A/N: Warning to everyone! Erik gets really dark in this chapter, well for a while. Poor Christine, and poor Erik too.
When I awoke, Erik was staring at me, watching me. His fingers tracing my neck lovingly. "Christine, I love you," he sang it as if it were part of a song. I smiled faintly, but my dream still haunted me. How could the past die if it stayed with me in my dreams. He kissed my lips lightly, just a small sign of affection. I smiled against his lips. When I was with him, I lost all track of time. I did not care if it was day or night. I slept when he was beside me, nothing else mattered suddenly. The only thing that meant anything was how long our next kiss would last. I hoped the feeling of quiet never left me.
"I never thought you could love me," he whispered in my ear, his hot breath causing shivers along my spine. "I thought more than anything you would hate me after all that happened between us," I turned my back to him. "But now I know," he placed a few hot kisses along my shoulderblades, tracing the bone of my spine with his index finger. More kisses reigned on the nape of neck. Than slowly made their way down to my clavicles. My arms reached behind me to take his hands, and pulled him directly against me. It was apparent what being next to me did to him, I gasped as he leaned harder against me. He chuckled at my small, quick breaths. Slowly he lowered his head to taste the flesh of my shoulder again, I held his hands close around my abdomen and as he drew his tongue across the flesh, I squeezed his fingers in mine. The very movement caused such an arousal that he bit down only enough for pain to shoot lightly into me. I sucked in breath through clenched teeth.
"Erik, please, can we just.." I didn't finish my sentence as he tucked his head onto my own and inhaled the scent of my hair.
"Being near you is intoxicating," he murmured and indeed he sounded as if he were intoxicated, " Why, mon ange, you are trembling," he exclaimed feeling the sobs that were beginning to wrack my body.
"Just a dream," I sobbed, as his fingers wiped away the tears. " A nightmare," He held me close all of the passion and arousal gone now, he just wanted me to feel safe. "I'm so sorry," I continued not really sure what I was babbling. He was whispering words into my ear, "I called you a monster before, how could I ever think something so wrong?" I hated to be so weak especially in front of Erik, but he just continued his comforting words.
"Everything will be alright," he croaned, "Once we are away from this place, the nightmares will end," I sniffled wanting to believe in what he was telling me. I felt terrible for having ruined a wonderful mment. When I had stopped crying, he held me still, in front of him. His hands tracing my stomach and than upward, not going so far as my breasts. After the last sob fell from my lips, he drew his hands up, cupping my breasts, as his thumbs traced them.
"Erik," I whimpered lightly at the contrast of his skin and my own, "I would very much like to see Raoul once more, just to let him know I am alright," I cursed myself for ever letting those words pass my lips. For as soon as they did his hands became rough and his fingernails bit into my tender flesh. I made another pitiful sound in my throat and attempted to break from his tight embrace, yet another mistake on my part.
My body hardly was hardly able to move even a bit, he was much stronger than I was. "Remember, I love you, Erik? I suppose all good things come to and end though, do they not? You think you can come when you desire a bit more than De Chagny is able to give you, and than you can return to him when you feel you have had enough?" His voice was cold, hurt, I knew that trying to explain to him would do no good. "The world, my world, does not allow that, Christine! You are trying to make a fool of me? I will not have that!" His hands were continuing to trace my skin until it was at the point of acheing. " You came here for me! You will never leave! You will remain with me, I shall take you away from France by force, somewhere that Vicomte cannot find you, I will never allow you outdoors if that is what is required! You belong to me!"
His fingers drew lower and lower until they stopped between my thighs. I cried out again as he pressed his fingers against me. After a moment he withdrew them and rolled me over until I was staring into his eyes. He put a knee between mine and his arms on either side of me. With a determined frown he pressed his lips to mine. I fought for a moment, pushing at his chest. I didn't want things to happen like this! This could ruin everything we had established! I tried to scream at him but the sound was stuck in my throat, my finger clawed and shoved. Finally he took both wrists in one of his hands and pushing them above my head.
"Erik! Stop you are hurting me!" that sentence drowned out all my other cries as he pressed his lips to my chest, stopping at the words.
"Am I? You have hurt me countless times already, Christine! I am a horrible monster, remember? Cold, uncaring, uncompassionate? Now you are going to feel just a bit of the pain you are causing in me!" His face frightened me and I sobbed, feeling my chest rise and fall with ragged breaths. " I am going to show you what it is like to cry with pain as no one listens, to have your pleas ignored, to ache as I ache!" He lowed his mouth to my breast, after sucking at it for just a moment, his teeth grazed across it. I made a sound like a muffled scream, but he didn't listen.
" Please, just stop this!" I begged on and on as he continued, finally moving from one side of my chest to the next, giving it equal attention and pain. I knew that I was crying again, this time from anger and hurt. He knew he didn't have to do this to me, I would give him all he wanted of me, he had no need to take it as he was doing. "Erik!" I screeched again as he bit down harder than before. His right hand fell to my hips, pressing there hard. He held my body in place as he continued to ravish it. I tried to move about wildly and only succeeded in his forcing me down to the bed and holding me tighter below him.
" I love you, Erik!" I tried, my one last tactic, surely he would stop if he heard those words. Instead he forced a fierce kiss to my mouth and looked at me. I was taken aback by his flaming eyes. My lips were numb from the pressure he was exerting onto them. I cried against his face, waiting for him to stop kissing me long enough for me to talk. When he moved up toward my ear lobe I repeated my previous words.
" Stop that!" He growled, pressing his lips back to mine to silence me. Still I called the same promises again and again, "Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!" He screamed pushing himself into me. I, at last, said nothing else. I tried to remain silent as he pushed himself fully into me, but I gave a small cry. He began to move, slowly inside of me, my moans didn't stop now. They had become continuous and rapid, mingled with small gasps. It had not been like this the first two times we did anything. He had been ever so careful not to hurt me. Now he was drawing himself in and out, growing faster and deeper with each thrust. He lowered his lips back to my breast as he never ceased his rhythm. His own breathing was shallow. Finally I felt myself consumed with fire, my throat formed one more desperate cry. Erik too released as he gave a long, low moan. "Erik," I whimpered again and again as he moved beside me, still clutching my wrists. When he let go of them, I knew that they would be bruised from his grip in the throws of passion.
I drew my knees up to my chest, refusing to say anything to him at all. I lowered my head and began to cry. This was my fault, why had I mentioned Raoul? I knew that Erik was not confident in the fact that I loved him, and I had caused him pain again. I continued to hold myself like that, expecting my love to at any moment, feel pity and remorse for what he had done to me. Instead he stood up leaning down to kiss me on the cheek, and than dressed. I could hear him moving around the room, as I lay there and sobbed. He said nothing to me, not a word, and shut the door of the room quietly behind him as he went.
" What am I doing?" I heard Erik ask himself as he leaned against the door. He seemed to be crying deeply, I felt even worse knowing that he was angry with himself. I wanted to get up and convince him it was my fault, but every muscle in my body was aching and I could not sleep to calm the pain. I could still feel his touches on my body, raking the skin. I brought my hand to my breast tenderly testing the flesh there to see if it was alright. It was damp from his tongue's constant prodding, and it sent a shiver through me, but I would be alright. It was mostly the shock, the pain between my legs. He had meant it when he said he was going to show me pain. He had not been gentle with me. He had not used the slow, rocking motion we had before, but this time it had been a hard, fast, and yet slow. Each movement driving deeper and deeper inside of me, until I felt he had reached the very core of my being.
Maybe I would have been better going off with Raoul...I shook that traitorous thought from my mind. My stomach ached, my body pained me, still I would stay with Erik, I would stick beside him through everything. I had no choice did I?
