A/N: Thanks to Quickjewel for reviewing! I will note to put lots and lots of '&'s this time round just so I can annoy you! Just Kidding! I will try to abstain from using too many '&'s. I'll also dedicate this one to you! (That is, if you bother to read this again) Double thanks to those of my classmates who reviewed, you know who you are! This time round I promise this one's going to be REALLY interesting because this chapter wasn't part of my homework for the guild. Now, on with the show!

It was dinnertime. The Great Hall as usual was swarming with hungry students waiting to be fed. You gulp as you sit down at the Gryffindor table. Oh my, the food sure looks tempting! Roast pork, prime beef; chocolate truffles… But you aren't going to risk your neck just because Snape said that he was going to dribble that love potion over the pumpkin juice, oh no you aren't. Besides, that slimy old snake could have put it in the food and you wouldn't even taste the difference, Snape had a knack for catching students unaware.

'Come on, Harry! The food tastes great, don't you want some?' your friend, Ron Weasely teased, scooping a lump full of jelly and holding it tantalisingly under your nose.

As the smell wafted towards you, your tummy chose that inappropriate moment to growl. You sigh, resigned to another night's fate of an empty stomach. Perhaps you should take a leaf out of Professor Moody's book and start eating your meals out of a flask…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough."

- Terra, 10 years old.

Potions Lesson No. 3 – The trouble with Love…

'Hurry up, Harry!' called Ron over his shoulder, hopping on the balls of his feet and looking terribly excited. Next up was Double Potions, the one class you'd been dreading all morning. But Ron seemed excited, funny, even anticipating for it… You decided that you'd better keep an eye on him, you don't know what else your ever-surprising friend could be up to.

'50 points from Gryffindor, Potter!' roared Snape from the teacher's desk. You raised an eyebrow questioningly, not daring to look like you've been done some injustice.

'That's for starving yourself, Mr. Potter. As everyone knows, you're quite wimpy enough without having to go on a diet,' Snape snickered, wagging a finger at you casually as one would to a naughty child, 'Now, don't give me that look, Potter. I'm only having your 'welfare at heart'.'

The class gasped at this announcement. They've been tricked! Everyone stared at each other, not quite knowing how to respond. Well almost everyone, except some who were looking glassy eyed and Ron who was radiating a most maniacal smile. And Hermione Granger, your other best friend was gazing most intently at Trevor the toad, sighing and fawning over him. Draco Malfoy was positively salivating at his own reflection while peering into a mirror and combing his beautiful locks, while Seamus Finnigan was er – fanning his eyelashes in your direction. You have a nudging feeling that Snape didn't exactly play by the rules of opposite sex when it came to you.

'I have completed testing your love potions and I have never seen such incompetence! Tut, tut, tut…' though he couldn't quite hide a smug grin, 'All except for Mr. Malfoy here. Good job Mr. Malfoy, straight A. YOU Longbottom, got a D! You're a disgrace to the wizarding world! I presume you put in your toad's wart instead of your own? Hmm?'

'Mr. Potter your potion, was surprisingly most effective. Although TOO effective in fact, so anyhow you got a D,' Snape rattled on and waved this development impatiently aside, 'Miss Granger got a B, Miss Parkinson got a B – even though it was as good as Mr. Malfoy's. Take that! That's for sending it to me on the guise of my morning coffee! Mr. Finnigan got a D because Potter here suddenly decided he likes to eat worms, oh well TOO BAD! And Weasely fails because he's too poor.'

'Now, all of you might be wondering how I managed to force-feed you the potions. Oh no, you didn't think I could possibly be such an idiot as to pour it in your pumpkin juice did you? It was in the chocolate truffles my dearies! What a genius I am! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!'

You shake your head - pure evil, this man. You turn to Ron, who was giggling and grinning ever more broadly, 'Let's see who's laughing when it's crunch time!'

YUCK!!! Trevor the toad had jumped onto your face and somehow secreted slime through his glands. Hermione was now pawing your face, muttering, 'His slime! His beautiful gorgeous slime!'

'Err…Hermione geroff me! Look, if you gave Trevor a kiss, I'm sure he'll turn into a prince.'

'Really? Thanks, Harry!' and off she went, hunting for Trevor.

You had barely returned her with a, 'No problem!' when the dungeon door swung open on its hinges abruptly and revealed an astonishing sight – (drum-roll please)

'Sevviekins darling! Sweetie, come to mama!' Professor McGonagall was dressed in the most ludicrous revealing tartan negligee topped with a green furry shawl (A/N: Is it called shawl? You know the furry material that drag queens have round their shoulders.) draped around her shoulders. She was posing seductively at the doorway, one hand on hips and the other twirling her hair playfully. Indeed, she was one hot chilli mama!

Ron, on the other hand, was in hysterics, practically hyperventilating. This was when you got it! Someone had somehow fed Professor McGonagall with a love potion that has Snape's DNA in it! No wonder Ron had been so eager! No doubt, his brothers had a part to play in this!

Professor McGonagall rushed towards Snape and pounced onto him from behind, giving him an even harder squeeze.

'ACCCKKKKK!!!' cried Snape, choking from the strain, arms flailing wildly, 'Get off me Minerva, you witch!' he yelled to no avail.

'Oh Severus! What shall we do first? I know there's this really fabulous concert put up by the Weird Sisters! Or shall we have a romantic candlelight dinner by the fireplace? Or do you want to get it on first? * giggle *'

'No, I certainly don't want to get it on with you of all people! No seriously, Minerva, stop unbuttoning my robes! Aarrrgggghhhh!!!! Stop it! It's embarrassing! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'

Snape's hands clawed the doorframe in a last minute attempt to disengage himself from Professor McGonagall as she dragged him away, 'You'll get it Weasely, you and your filthy friend!!!!' Unfortunately, as predicted, it didn't work.

'CLASS – ARRGH! D-DISMISSED!!!'

A/N: The quote from Terra who is 10 years old is from lovequote.com.

He! He! J I thought I might try something different this time! So there you go, tell me what you think of this story by reviewing. You know, this story might be free of charge but I think you ought to have at least some conscience to review this as a form of payment. All things in this world are not free, Mister! And if you would like to criticise, please give constructive criticism like Quickjewel did, not something like, 'you suck!'