AUTHORS NOTE:
A short chapter today, deepest apologies, next one will be longer- promise………and as for the requested Eli and Grace 'moment'……..well it's coming, that's all I'm gonna say!
Grace quietly opened her bedroom door, and slipped inside.
Her eyes were heavy, and so were the impending questions that still pressed against her heart.
She hadn't gone to see Eli, only to ask him about love……..there was more behind her visit……….but when she found herself and Eli talking softly, and even a little philosophically- she'd forgotten all about the questions she had- and simply enjoyed being in his company.
She cursed herself now, as she slipped on her pyjama bottoms and pulled off the t-shirt she was wearing- she knew that sleep would be hard……when her mind was racing around, and she'd had her chance to air her thoughts- she'd let it slip.
Slowly Grace got into bed, not realizing how weak her body was until it lay on her soft mattress, and instantly eased.
Were her and Ayden right for each other?………why did being with him feel so perfect, yet oddly strange at the same time?………what is wrong with Jessie and the problems she is having with Katie?………….if being with Ayden is so perfect, then why is thinking about him and what they have so hard?………….why was Eli's hand hovering over her head?……….
Grace rolled over, and winced her eyes shut, forcing sleep upon them- it was hard, with all the questions still circling her mind, but eventually Grace nodded off.
Comforted by the sound of Rick and Lily's car pulling into the driveway, and a key jangling in the door- then their heavy footsteps climbing the stairs.
She went to sleep once she heard no more rustling in their room; she finally slept when she was sure the rest of the house was doing the same thing.
But there was still one family member still wide awake- Eli, lying on his bed, staring up at the same area Grace's eyes had been fixed on not two hours ago.
He sighed and rolled onto his side; trying to break his train of thought by his heavy movements- it didn't work……….her question still ringed in his ears.
"What does love feel like?…………."
Eli sighed once more, and tried closing his eyes- but Grace's face only appeared before him, her question still echoing- and his answer…….."infatuation has to go both ways……….."
Eli repeated his answer again, and his thoughts veered away from Grace- and back to the familiar Carla, who had also had Eli's fair share of late night thoughts.
Except this time, he didn't remember how soft her thighs were- or how he would twirl her hair between his fingers, and make ringlet- he didn't think about the way she sang along to any song that came on the radio- instead he started asking himself………when he stopped thinking about her……when he stopped wanting to be near her again.
Eli remembered the day of his father and Lily's wedding- he remembered sitting so close to Grace, after receiving the biggest blow to his heart from Carla's letter………he remembered whispering 'that's a pretty dress', and then slowly leaning in, leaning in so close he could feel her hot, sweet breaths on his neck.
He remembered how his heart raced- and then slowed down- all at the same time………he remembered only seeing into her eyes……….and how his lips suddenly tingled with a yearning he'd never felt before………..he also remembered their interruption, courtesy of Jessie- the sister with impeccable timing.
Eli suddenly sat up, and stared out at the blackness of the garage- his mind swimming with memories, and a sudden realization- he'd had his chance………
After their almost kiss, he could have pulled her aside, knowing that they both wanted so much to kiss that day- he could have pulled her aside and done just that………he could have kissed her, after Jessie left? Though it didn't feel right anymore……..he could have………but he didn't.
Eli's heart suddenly began to ache- as he realized, Grace once, may have had feelings for him- and he's allowed those feelings to slip……..to fade into nothing……he couldn't blame Ayden for him losing Grace, he could only blame himself.
Eli slowly lay back down, his head hurting more than ever now- as he silently cursed himself over and over again, for something he couldn't change.
