with his mouth still wide open, turned to James and found his friend smiling. "Ah," James said, "My little boy is all grown up, being ravished for the first time! And he's just like his father!" Prongs was glowing with pride.
Sirius could understand the 'first time' remark, but…
"What the hell do you mean, 'Just like his father'?"
James gasped and threw a hand over his mouth. (A little too late.) "I… Well, I, uh…"
Padfoot stared at him suspiciously, his eyes narrowing in that scary way. "…You mean… you mean you did it with Lucius Malfoy?!"
This got Prongs to being nostalgic again. "Ah, my first boyfriend… Those were the days…"
"You did it with Lucius Malfoy?!"
James got almost defensive. "Hey, they didn't call him Luscious Lucius for nothing! And I'll have you know I'm not the only one!" He looked around nervously. "Frank Longbottom did it too! And Cornelius Fudge! …Of course, that was before Luc started going out with Sev…"
Sirius shook his head. "Okay, weird. I'm going to bed now…" And he started to the couch in the living room.
James followed him. "Hey, what are you doing? Aren't you going to sleep in my room?"
Sirius looked at him, a little freaked out. "No way! Not after that!"
Prongs looked hurt. He kneeled down in front of his friend and quivered his lip a little.
"Hey, no. None of that! I'm the dog here! Only I get to use the puppy face!" But he couldn't resist such a pathetic look. He sighed. "…Oh, alright."
James squealed and jumped up, running into the bedroom and hopping on the big bed, with Sirius several yards behind him. He came in slower, sad down on the bed and stripped off his robes (which he just realized he was still wearing, even though nobody else in Heaven had them on). Then he got under the covers and closed his eyes.
Everything was silent for a moment, and then he opened his eyes. James was laying next to him, staring at him happily.
"I'm so glad you're here. I've missed you a lot!" Sirius only stared at him, and James smiled back with bright eyes.
"Goodnight, Paddy!" he said with a big grin.
Sirius smiled softly. "Goodnight, Prongs."
The End of What is Still the Beginning
Wow, that turned out to be a lot longer and quite a bit sappier than I had anticipated. But I still love it to pieces, just for no reason. It wasn't so bad, was it? Well...
Please review!!
Lol. I do love reviews! And since we're on the topic of what I like, I like it when people read my other stories! lol. Wishful thinking, I know, but oh well. Thank you for reading my story and all, and sorry it was so weird!
