Untitled...so far

Clarice was cleaning the kitchen floor, scrubbing every tile, from right to left, next tile, and next with the acid smelling cleaning agent that, besides old Jackie in the glass, had become her second best liquid friend. The routine had been the same for a while now, how long she couldn't really tell because she had lost all perception of time, how quickly it passed, or rather how it managed to stretch until it almost became painful. And when it became painful she cleaned her kitchen floor, her cupboards, her bathroom, all the windows and the sink although the latter was really the one she despised, simply because once her sink was almost painfully clean and shining it showed the reflection of her face. Her distorted, exhausted face that she simply couldn't bare to look at any longer, she hadn't bothered to look at since...no, don't go there... scrub...right to left...don't think...

Looking at her hands which worked so swiftly, so determined, she noticed only subconsciously that her skin looked awful, irritated by the cleaning agent, red and covered by blisters, but ignored it, ignored it just as she had learned, over all those years at the F. B. I., to ignore ...ignore what? Everything...don't think...stop thinking...stop...stop?...

In the middle of her half-cleaned, half not-really-dirty-yet-anyway kitchen Clarice Starling, Federal Agent, lay her head on her hands, that had started to bleed slightly, and started shaking all over. Memories came flooding back, and no matter how hard she would try she could not really convince herself that she only felt this way because she had failed to come to terms with her daddy's death ...the dead night watchman..., had failed to make him proud, had failed to become better...white trash... had failed to save...whom? All the little lambs? All that you need Clarice, is a mirror!...

"Oh God, please!" she whispered "...please, please, please make it stop" and started to cry uncontrollably.


Note: Ok folks, that's my first attempt at ANY kind of fanfiction so please be kind. If you have any suggestions considering the title please feel free to tell me. Basically I couldn't name the thing simply because I don't know where it's heading. Logically, next step will be to bring the GD in...somehow...I'll figure it out.

Let me know what you think.

SolemnSong