Chapter One- Erik's Lament
"Masquerade…paper faces on parade. Masquerade…hide your face so the world…can never…find you".
I sang quietly to myself as I heard Christine and her beloved Raoul in the distance.
"Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime, say the word and I will follow you…"
As if my heart wasn't broken enough, now I had to listen to this? Oh, how I wanted to die and then their happy tune stopped. I continued to sing my solemn song,
"Masquerade…" only to sense something I did not expect. It was her, my beloved Christine. No. This wasn't possible. How could she love a monster like me? She wouldn't return, not after all I had put her through. I had taken her to my land of darkness in the catacombs underneath the Opera House against her will. When Raoul had come to save her, I had tried to force her to choose me by threatening the life of her beloved and only ended up making her hate me. How could I have become so much of a monster and drive away the only one who had ever expressed emotions other than fear when they saw the abhorrence of my grotesque face? "That was it…" I said aloud to myself, "I am a monster and who could love a monster?" I knew I would never be anything more or less, and then I heard something I did not expect.
"You are not a monster dear Erik." A voice spoke from the shadows, a voice I knew all too well. Christine? I wondered. No. It couldn't be…she is off with De Chagny, more than likely making wedding plans; she wouldn't come back for… my thoughts stopped as I looked up toward the source of the voice. "Christine!" I said, her name accompanied by an embarrassing, high-pitched squeak, much like the noises that school-aged boys make when their voices are changing to that of a man. She smiled softly, giving a slight nod. "Yes…it is me." She answered, her voice ringing through my ears, sounding like nothing short of an angel to me.
"B-but…De Chagny! You two are to be mar…" I couldn't bring myself to say it. "Married?" she replied. I simply nodded as the smile that had been on my lips for the past few minutes quickly curled into a frown. I felt a few silent tears run down my cheeks as I looked toward the music box that had been my accompaniment, the happy little monkey sitting on top simply smiling back at me, looking so proud and cheery in his little Persian robes, knowing nothing of the real world and its cruelties. It had never endured what someone like me had. It had never been subject to public beatings for the sake of 'entertainment' at a fair nor had it been left for dead on a rainy night on the steps of a church. Nor would it ever experience true love… or the loss of it.
"Why the solemn look?" my lovely Christine asked. "You look as if someone has died" I shook my head, still looking at the monkey and its sickening demeanor.
"Not a person, but what I once thought to be happiness…and love." I stated, still not looking up at her. "Love? Who is your love? Should I be jealous?" Jealous? I thought. Why would she be…no, could she have come back for me? Or had she simply forgotten something, perhaps the engagement ring that De Chagny had given her, the one I had taken. She couldn't possibly be back here for any reason other than… I suddenly felt her delicate hand brush ever so softly, dare I say almost lovingly, across my cheek. I felt a few more hot tears run their course down my cheeks as I looked up, meeting her eyes. Oh, those eyes. Those beautiful deep brown eyes that held the innocence of a child, yet the wisdom of a woman twice her age. "Christine…" I whispered, so as not to release another of my boyish squeaks. "Yes my love?" she answered. My Love! Surely I must have been dreaming, never had she used that phrase while addressing me, not since De Chagny had confessed his love to her, I knew I had to be dreaming or even dead…that was it I was dead. Was this heaven? Could a creature like me ever truly reach heaven?
