Chapter Twenty Two

"You ran out of your first period class?" raged Mom, later that day.

"I was provoked!" I insisted.

"By what, a broken nail? And you skipped the rest of the day? What the hell were you doing?" she demanded.

"Making out with my boyfriend!" I countered.

"You know Calista Jagielski, your father and I have always tried to let you guys lead your own lives, but making out with someone to get back at someone who loves you is one of the lowest things I've ever seen you do," she said with forced calm.

"Like you're one to talk!"

It was one of the first times in years I'd expected Mom to slap me, on of the first times in years I'd deserve it.

"It's a different case. And I admit that it was the stupidest thing I've ever done, but you have yet to admit how in love you are!"

"I'm not!"

"You are! It's been obvious! For like three years now! Just face it for once!" she stated.

"I don't have to be with Sawyer. Just because we're best friends, doesn't mean we're soul mates. And I'm freakin' tired of everyone thinking we are," I said, storming out to the car.

The house I pulled up at was large and imposing, made primarily of dark stone and much larger than our own mansion.

I didn't have the courage to enter it without knocking, so I rang the bell. A maid answered. Seriously, a maid.

"Hi, I'm looking for John Fenning?" I said awkwardly.

"And you are, Miss?" she asked.

"Um, his girlfriend, Callie Jagielski," I explained. She nodded, and led me inside before leaving to find John.

Five minutes later we fell onto his bed, kissing and biting fiercely. He shed his shirt and helped me off mine, and his lips traveled across my uncovered body. I forced my hands to feign interest, to roam across his.

His pants were already off. He was coming closer, my body was preparing for him. Then:

"I can't do this," I whispered, backing up against the headboard. The silence split and we rebounded back into the real world.

"Ah."

"I'm sorry John. It just wouldn't be fair to you," I said.

"Because?"

"Because I'd be using you," I admitted.

"Because you're in love with Sawyer Scott?" he asked. His found his pants and pulled them back on.

"I don't know, John. But I'm mad at him, and this would kill him. I think you're a really good guy," I said helpfully.

"Thanks. But you know if Sawyer's right for you, you need to let him know," he said.

"It's too late."

"It isn't-I was watching you in class today, the guy's crazy over you. All you need to do is reach out to him, say yes instead of no and he'll be there like a shot," he said assuredly.

"I've been a bitch lately," I admitted.

"Come on, it's part of your charm," he said. He didn't object when I palishly slapped his head.

"I don't even know what I feel about him. I mean we kissed and it was perfect, but I've never been in a real relationship. And I don't think he has, either, so how can we figure it out? And what happens to our best friend days?"

"Cal, I hate to say this but your friendship, as it had been, has been over for months-probably since the time you slept in his bed," he said.

"I told you about that?" I asked in confusion. He nodded and laughed.

"Yeah, you talked about him a lot-doesn't do much for a guy's ego, let me tell you. But you're never going back to the days of the BFF, so you might as well go forward into something else," he said encouragingly.

"But it won't last forever, and I won't lose him," I said stubbornly.

"Weren't both your parents married before nineteen?" he said.

"Yeah-his at sixteen, but they separated for a year. Mine at eighteen, but my Mom made out with her ex-boyfriend a few times."

"Sure, but they're still together. They went through shit, but they came out okay," he said.

"You do realize you're saying these things to your ex-girlfriend?" I asked. He laughed again, and I laughed with him.

"Yeah, but you know, sometimes people stay friends, even after they break up," he said. I giggled and hugged him before leaving.

I'd semi-made up with my mother and avoided being grounded when Sawyer Scott arrived at the door.

"Come on, we're going out," he said when I answered.

"Uh, no we're not," I objected.

"Callie."

"Sawyer."

"Squirt."

"BJ."

"Okay, a tiny bit too cute. Now come on, grab some running shoes," he said. I groaned and did what he said, not bothering to object when he took my elbow and lead me to his car.

We ended up at the park. I gazed at it-I hadn't visited in years, but it was the start of all things in many ways. Before we could even talk and walk, our parents had taken us here to play in the sandbox and the swings, alternately talking with each other and even briefly moaning about pregnancies. I looked sideways at him and smiled.

"Be I can still beat you on the jump," he challenged. I shook my head.

"Nu-uh. Never," I said.

"Prove it," he challenged, getting out of the car. I followed him to the swings, where we began to pump our legs quickly to pick up speed.

We counted down from three before launching off the swings as late as possible, from the greatest distance. We flew briefly through the air before landing hard on the sand, tangled up with each other.

"Kicked your ass," he said. I giggled-my head was about level with his waist.

"Well, not my fault you're twelve inches taller than me," I said stubbornly.

"Or eleven, or something. Jenny used to be the best at that," he said reminiscently. I remembered how the five of us had made contests of it-Jenny would always win, after they'd all grown taller than me I'd always lose.

"Yeah, she was fearless," I said. I looked sideways at him in suspicion.

"Yeah, damn good faller. What next?" he said. I noticed a tree next to the playground, and memories flooded forth again-a hiding place, a home base, a secret home.

"Come on," I said. He got up before me, and helped me up. I kept his hand to lead him to the tree. I nimbly hoisted myself up to the lower branches and adroitly climbed up several more feet. I looked down at him awkwardly climbing to the branches I'd just left, and climbed until I'd reached the uppermost branches.

It was several more minutes before he reached me an perched precariously on the branch beside me. He was out of breath.

"That's practically suicide. I'll definitely give you that victory," he said gallantly.

"Gained? I earned it, BJ. You just aren't quick enough on your feet," I said. The tension that had been wrapped around us for days began to fade.

"Yeah, that's what my basketball coach says," he said.

"Well after all, he is your dad," I said.

"But he's unbiased."

"I ran into your grandfather," I said suddenly.

"Poor thing. I don't think I've even ever met him," he said thoughtfully.

"He was really mean, and he kept insinuating that me, Mom and Haley were all sluts. Quite pleasant," I said. He threw back his head to laugh.

"Yeah, he'll do that," he said. I peered through the leafy branches-the sun had begun to set, and we had the best view in the playground.

"We used to do this all the time," I said suddenly.

"Yeah, back before the training wheels got off our bikes," he said.

"More recently than that!" I protested.

"Fine, later," he said. I nodded in satisfaction.

My eyes widened in alarm and then fluttered close as his lips approached, breaking the casual, friendly moment. I leaned backwards on the branch, and he held me to steady me.

"Don't. Don't touch me," I begged.

"Callie, we have to stop doing this," he said.

"Yeah, we do! So stop trying!" I said. I scrambled down the branches, ignoring him when he reached the ground first and tried to hold out his arms to catch me.

"We both want this. Everyone knows it's inevitable," he said when we were both on the ground.

"Well, I've never been a big believer in fate," I said coolly.