It was a few weeks to the day I had announced my pregnancy to Anakin. My stomach seemed to grow each day, and in the first few days, it enchanted Ani like nothing I'd seen. But things began shifting, and I could feel it. It was the inevitable feeling that we were made of glass and would break if not handled with care. Thoughts I knew I shouldn't have about him still loomed in my mind as though they were waiting for the day I'd admit the thoughts were real. That day would not come, not by my own will.

"Good Morning." He said, as I emerged from the bedroom.
"Good Morning." I yawned, stretching upwards.

I caught his eyes scanning my stomach, as he always was. It was as though we were afraid it would disappear if we didn't watch it. We were both staring at it a great deal lately, but I noticed that Anakin's eyes were terribly different than my own. "Something wrong, Ani?" I asked, placing my hand over the pudge in my stomach, a bump that was pretty noticeable to strangers, though I prayed they'd not have the audacity to tell a senator she'd put on weight. His eyes diverted quickly to my own, and a half smile crossed his face. "No, nothing." His voice was anxious and a little jumpy. "Are you sure?" I closed the gap between us and sat in a chair beside him. "No, no. I'm fine. How are you this morning?" His voice had a hint of absence. "I'm great." My curious expression seemed to grow. He managed little more than a mumble. I knew that had I continued to ask if something was wrong it would only end up to be a self fulfilling statement. I wanted to ask, but I bit my tongue.

He doesn't need you to stress him out.

I wasn't really sure where everything was supposed to go from there. What to say, or think or do. "Oh…" I grabbed my head. It was another of my horrible headaches. My body flowed with a sensation of pain tingling inside it. "Padmé!" Anakin cried as he darted over to me. My face was contorted into a scowl and rather ugly looking at the moment. "An-Ani, I'm fine..." I protested. "Shh…tell me what's wrong." He demanded, holding my hand tightly. I tried to focus on the pressure of his hand holding my own rather than the sick feeling creeping through me. "It's my head, Anakin. My head again…" I held onto my left temple with one hand, and clenched my hand around Anakin's upper arm. "What can I do?" He was searching my eyes frantically. "Just give me a moment." I tried to reassure him it would pass, but that wouldn't be easy. I tried to push through the pain a little, just clear my mind and think pleasant thoughts. Soon enough it was over, it passed like a storm after the worst was over, and this time I remained conscious. "I-I'm fine now, Ani." I said, loosening the firm grip I held on his arm. "Are you sure? Maybe you should go lie down…" He touched my forehead, checking for any fever. "Anakin, I promise I'm really alright." A smile whispered over my lips, and I touched his arm. "If your sure." He touched my stomach longingly. It was curious to see him on his knees looking at the bulge in my belly like that. I mussed his hair a little. "I am." I smiled. He brought his eyes to my level, standing up half way. "I just want to be careful." He said, hugging me into his shoulder. When he managed to let go I pulled back.

"I would tell you if something was wrong." As soon as the words left my mouth I regretted them.

I only hoped he would not take it as an indication to the argument we had about the very same fact. "Would you?" His eyes were serious, shining blue stars. "What are you asking me? Of course I would. We have been through this before. I love you, trust you." I wanted to summarize my reasons before I needed to speak them all individually. His gaze hardened a fair amount, at a time that I would think it would soften. "You'll never leave?" It was as though the next moment he might be checking into whether of not I hated him. "Ani," I gasped, "Ani, what are you talking about?" It was a most absurd question. "Please just tell me…" He looked somehow childish, still on his knees, hair a bush from my playful gesture, begging of me that I tell him what he already knew. "Why do you need to hear it to know it's true? You know I love you. I'm carrying your child. Why would I leave you?" His eyes were now frantically searching me again, but searching more for an answer. "Please just say it." He held my hands in his own. It felt almost disgusting to be asked to proclaim that I was not going to leave. We'd had this argument before, as we had many others. "I am not going to tell you something you are already very aware of." My eyes conveyed my shock at him. "I just need to hear it, please, Padmé, for me…" I couldn't refuse the look on his face; the beauty even in his desperation was not lost on me. "I love you, Anakin. I'd never leave." My own voice sounding rasped and stretched, as though I were on the edge of tears. He cupped a hand over my cheek. "Thank you, Padmé." He Didn't really smile, but his face broke from the set frown it had on it. I wanted to ask why, wanted to help him. But I couldn't bring myself to do it then. "Your welcome." I said, looking disenchanted. He stared at my stomach for a moment before taking a seat in the chair in front of me. "I just needed to hear it from you." He spoke confidently, sure of himself, almost proud that I had given into saying what he wanted me to say. "Ani, do you hear yourself speaking?" I asked, trying now to find my voice. "You are asking me to promise to you things you already know, to promise things I had intended on doing already." His expression was pained. "But Padmé, don't you see?" He strained a choked laugh. "Intend as you might, me being here may not always be an option. I may have business, situations rarely stay the same for a-" He stopped. I knew what he was going to say. For a Jedi. "Thing's are always changing for everyone else too, Anakin. But I love you, and that should be enough." My voice was defined and very sure at the moment. I hardly disagreed with Ani on anything; I was almost in fear to sometimes.

"I just needed to know that would stay the same." He sounded so strange.

"What would make it change?" I challenged. Thoughts swirled inside his mind, I could see from his expression. That was the only question I truly wanted answered. "I don't know, Padmé, I just don't want to lose you." His eyes were burning stares into mine. "Ani, when have you ever come close to losing me? I am not going anywhere." I met his gaze with my own fire. "And I just needed to hear you say that." He explained as though it were that simple. "I don't understand. Don't you trust me?" I wasn't sure that he would answer this truthfully. "I want to trust you…" His reply shook me. A scowl appeared on my face. "That wasn't what I asked you, Anakin." I glared into his direction. "Yes, but-" I stopped him with an interjection of my own voice. "Ani, this is not based on terms and conditions and what you want. This is about me, you, our baby. This is about us, Anakin, don't you see that?" His expression was unemotional, and cold. "Maybe I do better than you." He stood and walked out of the room. Part of me wanted to chase after him, the other part wanted to cry. My own husband was a stranger, and with that the two weeks of happiness we shared was shattered. Gone were the moments I thought that this were over and that I had pushed doubt from my mind. Erased were the thoughts that we might just be able forget his changing personality for the benefit of our love. "I don't even know you." I hissed at no one, at the air. I clenched my fist, the anger rising. Tears won the better of me, however. I couldn't help but cry at the whirlwind of thoughts in my mind. They were so loud, so demanding at the moment. Even if I did know why Ani was acting so careless and cold, I could not help but think at the moment I would rather leave him to his own devices than help. Out of nowhere, I thought of the Jappor snippet. I remembered when Anakin had given it to me, so long ago. He was different then, however. He was a small boy, the most cherubic faced one I had ever known. Also, the most gifted child I had ever seen build or repair anything.

I walked into our room, though slightly deflated when I saw Anakin on our bed. I reached into a night side table where I kept a small red box. The box held the Jappor Snippet inside, safely tucked away. I removed it from the box, careful not to let the folds of paper make too much noise in the process. I placed it around my neck, a certain quality of peace settling over me. I almost wanted Anakin to see me and stop me, to tell me he was sorry and that things could be as they were. Deep inside I knew things could never be as they were, that things were always on a time that was never in our favor. I would never say that, though. Never admit it to myself. I exited the room as quickly as I had gone in, and as lonesome. I toyed with the Snippet, recalling happily the days before.

"Are you an angel?"

My eyes filled with tears I could not hold back. He was so innocent then, so free from the ghosts that haunted him now. Time had a way of changing people that at the moment made me want to cry out, it had changed him for the worse. I couldn't help but continue reminiscing over the Ani I once knew, the one I had a sinking feeling would forever be only in my memories. The way I'd seen him feel once, it was so beautiful. I remember the nervousness in him when he first confessed that he loved me, the way he trembled when I told him I returned that love. Granted that was some time later. Out of my memories protruded the first time I had ever seen Anakin act in such a way that shocked me, the first time before this all began.

"…and I slaughtered them like animals... I hate them!"

I shuddered at the image of Anakin killing anything. I wiped the tears from my eyes and stood up only to be met by Ani standing in the door way. I gasped a little and sniffled. Letting the Jappor Snippet fall through my fingers and onto my chest. I wondered if he would notice I was wearing it and see it as a sign. A sign of what, exactly, I wasn't sure. He passed me silently, regarding me with less than a glance. I passed into our room, and sat on the bed next to the warm indentation where he'd been sitting. I could feel him enter the room, hear his breathing. "Padmé listen to me…" He said, in less of a begging way and more of a statement. I didn't contest. "There's too much you don't understand…Too much I cannot explain. You will just have to trust me, Padmé." His voice was dark, and cold. My heart was heavy with the want to hear it more alive and humane. I said nothing, just held in tears, afraid of speaking for that they might spill out. "Will you trust me, Padmé?" He asked, still standing, facing my back. I could not look into his eyes, the burning fires that captivated me in a way that made me powerless. I managed little more than clearing my throat. I touched my stomach, and rested my hands there. "You do not trust me?" He asked, voice rising. "I do not know." I spoke flatly. "Padmé, please..." I could not face him, could not see the look on his face. I have to leave, but I'll be back shortly." He had closed the space between us, because now I could hear his breathing and feel his pressure leaning on the bed. Slight indications that he was saying goodbye to me before he left, without using those words. I didn't bother to ask where he was going; I'd just be met with silence. "Please be safe, Ani." I turned and stared at him, standing to brush my lips across his. There was a lack of emotion there, however. He tried to pull me in closer, but I edged away awkwardly. My round belly didn't help with that, though. He made a statement of understood with his eyes and hugged me tightly, stopping to touch my stomach before he departed. He stopped in the doorway. "I love you, Padmé." He didn't look at me. "I love you, Anakin." I spoke carefully, words becoming harder to form in my mouth.

It seemed as though time were doing terrible things to us all, but now in shorter time. I suppose we always knew we were on borrowed time, time that would run out and leave us gasping for air in a sea of confusion. All good things come to an end, and ours was looming ever closer in my mind. I had told him I would not give in to him, and I did. I sat, on a ship flying out to where I knew I would find Anakin, the man who had taken over my Ani. I had given in, though I said it would not work, to a lot of things.

Secret marriage, secret love, secret pregnancy.

(Author's Note: I know this next part if very sloppy on the whole Sith gaining control and the scene going on in the movie, but I really don't want to delve into that. Excuse me for it, please. Just assume she knows everything she is supposed to up until this point. This scene is the visit of Obi-Wan to bring her news of Ani! Thanks again!)

"Please come in.…" I beckoned Master Obi-Wan into my home. "It's refreshing to see you safe." I offered him a seat. He declined with a sorrow filled shake of the head. "Is Anakin here, Padmé?" His voice was heavy with hurt. "No, he hasn't been since yesterday. I have no idea where he is now." My face tensed with worry. "There are things going on with Anakin now, things I do not wish to tell you." He spoke forlornly. "Master Kenobi, I beg that you do.…" My eyes welled with tears at what he might say next. "I am afraid the Anakin we knew is no more. He has joined.…" His eyes grazed my own uncomfortably, "He has joined the Dark side." I stumbled backward in shock, and placed a hand on my stomach. I feared Obi-Wan already knew what was evident, that Anakin was the father. "You cannot be right, this cannot be true. What proof do you bring to me?" I said through tears that were falling. "I have seen things I will never forget, things that will forever haunt me about my former Padawan. I have seen him kill younglings." I broke into a steady stream of tears, balancing myself with one hand & holding my mouth with the other. "No, you're wrong, Master Obi-Wan. He wouldn't, couldn't.…." I began to sob, looking at my swollen belly. Our child grew there; our child that could've been like the younglings Anakin might've killed. "You're not telling the truth." My eyes rested heavy upon him. "I wish that were true. I need to find him, you must understand he is a threat, a great threat with the Jedi power he possess and the -" He did not finish. I knew what was going to happen, what the Jedi did to threats.

"Aggressive negotiations, negotiations with a light saber."

I almost laughed at remembering what Ani had told me so long ago. Sniffling slightly, I spoke to Obi-Wan. "I do not wish to hear more, Master Kenobi. I cannot assist you in finding him, I have no idea where he has gone. Please, if you'll be so kind as to excuse me." I motioned to the door with a very blank stare. He did leave, but not before giving me his most sincere apologies. I had more confusion in me than before, mixed with tears, and pain, hate, and love.

It was around sunset when I boarded my ship, I had to find him, to see for myself if this great tale that Master Kenobi was spinning was the truth. Threepio was there with me, though I did regard him very carefully at the moment. There was no possibility that was Obi-Wan was saying could be the truth, he had to be wrong. But deep inside I had my doubts that he was wrong, I had noticed a change in Ani too great to ignore. But this change was not as radical as turning to the Dark side. Jedi do not just convert to that, it just had to be a change over a period of time. But I knew Anakin better than this, he had always wanted to be a Jedi, he would not do the unspeakable things Obi-Wan had described to me, there was no way he was capable of slaughtering younglings. My mind thought back to the Sand-people. I pushed it out, that was different, I said to myself. Though in my heart of hearts I did not know how.

My ship landed down beside Anakin's on Mustafar. Just to see his face again, alive, brought joy to my heart. I ran into his arms. "Ani!" I smiled broadly. He kissed me and pulled back. "I have heard unspeakable things, Anakin, Master Kenobi has told me you did very disturbing things." I had a sour look on my face, and he brushed a lock of hair out of my eyes. His expression hardened. "Tell me, Padmé, tell me what they've tried to poison you with!" He seemed angry, fire in his voice. "Just terrible…they said.…" I choked back tears at even mentioning the possibility. "They said you killed mere children." His eyes were on fire now, burning. "They are trying to poison you!" He shouted, as though I had confirmed it. "He wants to help you, he knows this is your child…" I pulled closer to him as though I were still whispering a secret. "How can that be?" He said, lowering his tone. "I-I was in a grip of something, Ani, please believe me that I did not confirm it purposefully." I said, staring into his eyes. He nodded as though he understood. "Do not listen to him, ignore whatever lies he tries to have you hear." He warned, pointing a finger. "But, Ani, he cares about you and our child as well.…" I said, to no avail. He shook his head vehemently. "No, Padmé, don't you see? He is powerless against me, against us. He cannot save your life the way I can now. I have been doing this, all of this, for you…" It was as though he were trying to convince himself. "Anakin, don't do this for me! I told you once before I do not mean to let you give up your future for me, and I still mean to abide by that. Let's go, before it's too late, Ani. Please…" I begged.
"There is no limit to what we can do now, my Love!" He laughed a little. "We could rule everything as we see it before us, and change things to be the way we see fit to be changed! The possibility of our power is endless." He spoke with conviction, and thirst in his voice. I shook my head and backed away from him. "No, Ani, Please. It cannot be that way. This cannot be who you are, I am losing you.…" He looked at me with glaring eyes. "Never! You will never lose me nor I you!" He shouted. "Anakin, I have lost who I knew before…who I fell in love with. My heart is breaking knowing that I cannot stop loving you, but I cannot follow where you are leading. It is You who is breaking my heart, Ani!" Tears streamed on my face. "No! This is a better way, a way you & I can be forever!" He said, inching closer to me. "Anakin, please...Stop this now, while you are able to. The damage is done, but please for the sake of our child and my own life, do not do anymore." He shook his head again. "I have damaged nothing but lies and deceit plagued on us for years by the Jedi and republic! If you love me, please join me, come with me…" I could not breathe for tears, I could not believe the words I was hearing from Anakin's mouth. "Anakin, you know I love you more than anything, that's why you must stop." I pleaded with him, countering his moving towards me with stepping back slightly. "I am the all-powerful person I told you I would be, that I promised you I would be. Now, join me Padmé, do not betray me." I choked on my tears. "No!" I cried hoarsely.

"I love you but I could never do as you want me to do.…I love you.…" I said, covering my mouth.

"You have lied to me again!" He yelled, pointing behind of me. I turned and saw Obi-Wan in the door of my ship. "I don't understand!" I screamed. "You have lied! You have plotted my death with him and you are here to carry it out! Well, it will not be that way.…" His eyes burned into my soul, ferocity the likes I never saw in him. His mouth was in a growl, his hair tousled and messy. The stance of the man before me was not that of Ani. It was in that moment I realized how long ago Ani had died. He was gone long before this, and I saw that fact blazing in the eyes of the man standing before me. "Ani I would never hurt you!" I screamed. "Do not speak!" He shouted, holding his hand out. I felt the breathing in my throat get tighter and tighter as I clawed at my neck. Please Ani I love you I kept trying desperately to scream .I was lifted off the ground, pregnant belly hanging in the air. I pleaded silently with him that if not for me for his baby, don't suffocate me. He moved his hand tighter in the air and blackness surrounded me, circling in on all I could see. All I could see were the burning eyes of the man I had loved, the man who would've fathered my baby, the man who was choking the air out of my lungs though he knew my heart beat only for him.

"You have life in you Padmé, don't let it slip away." I could see Obi-Wan holding my hand as I lay on the table. I struggled not to cry, my body was in such pain. My heart was in more so. I knew now the man I loved was gone long ago, but now Anakin was gone as well. "It's a girl…" a medical droid buzzed in my ear. "L-Leia." I spoke faintly; my voice seemed under pressure of pain. "And a Boy." It said afterwards. "Luke, his name is Luke." I reached for his hand as I took hers as well. I could feel it inside that I was growing fainter, and I knew that things were not going to have a happy ending this time, things would have to be better for Luke and Leia, but things for me were not going to end with the love I had once. "Stay with us, Padmé. You have much life still ahead of you." Obi-Wan begged me. "It hurts.…" I bit my lip in pain. "I know things could've been different, but they are not. I still love him, Master Kenobi. I still know Ani is in there somewhere.…" I studied the Jappor Snippet in my hands.
"I am sorry, Ani…sorry things ended like this.…"