Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars or related concepts. The only things I own are things/people/aliens you don't recognize, unless otherwise stated in a disclaimer.
A/N: Thank you, reviewers, your reviews mean a lot to me. This is my first Star Wars fic, so please do not be too harsh in your reviews, however, constructive criticism is greatly appreciated. Flames will be used to torch Lakeville South High School, for Cougars suck and Lakeville North High School's Panthers rule!
Chapter Four
I woke up just a few minutes before pulling out of light-speed. My dream, like usual, drifted out of my mind before I was able to comprehend what info it contained. As I dropped out of hyperspace, I switched the controls over to manual, and begin an orbit around Tatooine.
Through my ship's sensors I found a small home just outside a city and next to a large clear wasteland. I aimed for the clearing, coming in carefully and casually so I did not draw attention to myself. I got out of the ship and surveyed my surroundings.
All that was seen was sand. And rock. Nothing else. Large dunes covered the area, encasing it to look like a sinkhole. An ominous feel came from the planet I stood on.
Reaching into my bag, I hooked the lightsaber onto my belt, feeling that I would need it. As I walked on, sure to leave tracks so I could find my way back, I began to be surer of one thing.
I was not alone.
Hand ready to grab my lightsaber if necessary, I turned around to see if anyone was there. I could feel another presence. I could tell there was someone there.
"Come out, whoever you are!" I called out.
"Luke?" A voice replied.
I jerked my head toward the voice. An older man, with graying blond hair and blue eyes, somewhat of a stereotype of the Jedi, (which he most certainly was as he was wearing Jedi robes,) walked out from the shadow of the largest dune.
"Excuse me?" I asked.
"No, you couldn't be him. You're much too old…" He thought out loud. "But you are familiar."
"I've never been here before, how could I know you?" I asked.
"We could have met on Coruscant. I used to live there until… Well, about the time the Empire sprung about."
"You're a Jedi, aren't you?"
His eyes darted toward my lightsaber. "Perhaps. What is your name, friend?"
"Blaise. Blaise Arrando."
"My name is Ben Kenobi. Welcome to Tatooine."
"I have a feeling I'm not staying too long," I said coolly. "The Empire is after me. They think I'm a Jedi."
"They may be right… You do have a lightsaber."
"They are right. As far as I know, anyway," I muttered.
"What do you mean by that?"
"I have no memory beyond three years ago. The only things I own from before that are this…" I gestured toward my lightsaber, "… and a set of Jedi robes."
"Strange. Three years ago is when I left Coruscant."
"I was driven out of Coruscant last night. Imperial fighters attempted to kill me twice."
"Maybe you can remember me by another name: Jedi Master Obi-wan Kenobi."
A flash of memory was stirred by his name.
"…You were on the Council."
"Yes."
"Who is Luke?" I asked, remembering what he had called me.
Obi-wan hesitated. "Someone I know."
I felt his unease about the topic, so I shifted to something else.
"So... you survived the Empire's purge of all the Jedi?"
"...Only barely."
I could already tell that it was another sensitive topic for him. "Maybe you can help me. Like I said, I lost the majority of my memory a few years back, and therefore all my training as well. I don't think a rough idea of how to use a lightsaber is going to help me any against the Imperial troops, should I ever see any again."
"Maybe I could," Obi-wan said thoughtfully. "Come with me."
Of course, I followed.
The Jedi's house was simple, but that was to be expected of a person in hiding. There was not much room inside, but from what I had seen of the planet, it didn't need to be.
Obi-wan, or 'Ben' as he asked me to call him, sat at the small table in the furthest corner of the door. He motioned for me to sit next to him, and I obliged.
"So, 'Blaise,' was it?" I nodded in response. "I assume it's not your real name?"
"No, it isn't. It's the name my adoptive mother gave me when she found me."
"I see. What all have you learned about your past?"
"I looked at a couple security recordings in the Jedi Temple, and I found a recording of me and another Jedi dueling with our lightsabers."
Ben looked solemn. "I remember that recording. The 'Jedi' you dueled is a Sith Lord called Darth Vader."
"Isn't he like the Emperor's second-in-command, or something like that?" I inquired.
"Unfortunately, yes. You must be good at handling a lightsaber to match him."
"I wouldn't know. All I ever remember doing with this is cutting a hole in a locked door to get out of a collapsing building. If you couldn't guess, I'm not exactly too knowledgeable about the whole swordfight bit," I explained.
"So basically what you're saying is you want training. There, I can most likely help you," Ben explained, "but you need to be patient and open-minded in order to successfully master the lightsaber." He laughed. "Perhaps this may be a way to remember things you've long forgotten."
"I wish..."
I returned to my ship for the night, noticing that Ben's house wasn't exactly built to have visitors. Then again, the fighter wasn't built for a comfortable night's sleep, either, but it worked better than being on the floor in a small hut.
Ben had walked me back, as night had quickly fallen and he was wary of the 'sand people' who inhabited this region. It was probably a necessary precaution, too, as I didn't own a blaster and was still a bit shaky with a lightsaber, considering the fact that I had just learned how to activate it earlier the same day.
I had a feeling that these next few months would be rather hectic. Between completing my fighter, trying to get my memory back, learning about a new environment, and training with Ben, I wasn't going to have much time to relax. Which was probably a good thing. It would keep my senses sharp and alert.
I locked the controls in my fighter so that when I slept I couldn't bump anything, leaned back, and went to sleep.
Master Oorla and I are standing in the Jedi Council room, being briefed about our next assignment; a trip to a planet generally overlooked by most everyone called Olani. There were rumors that Count Dooku and General Grievous were meeting there with the Separatist leaders. I had heard the actual rumor and couldn't sense if they were true or not, but apparently the council has an idea of their validity.
"At Olani, danger you will face. If there, Dooku and Grievous are, confront them you must," Master Yoda says.
"Master Yoda, what of my apprentice? I do not believe he is ready for such a battle, if need be," Master Oorla asks. I stare at him, confused. Why am I not ready?
"The council feels that Tobias is ready," a holographic Ki-Adi-Mundi replies. "He will be able to help in this mission."
I feel somewhat confused. They are talking about me as if I am not even here. What am I doing to deserve this? I have fought in this war, I have defended others.
"Until you are on the council, you must respect our judgment, Master Oorla," Master Windu comments. He might as well have said that Master Oorla's chances of being selected for the council are miniscule, perhaps even nonexistent.
Oorla sighs. We bow and leave the council chambers.
"Master, why don't you think I am ready?" I ask as soon as we are in the hallway. "I can fight, I have fought, probably in battles much harder than this!"
"That is why. You are much too overconfident. Count Dooku is not a standard battle droid, nor a starship to be destroyed. Neither is General Grievous,'' Oorla says. "A battle against either is much more difficult than any other battle you have faced."
"The council thinks I am ready. Why do you argue?"
"...We need to get going."
"You're dodging the question."
"I said, we need to get going."
I sigh. "Yes, Master."
The intensity of the sunlight woke me, and I had to shield my eyes as I walked toward Ben's little shack. At that point, nothing was processing in my mind. If something was, I'd probably have wondered why I still remembered my dream...
"So, why hasn't it occurred to most Jedi to use their power for themselves?"
"In most cases, Force-sensitive children are taken from their homes at a young age to the temple so they do not learn of such power," Ben explained. "There were only a few special occasions that happened differently."
"What happened to them?" I asked. I could feel it was another sensitive subject, but I needed to know.
"Several left the Jedi Order. Another became Darth Vader."
"The one I fought." He nodded. "What's his story?"
I was treading in waters infested with dianogas, I could feel it. But, after a considerable silence, he finally spoke.
"His name was Anakin Skywalker. He was on the council by the request of the Supreme Chancellor, though he did not gain the rank of Jedi Master. Anakin was infuriated. He turned to Palpatine for comfort and encouragement, rather than his master. Palpatine was a Sith lord.
"Anakin was corrupted by Palpatine and blinded by his love for a senator, Padmé Amidala of Naboo. He and the soon-to-be Emperor destroyed the Jedi, and the Clone Wars were finished. Anakin betrayed his master, and they dueled on Mustafar. His master won, and Anakin was horribly injured. He became Darth Vader when he discovered that his wife, Padmé, had died of a broken heart."
Though I was somewhat hesitant, I needed to know one more thing.
"Who was his master?"
"...Obi-wan Kenobi."
"You were his master?"
"He was my first and last Padawan. Jedi Master Yoda and I are the only Jedi, apart from you, who we know survived. His story is an ironic dilemma."
"What's so ironic about it?" I asked.
"Anakin had been having dreams; visions, really. About Padmé dying in childbirth. He was trying to find a way to save her. The Emperor used this, and told him that only the Sith could stop death. He became a Sith to save her, but by becoming a Sith he killed her. She lost the will to live after realizing what he had done."
"You're right. Quite ironic. But I believe his punishment is suitable, though there is no way to bring back all the lives he has taken. Having to live knowing all the people you love have died, knowing you killed them, knowing that you only wanted to help, knowing that you were selfish about everything, is really difficult."
Ben raised an eyebrow. "How do you know this?"
"My mom was killed when I fled from Coruscant. And it's my fault. Because I was a Jedi. Because I only wanted to know who I was. Because I only wanted to remember. I wanted so much, yet gave so little…"
"It is not your fault that the Emperor does not like Jedi. And that is the only reason he wanted to kill you."
"But if I hadn't gone to the temple, he wouldn't have known who I was. It is my fault," I pushed.
"A Jedi has no fault over what happens, if it is the will of the Force."
"What if it wasn't?" I counter. "How do you know what the will of the Force is? Does the Force just walk up to you and say 'Hello, I want your mom dead,' or what?"
"We mourn the dead, but we do not dwell on it. Death is a part of life, Blaise."
"Why does it have to be?"
"…You're being a hypocrite."
"What's so hypocritical?"
"You say that Anakin is being punished knowing that his wife is dead thanks to his selfishness, and you are being hypocritical because you are being selfish and wanting your mother back."
I was silent.
"I can't train you if you can't accept death. It is sad that your mother died, but you cannot revolve your life around it," He said carefully. "I want to help you. But I can't unless you help yourself."
"Well, maybe I don't want to help myself," I snapped, walking out of the house.
I sat in the sand, leaning against my fighter, staring at the two suns setting. It was way too warm for me on this planet, but even after the argument I had with Ben, I couldn't bring myself to jump into my fighter and leave.
I sighed. And then it occurred to me that I hadn't forgotten the previous night's dream. I scanned my memories, searching for something, anything that had the possibility of being useful—
Tobias. The Jedi Master had called me Tobias. I had a name, a real name that I had been given by my real mother. No longer was I Blaise; no longer was I a name that had no true meaning for me.
I am Tobias.
I rested my eyes, calming down from the conflict with Ben.
Speaking of which…
"No need to sneak up on me," I said. "I can sense you."
"I expected at least that much," Ben said, walking up behind me. "Actually, I expected you to be halfway across the galaxy at this point."
"So did I. I guess I just needed to cool down a bit."
"I suppose so." He eyed me curiously. "There's something on your mind."
"It's nothing."
"Tell me."
I sighed. "I just remembered something. Beyond three years ago, I mean."
"A dream?"
Nodding, I replied, "My name. In a dream I had last night, someone referred to me by name: Tobias."
"Hm. Now I remember where I've seen you before. You were at the temple with… Master Oorla, I believe. Good man, powerful Jedi. Quite funny, if I remember correctly. He died near the end of the Clone Wars."
I heard a bellowing noise. "What was that?"
He listened. "A Bantha. Tusken Raiders are about."
"I have a bad feeling about this."
"As do I, Tobias. As do I…
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Innes: Socks! Just what I needed! (okay, now I've probably freaked you out enough...)
