Chapter Five-Returns & Goodbyes

Nathan hadn't spoken since Peyton kissed him. They were sitting in the cafeteria. Nathan was eating a sandwich. Peyton was playing with the hamburger he bought her. She couldn't eat. He knew why. He had run out of explanations for the kiss. It could have been the coke. It could have been Lucas. The only explanation he refused to accept was the fact that she had feelings for him.

"Are you mad at me?" Peyton asked out of the blue. "Because I'm sorry."

Nathan shook his head. "I'm not mad. Just confused."

"About drugs or the kiss?" she asked.

"Both." He told her honestly. "I know that it's an addiction Peyton. But I thought we were both trying really hard to work past it. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know." She shrugged. "I guess I thought that you had too much on your mind. I know that you didn't want to have to be taking care of me at a time like this. You have enough to worry about with Haley."

He nodded. She was right. He didn't want to have to be taking care of her. He would though. She was his friend. He would do whatever she needed of him. And he wanted to. "What about the kiss?"

Peyton shrugged. "I'm sorry."

"So it didn't mean anything?"

"Of course it meant something." She smiled. "Nathan, I really appreciate everything you've done for me. You've really been there for me the past couple of days. Even the past couple of months when Jake was in jail; you were the only one who understood the way I was feeling. I'm really thankful for that. Sometimes I see the way you are now, compared to the way you were when I was with you. Sometimes I think if we were together now, things would be different."

Nathan knew they would be. But was he ready to jump into something with Peyton? They were both covered in issues. Nathan had too much to think about right now. He couldn't. He wouldn't. "I'm sorry Peyton; I just have so much on my mind."

"It's okay, I understand." She agreed. She stood up and walked away from him.

XoxoxoX

Lucas was sitting in the waiting room hugging Brooke when Peyton walked in. "P. Sawyer!" Brooke exclaimed running over to her friend and throwing her into a hug.

"Hey," Peyton smiled. She was excited to see Brooke. At the same time, she wasn't. She wasn't ready to confess her addiction to her. Plus Brooke could read her like a book. She knew she would immediately question her relationship with Nathan. "I missed you."

"I know, California Is horrible. The parties are fun, but the boys definitely are not as cute as Lucas." She smiled. "Come for a walk with me, we'll catch up." She said locking arms with her.

The girls walked slowly down the hallway as they passed Nathan. "Nate," Brooke smiled nodding her head.

"Brooke," he replied and kept walking.

"Well what the hell? Why didn't he say hi to you?" Brooke asked Peyton.

Peyton shrugged. "We sort of came together."

Brooke's eyes lit up. "Do I smell a rekindling romance with former married guy?" she smiled. "P. Sawyer, you whoe!"

"Brooke," Peyton sighed. "Don't go there."

"Fine, fine, but I'm telling you, the way he looked at you, he totally wants on you."

Peyton rolled her eyes and continued walking.

XoxoxoxoX

Nathan sat down next to Lucas when the doctor came in. The doctor took his surgeon cap off and sighed. "Are Ms. James' parents here?" he asked.

Lucas shook his head. "I'm her, brother in law." He told the doctor shaking his hand.

"Former brother in law." Nathan corrected him. "And I'm her ex husband."

The doctor looked down at his clip board and nodded. "Alright, I need a number for Haley's parents."

Lucas handed him a slip of paper. "Is she okay?"

Peyton and Brooke were now joining the two. "I'm afraid there were complications during surgery."

"What kind of complications?" Peyton asked. "Is she okay?"

The doctor shook his head no. "I'm afraid she didn't make it." Nathan felt his heart hit the floor. The next thing he knew he was on his knees in tears. Peyton immediately rushed to his side to hug him. "I'm really sorry," the doctor told them. "I'll give you a few minuets before someone comes out to talk to you about where to go from here."

Lucas' expression was cold. He felt Brooke holding onto him but he couldn't feel anything. He was in shock. He watched Nathan and Peyton on the floor holding each other crying. Brooke even had tears coming from her eyes. Lucas couldn't do anything but stand there in shock.

Haley's parents rushed into the hospital a few minuets after the doctor told everyone what happened. The doctor hadn't been able to contact them during their commute. Lucas looked at them with worry. He glanced in Nathan's direction hoping for help. "They don't know." He whispered.

"She's gone," Nathan blurted out. "She's gone"